Read Our Lady of the Islands Online
Authors: Shannon Page,Jay Lake
Her mind — and something more, something visceral — crawled through the ruined body, half pushing, half dragged along through organs reduced to clotted cheese, by poison. Someone had poisoned him, slowly over time, though she was too far gone herself now to reveal the fact aloud. There was scarcely any tissue left inside him not half disintegrated, by the toxins he’d been fed, or by those his body’s failing parts themselves had emptied into him as they’d begun to rot. Oddly, there was very little pain. He had almost no sense of feeling left, anywhere inside him, thus, neither did Sian. Yet he wasn’t dead. Still. Sian had heard other tales of people who woke up inside their tombs and coffins. After having been in what they called a deathsleep for too long, easily mistaken for death itself.
She felt the boy’s deathsleep disturbed now, sensed him being pried, against his will, back into consciousness. He had been ready, long ago, to set life down. Had navigated that surrender once, and wanted to go through none of it a second time. This felt … like a violation of some kind, as he began to breathe. And choke. As feeling started to return before the pain had fully vanished. Now she heard him crying out, somewhere far away, and would have moaned along with him, if she’d had any strength or voice for it. She had gone too deeply down into the well from which she’d drawn him. They had barely felt each other as they’d passed, in opposite directions.
She heard Konrad scream, more faintly still, as she began to fray. Into a thousand shards of light and memory. There had been daughters. Going. Lovers. Past. Parents. Places. All becoming flat now. Paintings. Icons. Mere … ideas.
Nothing to fear. Nothing to feel.
Nothing.
Sian Kattë.
She knew the name. And didn’t want it anymore.
Sian Kattë. I’m sorry.
No. NO. I don’t want to go.
The time will come. But this is not that day. Too many need you still.
Please. She would have wept if she’d known how to anymore. She would have begged. But there was none of that here either. Though there was much more here to be. So much more to know. Everything. Ahead of her. And she was not to be allowed it. Please.
There is one choice, before you go, but not that one, child. I’m sorry.
But … I am done with choices. PLEASE.
This is the moment, if you wish it. Choose.
The question was implacable. The choice inevitable. When this moment passed — here, where she was finally to have been free of moments too — it would be made. One way or the other.
Very well. She chose. And felt the tug. The dull cement of time and being. And remembered what it was to grieve.
The air smelled of flowers.
The scent had a name.
The same name as the flowers. But she could not remember it.
There were other scents as well.
Clean linen.
Salt air.
… Beeswax. On teakwood.
Curry … very faintly, and … onions … cooking …
Lavender.
That was what the flower — and the scent — were called.
She heard something piping in the distance, high and shrill. A bird. She could see it in her mind. White and slender against the sunlit blue. Small and lean and graceful.
Tern.
The names of so many things were coming back. Hibiscus. Egret. Palm frond. Sail … Boat. Dragonfly. Plumeria … Sand. Seashell. Coral … Gecko … Ocean …
Silk.
Her eyes opened to find dark, slender fingers. On white linen dappled with sunlight. Beyond them, gauzy curtains billowed languidly before a bank of open windows. Framed in teak. Filled with turquoise light. She heard the sea somewhere. Foliage rustling in the breeze.
The fingers moved. Her fingers. She’d known that, but … it still seemed strange somehow. Not to be assumed. She wanted them to wiggle — and they did. It was … amusing.
“Did I just see her move?”
“Let’s see if she is waking finally, yes?”
She wished to see who’d spoken. And her body turned. As slowly as …
molasses
. Sweet and dark.
Molasses.
She found a kindly face above her, not young, but smiling slightly. Thatched in thinning, light brown hair. His robe was rough and dark. Not
silk
. She knew what the robe was made of, but couldn’t pull the word into focus. Yet. This face had a name she did know. “Het.”
The word made so little sound, she wasn’t sure she’d really said it until his smile widened with his eyes. “Ah! You
are
awake, Sian! How are you feeling?”
Sian.
Yes. She knew that name too; reclaimed it, almost without effort. How was she feeling?
That was far too large a question. Much too hard to parse. She set it down again.
In a chair, well behind Het, by a table set with cups of …
kava
— that name made her smile inside — sat another man, much younger. Lean and, somehow sad, though he smiled too as he got up to come join Het. His robe was just as rough and plain, but if there was a name for his face too, she couldn’t find it.
“Welcome back, Our Lady,” said this younger face as it arrived beside her bed.
No.
