Read One Step at a Time Online
Authors: Beryl Matthews
‘Yes I can!’ Now she was angry. ‘I’ve been writing sales slips all week.’
‘So you have.’ He watched as she carefully signed her name.
Then without a word she turned and left the shop by the back door. She didn’t immediately go to the
bus stop, as she needed time to compose herself and decide what was the best thing to do. But one thing she was sure about, she couldn’t tell Mrs Dalton and the others she had been sacked after only a week. They would want to know why.
Walking along the King’s Road, her head down, she was oblivious to the cold wind blowing her hair around her face. She had been sure she could do the job, and she would have if they hadn’t found out so soon. All she had needed was a bit more time and she would have worked out a way, but the manager hadn’t been prepared to give her that chance.
Her jaw clenched in frustration as she stood in line at the bus stop, refusing to let the tears of shame fall. She had until Monday to decide what to do.
Monday morning and Amy was up and dressed for work at her usual time. She’d really enjoyed yesterday, painting for Howard, then sitting for Ben in the afternoon. Ted had brought home a large joint of beef, given to him by a butcher friend, and she had cooked lunch for all of them, except Mrs Dalton, who was out for the day. She seemed to have lots of friends.
At the end of the day, comfortably tucked up in bed with Oscar curled up next to her, she had decided what to do. The first thing was to find another job, and if she went out and returned home at her usual time each day, they wouldn’t know she had been sacked. She was going to tell them, of course, but it wouldn’t seem so bad if she had another job to go to.
‘One step at a time, eh, Oscar?’
The cat looked up and blinked in agreement.
Although very worried, she couldn’t help laughing at the way she had begun to talk to the animal. Her mother would never have a pet around, and Amy found him good company and comforting.
The thought of her mother brought the sadness back. Dolly had never been overly affectionate, but that was because she had been ill, and the horror of the trial and hanging had been too much for her. She was sure her mother had loved her, though, and she missed her.
Finishing her breakfast, she stood up with a determined air. That part of her life was over and she had been given a chance to start again. Amy already adored each member of her adopted family, and she was
not
going to let them down.
She left the house, her steps sure as she walked to the bus stop. There wasn’t anything to worry about. She had enough money in her old teapot to last her for a while. When she had asked Mrs Dalton for a rent book, she’d said that as Amy was in her care, she wouldn’t have to pay rent until she was eighteen. Such kindness was overwhelming, and she’d buy her a nice present when she had enough saved. It would be a way of showing how grateful she was.
A bus came as soon as she reached the stop and she jumped on. With a bit of luck she might get to the Labour Exchange before the crowd.
*
One week passed, then two, and three. There just weren’t any jobs around that she could do, and dozens of applicants for each job as it became available. The endless search was taking its toll on Amy, and making it harder and harder to keep up the pretence that she was still working.
After being turned down again, she returned home. It had been yet another tiring, frustrating week.
Before even taking off her coat, Amy went to the kitchen. She was gasping for a cup of tea. Lost in her own world of misery, she wasn’t immediately aware that the little room was crowded.
‘Happy birthday, Amy!’
She gasped in surprise as Mrs Dalton, Ted, Ben and Howard began to sing the birthday song – not very tunefully. In the centre of the table was an iced cake with a lighted candle on the top, plates piled high with sandwiches, and little dishes of jelly.
‘What’s the date?’ Amy was stunned. So much had been happening in her life just lately that she hadn’t given her birthday a thought.
‘My dear girl.’ Mrs Dalton came and kissed her cheek. ‘Don’t tell me you had forgotten such an important day. It’s the eighth of December and, according to the information given to me when I took over your care, this is your fifteenth birthday.’
‘Oh, I had forgotten.’
Each one came forward in turn and gave her a parcel until her arms were full. She could feel the tears fighting to escape and she blinked rapidly to
keep them at bay. Her father had never been around on her birthday, and her mother hadn’t made much of them, so this celebration was quite outside her experience. She just stood there hugging the presents, her throat tight with emotion, unable to speak.
‘Open them, Amy,’ Howard urged.
She opened them one at a time. There was a lovely warm dress from Mrs Dalton in cherry red. ‘Oh, Mrs Dalton, this is the loveliest dress I’ve ever had.’ Amy held it up in front of her to let everyone admire it.
