Once Burned (21 page)

As they meandered down the beach toward the dock, Lindsay recalled Henry’s first day on the beach. They’d all had such fun, the three of them, and the way Noah had taken to him—not just that day but every day since—amazed her. She hadn’t allowed herself to wonder what she’d do if they didn’t get along, and now that fear seemed silly. Noah adored Henry and had been on his best behavior, wanting to impress him, and while he’d tried to impress Logan, how and why had been different. He’d wanted to get Logan’s attention, but with Henry…. She recalled how he’d let go of his too-cool-for-this attitude about baking cookies and how he’d listened so intently to Henry’s lesson about dancing, and she realized that her son wasn’t trying to garner Henry’s attention; he didn’t need to because he always had it. No, he admired Henry and wanted to emulate him.

The thought nearly stopped her in her tracks. The one that followed did.
I’m okay with that. More than okay, because I’d be pretty damned proud if he turned into a man like Henry. That’d be a helluva lot better than becoming one like Max or Logan.

Henry frowned at her, and to cover her distraction, she brushed the bottom of one foot against her leg like she’d stepped on something. She flashed him a smile and started walking again. Satisfied, he matched her strides.

“This is wonderful, us on the beach together,” he said after a while, “but something is missing without Noah here with us. The beach just isn’t the same without him.”

She stopped again and stared at him. “Did I say what I was thinking out loud?”

“No. Why?”

“Because I was just thinking about how well you and Noah get along.”

“He’s a great kid, Lindsay. You’ve done a wonderful job with him despite your ex trying to undermine your efforts.”

“Thank you.”

“Shall we head to your parents’ house and go get him? Unless you’d rather have me all to yourself for a bit longer.”

“I would, but….”

She chewed on her lip, indecisive, and he chuckled.

“Let’s go, then. Besides, I have something I want to talk to your folks about before they start packing to head back to Arizona.”

“Oh? And what’s that?”

“You’re just going to have to wait to find out.”

“Race ya to the dock?”

She didn’t give him the chance to decline her challenge. Dropping his hand, she shot forward and sprinted across the cold sand. His reaction was faster today than it had been on their first day at the beach, and he caught her halfway to the dock, but instead of passing her to secure the win, he matched her pace and ran beside her. Still, he had to work to run with her, and she took pride in that. When they reached the tall pilings that supported the long dock, they slowed to a walk, stepping carefully to avoid the sharp, broken shells of the mussels and clams that gathered around the dock in greater numbers than elsewhere on the expansive beach.

They passed under the dock and turned toward the long stairs to the top of it. As they climbed, Henry took her hand and kissed the back of it. The gesture wasn’t deliberate but habitual, an outward sign that she occupied his thoughts even as his attention was on the tall bluff crowned with evergreens and houses.

At the top of the stairs, they slipped their shoes on and headed up the short street and then left toward her parents’ house half a block down the road that ran parallel to the beach. Lindsay entered without knocking, and Henry followed half a step behind. Her parents and Noah sat at the dining room table working on the puzzle they’d started yesterday before Henry had arrived to pick her up for their date.

“You’re back early,” her father remarked. “We weren’t expecting you until this afternoon.”

“That was the plan,” Henry replied, “but we missed Noah.”

Lindsay watched her son’s face light up. The sentiment obviously meant a lot more to him coming from Henry than it would have had she said it, further proof of how attached the boy already was to him. Maybe that should worry her, but with the sensations and emotions Henry had wrought from her still firmly in control of her, she wasn’t afraid.

“Well? How was your date?” Debbie asked.

“Incredible,” Lindsay replied honestly.

“Hey, Noah, are you up for a game of catch in the backyard while your mom and grandma talk?” Henry interrupted before Lindsay could go into more detail. Both he and her son looked to her for permission, and the matching, hopeful smiles on their faces melted her heart.

“Have fun, boys. But don’t be too long because Henry has something he wanted to talk to Grandma and Grandpa about.”

Henry didn’t take the bait, only winked as he snatched the football off the counter and followed Noah out to the sliding glass door to the backyard. After a moment of indecision, Steve rose from the table and headed outside to join them.

