Only Vampires Cry Blood (18 page)

I loved him. As I took him into me again and again, I began to loathe the part of me that also felt for Arys. I wanted to be rid of it once and for all, to cut it out of me and never feel anything again for him but disgust. Even as I prayed for that, I knew it was a request that would never be granted.

So instead, I sought true solace from the living, breathing man beneath me, my mate.

He wasn’t part of the world I felt trapped within. For that, I was grateful. The shelter of Shaz’ embrace was the only thing that kept me from falling apart.

I felt Shaz’ cock twitch inside me, heard his moans start to come faster. The sudden swell of emotion brought tears to my eyes. I blinked them back so that they wouldn't fall and focused on the way Shaz’ body fit mine like a puzzle piece.

His embrace tightened around me, and he began to thrust up into me faster. I tried to match his pace, gasping as a sudden wave of climactic pleasure crashed over me. It continued to build until we were both slick with sweat, grasping one another as if it were our last moment on earth.

Shaz whispered my name before kissing me with a need so desperate it was almost painful. His fangs grazed my bottom lip, drawing blood. His characteristic hesitation was absent when he sucked at the small crimson drops. His tongue stroked the small cut softly, and that tiny motion sent orgasm smashing through me so that I shuddered in his arms.

His body responded to mine, and his orgasm hit hard and fast. He jerked inside me, spewing his hot release as my inner muscles clenched tightly around him. I gave a small shriek, overwhelmed by our simultaneous explosion.

“Shaz,” I breathed, his name barely audible on my lips. “Don’t stop. I need you.

Again.”

He didn’t waste a precious moment. Holding me carefully, he maneuvered us so that I lay flat on my back on the couch with him over me. The move was so precise, our bodies stayed joined in union.

Still hard as a rock, Shaz continued our love making with a renewed fervor. Then, I felt it, a firm, persistent nudge in my mind. Arys.

No fucking way
, I thought. The bastard locked me out of his thoughts. He had a lot of nerve to try accessing mine now. Maybe a glimpse of what I was up to would show him what he was missing. Was that too low?

I dropped the mental wall in my mind, letting him see and feel what I saw and felt.

My sexual awareness was instantly heightened. I concentrated on all of the emotion I felt for Shaz.

Arys didn't use words to communicate, but I could feel both his lust and his envy in response to what I showed him. He lingered in silence so long that I contemplated slamming my mental door on him. Before I could decide, I felt him slip away, leaving me alone again with my thoughts.

Even when trying to lose myself in my white wolf to escape Arys, I couldn't. My dark vampire always found me.

“Ok, spill it. I want to know everything, and I have been dying for this moment since I found you two all over each other.” Jez grinned before taking a sip from her fruity cocktail. “You were all over each other, weren't you? Because from the looks of that bite you had, you guys had something hot going on.”

“Sh!” I glanced around anxiously, fearful that we would be overheard. “I don’t want anyone to know about that. It was nothing.”

Jez raised a fine eyebrow and assessed me. “Right. It was nothing. Then tell me what happened. You can't withhold details like that. It’s not fair.”

I stirred the ice cubes in my drink with a straw and sighed. I’d known this interrogation was coming. I hadn’t anticipated that it would be in Lucy’s Lounge when Kylarai and Julian were at the bar ordering drinks.

“Jez, there has got to be a better time for this.” When she said nothing but stared with that feline expectance, I continued. “Kale was there during a hard time. I was upset because of Arys, and Kale was this source of comfort, of power. That’s all.”

She pursed her lips and studied me so hard I squirmed in my seat. “So you and Kale didn’t sleep together?”

I shook my head vehemently, my eyes straying to where Ky and Julian stood in line waiting. “No. Most definitely not.” I didn’t bother to add that if Jez herself hadn't interrupted, I likely would have. The thought both shamed and embarrassed me.

“Well, maybe you should bang Kale,” Jez said, catching me by surprise. “Lord knows the guy needs it. He is pretty hard up for you, and don't try to say that isn’t true.

You know damn well it is.”

I bit back the defensive retort that had been ready on the tip of my tongue.

“Whatever Kale feels for me, it’s all power based. And, that includes sexual attraction.”

Jez threw her head back and laughed. “Right. Whatever you say, Alexa.”

She flashed me a smile and a secretive wink that instantly raised my suspicions. Oh, I didn’t like that at all.

“Do you know something that I don’t?” I asked sharply. I loved the girl dearly, but she was a major gossip and enjoyed being in the know when others were out of the loop.

If she knew something, if Kale had confided in her, I wanted to know.

She shrugged and quickly looked down into her cocktail glass. She was so obviously hiding something. “I don’t know anything, just that maybe some things go deeper than power alone.”

“Did Kale tell you something, Jez?”

