Paradise: The Masters of The Order Novel Two (37 page)

“I don’t deserve her forgiveness.” Jacques’s words slurred.

“Nope,” Teo said.

“Definitely not,” Sabin added.

“Agreed.” Nicolai nodded.

“But I’ll make it right.”

A thick silence settled over the men at the table. They all knew Jacques faced a huge hurtle with Isabella to correct the wrong he’d done to her. No need to say it out loud.

After they’d drained the second bottle of Patron and started on the third, Teo’s date marched up to him and slammed a fist on the table. “Hey. What’s with leaving me alone for over an hour?” She glowered at him.

“Oops. Guess I forgot something,” Teo said, offering nothing more than a dismissive shrug.

The woman looked at Nicolai. He tugged on his tie and looked away.

“You two know each other?” Teo asked, eyeing Nico.

“You might say that,” Nico muttered, obviously disgusted with himself.

Teo’s friend shifted on her heels at the sting of Nicolai’s reaction. “Go fuck yourselves,” she yelled at both of them.

“Ouch,” Teo said, laughing, and ran a hand through his hair. He clearly didn’t give a damn.

Nicolai splayed his elbows over the shiny tabletop and stared at his reflection. He clearly did.

Jacques thought about all the nights he and Nico had spent with random women in this place and felt the same sense of disgust. The thought of returning to the lifestyle he’d led before Isabella made him feel sick. He never wanted to go back, but he didn’t know how to go forward.

“All I want to do is love Isabella, but everything about that terrifies me.”

“She loves you too, brother,” Sabin said, pointing out the obvious.

“And that’s the problem. The way she looks at me, like she thinks I’m indomitable.” Jacques shook his head in disbelief. “The ironic thing is I used to believe I was. Now, I look into her eyes and all I can do is wonder if this will be the day.”

“What day?” Teo asked.

Nicolai answered. “The day when the look changes.”

“You feel that too, Nico?” Jacques asked already knowing, but oddly comforted by the thought.

“
Oui
, every damn day. Julianne’s too good for me,” said his ‘
I’ve got the world on a leash
’ high-society cousin.

Hearing Nico putting himself down shifted Jacques right into big brother mode. “That’s bullshit, Nico, you’re...”

“Shut up, Jacques. It’s your pity party, not mine.”

No way to respond to that slam down except drink.

Another few rounds of tequila.

Another few rounds of talk-to-the-hand for the female, and a few male, hopefuls in the bar.

Another few rounds of dirty jokes and barbs that form the unspoken bonding ritual of men.

Until Jacques banged his head against the back of the banquet and put the elephant right on the table. “How can a guy like me be someone’s father? I’m going to fail.”

No silence this time. Sabin jumped all over that statement. “I’ve worked with you for a decade, dipshit. I’ve never seen you fail at anything. Truth be told, y'all guaranteed your success when you married that pretty lady.”

Sabin was too drunk to lie so he had to believe what he was saying.

Teo shook his head as if he couldn’t believe he was going to join in, but he did. “Man, I’m sorry about that fight in Barcelona. Turns out, I was wrong. You might be alright. I have never, I mean never, ever, seen my baby sister so happy. Even pissed as hell and she’s glowing at how happy you’ve made her. You should have heard her voice when she told me you were married. Most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. I’m gonna write a song about it.”

The wide smile. The raised eyebrows. The shaking head. Now Teo had faith in him too? No way. He was hallucinating.

Then Nicolai hopped on the band wagon. “You want to know something, cousin?”

“Hmm?” Jacques was still lost in dismissing the votes of confidence with thoughts of all the ways he could mess up as a father.

“If it wasn’t for you growing up, I wouldn’t have made it. Life with my father would have crushed me. You saved me, Jacques. You think you won’t be a good father, but I know you will. I know firsthand what it feels like to be the one you love and protect. Believe me when I say this baby is the luckiest baby in the world to have you as a father.”