‘That’s a stunning colour.’ Ben nodded approval. ‘I’ll have to paint you wearing that; it looks lovely with your dark hair.’
‘That’s what I thought when I saw it.’ Mrs Dalton checked the size. ‘That should fit you all right, but we can change it if it doesn’t.’
‘I’m sure it will be fine.’ Amy wasn’t going to let such a lovely creation be returned to the shop in case they didn’t have another one the same colour.
The next parcel was from Howard, and she cried in delight when she held up the cat she had painted. ‘Thank you, that will look lovely in my room.’
‘The shopkeeper said it was lovely as well, and has ordered a dozen, but I told him he couldn’t have that one.’ Howard gave her an impish grin. ‘You’ve got a lot of painting to do.’
‘I’ll spend all day tomorrow doing them.’ The misery she had felt was pushed to the back of her mind. She wasn’t going to spoil this moment.
The next present was from Ben. It was a framed sketch of her sitting by the river.
‘That’s to remind you when we first met.’
‘I love it. Thank you, Ben, and can I have it on my wall?’ she asked.
‘Of course. I’ll do it this evening for you. Have you still got the drawing I gave you?’
She nodded.
‘I’ll frame that for you as well, if you like?’
‘Oh, please!’
There was only one more present left and that was from Ted. Amy’s heart nearly stopped beating when she held a lovely leather-bound book in her hands. The misery and shame were back in full force as she clutched the book to her. The tears would not be denied any longer.
‘It’s beautiful, thank you, Ted.’ She wiped the back of her hand over her wet cheeks.
He smiled gently. ‘When we were moving your things I noticed you had a book by Jane Austen and thought you might like another one.’
‘I would; she writes such lovely stories.’ When she was quiet tonight she would try to see what the book was called. As she looked at their smiling faces and the presents littering the table, she knew she couldn’t tell them her secret. She just couldn’t.
‘Come and cut your cake, Amy.’ Ben held out a knife. ‘We’re all starving.’
‘Are you ever anything else?’ Mrs Dalton declared, making them all laugh.
Amy took the knife from Ben before blowing out the candle and sending up a silent wish that she would find another job soon, then she cut the cake.
The food disappeared with great speed, as it always did with the two boys around. Mrs Dalton made them all laugh by saying that it wasn’t surprising as there was a lot of them to fill up.
Listening to the laughter and chatter around the table, Amy thought that she had never had such a lovely birthday. If she hadn’t lost her job she would have been completely happy, but although she refused to dwell on it, the memory lingered, waiting to pounce and bring the worry back.
When they’d finished eating, Amy began to clear the table, but Mrs Dalton stopped her.
‘I’ll clear up for you tonight, my dear. You show Benjamin where you want your picture.’
Leaving Mrs Dalton to it, they all trooped into Amy’s room. The first thing she did was hang the dress in the wardrobe. It was so lovely and she couldn’t wait to wear it. Then she put the smiling cat on the mantelpiece while Ben disappeared to get a hammer. The book she placed on the table by the window and ran her finger over the title. It was a single word beginning with ‘E’; she could see it quite clearly.
‘I hope you haven’t read
Emma?
’ Ted was standing beside her.
‘No, I haven’t.’ Her smile was bright. That was the truth, anyway.
‘Let me know what you think of it.’
‘I will.’ It would take her a long time, but she was determined to read some of it.
‘Right, where do you want this, Amy?’ Ben was back.
‘On the wall opposite my bed so I can see it when I wake in the mornings.’
The job was soon done and she sat on her bed to make sure it was in the right position. ‘That’s perfect, thank you.’
‘If you’ve got the other one I’ll take it with me and frame it for you.’
She scrambled to her feet and took it out of the bedside table drawer.
‘I’ll let you have it back sometime tomorrow.’ Ben took it from her and looked around the room. ‘I think it will go on the same wall as the other one, don’t you?’
‘Yes please.’
‘Let’s give Amy some peace and quiet.’ Ted began to usher the boys out. ‘She looks tired.’
‘Come down in the morning as soon as you like, Amy.’ Howard had stopped in the doorway and looked back. ‘I’ll leave everything ready for you. Paint as many pots and cats as you can.’
‘You can’t have her all day,’ Ben protested. ‘I’ll need her for a couple of hours in the afternoon.’