“Details?” Debbie asked as soon as the door closed behind the menfolk. “Because I get the feeling something happened. Something good.”

Lindsay nodded. “The play was excellent. Shannon was amazing, and it was great to catch up with Pat and Aelissm and Bill and Mary. Henry and I danced in his living room for a bit when we got home, and finished off our evening with a, uh, spectacular finale.”

“And?”

“And he said he loves me. First time he’s said it.”

Debbie digested the information, searching Lindsay’s face as she asked, “And did you say it back?”

She shook her head. “He didn’t give me the chance to, and I get the feeling he doesn’t want me to yet, which I don’t entirely understand.”

“I do. He wants to make sure you trust it so that when you do—when, I say, my daughter, not if—you’ll know for sure that it’s real. And judging by the look in your eyes right now, I’d say he’s right to be patient with you. What’s wrong?”

“It just seems like it’s too soon. We’ve only been dating for a couple weeks, and yes, Montana was amazing, and yes, we’ve talked on the phone a
lot
since then, but….”

“You two have been together the whole time,” her mother commented softly. “Even if you didn’t realize it. So really, it’s not so soon at all. Let me ask you this. Did you believe him when he said it?”

“Yes.”

“Well, there you go.”

Her mother started to turn away, making it clear that the conversation was over, but Lindsay wasn’t done. She told Debbie what she’d thought on the beach about Noah wanting to emulate Henry and listed out the examples that had led her to that conclusion.

“What do you think about that?” she asked her mother.

“I think Henry is a fine example for your son to follow.”

“Thank you, Mama. I needed to hear that.”

“You need to stop worrying and overthinking things, Lindsay. Remember what I told you about expecting this to fail?”

“I’m trying to, but old habits are hard to break.”

“I know they are, my sweet girl.” Debbie hugged her. “And I wish to God you’d never had reason to form those habits. But I see Henry starting to break them.”

Nodding, Lindsay walked over to the back door to call Henry, Noah, and her father inside.

“Is it time?” Henry asked.

“Yes, it is. Spill your guts, Mr. Hammond.”

He set the football on the counter and leaned against the island, waiting until everyone had gathered around him before he spoke. “Christmas. I want you all to come to Northstar for the two weeks Noah has off from school. I’ve already reserved our vacation rental for you, free of charge.”

Lindsay’s first thought was to reject the idea, but with her mother’s words fresh in her mind, she swallowed that urge, which allowed her to see clearly. “How long have you been planning this?”

“Since the day I called you to ask if I could come see you.”

Her mother looked pointedly at her, and she ignored her.

“Can we, Mom?” Noah asked. “Please?”

“You’re supposed to spend Christmas with your father, Noah.”

Disappointment splashed across her son’s face, and his shoulders fell. “I don’t want to go. I’d rather go to Montana and see Henry’s ranch and meet his family. Dad doesn’t want me to come for Christmas anyhow. You know he doesn’t.”

“Considering how much coercing it took to get him to agree to Christmas,” she said, “I’m sure it wouldn’t be too hard to make different arrangements for you to go see him some other time.”

Instant mood reversal.

“Really?”

“Does that mean you’ll all come?” Henry asked with an adorable hopefulness that matched her son’s.

“I know I’d love to see this place that has stolen my daughter’s heart,” Steve said. “And with our stay already paid for, how can I say no? What do you say, Deb?”

“I’m there.”

“Lindsay?” Henry asked.

“You know I miss your family and Northstar,” she replied. “And since I’ve been living here, I can actually afford to take the time off.”

“So you’ll come?”

“Yes, Henry, we’ll come.” She kissed him firmly, and when she stepped back, he was grinning like a fool. “I can’t wait.”