Jacques smiled, humbled by Nico’s words. God, he loved the man. Always had. Always would.

“Here, here,” Sabin yelled and raised his glass.

Teo banged his hand on the table a few times.

“We support each other. Always have. Always will,” Nicolai parroted the words Jacques had spoken to him when he was struggling to find his way with Julianne. “I’m here for you, your wife and your baby.”

“Me too,” Sabin said.

Teo’s head bobbed up and down. “And me.”

Hello, light bulb
. Even the thought slurred, but that did it. Jacques might fail alone, but he wasn’t alone. Still piss-yourself terrified, but not alone. And he never would be. He had Nicolai and Sabin, even Teo. But most importantly, he had Isabella. Or would have her, after he took his cousin’s advice and got on his knees.

“I’m going to need your help,” Jacques murmured, barely able to believe that he was actually asking for someone’s help. And didn’t that little fact paint a pretty picture. Jerard had never been more right than when he said Jacques’s arrogance knew no limits.

The immediate teasing told him his expression must have exposed the seismic wave of self-doubt that churned in his gut. Sabin and Teo wouldn’t stand for it.

“What was I saying about you being a dipshit?” Sabin began. “You’ve had my help all along whether you asked or not, brother.”

“All part of being an uncle.” Teo winked at him. “Do you want to hold hands too?”

“Don’t forget our
mamacita
, Jacques. What d’ya say I help by letting the little woman enjoy a bit of southern hospitality?” No missing the implication in those words.

Teo’s playful expression turned lethal at Sabin’s all too eager one.

When Jacques didn’t answer, Sabin actually said, “Come on. Please.” He had it bad for Isabella.

“And I thought we were going to be friends. How silly of me.” Teo cracked his knuckles.

Nicolai’s reaction didn’t match the others. His head bowed and the voice was barely a whisper. “Anything, Jacques. Always.”

Of the two, Jacques always played the protective role. Guess it meant a lot that he was asking Nico to do it for once.

“Same goes for you, cousin.” Jacques embraced Nicolai hard, holding on for a few seconds, then broke the seriousness with a tickle under Nico’s chin. “Coochy-coo.”

Nico’s fist landed in his gut and knocked the wind out of his lungs. Sabin and Nicolai laughed as Jacques doubled over, gulping for air and choking on his own laughter. As soon as he sat up, Teo punched him again.

“What the hell was that for?”

Teo grinned. “Sorry, couldn’t resist.”

“You better man up, Jacques, or that pretty lady might just leave you standing at the altar. Ya never know who might take your place,” Sabin said, obviously referring to himself.

“You can dream, hayseed. She’s mine and in two weeks, I’m going marry her in front of the whole world.”

“I never thought I’d see the day,” Sabin joked.

“And I can’t believe the bastard beat me to the altar,” Nicolai chimed in.

“Jealous, are we?” Jacques quipped and struck a peacock pose.

Sabin’s hand reached around Nico, practically knocking his face into the marble tabletop, and clapped down on Jacques’s back. “Damn straight.”

“Damn delighted is more like it,” Nicolai said as he shoved Sabin’s arm away. “I’m so happy for you, cousin. You deserve her.”

“I don’t, but if she’s stupid enough to want me, I’m not fool enough to push her away,” Jacques said, dropping a loose arm around Nicolai’s neck. “If Ishabeella tries to run before I get to the altar, you tie her there, ‘kay.” He tried to point a finger into Nico’s chest and missed.

His cousin sat back with a lascivious grin plastered across his face.

“Bride fantasies?”

“Major bride fantasies. Think we can get her to wear a black wedding dress?”

“With a leather bustier,” Sabin mused.

“And a red blindfold,” Jacques sniggered.

“No, no and no!” Teo shot each of them a murderous look.

Jacques put his head on Teo’s shoulder and said, “You sshhhaid it yourself, brother. You’re sssstuck with me for the resssst of your life.”

