Outbreak: Boston (30 page)

“My God!” she said quietly as she dropped everything she was carrying. “Come here, you poor boy. Let me see to that eye.” Casey took him by the sleeve and led him towards the cafeteria. “What happened to you?”

Adam looked nervously at the floor then the walls as his mouth opened and closed a few times. “I slipped. Hit my face.” he said quietly. He sighed and jammed his hands in his pockets.

Casey felt her heart sink into the pit of her stomach. She had heard that excuse and seen those mannerisms before when she had done volunteer work at a home for abused children.

Once they were in the kitchen with a bag of frozen peas pressed over Lacey’s eye she put a hand on the young man’s shoulder. “Okay, who hit you Adam?” the older woman asked sternly.

The man sighed and frowned bitterly. “Frays did.” He smiled a little and snorted. “I can’t say I didn’t deserve it.” Lacey hid his face in his hands and started taking deep breaths, finding himself on the verge of tears again
and hating himself for it. Casey put her arms around the young man and held him, making him think of when he was a little boy and he had fallen off his bike or something. His grandmother had tried her best to fill in for the mother he had never known, but by the time he was fourteen he and his grandpa taking care of her. Between her bad heart and the Early Onset Alzheimer’s Gramma Lacey was out of his life by his fifteenth birthday. By the time he finished high school he was all alone in the world, as far as he was concerned. It all came pouring out: the checkpoint, the fight, the guilt, the fear, everything.

“Listen, Adam.” Casey said at last. She released the young man and held him at arm’s length. “I think I might have an idea on how to take a step in the direction of fixing this. You just leave it to me and stay away from Frays for right now, okay? We don’t want her to black your other eye, right?”

After Lacey had run from the room Frays threw herself down on the couch and stared at the ceiling. She had tried to read a little of one of the books Adam had brought but ended up throwing it to the floor. After the initial fury had subsided Frays just felt so…drained, like she did not really have the energy for anything. She wrapped herself up in her blanket and slept like a rock for almost two and a half hours. “I might have to punch Lacey more often.” Frays muttered aloud when she looked at her watch. She frowned guiltily at the ceiling, trying to convince herself that she had not really crossed that line. The skinned knuckles on her right hand proved otherwise: she really had finally lost her temper so badly that she had hurt someone.

Frays groaned and stretched then propped herself up on her elbow. She looked at the blank television screen for a moment and decided against trying to turn it on.
A horrid feeling of shameful self-reproach roiled in her belly, adding to the anxiety already there.

Amy stood up and decided to do some PT instead to burn off a little energy. She did pushups, sit ups and calisthenics until she reached muscle failure. Once she could scrape herself up off the floor Frays went into the little latrine in the corner of the room and washed herself off in the sink as best she could.

She could hear someone talking just outside the door as she pulled on her undershirt and tucked it into her trousers, the door to the hallway opening as she came out. “Hi, Casey.” Frays said with a halfhearted smile. “What’s shakin’?”

The older woman held up an MRE and a battered Holy Bible. “Thought you might want a little food.” Casey said as she tossed the plastic bag to Amy. “Also, it’s Friday. Since you can’t come to Bible study tonight, I thought you might like to talk a little.”

“Sure, thanks.” Amy said quietly as she motioned to the table. Frays eyed the writing on the MRE’s package and somehow managed to not groan aloud. “Awww yeah! Bean Burrito!” she said as she tore open the bag and started dumped its contents out on the table. Amy frowned as she turned around to take the entrée and its heating element to the tap to get it started warming up.

Frays found that she was ravenous, as always, even though she knew that she would be spending the next hour on the pot. She jammed the foil packet of white rice between her thigh and the chair to warm it then tore open the packet labeled fruit cocktail. “So, what did you have in mind?” Amy asked after she had wolfed down the fruit portion and
stuffed the empty foil envelope back in the bag before starting in on the bean burrito.

Casey’s face was impassive as she leafed through the
dog eared pages of the Bible. “Here we are. ‘Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.’ Ephesians 4:31-32.”

