Passion By Control (Passion Series Book 2) (36 page)

I was terrified that something would go wrong and he would not complete the change, ultimately making him lost to me forever. I was almost breaking out in a cold sweat over the prospect that he would walk through that door, take one look at me and want me gone.

It was on the cards that nothing would change; that he still would be furious with me, and dead against having anything to do with his child. Of course I had to make it through this pregnancy and it was still so early, there was still so much that could go wrong. All I could do was hope desperately that nothing would. This had been Fabian’s one and only chance to father a child and whether he wanted the baby or not, I certainly did. I just had to hope with everything in me, that I would carry it to term.

“Can I get you something to eat or drink Sirene?” Allegra’s voice made me jump when she suddenly spoke in my ear.

I smiled at her. “No thank you, I’m fine. I just…I just…well…I…I just want them back. I need to see he’s ok and then I’ll go home.”

“Won’t you stay and talk to him? He may wish to speak with you. He’s a bastard I know this and he doesn’t always think before he opens his mouth, but I do know that he loves you. It’s a surprise to see, as he’s never cared for anyone. He probably got scared, he panicked when he heard you were pregnant, but don’t give up on him. He just needs time to adjust to the idea. A lot has happened to him over the last weeks and now he’s vampire again. He loved you as a vampire; he can love you again as a vampire. All is not lost, ok? He’s an arse but with you he shows a side of himself none of us have ever seen in him before.” She reached over and touched my arm. “Don’t lose hope and try to keep calm and care for that baby. This child is a miracle as I’m sure you’re already aware.”

I nodded. “I know, there is no chance for another now he is to be vampire again. I just hope he can learn to accept what has happened. I really didn’t do this deliberately. Who could have known that he would be so fertile given he’d been dead for centuries?” My smile was rueful.

Allegra laughed softly. “I think fate had a hand in this one. Somewhere in all this is a lesson to be learned and perhaps Fabian will learn something? His life has changed so much over the last year. Firstly me being the reincarnated witch from his past, then you, ok we sent you, but what happened? He fell in love with you. Despite his blinding fear of witches and trust me, he’s terrified of them, he still wants you. His last word as he died in that hospital before Dominick and Francesca started working on him, was your name. Even in death, or near death, he wanted you.”

My heart contracted painfully in my chest when I thought of last night. God, so much happened. We’d had sex, wonderful hot sex, but then there’d been the fight, his accident, his death and now the wait for him to return as vampire. Life was a roller coaster when it came to Fabian. Only with him, could so much happen in the space of such a short time.

I was getting so anxious waiting for him to walk through the door. I needed to see that he was alright. I was exhausted. So much had happened and I would have loved to have showered, put on some makeup, brushed my hair, anything to make me at least look like someone he would want in his life but I was out of time.

We all froze when we heard the front door open and then close. I strained to hear the sound of footsteps. Were there three sets or only two?

Dominick entered the room first and his eyes met mine briefly, something flickering in their deep blue depths before they warmed as he walked over to Allegra, pulling her into his arms, his lips covering hers. Tears pricked my eyes at the sight of them. They were so wildly in love with one another.

Lucian walked in next throwing himself down on one of the lounges and my eyes turned, glued on the entry way waiting for Fabian.

Fabian

It felt almost strange walking back into his home as a vampire again. He felt good, strong and confident; basically he had his mojo back, well almost. There was just one thing, or more specifically one person who would make it all better for him, but had he fucked it up royally when he stormed out of her room last night?  Well he was about to find out whether he could repair the damage he’d done, since Nick had informed him that his little witch was in fact in his home.

When he stepped into the living room his eyes shifted straight to her. Sirene was watching him, tension clearly evident on her face and as he moved towards her, he saw tears well up in her eyes.

Once he was in front of her, he didn’t stop, he merely reached out, cupping the back of her head and pulled her forward, into his arms. His lips came down on hers, demanding entry to her mouth and when she complied, his tongue sought out hers, tangling with it, caressing it before sucking it gently into his mouth.

