Opposite Sides (62 page)

He tore open Elisabeth’s
letter first, wishful to read the news of the small son he had
never seen, positioning himself on the outside of the tent and
standing in what shade it offered. There were several of them who
had chosen this spot to read and although they had little room
between them, each man became submerged in his own reading and
thoughts just as if there had been a vast landscape separating
them.

Elisabeth
began:

Mein sehr
lieber Erwin,

There has
been so much happening
. . .

She told him about a
group for officers’ wives she regularly went to and how busy her
life was as the mother of their child. He skipped quickly through
those sentences.

Little
Siegfried has just had his first birthday and he was so lucky to
have his so many nice presents. One would hardly think there was a
war. Papa always finds plenty for us to eat so do not worry about
us here. Just look after yourself, my dear, dear
husband.

Renard came
and called on us . . .

Hans had not heard
anything about his older brother since he had offered to take Hans
to France to show him where his submarine was docked. Renard was
proud of the submarine pens that had been built and made the
comment that with all the thick concrete overhead, they would offer
absolute protection against any air-raid that may occur. Hans never
did get to France. His superiors had other plans for him at the
time and since he had been in North Africa there was little chance
to see what excited his brother so.

He is serving
on a new boat +++++++ with Oberleutnant Emde, their
capitan.

I took our
little with me when I went to the De+++++++ M++++++ and they
thought him the most beautiful baby they had ever seen. Papa
comments on his beautiful blue eyes and says that with such blue
eyes he is certain Siege will become ++++++++++++++++++ like his
own Papa.

I met Frau B.
. . the other day. You remember. Her husband holds a very high
position in +++++++++++++ and has even personally been invited to
dine with +++++++++++ so I feel I should invite Frau B . .
.

He re-read that part of
Elizabeth’s letter and wondered what they would have in common when
the war did finally come to an end. His and Elisabeth’s worlds were
so far apart and now that he had been captured, things likely
remain that way for some time yet. He was uneasy about how he would
cope with those who had no knowledge outside the propaganda arena
of Dr Goebbles and who, like Renard, remained supportive of the
Führer and what he was doing to Germany.

Hans had been able to
share his concerns with other officers who were also uneasy. The
conversation usually began with a discussion concerning the
suspicion and fear one neighbour had of the other, the shortages
and rationing of food as well as supplies and the probability of
Germany losing the war and falling back into the terrible anarchy
of the early twenties. Surely this was not what they were fighting
for? And yet there appeared to be no end to it, not while Hitler
was in charge.

Hans was reminded of the
horror he had seen on the battle field and of the cruel things that
took place in war. He had witnessed the futility, the killing and
the destruction that had been inflicted on soldier and civilian
alike. There had been those quiet, waiting times when there had
been a lull and during which he could begin weighing up the
consequences of the driving forces that lay behind a war-driven
economy. It was becoming more apparent to Hans that those men who
had been responsible for taking Germany into the war, were either
insane, or had been totally taken over by their own importance and
their greed for power. But to do something to change the course was
extremely dangerous.

Elisabeth made no
reference to any withdrawals. She still wrote of Hitler being on a
winning streak and how Germany would ultimately win the war. He
guessed the propaganda output had increased and that the Nazi war
machine was using every means it could conjure up to continue to
deceive and hoodwink its population. What did she know about war?
Elisabeth was protected from the evil truth of war, for her father
had always been an ardent Nazi supporter. Hitler’s rise to power
was the reason why his business had done so well. Elisabeth’s
family had been able to live a life of privilege and new-found
luxury, in an inner circle free from the hunger and cold
experienced by the rest of the people as the rationing squeezed
their empty bellies tighter and made their houses colder.
Elizabeth’s father had become one of the Reich’s new rich and life
under Nazi rule had made his, and his family’s, life extremely
comfortable.

Papa’s been
extremely busy and has had to attend a lot of meetings. We rarely
see him now but I know it is a sacrifice I have to make. Our Führer
expects +++++++++++++++++ bit for the++++++++++++++++
Fatherland.

Hans noted that various
parts of Elizabeth’s letter had been struck out. It must have
contained some kind of sensitive information for it to have been
censored. A wispy smile passed his lips. He had done the same sort
of thing when letters arrived for the British or American
prisoners. Sensitive information to be selected out. He continued
with his reading:

I miss you
very much, my dear husband but I know that your duty is to serve
our Reich in distant lands. I hope that all is well with you when
you receive this letter and that soon you will get leave again and
be able to hold our son close to your heart.

Your most
loving wife,

Elizabeth.

Hans felt sorry for his
wife. What was in store for her when the reality of the war hit?
What was worse was that he realised that he had neither missed her
company, nor given her much thought. In a way, he wished that he
had never met Ott. But Renard was to blame for that. Renard had
brought Ott to his uncle’s house and it was Ott who had connections
to Elisabeth’s family. Hans was annoyed with himself to think so
easily manipulated by that group of ardent Nazi supporters. They
really did believe in this war and Hitler’s constant push to see
the creation of a thousand-year Reich. Yes, even poor Elizabeth
believed in that. What a shock it will be for them when the Allied
net tightens and the Reich begins to crumble.

Commander Brownless
decided to make use of Major Resmel’s good knowledge of English.
Facilities were stretched and translators were very few. It was
necessary that prisoners were processed as soon as possible so that
they could be sorted and transported to more permanent camps
overseas. The job of separating officers from lower ranks and
ordinary fighting men from ardent Nazis took many weeks and many
hours of interrogation. The Major would have a job to do until the
last man of the Afrika Korps had been questioned. As processed
prisoners were trucked off to a port to be shipped across the
Atlantic, Major Resmel, prisoner 81G-8624 remained
behind.