WHEN LINDSAY WALKED out of Donovan’s three days later on Tuesday, Henry and Noah were waiting for her in his truck. Instead of getting off the bus at her cousin’s like he usually did when Lindsay worked the dinner shift, Noah had gotten off at home and spent the afternoons with Henry. Her parents had left for Arizona early yesterday morning with the plan to meet up in Northstar on the twenty-first, and when they had suggested Sunday night before their departure that Noah might enjoy being at home in the afternoons instead of at his cousin’s and that he might also be more likely to get his homework done immediately instead of drawing it out, Lindsay had surprised herself by agreeing. Henry had liked the idea, and Noah had jumped at the opportunity to spend more time with him. That she was entirely comfortable leaving her son alone with Henry was a monumental step forward because she’d never trusted Logan enough to let him watch Noah, and she hated leaving her son with his own father.

“You boys have fun together this evening?” she inquired when they climbed out of the truck to greet her.

“Once I got my homework done, yeah,” Noah replied. “We threw the football on the beach. Actually, even homework was kinda fun. We did our own liquid density experiment like the one I did in class today… only Henry’s actually worked how it’s s’posed to. I’ll probably be the only kid in class with the right answers on the homework.”

“I’m impressed by you both. Did you thank him?”

“Yes, he did,” Henry replied, leaning down to kiss her cheek. “How was work?”

“Long and exhausting as usual.”

“Hopefully we can help with that a bit. We made spaghetti, and while it isn’t nearly as good as what you make and will have to be reheated since we ate a couple hours ago, we thought you might appreciate not having to cook dinner for yourself after work.”

Lindsay nearly sighed with relief. “I do indeed. You’re spoiling me.”

“And enjoying it, so get used to it.”

“You deserve to be spoiled, Mom,” Noah remarked.

She hugged him. “Aw, thank you, bud.”

“You were able to get the two weeks off, right?” Henry asked.

“Yep, thanks in large part to Mitch. The manager didn’t want to give it to me since we’re always busier over the holidays, but Mitch suggested I might quit if I didn’t get it—fat chance of that happening, and Mitch knows it—but it worked, and I have the twenty-first through the third off and back to work on the fourth.”

“Hey, Mitch!” Henry called, spotting the cook as he stepped out of the restaurant on his way home.

The heavyset man glanced up and waved when he spotted them.

“Thank you!” Henry called.

“You’re welcome,” Mitch replied. “Take care of my girl over there in Montana.”

“You bet I will. Have a good night.”

“You as well.”

Turning back to Lindsay, Henry grinned. “I like him.”

“He’s a good man,” she agreed. “Like you. Other than Skye and Evie, he’s probably one of my best friends even if we only ever talk at work. And I owe him big time.” Sighing happily, she gestured for Noah to hop in the truck and climbed in after him. “I can’t remember the last time I had two full weeks off. The ten days I took off for Evie’s wedding was amazing, but a whole two weeks? I may never want to come back.”

She entertained herself as Henry drove out of the parking lot of Donovan’s Bar and Grill by imagining all the ways an extra four days off would feel, especially an extra four days off to spend in Northstar with Henry, both their families, her son, her friends…. The end-of-day fatigue melted away just thinking about it.

“Guess that answers the question of whether or not you’re having second thoughts with a definitive no.”

“I’ve had second thoughts about a lot of things in my life, but spending Christmas in Montana with you isn’t on that list.”

“And what about you, Noah?” Henry asked. “Any second thoughts about it?”

“Are you kidding me? I’ve wanted to go to Montana since Mom came back! Do you think we’ll have a white Christmas?”

“Most likely. I can’t remember one in my lifetime when there wasn’t snow on the ground.”

“I’ve never had a white Christmas before.”

“Not even when you were at your dad’s for Christmas? Doesn’t he live in Spokane?”

“Yeah, but both years I’ve been at his house for Christmas, there wasn’t any snow.”

“I’d say you’re in for a first, then. What about you, Lindsay?”

“Two that I can remember. We don’t get a ton of snow out here.”

Henry drove home, and Lindsay listened as he and Noah talked about all the fun things they could do in snow on their trip. Now that she knew for sure she’d have the entire two weeks off, she’d have to call Max to tell him Noah wouldn’t be coming for Christmas. She didn’t think he’d mind too much since it had been such a battle to get him to agree to have Noah over for just three nights, but regardless, she wasn’t looking forward to talking to him. Noah had only talked to him once since Henry had been in Washington, and she hadn’t talked to him at all, and the lack of that chaos in her life had been nothing short of wonderful. Too bad it couldn’t always be like that.

