Only Yesterday (46 page)

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Authors: S. Y. Agnon

Tags: #Fiction, #Literary

BOOK: Only Yesterday
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  1. c h a p t e r t w o

    Tribulations of Travel

    1. I

      Close to sundown, the full wagon left, harnessed to three horses, loaded with nine people. The carter sat on his box and brandished the whip. The horses picked up their feet and started trotting easily and not fast. Easily, to make it easy for their owner to show the passengers they can rely on his horses, and not fast, for the road was long and the wagon was heavy.

      The wagon left the city, leaving behind Jerusalem and its neighborhoods. The wheels rolled and they came to the Valley of Niftoah. And from the valley on the right, Kfar Lifta appeared, surrounded by trees and gardens. From there, the wagon rolled on and came to Motza. The horses stood still by themselves, for it is a sim-ple custom that when they get to Motza, the horses stand still to rest a bit before they climb up the mountain. The passengers who weren’t yet weary from the trip and were neither hungry nor thirsty, complained about the carter, who stopped his horses. But the carter looked benevolently at his horses who know the time for every purpose.

      After they rested a bit, the carter signaled to them that the time had come for them to go. They bent their knees and bowed their heads and started going. The roads are winding, twisting and rising, they spin the cart and circle around themselves. And suddenly they seemed to descend into themselves and swallow themselves up. The cart rises up, and seems barely suspended and moving on thin air. The horses clop their feet on stones and knots and dirt, and dirt and knots and stones spray from under their feet, and they are suspended on thin air. The passengers began to fear they would fall and their bones would be strewn around. One remembered his wife and his

      I
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      little sons, and another remembered things he hadn’t thought about all his life and now, in time of danger, he remembered them. And they asked for mercy for themselves not to leave the world until they repaired in spirit what they had broken.

      The moon came out and illuminated the land. Vineyards were seen on the right and from the mountaintops, a kind of village was seen, Kiryat Yearim that is in Judea. Here the sons of Dan halted when they went to capture Laish, and here God’s Ark of the Covenant dwelt for twenty years until David took it up to Jerusalem, and because of our many sins, Kiryat Yearim was destroyed and its name was changed to Abu Gosh after the deceitful highwayman who robbed all those who went up to Jerusalem. And a Christian church sits on its mound, confident and secure.

      The roads were noisy. Caravans of camels loaded with mer-chandise file past, and the camel drivers sweeten their way with song, and the camels’ bells respond to their song. The carter also started singing. The cartwheels roll with the sound of the camels’ feet, who are walking as if on carpets. The moon floats between the mountains, and between the flanks of the mountains the big sea appeared along with part of the coastal plain. The carter stopped and looked at his horses and at the road they were traveling.

      One of the passengers said to the carter, Perhaps, Reb Zundl, you can sing something by Bezalel Hazan, like, Then all shall come to serve You. The carter laughed and said, I knew you would call me Zundl, but Zundl isn’t my name, my name is Avreml. The man said to him, Didn’t I hear them calling you Zundl? Said he, They call me Zundl because my younger brother was named Abraham after me. Said the other, How can you call two brothers by one name when both of them are alive? Said he, When my brother was born, they thought I was dead, and my mother, may she rest in peace, who couldn’t find consolation for me wanted them to call her newborn son after the son she thought was dead. And so they called my brother Abraham, with the nickname Avreml, as they called me. And when I returned here and my name was taken by my brother, they asked Rabbi Dovidl Biderman. Said Rabbi Dovidl, Call him Zundl. And so they call me Zundl.

