Original Sin (57 page)

‘I thought you were drinking cocktails earlier?’

‘Cream and pineapple. Totally nonalcoholic but very sickly. I wouldn’t recommend it. ‘

Tess went outside and sat on a lounger by the small pool, shining like a sheet of sparkling tourmaline, while Sean made the call to room service. He walked out and sat next to Tess. ‘Am I allowed to ask what happened back there?’

Tess looked up, grateful that the cool Pacific breeze was cooling her red cheeks.

‘I saw my mother’s husband,’ she said simply.

‘Which isn’t your father … ?’ he said, brows creasing.

‘My dad’s dead. My mother remarried this guy, Anthony, who was one of my dad’s friends. That’s who I saw in the lobby.’

‘So why did you want to avoid him?’

‘Because it probably means my mother is here.’

‘And you don’t want to see her?’ he said, looking increasingly baffled.

Tess shook her head, looking down at the pool. ‘I haven’t spoken to her in twelve years.’

She saw the confusion on his face. Total estrangement from a parent was an alien concept to most people, especially to someone like Sean, brought up in the tightly knit Asgill clan, where life and business overlapped and every part of your life was planned, watched, and discussed. Tess sighed.

‘My mum and dad were never a match made in heaven,’ she began. ‘I think she always felt that she hadn’t fulfilled her potential with him. My dad, on the other hand, was crazy about her. You know some women have that effect on men.’

Sean nodded.

‘So my dad bought a pub in Suffolk – Constable country, a gorgeous place. We moved up there from North London.’

She smiled to herself. She could appreciate the county’s beauty now, but back then as a teenager, she’d been as negative about it as her mother. Back in Edgware, Tess was cool and popular, going to gigs in London, getting served in the local pubs. At the Suffolk sixth–form college, suddenly she was no one, an outsider surrounded by people who had known each other since primary school. These people thought she was showing off when she mentioned that she’d been to the Astoria or Hammersmith Apollo. London to them was somehow corrupt and unsavoury, and Tess was tarred with the same brush. Still, she made every attempt she could to fit in because she knew her father had made the move to save their family, which was why she had taken refuge at the college newspaper, where her own back–story wasn’t important as long as she could deliver her copy on time.

The bell to the cottage rang and Sean got up and returned with two bottles of beer on a tray.

‘I didn’t think one was enough,’ he smiled.

Tess took a long, grateful swallow before continuing. ‘My mum hated Suffolk. Instead of saving the marriage, it drove them further apart. She would go and spend half the week in London visiting friends while dad would be putting in fifteen–hour days in the pub. He still stuck by her, though,’ said Tess, shaking her head in wonder. ‘But it wasn’t enough, and finally she walked out on us. Turns out she’d been having an affair with Anthony, one of dad’s so–called friends, and she moved back to London to be with him. I stayed with Dad, of course. I’d just finished my A–levels and I had a place to do English at Bristol University, but I deferred it to help Dad in the pub. Dad had overstretched himself to buy it in the first place and he couldn’t cope alone. He tried, God knows he tried, but two weeks before Christmas, the pub got repossessed. My dad died of a heart attack a month later.’

It had been a long time since Tess had told that story, and all the years in between had not made it any easier. She could still remember vividly the day they moved from the pub into a rented flat in the village, and she could still hear the sympathetic whispers of the locals. But most of all, burned indelibly into her mind, was the memory of finding her father dead, slumped on the gaudy living–room carpet when she had returned from a supermarket run one evening. Twelve years hadn’t been able to wipe away that. At night she could sometimes hear the ambulance, the blue light flashing through the window and casting a ghoulish glow around the room. To this day she did not know what had caused his heart to give up. A genetic weakness, his expanding waistline – working in a pub serving ‘good solid English food’ certainly hadn’t helped – or perhaps it really was a broken heart, having lost his wife, his business, and his dream in the space of a few weeks.

‘I’m so sorry,’ said Sean, awkwardly putting a hand on her shoulder.