Too soon, Henry parked in front of her parents’ house. Weariness descended on her at the thought of her call to Max about Christmas.
Just get it over with
.

Henry unlocked the door and held it open for her and Noah. He offered to reheat some spaghetti for her while she called her ex. She took the cordless into the living room, dialing his number as she walked, and sank onto the couch to kick off her shoes while she waited for him to answer. Her heart skittered nauseatingly when he answered, but unlike days gone by, it was only anxiety she felt. There was not even a flicker of her former infatuation with him left to stir longing.

“Noah?”

“No, it’s Lindsay.”

“Well, isn’t this a surprise. It’s been a while.”

“Not long enough,” she said tiredly. “I have something I need to talk to you about or—believe me—I wouldn’t be calling. It’s about Christmas.”

“I thought we had everything planned out for Noah’s visit already.”

“We did, but there’s been a change in plans. We—Noah, my parents, and I—have been invited to spend Christmas in Montana.”

“Invited by whom? Evie?”

“No.”

“Don’t tell me that Henry guy Noah’s been talking nonstop about invited you.”

“Yes, he did.”

“You’re not seriously thinking of going.”

She ground her teeth. He had a way of making her feel like a chastised child, and he had no right to dictate what was good or right for her. If he’d ever had that right, he’d long since lost it. “Not just thinking about it. We
are
going.”

“No, you aren’t. It’s my turn to have Noah for Christmas. I won’t let you take that away from me like you’re trying to take everything else away.”

“Trying to take…? You’ve got to be joking. I had to
beg
you to agree to let Noah come over for Christmas.”

“I’m not joking, Lindsay. I don’t want my son around that man.”

“Now he’s
your
son? You know what, Max? Spending time with Henry has been good for Noah.
Very
good for him. He’s getting his homework done early every night, he’s actually
enjoying
school for the first time this year, and he’s started to
willingly
help out around here. I’m sorry you don’t like it, but Henry’s a great role model for him.”

“Like Logan was? He was a real great role model for our son, chasing after you like a dog after a bitch in heat.”

“Don’t even go there with me, Max, because right now, I’m inclined to lump you into the exact same category as Logan.”

“My dad is
nothing
like Logan was,” Noah spat.

Lindsay glanced up, suddenly realizing that he’d been standing close enough to hear Max’s end of the conversation along with hers. Anger and pain burned in his eyes. Despair crashed down on her. “We’ll talk about this in a—”

“No. I don’t want to talk about it because Dad is right. All Logan wanted was you, and you were too stupid to know that he was only pretending to like me.”

“I have to go,” Lindsay said to Max and abruptly ended the call. By now, Henry had joined them in the living room, but she ignored him and addressed her son with fury and agony fighting for control of her. “Noah Ulrich, how dare you speak to—”

Henry stepped between them, leaning down with his back to her and his face just inches from Noah’s. The boy’s eyes rounded, and in the reflection on the glass doors of the entertainment unity, Lindsay caught a glimpse of the reason why. Henry’s expression was stony. Shock tinged with a hint of curiosity obliterated any consternation she might have felt over such a blatant and uninvited intrusion into her duties as Noah’s parent.

“You owe your mother an apology,” he said in a low voice.

“You can’t tell me what to do,” Noah retorted. “You’re not my dad!”

“Obviously not. No son of mine would
ever
treat his mother with such disrespect.”

Noah opened his mouth to counter, then snapped it shut.

“I will not tolerate the kind of attitude you are displaying right now, Noah, so until you learn to address your mother with the respect she deserves, our time together is done. No more help with your homework after school, no more football on the beach, no more guy time. You can go back to getting off the bus at your cousin’s after school. Oh, and no trips to Montana with your mom, either.”

“The trip’s off anyhow, so who cares?” His voice wavered, and Lindsay could see the implications of Henry’s promises sinking in.