I knew she wanted to spill it. The need to tell was practically oozing off her. I waited, knowing she would break faster if I stopped pestering her. I continued to sip my drink as casually as I could muster, as if whatever she knew didn't really matter much.

“Ok,” she finally relented. “I already grilled Kale about you guys. He also said that you didn't sleep together. He then said it was none of my business.”

“Uh huh.” I nodded, impatience causing me to drain the last of my whiskey in one large gulp.

“But, he did add something.” She fiddled with the slice or orange adorning the side of her glass. I narrowed my eyes in annoyance. “He said that he didn't think he could ever sleep with you, even if it was just for kicks or for some power play. He said that if he did, he was sure he'd fall in love with you.”

I felt like I’d been hit over the head with a cast iron frying pan. The only thing missing was the sound of the impact reverberating in my ears. I looked to my empty glass for help. Damn, I needed a waitress. Stat!

No, no way in hell was Kale feeling things like that. I refused to accept it. I said as much, and Jez rolled her eyes at me. I grew frantic in my search for a waitress.

“Did you at least tell him how stupid that was? Or, that he was out of his mind, and no way in the world can he ever possibly have feelings like that for me?” I sounded desperate, and I grimaced.

Jez caught the eye of a passing waitress and beckoned her over. After we ordered another round, she turned to me. “You are nuts, you know that? You never just eat this stuff up. You always stress it.”

“Um, yeah. Of course. This isn't something to celebrate.”

“Well, you didn’t bang him yet, so who cares? Stop freaking out so much.” Jez’ eyes landed on someone behind me, and she lowered her voice. “Incoming.”

I busied myself by digging in my purse for cash as Kylarai and Julian took a seat at our table. Julian looked relatively uncomfortable, and I allowed myself a moment to enjoy that.

I was determined to have a relaxing evening with my friends, Julian excluded. The past couple nights had taken their toll on me. I chose an evening out at Lucy’s for a few reasons; one of them being that Shaz was there, even though he was working. Another was that I needed to occupy myself with something normal, something that didn't involve a trip to The Wicked Kiss or hunting and killing.

I’d been tempted to lie around at home and stare blankly at the TV. However, that was just too lame for words, and I refused to let Arys impact me on that level.

“It feels so good to have a night out,” Kylarai reached over to give my arm a squeeze. Her sweet smile was dazzling, and it was easy to see what drew Julian to her. If only he were actually worthy.

I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until the waitress returned with a tray laden with drinks. When she set three in front of me, I thought I was overdoing it until Arys walked through the door. Then, I almost choked in my rush to down one.

I ignored him, refusing to look at him. Instead, I focused on Ky as if his presence meant nothing. “You should go on a trip or something, Ky. You work so much. A holiday would be nice, wouldn’t it?”

Both Jez and Ky raised an eyebrow at me, expecting me to react somehow to the vampire’s arrival. Julian swigged from his beer with a nonchalance that he wasn’t smart enough to feign. He was clueless, as I preferred it.

I looked pointedly at Ky, encouraging her to continue the meaningless small talk.

She glanced at Arys where he lingered near the door, then back to me with a small shrug.

“Yeah, I’d love to take a trip to Maui. Every time I think about going, I find an excuse not to.”

Even though I wasn't looking at him, my full attention was on Arys. Julian made a comment to Kylarai about how she was a workaholic, but I could barely follow.

Arys’ presence hurt me in a physical way, the kind of pain that came with the sting of betrayal and abandonment. In my peripheral vision, I saw him look my way before heading over to the usual table where his card-playing buddies always sat. Of course, it had to be directly in my line of vision.

He pulled out his wallet and tossed a handful of bills down on the table. As the appointed dealer dealt him some cards, he made a show of looking them over carefully.

Then, he looked up at me.

I told myself to look away, avoid those blue eyes so they couldn't pull me in.

However, this was Arys, and if there was one thing I couldn't do, it was deny the way I reacted to him. He was part of me now. It took all the strength that I possessed to stop myself from going to him and throwing myself in his arms. Since I couldn’t slap my own face the way I wanted to without looking absolutely insane, I tossed back some more whiskey.

His stare was heavy, forcing my eyes to his. I slammed my glass down in frustration, causing some liquor to splash out onto the back of my hand. Arys watched as I raised my hand to my lips and slowly gave the splash a lick. What was I doing?

A slight smirk adorned his face, and he winked before looking back at his cards. The conversation at my table had continued, and I shook my head, trying to focus on what they were saying.

Who the hell did Arys think he was to walk in here as if nothing had happened? I could still see the visuals in my head, the things he’d shown me. The women he’d killed, getting off on their pain and their begging. I was riled, filled with both anger and jealousy.