A
bed. But not
hers
. She felt quite certain of this, though she could not recall
her
bed, exactly. If there’d ever been one. This bed was where the smell of lavender came from. There was … lavender inside it somewhere. And in …
vases
… set on tables at its sides. “Where is this?” Her voice seemed far less easily commanded than her fingers had been.
“You are in the summer house of Korlan Alkattha, the late Factor’s father,” Het said. “On the eastern shore of Home. Does that … make any sense to you?”
She gazed up at him, and shook her head, understanding
summer
, and
house
, and …
father
. But little of the rest. “What is a
late factor
?”
The smiles above her faltered slightly. Het drew a breath and sighed. “I have had to give you medicines that may dull your memory a bit, but it will all come back to you in time, my dear. You are safe, and loved here. Just relax and let us care for you. Do you want something to eat? Something light, yes? A bowl of fish broth?
Fish
… She knew that name as well. The faint scents of curry and cooking onion recaptured her attention. “May I have …” There was a name. A delicious word. “
Bouillabaisse
?”
The smiles above her flared back into being.
“I suspect Korlan’s kitchen is equipped to supply that too,” said Het. “Though I must caution you to reconsider, yes? You have eaten nothing solid for four days now. Your stomach may not know quite what to do with bouillabaisse just yet.”
“Days?” Sian knew what the word meant. The number, though, seemed … strangely out of focus. What was
four
days? How long was that? “Four days?” she asked again.
“Yes, Sian,” said Het, no longer smiling. “You nearly died when you healed Konrad. The Factora summoned me, and had you brought here to recover.” Het paused, as if expecting some response, but his words were tugging at something still without names, deep inside her. Not very pleasantly. Her attention had all shifted there.
The kindly man glanced back at his younger companion, who leaned forward and asked, “Do you remember healing Konrad?”
Healing Konrad
… These words meant … something … urgent.
Healing Konrad.
HEALING KONRAD! Everything came back at once. She sat up — or tried to, but collapsed again immediately, exhausted, and
sore
. In so many places. She felt faint. She’d been in Arian’s bedchamber at the Factorate — only minutes earlier. How had she … “
Four days?
” she said again. “Did Konrad … Is he —”
“Quite alive, and recovering with
unnatural
speed, my lady,” Het informed her. “You are remembering, yes? I did not mean to shock you.”
“I remember. But …” Four days. She had missed four days. The summer house … of Viktor’s father. “Where is the Factora-Consort? Is she here as well?”
“She is. And Konrad too. This house is functioning as temporary quarters for her new government. She is the Factora now, by unanimous consent of all the other ruling families — even House Orlon — and confirmed by popular demand of Alizar’s electorate.”
“Factora?” Sian asked, astonished. She had never heard the term without its suffix.
Het nodded. “She was understandably reluctant, at first. Not just unimaginably weary, I am sure, of all this nation’s woes have already cost her, but worried too that no one would support a woman as Factor, much less a foreign-born one. But … there has never been so much support for any ruler here. Not since the rebellion, anyway. And I believe her connection to you may have something to do with that — though by no means all.”
“To me?”
“You are quite a hero now, Our Lady,” said the younger man, whom she knew as well now. The priest of the Butchered God. “Though you may have stretched even the god’s power a bit thin back at the Factorate.”
“House Alkattha is, of course, extremely grateful to you,” said Het. “For reviving their heir to the Factorate, and restoring their place in the nation’s political future. You may ask them — or a great many other people of importance here in Alizar — for nearly anything you wish now, and count on them to listen, I believe.”
“What of Arian’s brother?” Hero or not, the memory of what she’d done to him came back with a chill of shame. “Is he … recovered?”
“He is safely in our care at the temple,” Het replied. “Under lock and key, of course, though in far nicer quarters than you were accorded there. Due to his condition, it is still unclear whether he or the former Census Taker was more at fault for this national calamity. But we will help him find himself again, and doubtless have it sorted out in time.”
“Aros … was part of the conspiracy too?” Sian could hardly believe that Arian and Viktor had been betrayed by so many members of their own family.
“One of its architects, it seems,” said Het. “Hivat has uncovered a great deal of unpleasantness since their coup attempt disintegrated. But the Factora’s brother seems to have been under the impression that if the Factor’s sole heir died without hope of replacement, he would be next in line for ascension to the Factor’s seat, once Viktor and Arian were also dead.”
“But … that’s ridiculous,” said Sian. “The people would never have affirmed his claim. He’s not even Alizari. The other houses would just have installed some new Factor of their own. Can he have failed to understand that?”