Fabian kissed her, putting everything he could into it. He showed her his love, his gratitude, his regrets and he showed her how sorry he was. With every lick of his tongue over hers and with every brush of his fingers through her raven hair, as he held her, kissing her, loving her, he begged for her forgiveness.

Finally he pulled back when she started to make tiny gasping sounds deep in her throat. He raised his lips from hers and his other hand came up, his palm cupping her cheek so he could tilt her face up to his. He studied each and every one of her beautiful features, seeing the shadow of her fatigue, the tension around her eyes, seeing the sorrow that dulled the brilliant green of them, knowing he was responsible for every emotion that showed on her face.

She stared back at him, the tears in her eyes, shimmering, threatening to fall. When one finally tipped over and began to roll slowly down her cheek, his thumb swept along and wiped it away before he lowered his head to her, his lips gently kissing her, where the trace of moisture remained.

When another tear fell, he repeated the process, his touch gentle, loving and she smiled at him, her lips trembling. He could see her love for him burning in her eyes, despite her tears and he felt the first tiny spark of relief, that moment where he realised all might not be lost.

“Hi my beautiful little witch.” He said softly, his thumbs still gently wiping away her tears. He touched her like she was delicate, fragile, like she was a precious thing, which she was. She was precious to him.  

He wasn’t sure why she was crying but he hoped those were the tears of a woman who was relieved and pleased to see her man.

His words to her last night came back to him filling his head and he frowned. Maybe she was crying because she had expected him to treat her badly? Fuck he could be such an arse sometimes. Well, she did tell him that often enough. He had treated her badly and despite everything it was her, who had demanded Nick save him. He knew what a sacrifice that would have been for her, given she had hoped for a future with him as human. She had saved him and she’d made Nick save him which was a monumental sacrifice for both of them really. She had given up her dreams of a human future to save his life. He didn’t deserve someone as giving and selfless as Sirene but despite his behaviour last night, he couldn’t let her go, he couldn’t set her free to perhaps find a suitable human man to live out her life with.  He was too selfish for that. He wanted her, he loved her and now he had to prove to her that he was worthy of her love, and beg for her forgiveness for walking out on her last night.

“It’s good to see you alive and well, or maybe I should rephrase that?” Francesca said, appearing at his side touching her lips to his cheek. “You’re like a cat aren’t you? You defy death over and over again.”

Reluctantly he dragged his focus from Sirene to turn to Francesca, fighting the irritation he felt at the interruption. “I think fortunate or lucky would be more appropriate Francesca. Now if you don’t mind, all of you.” He raised his eyes to scan around the room. “I wish to speak to Sirene alone but first I thank you all for your help to save my life and bring me home. It is getting late. You should all go and get some rest and we can talk this evening.” He met the eyes of each vampire in the room before finally turning back to his little witch. “Come my beauty, we have much to discuss and I would prefer we do that in private.” He held his hand out to her.

She placed her small hand in his and his fingers closed around hers. “Come.” He started walking with her, to leave the room where everyone else was, and as they passed by Francesca she snickered.

“Since when do you need privacy Father, and is having much to discuss the new name for sex these days is it?”

“Back off Francesca.” Fabian warned before walking from the room, his long stride carrying him swiftly to his bedroom. It was only when he stopped outside the door that he realised Sirene had been forced to half run to keep up with him, and she was panting lightly as he opened the bedroom door.

“I’m sorry my beauty, but I was in a hurry to get you alone and away from my smart mouthed child. She tends to lack the natural brain to mouth filter.” He led her into the bedroom and closed the door.

“Francesca lacks the filter?” Sirene raised an eyebrow at him. “It seems she’s not the only one that suffers from that condition.”

Fabian winced. “Ouch. I presume you’re referring to me and in particular to my behaviour last night?”

“It’s good to see you alive and well again Fabian. Well, you know what I mean.” Her smile was rueful before her expression turned serious. “Do you remember the accident? Do you know why you crashed?”