“There will be other trips, Noah, so you might want to head to your room and think about that for a while.”

With lip quivering and tears threatening to spill over, Noah dashed to his room and slammed the door. Lindsay winced. Henry straightened but remained where he was, looking over his shoulder toward Noah’s bedroom on the other side of the wall at the far end of the living room. The muscle in his jaw pulsed, and his brows were drawn low in regret, and to see that scolding Noah hurt him endeared him even more to Lindsay.

It was almost a minute before he turned to her.

“I’m sorry for overstepping my bounds, Lindsay,” he murmured, siting beside her on the couch with that same pained expression.

“Don’t be sorry,” she replied. “It’s what he needed—to hear that from someone he respects. He gets caught in the middle between Max and me, and he has to defend whichever of us he feels is under attack. I can’t fault him for loving his father even if Max doesn’t much deserve it.”

“I can’t fault him for that, either, but you bust your ass to make sure he has everything he needs, and you do not deserve to be talked to like that, regardless of the reason.”

He folded her into his arms, and she leaned into him.

“I am so sick of this. So sick of fighting Max and watching him turn my son into that nasty, mouthy brat you just saw… because that is
not
my son. My son is a kind, warm-hearted boy.”

“I know who your son is, Lindsay,” Henry whispered. “And that’s why I had to step in. I had to remind
him
of that.”

That undid her, and without warning, she broke down. Tears poured from her eyes as frustration, guilt, and rage melded together with gratitude and hope, and Henry held her with unwavering patience as she cried. He didn’t have to say it for her to know she had permission to fall apart, and the freedom to do so began to stitch her ragged thoughts and emotions together again.
Every time
, she thought.
Every time this happens, my heart breaks a little more. But I finally have someone to help me put it back together.

“I’m not going to let you cancel your trip to Montana,” he whispered. “So we’ll have to find a way to accommodate Max.”

“No.” She straightened but didn’t move to pull away from him. She wasn’t strong enough to leave his embrace just yet. “I don’t want to accommodate him, and I most certainly don’t want to cancel our trip to Northstar. I need it too much.”

“So, what do you want to do about Max?”

Bit by bit, she gathered her courage, bolstered by Henry’s gentle support. “As far as I’m concerned, he can go to hell. Unfortunately, that’s not an option.”

“No, it isn’t.”

“I don’t even want to consider this because I don’t want to cut our time in Northstar short, but would it be too big a pain to leave a few days early and spend New Years in Spokane so Noah can spend a night or two with his dad?”

Henry briefly got up to fetch the magnetic calendar from the fridge and rejoined her on the couch. “The beauty of this whole trip is that everything is flexible and negotiable, so that wouldn’t be a pain at all. It’s only about a six-hour drive from Northstar to Spokane, so we could leave early on the thirtieth or the thirty-first.”

“Better make it the thirty-first. I don’t want to have to cut our trip any shorter than I have to, and if we leave early enough, Noah will still have plenty of time on New Year’s Eve with Max.”

“Do you think Max will go for that?”

“Guess I’ll find out,” Lindsay replied, picking up the phone again. She pulled Henry’s arm tighter around her waist.

“What the hell was that all about?” Max demanded without bothering with a greeting.

“Never mind what it was about,” she replied. “Here’s what’s going to happen, and you can either take it or leave it. I really don’t care. We’re driving to Montana on the twenty-first, and we’ll leave early on the thirty-first so you and Noah can spend New Year’s together. We’ll leave Spokane on the second, which will give us a couple days to rest before he has to go back to school the following Monday.”

“No. I want Noah for Christmas, Lindsay. Giselle and I have already made plans, and besides, I thought was very clear about not wanting Noah around Henry.”

“Maybe if you’d chosen to be more of a father to Noah to this point, I’d give a damn about what you think. As it is… I don’t. I’ve made accommodations to make sure you still get to see your son over winter break, but Noah and I
will
be in Montana for Christmas. What’ll it be, Max? Because if you don’t want to take the offer, we’ll happily spend those extra days in Montana.”