“Not if he could count on their support,” Het interjected. “He made a lot of shockingly generous promises, it seems, to a lot of sadly ambitious and receptive people — some of them in my own temple. Which is how he came to the attention of the Census Taker. After that, it’s anybody’s guess, at this point, which of them was really in control.”
At his mention of the temple, she had gone cold inside. “I am a hero now?” she asked.
“To say the least,” said Het. “A national treasure, I would say.”
“Then … I have no further need to fear arrest?”
Het laughed, as did the young priest at his side. It was so strange, she realized, to see them standing there — together. “My dear!” Het beamed at her. “The world has changed a great deal since you left us. You would have no cause for worry now, even if the Mishrah-Khote’s new Father Superior were not so favorably disposed toward you.”
“Duon … is no longer in power?”
Het’s smile vanished. “He now enjoys the very same hospitality to which you were treated — though we have no intention of trying to starve him. If he can stomach skate fin soup.”
“Duon has been
arrested
?” Sian said, incredulous.
“And Lod, and all the other toadies who supported what he stood for. If their so-called leadership these many years had not been sufficient to condemn them, their conduct in response to our very civil request for changes most certainly proved the criminal nature of their characters. I am profoundly sorry that it cost the rest of Alizar so many lives. We didn’t know that someone was about to overthrow the Factorate as well, or we’d have delayed our own uprising for another week or two.”
“In just four days.” Sian shook her head. “I’ve … missed so much.”
“Ha!” Het looked more amused than ever. “My dear, you were at the very center of most of it. And hardly eager for any extra helpings, as I recall.”
“So who is the new Father Superior?”
“Well … I am.” Het offered her a small, self-deprecating smile. “I too have benefitted from my now quite open connection to you.”
“That was hardly the only reason,” said the younger priest. “With all respect to you, Our Lady,” he added hastily.
“You … rule the Mishrah-Khote now?” she asked, beginning to wonder if she’d really woken yet at all. “You told me you were regarded as a disgrace there.”
“By all the right people,” Het answered. “Or the wrong ones, depending on the frame one chooses, yes? Let’s just say, their disapproval was another of my stronger qualifications. And, no. The Mishrah-Khote is done with rulers, I believe. If I have any say, at least. I
guide
the temple now. As they will doubtless guide me in
our
pursuit of truth. No one rules it but the gods.”
“So … no one at the temple minds now, that you’re here rubbing shoulders with a notorious spiritual fraud and the Butchered God’s fugitive priest?” she pressed.
“Sian,” Het said soberly. “Events have rather settled all those accusations in your favor. Yours, and this courageous young man’s. The temple clearly has much to learn from both of you, and many others on these islands, disregarded or suppressed by the previous regime. I don’t suppose you might be interested in … being anointed as a healer, would you?”
“You’re … offering to make me a
priest
?” She was almost certain she was meant to laugh. Even now. But he only nodded, without so much as a grin. “A
female
priest. The temple would stand for that?”
He nodded yet again. Quite soberly. “Now, at last, they would, I think.”
After gaping at him for a moment, she shook her head. “I’m sorry. But I really cannot see myself …” She trailed off, disturbed by some … half-formed fragment of a memory. Which vanished instantly upon pursuit. “I cannot imagine being happy as some temple mystic, Father Het. Though I am … honored — and utterly astonished — by the invitation.”
Het sighed. “I did not think so, but … I had to ask.”
“The world I left is gone indeed.” Sian looked up at the Butchered God’s young priest. “Will
you
join the Mishrah-Khote now?”
“Oh no,” he said, as if she must be teasing him. “I am hardly any kind of healer — as you would know better than most. Nor have I any real calling as a priest. I’ve just been a tool, however willing or unwilling in the moment.”
“What makes that different from a priest?” Het asked. “I could say the same of myself.”
“Well, it hardly matters now,” the young priest sighed. “This god I’ve served has come for just one reason I’m aware of: to make the world new. And now … it is. Or seems to be.” He shrugged, not so much at them as to himself. “I’m not sure he’ll stay now. I’m not sure he hasn’t left already.” He look up from his private reverie. “I may be in need of some whole new identity. But not as a priest. The Butchered God has no interest in religions, I don’t think.” He shook his head. “Not that he ever said as much to me. But I have … carried him inside me now for long enough; been shaped enough by the visions he dispensed, that I cannot imagine he’d be pleased by any temple, or any list of rules to which his followers were all coerced. His nature seems … entirely about movement. Change. Breaking and renewal. Even those would become rigid expectations once they were codified. How does one
establish
a religion around that?”
“Your followers will try,” said Het. “As all followers do.”