‘So I never got to uni,’ said Tess with a small smile. ‘You can probably tell.’ For a second she thought of Dom’s friends talking about their time at Oxford or Durham and looking down on Tess with her A–levels and on–the–job experience.

‘I got a very junior, very badly paid job on the local paper; the editor had been a regular at the pub and I think he took pity on me. That’s the path that led me here,’ she said, gesturing towards the sea. She brushed a hand against her cheek and it came away wet – she hadn’t even noticed the tears falling. At the funeral, her mother wept openly in the front pew of the church while Tess sat as far away from her as possible. She had not cried once that day, her grief crushed by a tight ball of anger deep inside of her. When she walked away from the grave, it was the last time she had seen or spoken to her mother.

She wiped her red eyes and inhaled loudly to catch her breath.
How ridiculous to be crying after so long
, she thought angrily, hoping Sean wouldn’t tell his mother; her career had meant everything to her. For twelve years she had worked so hard she would never feel lonely or insecure again. Money couldn’t bring her father back but it could give her a safety net from the world. She couldn’t allow herself to lose that; she had seen what it had done to her father.

She blew her nose and looked at her watch. It was now almost midnight.

‘Thanks for the beer. I should get back,’ she said, standing up, feeling suddenly embarrassed at her outpouring to someone she barely knew.

‘Are you sure you don’t want to talk about this some more?’

‘I’m sure. I just want to go to my room and pack.’

‘You’re leaving? I thought this was your holiday. What about the volcanoes and the dolphins?’

She shook her head vigorously. ‘And bump into Mother and Anthony on their romantic holiday? No way.’

‘But if you haven’t spoken to her for twelve years, maybe your mother isn’t even with Anthony any more?’ said Sean. ‘Maybe she’s not in Hawaii.’

She could be dead for all I care
, thought Tess, instantly feeling bad for having had the notion. She shook her head; surely she would have heard. And she would definitely have heard if her mother had left Anthony. Every now and then she heard snippets about their life through friends such as Jemma’s sister Cat, so she knew about their big house in Edgware, their life of happy retirement enjoying cruises and holidays, just like the one they were on now.

‘I have another idea,’ said Sean, looking thoughtful. ‘I was going to head to Maui tomorrow, it’s the next island over. My friend has a great house in Hana, a really quiet, fantastic spot. Why don’t you come?’

He looked completely serious.

‘No, they’re your friends … ’ she said, jangling the silver bracelets around her wrist. ‘I don’t want to intrude.’

Sean shook his head. ‘No, it’s just going to be me, if you can stomach that,’ he smiled. ‘Chris is away in Europe. I’m just staying there for a couple of nights before I head back to London.’

‘Sean, I can’t.’

‘Yes you can. You told me you’ve got a couple of days off yourself, and my mom is in Paris with Brooke doing wedding dress stuff, so she won’t be needing you. And really, I don’t bite.’

He smiled, his eyes crinkling up. Tess couldn’t believe she was actually tempted by his suggestion. But then she badly needed a break from New York. And she couldn’t stay here.

‘When are you leaving?’

‘Seven tomorrow morning, before anybody else is up and around, even for breakfast.’

‘I must be crazy.’

Sean laughed. ‘Hey, I could have told you that the day I met you.’

*

It was only a short hop over to Maui on a twelve–seater plane that Sean had chartered for the day. Maui looked more green than the Big Island, but its volcanic past was still evident from the huge, lunar–like crater she could see in the middle of the island. From the air, they could also see the perfect, crescent–shaped beaches all along the coast, some black, some white, some even a dark red. She loved it already. They landed at Hana airport, little more than an airstrip on the lush eastern side of the island, and climbed into an open–topped Jeep waiting for them by the tiny office building.

This was a different Hawaii to the one she had experienced on the Big Island, which was built up and touristy with skyscrapers in the business districts and cruise ships on the horizon, every shop seemingly packed with plastic surfboards and crazily patterned shirts. Hana, by contrast, had a unique calm that was almost spiritual. Tess loved the smell of the frangipani and rain–scented breeze as they took a ten–minute trip around narrow, mango–strewn lanes into the small town.