“Christ, what have I done?” Teo’s head hit the table with a thud.

*****

A sound downstairs woke her. Isabella looked at the clock.

4:00 a.m. Hell cometh early.

She got up and grabbed her robe. As she walked past the spare bedroom next to hers, the sweet thought came into her mind again. Would they paint it blue or pink? The dream was immediately soured with the thought that her missing husband hated the idea. Pulling the belt of her robe tight around her waist, she marched toward the stairs.

“SSSSHHHH. You’re gonna wake her up,
pendejo
.”

“You ‘ssshhh’ and stop calling me asshole.”

“Never.”

A loud screech cut through the apartment.

Isabella stepped into the foyer to find her husband and her brother, arm in arm, scrabbling off the center table that they’d left far from center. They were cracking up and holding onto each other.

Well that's interesting.

Two sets of bleary eyes shot up when she cleared her throat.

“It’s his fault,” Teo said quickly, pointing a finger at Jacques.

“Ishabeeellla,” Jacques slurred with a crooked smile and let go of Teo, leaving him stumbling backward. He barreled into her, practically knocking her back onto the stairs, and swallowed her in a sloppy hug. “Mmm, you smell good.”

“And you smell of liquor.”

“Te-qui-la,” he sang.

Teo managed not to fall over as he weaved toward the living room. “
Gracias a Dios
. Come here you gorgeous couch.” He flipped over the back, head first, and disappeared from view. The loud thump that followed said he’d missed the couch and hit the floor instead. The next sound was a curse, then heavy snoring.

“Come on,
mi borracho
. Let’s get you to bed.” She pulled her arms tighter around Jacques, who could barely stand, let alone walk.

“With you, gladly.” The smirk was full of suggestion.

“Slow down, lover boy. It’s sleep for you.” That is if Jacques didn’t pass out on the stairs.

Jacques leaned into her, sniffing her hair and giggling. Actually giggling. She’d never heard him do that, or seen him drunk for that matter. Despite the bitterness earlier, she smiled. Drunk Jacques was quite cute and she’d take this over the angry version any day.

Somehow, they made their way up.
Dios mío, Jacques is heavy
. As they staggered together down the hall, he pulled away, hit the wall, then swung his hand out. It teetered in the air until she grabbed it.

“Walk, Jacques. I’m putting you to bed.”

“Bed,” he said, pawing at her as she pulled him away from the wall. Before they made it to their bedroom, he veered left and pulled her into the bedroom next to theirs.

Well, a bed’s a bed and this one will have to do
.

She maneuvered him to the edge. Before she could sit him down, Jacques leaned into her and they both flopped onto the mattress.

“Sit up, Jacques. Let me get you out of your clothes.”

“Love the idea, Mrsss. Messszarosss.” All the “s’s” ran together.

“Sit. Up.”

He did and she pulled off his tie, wrestled him out of his jacket one heavy arm at a time. When she started on the buttons of his shirt, he snickered, “What are we going to do about those naughty hands?” and rolled on top of her.

But instead of getting all hot and heavy, he scooted down her torso and pressed his ear to her belly. “There’s somebody in there,” he said, his breath warm against her skin.

Isabella bit her lip in anticipation of the anger that would surely follow.

Then Jacques looked up through his black lashes and giggled again. “It’s a baby.” The awed expression on his face made him look like he was making some grand revelation and she had no clue.

“I know, Jacques. It’s our baby.”

His gaze returned to her belly and he ran clumsy hands over her nightgown, trying to smooth the silk. “You have a good mommy. A very bad daddy, but a good mommy.”

Her heart squeezed in her chest when his forehead fell as if in defeat.

Then, he started babbling, “But I’ll do my best. I don’t know any lullabies so I’ll just hum, ‘kay?”

Jacques started to hum. It wasn’t a song, more like a jumble of breath and sound, but it was the single, most beautiful sound that ever filled her ears.