      One man responded, What do you mean, they thought you were dead? Said the carter, Everything you want to know. If I tell you everything on this trip, what will be left for you to hear on the way back to Jerusalem? Aren’t you going back to Jerusalem with me? Said the man, I swear to you that I am going back to Jerusalem with you, and now tell me Reb Zundl, what was the story? Said the carter, When my brother isn’t with us, you can call me Avreml. I like the name they gave me the day I entered the Covenant and I like when people call me Avreml. The man said to him, And that story, what is it? Said the carter, There wasn’t any story, just simply, when I was a boy I ran away Outside the Land. I wandered around the world a lit-tle until the war came between the English and the Boers. I went and hired myself to the English army. After the war was over, I had enough of the world and I came back to Jerusalem. All those years when I was outside the Land, I didn’t write anything to Father, because they didn’t teach me how to write, even though I’ve got a good brain, and I still remember the sermon I delivered the day I was Bar Mitzvah. When a few years passed and they didn’t hear a thing from me, they despaired of me and thought I had already passed away. Meanwhile, Mother gave birth to a little brother and bequeathed him my name. And now you want me to sing you Bezalel Hazan’s Then all shall come to serve You. That, my friend, is impossible, for once I was traveling on the road and I started singing Then all shall come to serve You, and the horses started quaking and shaking and jumping and leaping until their yoke came undone to serve the Holy One Himself. You think I’m telling you made-up things. The God’s honest truth I’m telling you, just as my name is Avreml and not Zundl.

      Another man answered, Then sing us whatever tune you want. Said Avreml, Wait until I want to. Said that man, Don’t you want to? Said he, How do I know if I want to or not? If I sing I know that I want to, if I don’t sing I know that I don’t want to. That man sighed and said, If I had a fine voice like yours, I wouldn’t stop singing all day and all night. As he was sorry he didn’t have a fine voice like Avreml’s, Avreml started singing the Kedushah, A crown will they give You. Said that man, Such a Crown I never heard in my life.

      Avreml straightened his neck and said, You think I heard such a Crown? I never heard it either until now. Said that man, Did you compose it? Said he, By itself it was composed. Another man responded, How good you are, Reb Avreml. Said Avreml, Why will I be bad when I can be good? But in truth, I’m not good. But you’re a good man, and therefore you think that I’m a good man. Whoa. Where are you going, you bastards? Once again the horses turned off the road. You want to go straight and your animal doesn’t let you. And can a person be good if he’s mixed up with animals?

      The horses went the way their master led them. Sometimes the sound of the horses’ feet was heard and sometimes the sound of the cartwheels was heard. Isaac sat and listened. And the assembly of the sounds with the wind rattling among them made him sleepy. But he didn’t doze off. He was amazed that he had feared the trip when there was no need to fear. He stuck his head out and looked at the roads retreating and coming toward him. A mountain chain suddenly closed on them. When he got there he found nothing but shadows. But far from them rose a real mountain. And stars quiver-ing on it. Some of them shrouded and some of them like drops of water. And a sound like a sound of bells emerges from the mountain. What will Avreml do when he gets there, and how will he get his wagon through? When they got there, there was nothing but a flock of shadows. And an abundance of camels came and the bells around their necks emitted their sound.

      Isaac sits and doesn’t know if the thoughts he is thinking now had visited him before, or as they appeared to him it now seemed he had already thought them. He passed his hand over his eyes and was amazed. What is this? Before, other horses were harnessed to this same wagon. And the carter was also different, not Avreml and not Zundl, but Neta, the companion of Reb Yudel Hasid who traveled around with him to collect money for dowries. Isaac passed his hand over his eyes like a person who removes the sleep from his eyes. And he heard his heart talk to him, Since we are talking about your ancestor, let’s say something about him. Your ancestor Reb Yudel was a great Hasid and never in his life did he do a thing that wasn’t for the sake of Heaven. Now, let’s go back to our current affairs. So, we’re

      going to Jaffa, what will we say to Sonya when we come to her house? Whoa, where are you taking us, you bastards? You might think these words were said about the horses, but no, they were said about ourselves. You think they were said as parables. No, they were said literally.

      Avreml said to Isaac, And you, young fellow, songs you don’t sing, words you don’t say, and so what do you do? Isaac woke with a start and asked in a panic, I? Avreml started singing, I, I was greatly afflicted: I said in my haste, All men are liars. So what do you do? Said Isaac, I don’t do anything. Said Avreml, Which means you’re idle. When I studied in Heder, my teacher would say, Scratch yourself, just so you don’t sit idle. Another man said to his companion, What is sparkling so much, the sea? Avreml started singing, What ailed thee, O thou sea, that thou fleddest? By the time he finished, the sea disappeared and from both sides of the road, the mountains rose up straight and stopped, and the road began descending. They passed one ruin, and another ruin and they came to the coastal plain, to the Gate of the Valley, Sha’ar HaGai.