Amy frowned and wiped her mouth with the tissue from the MRE’s condiment packet. “He talked to you didn’t he?” she asked darkly. Frays leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms over her stomach, the food before her suddenly forgotten despite the protests of her belly.

Casey looked at the young woman across the table from her and sighed. “He really is sorry, Amy.” she said quietly. There was a long quiet moment between them. “Like it or not, your opinion of that young man matters a lot to him. I don’t know if he could bear you staying mad at him.”

“Well what about me, huh?” Frays asked resentfully. She rubbed at something next to her eye and shook her head, her hands suddenly trembling. “I almost got
eaten alive
yesterday and then he comes in here and drops that in my lap? I haven’t been able to have a good night’s sleep since that day because of him. Every time I close my eyes I see my friends dying. I see bodies floating in the water. I hear people screaming…” Amy started picking at the food on the foil packet on the table. “I can only forgive so much, Casey. I mean…I’m only human.”

“I’m not saying you have to forgive him.” Casey said quietly. She came around the table and put a hand on the woman’s shoulder. “I’d just like you to try. The two of you were such…good friends.”

Frays caught a glimpse of something odd in Casey’s eye. “Not you too!” she muttered. A frustrated chuckle escaped her lips as she hid her face in her hands for a second. “Look, he’s married! I don’t know who started these rumors, but I say again I am not sleeping with him or anybody else here.” Amy shook her head angrily and pressed her face into her palms, elbows resting on the table. “I don’t need to put up with this crap again.” she grumbled under her breath.

“Again?” Casey asked, suddenly curious. “What do you mean?”

Frays looked like she wished she had kept her mouth shut. She rolled her eyes and jumped to her feet, crossing the room to lean against the wall next to the battered lockers. “Just about everybody in my squadron thought I was sleeping with my flight sergeant.” Amy grumbled, clearly upset. The young woman crossed her arms over her stomach and stared at her lap. “I wasn’t. I-I couldn’t. He was married and…I mean…” Frays pinched the bridge of her nose with her right hand, her mouth scrunching into a thin line. “I’m…er was…” Amy took a deep breath and shuddered as she let it out; barely holding back tears “friends with his wife. She worked at this Air Force research lab and was going to help me get a job there when I got done with school. While we were on deployment his son’s elementary school class sent us letters and stuff. His daughter set up a box at work to collect donations to send us care packages. They let us stay in their house on post so we didn’t have to sleep in the barracks when we had drill. He was the most honest, decent, honorable man I’ve ever met. I mean, neither one of us could have ever looked Maria in the eye again if we had.”

Casey smiled and
went across the room where she sat on a table in front of the younger woman. “I can see where that would get annoying.” the older woman said warmly. “Would you like me to bring Adam by later? How does about noon sound?”

Amy frowned at the remains of the MRE on the table
on the other side of the room. “Can I do anything to stop you?”

Frays and Lacey sat next to each other at the table in the teacher’s lounge
that afternoon. Amy scowled at the floor near Casey’s feet with her arms crossed across her stomach, drumming her fingers on her bicep. Lacey looked at the floor too, but his left eye was nearly swollen shut. His hands dangled between his legs as he leaned forward resting his forearms on his thighs.

Casey sat across from the two of them. There was an uncomfortable silence that filled the room. She was so far out of her league on this one that it was not even funny. Casey was used to dealing with marital disputes, family problems…not mass murder
or anything like this.             

“He killed my friend.” Frays spat suddenly. She hugged herself and shivered. “He killed Jacobson. He…drowned like a rat in a trap because of you.” One trembling hand took a cigarette out of her pack and lit it. She only had four left. “How on earth do you think you can just
apologize
for something like that?”

Lacey tried to put a hand on Frays’ shoulder but she scooted out of reach. The man’s face twisted up in rage as he pulled his hand back. “Fine, be that way you self righteous bitch.” Adam grumbled heatedly, his hands clenching into fists. “I wish I was perfect like you. I mean, shit, it was my first time getting called up and I gotta deal with THIS? Jesus Fucking Christ, Frays.” He jabbed an accusatory finger at her face as he spoke. “My wife and kids could be FUCKING DEAD right now. My friends? DEAD. My neighbors? DEAD.” Adam was on his feet, glowering over the woman seated next to him.