“I remember my beauty. I remember us fucking.” He felt his cock stir at the memory of the sex they’d had. “I remember you telling me that you’re pregnant.” His eyes drifted to her still flat stomach. “I certainly remember running away from you and I remember driving like a mad man.” He reached out to cup her cheek. “But then I remember thinking to myself that I was a fool, a fucking idiot. That you had not become pregnant to torture me and yes, if you had not missed any of your pills, then perhaps we would not be in this position now but it’s happened. I understand that a lot has taken place over the last few weeks and that you were distracted, so that’s why you missed some days. I had so many thoughts going through my head, the main one being blind panic. Not because I felt trapped in any way but you have to understand, I never once factored becoming a father into my life. I’d been vampire for centuries and as a vampire, I’m not capable of getting anyone pregnant. I have three weeks as a human and suddenly you’re expecting? You have to understand, all I wanted was to be vampire again and you’re telling me you’re with child? I began to feel trapped, to panic, so I ran until halfway home, common sense told me that I was being a fucking idiot. I should not have run out on you, I should not have attacked you like this was all your fault. I knew I had to talk to you so….I…well, I went to turn back. That’s when it all went wrong. I hit a patch of oil on the road, something, I’m not sure. Perhaps it was just that I was going too fast and I lost control. I remember it hitting the kerb and beginning to flip over and it landed on its roof. There was smoke, but apart from a brief moment of thinking I was about to die, really die, never to come back kind of death, beyond that moment, I remember nothing.”

“So you’re not still angry about the baby?” She asked.

“My darling, I’m terrified and now I’m vampire again, I’m even more terrified. I have children, but as you know, they are children only because I sired them, I made them vampires. I have never, nor did I ever expect to become a father of a child I sired from my loins. I have no idea how I will be around a human baby, and my greatest concern is that I might not be able to control myself and will try to drink from my child.”

Sirene reached up and trailed her fingers down his cheek. “You won’t do that Fabian. I don’t believe you would do that to your own child at all. You have been vampire for a very long time and you have wonderful control. I’ve seen it, you will be no danger to our baby.” She suddenly grabbed his chin between her fingers, her grip surprisingly strong. “But if you do, I’ll kill you. I am a witch don’t forget.” She gave him a sweet smile which was definitely at odds with her threat.

Fabian couldn’t help himself; he gave a short burst of laughter at her words. “I do suspect my little witch is getting tough with me.” He dropped a hard kiss on her lips. “Your threat is noted and I will do everything I can to make sure I do not bring your wrath down upon me. I’m not sure how many times I can handle dying and coming back anyway.”

Sirene grinned at him. “Oh trust me; you won’t come back from it if you do anything to harm our child.”

“You know you make me hard when you tease me my beauty.” His cock was now like an iron bar in his jeans. “I want to fuck you. Will you allow me that pleasure?”

She smiled at him before nodding. “I would prefer to have a shower first though Fabian. I’ve not had a chance to shower yet since we had sex last and well….I...” She trailed off.

He understood her reluctance. It seemed to be a common female problem he’d found. Their deep seated concern that they would smell or be unpleasant to be near yet nothing could be further from the truth as far as he was concerned.

“My beauty, we will both shower. It’s been a long night and I still have some blood on me I noticed, after my accident. Before we do shower I want you to understand that there is no need for you to be concerned or worried about your cunt. You don’t need to worry about the look of it or the smell of it. If you are full of my cum, then you most certainly have nothing to worry about. Just knowing that you smell of me, that your body is filled with me makes me hard. I like to know I’m on you, in you, that you have been marked and that you are sticky from me. It makes me want to bury my nose in you and breathe deeply of that heady combination that is your sweet scent and me. In fact, I think I will indulge myself of that little pleasure right now.”

He grinned when she gasped at his words. Hopefully she got the message. There was nothing about her hot little cunt that would put him off and it excited him knowing she had spent hours, all through the night actually filled with him, smelling of him, his scent all over her. Not to mention the fact that a part of him was now lodged inside her; nestled in her womb. The more he thought about it, the more he had to silently confess to himself, he liked it. The idea that he’d been able to get her pregnant, that his seed was strong enough, that he was fertile enough, made him want to puff out his chest. It was the male desire to dominate, to stake his claim, prove his virility, to leave his mark and that was how he felt about Sirene. She was his and now everyone would know that as she grew ripe with his child.