Over You (2 page)

I knew it
, Jessica thought in bitter triumph.

“But we’re just good friends. Nothing more.”

“How can you expect me to believe you when you lied about when you first saw her?”

Alex shook his head. “See what I mean? There you go, jumping to conclusions.”

“If you weren’t doing anything wrong, why did you find it necessary to lie to me about seeing her in the first place?”
 

“Why are we even talking about this? We should be talking about our future together. That’s what’s really important.”

Jessica paused, considering his words for a moment, but then a thought came to her. “Alex, it seems to me that you really like this other woman.” Ignoring the sharp pain that those words brought to her heart, she continued. “If that’s true, then we don’t have a future. If you want to be with her, why are you wasting my time and yours, being with me?”

He frowned as he seemed to ponder her question. “As long as I’m being honest, I might as well tell you something. I do like Mikayla. I’ve had feelings for her since college. But nothing is going to come of it. I’ve had to move past it. I’m with you now, Jessica. You are the one I want to be with.”

Shocked to hear his admission, Jessica didn’t know what to say for a moment. Finally, she asked, “If you have feelings for her, what makes you so sure nothing will come of it? What assurances do I have that you won’t decide to act on those feelings and leave me?”

“Because,” Alex started, then stopped. He looked at his lap, then lifted his gaze to meet Jessica’s. “Because she’s married.”

“Married? And you were kissing her?” Startled by this revelation, Jessica was even more certain that she could never trust him. “So I suppose if she were to become available, you’d be the first in line to comfort her, right?”

He shook his head. “Not if I’m with you.”

“I’m sorry, Alex, but at this point any trust I may have had in you is gone.” The shock of the conversation numbed her feelings, allowing her to remain calm.

“Look, I know I made a mistake taking her to dinner. I let things get out of control. I never should have done more than say hello at the office. But I’ve learned my lesson. It won’t ever happen again. I promise. It’s you that I love, Jessica.”

Jessica shook her head. The damage had been done. She knew it was time to move on, and now she just wanted to get back to the sanctuary of her little apartment as soon as she could so she could mourn in private.
 

The waitress appeared at the table, their food in her hands. An awkward silence ensued as they both waited for her to finish setting their dishes in front of them. The waitress left, and Jessica stared at the steaming bowl of soup, her appetite non-existent.
 

Alex picked up his fork and began eating his meal.

“I really need to get back to work.” Jessica set her napkin on the table and lifted her purse from the back of her chair.

“So we’re good, right?” Alex took a large bite of his pasta salad.

She stared at him, stunned that he would believe things were possibly anywhere in the realm of good. “You’re kidding, right?”

He set his fork down. “No, of course not. Don’t you believe me when I say I made a mistake, and that it won’t happen again?”

“Oh, I know you made a mistake.” Jessica held her purse in her lap, ready to bolt as soon as she could. “But that doesn’t make everything okay. We’re done, Alex.” She stood, thinking that would convey the finality of her words.

He jumped up and came towards her. “Please, Jessica. Don’t do this. You’re making a mistake.”

Putting her purse over her shoulder, she put her hands out to stop his approach. “No, the mistake would be staying with you when I can’t trust if you’ll be faithful.” She paused, watching the words sink in. When it seemed he was finally getting it, she said, “Good bye, Alex.” Then she turned and walked out of the restaurant, and to her car.

As she slid behind the wheel she looked over her shoulder to make sure he hadn’t followed her. Relieved that he hadn’t, she felt tears form in her eyes as she pictured the fun times the two of them had enjoyed together. Forcing those thoughts away, she wiped at her eyes and started her car. Heading home, she wondered how she was going to tell her parents she’d broken up with Alex, the man they had hoped would become the son they’d never had.

Chapter Two

Once home, Jessica worked on her programming project, but found her mind turning to Alex and her now broken future. This all feels so familiar, she thought, remembering past relationships. Am I ever going to find happiness, or am I destined to pick the wrong man, time after time?

Despite the dispiriting direction her mind insisted on following, she managed to get some work done before it was time to go to her parents’ house for dinner. When she pulled up in front of her childhood home, she braced herself for the disappointment her parents were sure to have over her break-up with Alex. As Jessica walked in the house, wonderful smells wafted toward her and she felt her stomach rumble. She hadn’t eaten since breakfast and was now famished.