They pulled up in front of a one–storey oriental–styled house with emerald green lawns that sloped down to the ocean. Inside it was like a Thai boutique hotel, with maple floors, ceiling fans, and grey, cream, and charcoal minimalist furnishings. She walked out onto the
lanai
– the terrace at the back – and saw a black marble infinity pool stretching out in front of her. In New York she was sometimes intimidated by the luxury: the museum–quality splendour of Belcourt, or Meredith’s chilly Upper East Side WASP palace. But here, she felt as if she could lie down on one of the ivory sofas by the pool, drink in the views, and feel entirely at home.

‘Who
owns
this place?’ she asked Sean, who had already changed into khaki shorts and a white T–shirt. He grinned.

‘Chris Kennedy.’

‘The rock star?’

Sean nodded. ‘I’ve known Chris for years – well, before the band got really famous. Lots of musicians live around here actually. George Harrison used to have an estate down the road.’

‘Blimey,’ said Tess, looking at the house in a different light now she knew it was owned by a celebrity. Still, there was no harm in enjoying the luxury while she was here, was there?

‘Mind if I take a dip in the pool?’ she asked.

‘Oh no,’ said Sean. ‘Grab your bikini, I can think of somewhere better to swim than here.’

‘Better than
here
?’ she said suspiciously.

‘Trust me.’

They got back in the Jeep and drove back towards the tiny village, turning off down a bumpy road behind the one–room schoolhouse, finally coming to a dusty dead end where Sean parked and jumped out.

‘Come on!’ he grinned, heading for a hole in a barbed–wire fence.

‘Where exactly are we going?’ said Tess.

‘Off–piste,’ called Sean as he disappeared through the hole. She followed him through and down a trail heading towards the jagged cliffs. They were surrounded by lush forest on all sides. Flowers on the trees were the bold red of traffic lights, the ripe mangos were as shiny as topaz; it was a picture–book Garden of Eden – apart from the fact that Tess felt the loose earth of the path might fall away into the sea at any moment. They slowly edged along a dusty and treacherous path that clung to the side of a cliff–face, at one point even having to double back where the trail disappeared into the sea from a landslide.

As they walked, Sean began to open up to Tess, and she learnt the real stories behind some of the things she had read or heard about him. Yes, he had been expelled from his exclusive prep school, but he had been dyslexic. ‘Couldn’t make sense of all those jumbled letters,’ he smiled. Relegated to the bottom stream, he became frustrated, which led to ‘high jinks’ to keep himself amused. ‘They didn’t really go for high jinks at my school,’ said Sean. ‘They suggested I might be happier elsewhere.’

Tess laughed. ‘And to think I thought you were just a trouble–maker. It just goes to show that behind every story is another more interesting story. My first editor always used to tell me that.’

‘Well, he was right about that,’ said Sean, ‘certainly when it comes to my life.’

Just then, Tess slipped on a loose rock and fell sideways. Sean’s hand shot out to grab her and they both sat down on the path with a bump. They exchanged a look of alarm, then both cracked up laughing. ‘Come on,’ said Tess, as she dusted herself off and sat down on a large rock.

‘What exactly am I risking my neck for?’

‘We’re going to the Secret Beach,’ said Sean as he sat down next to her.

‘Secret beach?’ she repeated with wonder, ‘How come you know this island so well?’

Sean sighed. ‘Ah well, that’s another of your “hidden stories”. Do you remember after the Venus party, my mother checked me into a rehab facility in Minnesota?’

She nodded. Meredith had told her.

‘Well, I lasted ten days. There were some seriously fucked people there and it made me feel worse. It wasn’t that I didn’t agree with what they were saying at the clinic, I just didn’t like the way they went about it,’ said Sean. ‘All that public confession, it’s not what I was brought up to do. The Asgills deal with their problems within the family, I’m sure you’re up to speed on that?’