One afternoon, after a
busy morning, Commander Brownless made a special trip over to the
interrogation tent to speak with prisoner 81G -8624.

“
You may have
time away from your task, Major. There is someone who has been
making enquiries and wishes to speak with you. Report immediately
to the main area.”

Hans was puzzled. Still,
he obeyed and made his way over to the main tent where he was told
to wait until called.

“
You can go
in, now.”

The puzzled look on the
guard’s face was enough to tell Hans that even this soldier was
curious to know what was going on, and why this German prisoner
should have been sent for. But the guard had to remain outside. As
the Major entered the tent and let the side flap flop forwards
behind him, the soldier placed his rifle over his shoulder and
stood to attention.

Two figures were in the
tent. The light inside was too dim for Hans to see exactly who they
were. One, a sergeant, stepped forward. He saluted the senior
officer. He spoke.

“
Major
Resmel. I ‘ave ‘ere, with me, a nurse who says she knows you.
Nursed you when you were in our military ‘ospital a few months
ago.”

“
Would that
be Nurse Turner?”

“
Yes,
Major.”

Hans was bewildered and
confused. Why had Jan taken the trouble to find him?

“
She says
it’s taken some time to trace you after you left the ‘ospital but
this young woman, ‘ere, ‘as put in a formal request to speak with
you.” He turned slightly in the direction of the nurse and waved
for her to join them. “I’ll be outside, Corporal. Let me know when
you’re done.”

He saluted again and left
the tent. Hans remained standing, shaking his head with disbelief.
Jan adjusted her glasses and straightened her skirt before
speaking.

‘
Sorry for
last time, Hans.” She laughed a little nervous laugh. “We’re always
apologising to each each other, aren’t we?” He nodded. “I felt
awful about things, really. I just had to find you to straighten
things out. Even Aunt would be angry with me if I left things as
they were. Especially having bumped in to you a second
time.”

“
I’ll accept
that.” He indicated that they should move to the rear of the tent,
away from any eavesdropping ears. “But, Jan, you must have had
other reasons. You would not have gone to all these lengths, or
travelled so far, just to say
sorry,
Hans
.”

“
Well,
no.”

She cleared her throat
and re-adjusted her glasses. He knew she felt uneasy, for that
little habit of hers always betrayed her inner feelings. He broke
the awkward silence for her.

“
Why don’t we
sit? It’s much more comfortable.” He moved over to one of the light
wooden chairs and handed it to her before picking up another for
himself. “It’s good to see you, Jan. Really. I’m just overwhelmed
that you’ve gone to all this trouble. Just to say
goodbye
.”

Jan shoved her glasses
back again. He knew that she felt upset about something. He waited
for her to gain control of herself.

“
I . . . I
didn’t know you were married, again. I guess she’s very attractive
. . . or something.” It sounded awkward and he was not too sure he
heard her correctly.

“
You’re
meaning Elisabeth?” Jan gave a small sniff and quickly nodded. Hans
felt he had to explain. “Elisabeth and I really hardly know each
other. We had a month together before I was sent out here. I’ve
come to realise that I have little in common with her or with her
family, for that matter. She is a good wife but I do not think she
is the woman for me. Our views on politics and the war do not
agree. Her father wanted her to marry someone with a good rank.
Renard, and you know about that brother of mine, has an
acquaintance who knows Elisabeth’s father . . . and there not being
many men who could fit the bill, as one might say, and I was
singled out. Call it
duty
.”

“
You mean you
didn’t love her when you married?” He shrugged his shoulders. She
flicked her head backwards. “And you still married her?” He nodded.
Jan reeled almost with bated breadth at the thought but it was
Hans’ reaction that surprised her most. He threw back his head and
laughed.

“
Duty,
Jan.”

“
Duty?” her
voice was full of anger. “Is that all you can say?”

“
The world
has changed, Jan. Caroline was my sweetheart. I loved her and I
still feel the hurt of losing her whenever I think of her. With
Elizabeth it was a case of . . . .”

“
Of what?”
Her eyes blazed behind her lenses.

“
A marriage
of . . .” He took a deep breath. He did not know how she would
react. “convenience.”

“
For whom?”
He felt her pressure, her need for knowing and yet he hesitated to
give her an answer which would satisfy. He was not surprised when
she pressed him further. “How about me? I mean, what am I to you .
. . if anything at all?”

He noticed there were
small tears forming in the corners of her eyes and the corners of
her mouth had begun to twitch.

“
I’m not sure
how I think of you. I became very fond of you when I was in the
military hospital. I think we both felt there was a connection so
in that way you’ve become special.” He felt awkward, not knowing
what to say for he realised that anything more between them could
not be. He was married. He had a wife. He would remain married to
Elisabeth until the end. That is how the marriage contract worked
for him. And it was for a lifetime. His faith had taught him that.
Jan could not be part of his life in the way she was hoping.
Besides, this awful war would keep them apart on opposing sides
until it ended, whenever that was to be. He reached out and touched
her arm. “We’ve known each other for so long now, Jan. Been through
so much, haven’t we?”

“
Yes, I
realise that.
We
are
definitely not
enemies!”

“
No.” Hans
shuffled his feet and sat looking at them scuffing the floorboards.
“I don’t think we’ve ever been real enemies, Jan. Even as
teenagers. Just misunderstood each other, that’s all.”