“Mom?” she called out, not seeing anyone in the living room.

“In here,” a voice answered from the kitchen.

Forcing a smile, Jessica went toward the familiar room and found her mother putting the finishing touches on a green salad. “Hi, Mom.” Jessica hugged her mother. “Where’s Dad? I didn’t see him when I came in.”

“Oh, he must be upstairs. He got home from work late and wanted to put on something more casual.”

“How was your day?” Jessica asked.
 

“Not bad. I signed a new client today. A family selling their house. And they were willing to price it to sell, so I’m hopeful it won’t sit on the market too long.”

“Yeah, this is definitely a buyer’s market.”

Jessica’s mother nodded as she carried the salad to the table in the adjacent dining room. “Can you grab the rolls? Then I think we’ll be ready to eat.”

A few minutes later Jessica sat at the dining room table with her parents. She didn’t look forward to telling them she had broken up with Alex and hoped she could put it off. As the main meal came to a close she began to think she might be able to get through the evening without mentioning it, but then as her mother set dessert on the table, her father asked the dreaded question.

“So Jessica, what’s going on with you and Alex? Has he brought up the ‘M’ word yet?”

“Now, Jack. I don’t think Jessica needs any more pressure.”

Jessica smiled at her mom, thankful for her intervention.

“I’m her father. It’s my job to ask these things.”

Deciding to get it over with, Jessica turned to her dad. “I have some bad news.”

“What?” her mom asked, alarm in her voice.

“I broke up with Alex today.”

“Why?” her mom asked.

Jessica hadn’t finished processing her conversation with Alex yet, and didn’t want to tell her parents all the gory details. “I don’t really want to get into it, but I decided it wasn’t going to work out.”

“Oh, Jessica. I’m so sorry to hear that,” her mom said. “It’s too bad though. I thought he was such a good catch.”

“You and me both.” Afraid to say anything that would get her parents digging into the specifics, she left it at that and hoped they would too.

“Are you sure about this, Jessica?” her dad asked.
 

“Let it go, Jack.”

“Come on, Debra. You know you were hoping for grandkids soon.”

Jessica’s mother glanced at Jessica before looking back at her husband. “There’s still time. She’s only twenty-seven. Nowadays a lot of women don’t have their first child until they’re in their thirties or later.”

“But what if she has trouble like you did?” Her father asked. “At least we were able to have her. What if she can’t have children at a later age?”

Jessica sighed. “I’m still here in the room. You know I don’t like when you talk about me like I’m not here.”

“I’m sorry,” they said in unison.

“We’re just disappointed,” her mom said. “We really liked Alex and thought it was going to turn in to something permanent. But all we really want is your happiness. You know that, right?”

Jessica nodded. “Of course I know that. But I really don’t want to talk about it.”

Her mother nodded and started slicing the apple pie. “My sister Ellen called today.” Debra placed a slice of apple pie on each of three plates as she spoke. “She’s just getting over a bad case of the flu and isn’t feeling well. I offered to come out and stay with her, but she wouldn’t hear of it.”
 

Jessica pictured her aunt, with whom she had spent many happy summers, and felt a flash of concern. “Who’s going to take care of her? She doesn’t have any children, and since Uncle Patrick died last year, she has no family around at all. And she’s what—nearly seventy now?”
 

“Yes, but you know how independent she is. And seventy isn’t what it used to be anyway. It’s like the new sixty, right, Jack?”

Jessica’s dad laughed. “If you say so.”

“But if she’s been sick,” Jessica said, letting the sentence trail off as she accepted the plate of pie from her mother. She stared at the plate as an idea filled her mind. She thought about the woman who was like a second mother to her and smiled, certain her idea was a good one. “Maybe she would let me come out and help her.”

“That would be wonderful. I think you should offer,” Debra said. “She’s always adored you so I think she’d accept your offer of help. Maybe you could just propose coming for a visit. Tell her you need a change of scenery or something. Make it seem like she was doing you a favor.”

Jessica smiled, pleased with the idea. “I’ll give her a call when I get home.”
 