‘All right, but I’ll time you.’ Howard grinned. ‘My need is greater than yours.’
Ted raised his eyebrows. ‘I can see you’re not going
to have a moment to yourself with these two. Don’t let them monopolize all your time.’
Ben gave Ted a wry smile. ‘That’s what brothers are for, aren’t they?’
‘That’s as maybe.’ Mrs Dalton had looked in. ‘But you can let your sister get some rest before you run her ragged tomorrow.’
That made everyone laugh as they filed out and left her alone.
Amy was staring at the closed door when she felt Oscar rub round her legs. She swept him up and felt his body vibrating with a deep purr, resting his head on her shoulder.
‘What do you think of that?’ she asked the cat, running her hand along his sleek back. ‘I’ve got two brothers! I’ve got a proper family and they gave me a birthday party and presents. Isn’t that wonderful?’
A wet tongue rasped up her neck, making her squirm. ‘Yuck! And I’ve got you.’ He dug his claws into her shoulder, just to emphasize the point.
She sat on the chair by the table and gazed at the book. ‘They’re all so kind,’ she whispered, ‘and I’m keeping things from them. But how can I tell them?’
The cat didn’t answer. He was fast asleep.
15
Yet more cold, frustrating days had passed and Amy still hadn’t found a job. There was just nothing around that didn’t need reading and writing. All the factory jobs were snapped up as soon as they were advertised because there were still a lot of people out of work. She was beginning to despair of ever finding anything she could do. And her conscience was really bothering her. She still hadn’t told anyone at home that she was out of work, and it got harder as each fruitless week passed. The decision not to tell them until she had another job was now bitterly regretted, but every time she steeled herself to say something, the words just wouldn’t come.
There was a cold wind blowing as she walked along Fulham High Road, head down, trying to decide what to do for the rest of the day. This trip had been another waste of time and bus fares, but she went after any job, anywhere. She was that desperate.
Spotting a café she went in for a cup of tea. It would be warm in there and she could spend an hour or so over her tea.
After buying her drink she sat down, sighing wearily. It seemed hopeless.
*
‘Hello, Ben.’ Ted frowned. ‘You look worried. What’s up?’
‘I’m not sure.’ Ben ran his hand through his thick hair to push it away from his eyes. ‘You got a couple of minutes?’
‘Sure.’ Ted put the ‘closed’ sign on the door. ‘I’ll make us some tea.’
The small room at the back of the shop was piled high with books as usual, and Ben had to clear two chairs before they could sit down.
Once the tea was made, Ted sat opposite him. ‘What’s troubling you?’
‘There’s a small gallery just opened in Fulham and I’ve been to see if they would be interested in my work.’
‘And were they?’
‘Yes, they’ve taken three landscapes to see if they sell.’
‘That’s good, isn’t it?’ Ted was puzzled. Ben didn’t look very pleased about it.
‘Oh yes, very good.’ Ben sipped his tea.
‘But…?’ Ted prompted.
‘After I left the gallery I was sure I saw Amy walking along by some shops.’
‘In Fulham?’
Ben nodded. ‘By the time I’d found somewhere to stop she had disappeared.’
Ted frowned. ‘You sure it was Amy?’
‘Certain, but what was she doing there, Ted?’
‘No idea, but I’ve sensed something was bothering
her for some time. I’ve tried to get her to talk to me, but she won’t. Whatever problems she’s got she’s keeping to herself.’
‘But we’d all help her, she must know that by now?’ Ben sat back, his eyes narrowed in concern. ‘Do you ever see her during the day?’
Ted shook his head. ‘She came in the first day she started at the shop, but I haven’t seen her since.’
‘That’s strange. You’re only a couple of minutes away. I’m worried, Ted.’
‘Me too.’ He stood up and pulled Ben to his feet. ‘Come on, let’s see if we can find out what’s happening. I’ve met the manager a couple of times, and I need a new pair of shoes.’
The shop wasn’t busy, and the manager came over to them as soon as they walked in the shop.
‘Hello, Mr Andrews, it’s nice to see you again. What can I do for you?’
‘I’d like a pair of black shoes please. Something sturdy, size nine and a half.’
‘Of course.’ He smiled at Ben. ‘And anything for you, sir?’