    2. I

The carter stopped the horses and the horses stopped the cart. And all the carts that had left before it and after it stood still. Sha’ar HaGai was beginning to fill up with vehicles and horses and donkeys and mules. Some were going from Jerusalem to Jaffa and others were going from Jaffa to Jerusalem. Countless people came and stood among the carts. Some looked at the moon and others set their watches. Some wanted to rest from the travail of the road, and oth-ers were looking for the carters. The carters disappeared. This one found himself a corner to rest, and that one went to tend to another need. Only the horses stood like sedate creatures, who know their sea-son and their time, and as long as their hour to go hasn’t come, there is no need to quake and shake.

Time slows down and doesn’t budge, boredom sets in, and boredom progresses. A person stands next to another person and knows that this isn’t the one he is looking for. And a chill comes from a person’s body and mates with the chill that comes from outside and

gives birth to a chill of boredom. Here, in this place, stands an old house, from its navel on down it is a stable and from its navel on up it is a coffee house. A big stove is lit with big kettles on it. A few trav-elers go in. Some of them stretched out on the ground, and some of them are looking for a place for their bones. All the places are already taken. This one is lying next to that one, and that one has his hands on his belly. This one is curled up like a fetus in his mother’s belly, and that one has his head on the belly of this one and his feet next to the nose of his companion. The servants of the house are running around holding cups and jugs of coffee, spilling half of it on those who are sleeping and pouring half of it for those who are awake, whether they want to drink or whether they don’t want to drink, and in spite of themselves, they pay several times more than that little cup is worth. And they grumble at themselves for coming into this den of thieves, for they could have done like the others who stayed in their cart and don’t have to pay for coffee. At that moment, the servants of the house go serve those who are sleeping in the cart, whether they want to drink or whether they don’t want to drink, and in spite of themselves, they pay several times more than that little cup is worth, and they envy their companions who hurried into the house. And since they had been awakened, they got up and took out their bags and extracted all the provisions they had prepared for the trip, bread and olives and sardines and vegetables, and sat down and ate their fill.

Between one thing and another, midnight passed. The carter came back and started shouting to his companions who were scattered to all four winds and were delaying the trip. They hurried and scurried into the cart. They wrapped themselves in all kinds of clothing and all kinds of blankets, for when midnight comes, a great chill makes its way in and anyone who is not wrapped up well is liable to catch cold. Zundl looked into the cart and asked, Is everybody here? When he saw that they were all here, he picked up the reins. The horses started walking without grumbling, for they were refreshed now, and yet they didn’t hurry and didn’t run, so the carter wouldn’t get used to that and give them less rest tomorrow.

They passed Latrun. A cool wind came and a smell like the smell of wet wheat stalks wafted over the whole road. The passengers

leaned their head on their shoulders and began dozing off. Only the cart wheels were awake. From time to time Zundl waved his whip over the horses’ heads, to announce that he still had his eye on them and to prove to himself that he was awake. In an hour they reached Ramle, the last stopping place for carts going to Jaffa. The passengers shook themselves awake, their limbs pressed and their tongues dry and their heads heavy and their whole body broken. Zundl agreed to stop the wagon for a little while. They went into the inn for a hot drink. The samovar was still hot, but its fire was about to go out. The innkeeper blew on the fire and brought glasses. Between one thing and another, the passengers asked him about the local people and their livelihood, for in those days about thirty Jewish families were settled in Ramle, cobblers and harness-makers and tailors who hadn’t found work in Jerusalem and went to seek their fortune in Ramle, and a League For Zion in Germany aided them a bit. When the passengers had quenched their thirst with tea, they got back into the cart.

Silence reigned. The sky was full of stars and the moon moved between the stars. All those with a watch took out their watch and informed their companions of the hour. Waves of sand rose and appeared, and the sight of the city of Jaffa and its gardens sprouts up. The horses suddenly picked up their feet and started hurrying, and the passengers started preparing for the city, place of their desire.

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