When Jessica walked in to her apartment later that evening, exhaustion from the emotional day washed over her, but she didn’t forget about calling Ellen. Though it was starting to get late, she picked up the phone, wanting to get her plans set, if indeed her aunt would allow her to come.
 

After greeting her aunt, who seemed wide awake, Jessica jumped to her idea. “I could really use some time away, Ellen.” As the words left her mouth she realized that she really did want a change of scenery. “I broke up with my boyfriend today and . . .” she swallowed, trying to get the sudden rush of sadness under control. “Well, it would be nice to be somewhere else for a while.”

“Oh, Jessica. I’m so sorry to hear you’re having trouble. You know I’d love to have you come for a visit. What about your job, though?”

“That’s no problem. All my work is done remotely, so it doesn’t matter where I am, as long as there’s an Internet connection. You do have an Internet connection, don’t you?”

“I might live in the middle of nowhere, but I have one of those satellites. So I have good TV shows
and
Internet. I have it all, Jessica. Don’t you worry.”

Jessica smiled despite herself. “One last thing. I have my kitty, Hudson. Is it okay if I bring him along?”

“Of course. Cats love it out here.”

“Great. I have a few things to take care of in the morning, but then I ought to be there sometime tomorrow afternoon.”

Once the arrangements had been made, she called her mother to report that she would be going to her aunt’s house to take care of her, although she was certain her aunt would feel like she was taking care of Jessica.

The phone calls done, she grabbed a notepad and pen, sat on the couch, and started making a list of what she would need to bring. Hudson soon jumped up beside her and rubbed his head against her leg, looking for attention. Jessica obliged, scratching between his ears and under his chin. Hudson rewarded her with loud purring.
 

“Guess what, big guy? We’re going to the country to visit my Aunt Ellen. You’ll love it there. She has a big old house and lots of property where you can run around. But you have to behave yourself and not go too far, or I’ll keep you in the house.”

Chapter Three

It was late afternoon by the time Jessica neared her aunt’s house. It had taken all morning to get a few loads of laundry done, and then pack. After the busy morning and the three hour drive, she was tired but happy to have arrived. Warm feelings washed over her as she pulled in to the gravel road that led to the house. Though she hadn’t been there for several months, Jessica had spent many happy weeks of her childhood with her aunt over summer vacations while her mother worked, and the good feelings she’d had while visiting rushed through her.
 

The house was hidden from view as she began the quarter mile drive past tall trees that lined the private road. The trees suddenly ended, and the house appeared in front of her, looking just as she remembered. White with cheerful red shutters, the outside always felt inviting. Jessica especially loved the over-sized wraparound porch with the wide staircase that led to the bright red front door.

Pulling to a stop, she smiled. “We’re here, big guy.” She reached over to the passenger seat, where Hudson rode in his cat carrier, and opened the latch. The door swung open, and after hesitating for a moment, he climbed onto Jessica’s lap, pressing his nose against the window. “You want out. I know.”

Jessica opened the car door and Hudson leapt to the ground, then he started sniffing the air. Scooping him into her arms, she walked up the stairs and knocked on the front door. Then realizing her aunt might be upstairs or napping, she opened the door and walked in. Hudson squirmed to get down and Jessica set him on the floor. She smiled as she watched him explore the large old house.
 

“Ellen? It’s Jessica. I’m here.”

When there was no answer, she began checking the downstairs. The spacious front room only held her aunt’s antique furniture. “Hello? Aunt Ellen? Are you home?”

Still no answer.

She walked into the adjoining sunroom, but focused on finding her aunt, she didn’t stop to enjoy the warm and inviting room. Hoping her aunt might be in the kitchen, Jessica went there next, but found it vacant.

“I wonder . . . ,” she muttered as she opened the door to the refrigerator. Milk, eggs, and a few other items, but not nearly the amount of food her aunt usually kept in the house. Before leaving the kitchen, she poked her head into the bathroom/laundry room tucked in the back, but her aunt wasn’t there, so she hurried through the large formal dining room and entered the library. Tall bookshelves lined the walls, filled with hundreds of books. Flashing back to summer afternoons curled up on the padded window seat, reading one of her aunt’s many books, Jessica smiled in warm remembrance.