“So then she calls me and says that she forgives him after all and wants to change her mind about the entire divorce.” Kylarai’s laugh drew me out of myself. “I mean, that’s her business, but she’s still getting a bill for my wasted time.”

“How the hell can she just up and forgive him after what he did to her?” Jez’ reply was laced with bitterness. She gave me a look that wasn’t lost on me.

“I don’t know.” Ky shook her head almost sadly. “It’s sad what some women will put up with in the name of love.”

I’d heard Kylarai talk about her profession as a divorce lawyer plenty of times. Yet, I couldn’t help but feel she’d brought up this particular story on purpose. And, Jez was doing her best to hammer it home. Yeah, I got it: Arys was an ass that deserved my drink in his face. I didn’t need to be told that, did I?

I threw back my drinks so fast that the alcohol seemed to hit my bloodstream all at once. The warm glow that enveloped me was false security, but I clung to it. Ordering another double whiskey, I shoved my chair back and announced that I was going to the ladies’ room.

“Oh no, you don’t.” Jez all but jumped to her feet. “I’m coming with you.”

I had to pass Arys’ table to get to the ladies’ room. I was a little surprised at her strong reaction. In my defense, I really did need to pee.

I detoured wide around Arys’ table, refusing to look at him as we went by. I could feel his eyes on me though, following me until I was out of sight. I was breathing hard by the time I shoved through the washroom door.

“Fuck, Jez! Fuck.” I didn’t know what else to say. I went to a stall and found myself grateful to be locked in the little metal box alone.

“It could only happen to you, Alexa,” came her reply from the other side.

“I don’t know what to do. Can you believe I want to sneak out the back way so I can avoid him?”

“Fuck that. You are not pussying out. What you should do is play him. Make him sorry he fucked with you.”

“Did he though? Because I keep feeling like this is all my fault.”

When I emerged from the stall and went to the sink, I found Jez’ reflection glaring at me in the mirror as she touched up her makeup. I used washing my hands as a means to ignore her judgment.

“How is it your fault that he is so insecure that he won’t allow you to get the help that you need? And, now he’s fucking around with the same person he wanted you to stay away from. Don’t make me shake you, lady. You are not the one in the wrong here.”

Jez’ words caused me to see Arys again in my mind. That visual of him and Harley in the Kiss, each of them feeding off that woman as they pleasured her, it was enough to make me ill. The worst of it was a part of me wanted to be in her place. I could barely admit it to myself, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to say it to Jez.

I splashed some cold water on my face, hoping it would bring me to my senses. It didn’t. I had to go back out there. I knew it, and so did he. If he gained the upper hand, it would be because I gave it to him. That couldn’t happen.

Taking a deep breath, I tried to draw strength from Jez’ supportive smile and exited the washroom. Arys’ spot at his table was empty. I should be so lucky. I almost breathed a sigh of relief, until his cold, dark power touched me a moment before he grabbed me from behind.

“What the fuck are you doing?” I tried to jerk away, but he held firmly onto my upper arm.

Jez glanced uncertainly from me to Arys, and I gave her a dismissive look so she didn’t feel obligated to hang around for this confrontation. She would have attempted to claw his eyes out if I’d asked it of her but maybe next time. She beat a hasty retreat back to our table, leaving me alone with the vampire that had changed everything for me.

“What? No kiss?” Arys asked, his smug grin stirring both positive and negative responses in me.

“You have a lot of fucking nerve,” I growled the words at him. I fought so hard to resist our power as it joined as one. Being one with him made it so much harder to feed the anger I held for him. “What game are you trying to play here, Arys? Because I am not in the mood.”

His grin slowly faded, and a shadow lurked behind his eyes. He let go of my arm, but I got the feeling he wasn't going to let me walk away. The desire to do so was fading, but thanks to the whiskey, my irritation was lively.

“I guess that’s for you to tell me, Alexa. You’re the one that started all of this.”

“Oh, here we go again.” I crossed my arms over my chest and glared. “Fuck that. I’m not wasting my breath arguing about this anymore. You got your way. Isn't that enough?”

His jaw clenched. I waited for him to dispute that. He was smart enough not to.

“I had my reasons, and you know that. I was worried about you. Why can't you accept that?”

“Don’t bother. I don't even want to talk about it. Now, you come in here all Joe Casual and act like nothing ever happened. Well you hurt me, Arys. You denied me something and got what you wanted. I don't think we have much more to say on the matter.”

“We have a lot more to say on it,” he snapped with a flash of fangs. “You made a deal with Harley. A deal that he still expects you to hold to. You promised him blood for answers, and he wants it.”

I was shocked. In my mind, that deal was a total wash. I never expected Harley to assume otherwise.

“What? Fuck that! After your temper tantrum in the parking lot, I didn't think there was a deal anymore.” Narrowing my eyes, I added, “I assumed I wasn't allowed to follow through with that.”