“You’re the closest thing I have to a friend right now and I’m sorry for what I did and I’d trade places with your friends if I could.” Casey was relieved when Adam returned to his chair and sat back down in his chair. The man resumed scowling at the floor. Lacey turned back to the woman seated next to him. “I saved your ASS at least TWICE since this thing started so if that hasn’t earned me a little bit of consideration then you can FUCK OFF!”

The two women looked pitiably at the man. “I’m sorry I hit you.” Amy said at last. She exhaled a plume of smoke into the air and blinked back tears. “It’s…just…I dunno...” a tremor ran through her body and she took a couple deep breaths “He was right there one minute and…gone the next. And Jacobson…he was screaming. There was blood
everywhere
. I tried to get him out but he was
stuck
and we fell in the river. I told him me and Sergeant Emery would look after him and he
died
. They both died and I can’t make any
sense
of it.” Amy bitterly shook her head and wiped at a tear on her cheek “I can’t make sense out of any of this. I mean…I kept thinking that this was all just some…horrible nightmare and I was gonna wake up. I’d be in my bed at school or on my parents’ couch…and I’d wake up. I’d wake up and everything would be okay again.”

Casey felt a little smile creeping onto her face. The three of them had been sitting here for an hour before the two of them had even looked at each other. “Okay, I think that’s enough for right now.” she said quietly as she stood up. Lacey and Frays both looked at each other for a second before Adam stood up.

“I-I’ll be around if you want to talk more.” Lacey said quietly. He looked like he was going to put a hand on Frays’ shoulder but thought better of it and let it hang at his side. “Just ask.”

Amy frowned at the table. “Maybe.” she said quietly. Frays sighed and shook her head. “Look…just don’t push, alright? Everything’s gotten all turned upside down and sideways on me over the last couple days…” Her voice trailed off for a moment but she shook herself out of it “Let me try and work some of this stuff out on my own, okay?”

Sometime after Casey and Adam had left, Amy still sat at the table with her head in her hands. A cigarette burned indolently between the fingers of her left hand. Her mouth trembled in her palms as she thought about that day and everything that followed. The night before she had to report to Hanscomb for deployment overseas the entire family went out to dinner at her favorite restaurant for a combination farewell/birthday dinner because she would turn twenty in Iraq. When the manager found out he came out to shake her hand, wish her good luck and tell her that the entire family’s meal was on the house. Amy had been kind of embarrassed when Mom started to cry
again.

She had gone to the bathroom and come out to find Dad waiting for her. He gave her a big hug, which was sort of unusual for him. “You’re probably gonna see some horrible things over there, kiddo.” he whispered in her ear as he held his daughter “Just put it all in a box in your head and put the box on a shelf in a closet so you can do your job and deal with it later.”

Amy sighed and finished her cigarette, the butt hissing in the water when she stuffed it into the can at her elbow.
I think the box is getting a little full, Dad
she thought as she went to the couch and lay down. She folded her hands behind her head and stared up at the ceiling, lost in thought. She was fine, so why did her friends lock her up in here? A horrid thought crept slowly into her mind: that Sergeant Williams, the man at the supply point had not actually been sick at all. That she had scared him when she entered the trailer. That she had committed murder. Amy felt sick to her stomach as she considered the idea.

Who am I to judge Lacey?
Amy thought guiltily. Her mind wandered back to those Army privates, who she might have robbed of their NCO at a time when they needed him most.
No, no…he was…sick
she told herself, remembering the crazed look in the man’s eyes as he stood in the doorway seconds before she had put a round through his forehead. She hoped that those three men had made it out of the city alright. She rolled onto her side and pulled her blanket over her face, weeping bitterly when she realized that if they did not their deaths were on her head too.