Penult (24 page)

“
Who?”

“
Wendell Frank.”

***

The other ladies piled into the car
and drove over to see me as soon as Jess informed them about my
awakening. I made damn sure Fiona didn’t leave the house without
bringing Wendell’s note and my cell phone and charger. They fussed
over me like I was some invalid.

The NHS neurologist was reluctant to
release me even though the tests had failed to reveal anything
wrong. That was no surprise to me, but they insisted on keeping me
for observation one more night.

I was anxious to talk to Wendell, but
I had to wait until I was alone. The ladies were in no hurry to
leave. I was patient with them, even ate my dinner in front of them
all because Helen refused to leave until she had visual evidence
that I had taken some nourishment.

I encouraged Jess quietly to clear
them out of my room so she feigned exhaustion and got Fiona and
Britt to take her home. Helen stayed behind, but she moved down the
hall to sit with Ren. They hadn’t been gone five minutes before I
slipped out my phone and gave Wendell a ring.

“
Well, well, well. If it
isn’t the wonder boy.”

“
Got your message. What do
you want?”

“
Same, same. Go see Zhang.
He’s waiting.”

“
I did go back.”

“
We know. But you went to
see that Luther guy. What the fuck?”

“
Zhang’s not even in
Frelsi. They tell me Frelsi doesn’t even exist anymore. Zhang might
even be dead.”

“
Zhang’s not dead. I mean,
well … yeah, he’s dead. He’s a fucking Freesoul. But he’s still in
the Lim. And you need to go back and go find him.”

“
But … I just got back
here.”

“
Fine. Take a break. But
you need to head back as soon as you can. And next time you go, you
need to find go Zhang. Shouldn’t be that hard. But listen, you
crossed over. That’s a big step in the right direction. So we’ll
ease up on the heat a little. As long as you keep making progress.
At least now we know you can take a hint.”

“
Heat? Sturgie. The fire?
That was you?”

“
Not me personally. My
people.”

“
What the fuck? Sturgie was
a friend!”

“
Got your attention, didn’t
it?”

“
You almost killed Renfrew,
too.”

“
Guess we gotta try a
little harder this time.”

“
You’re an asshole. You
know that?”

“
Hey, I told you not to
dilly-dally. I told you there would be consequences if you
did.”

My face was hot and I was bursting
with rage. I could barely talk.

“
And Karla?”

“
What about
her?”

“
Did you … take her? Off
her?”

“
I don’t know what you’re
talking about.”

“
She’s gone. You have
anything to do with it?”

“
Not us, no. But frankly,
that might have been the next step if you hadn’t
cooperated.”

“
Then who did?”

“
How the fuck should I
know? Wasn’t us.”

“
Find her. I know you have
the ability. I’ll cross back sooner if you find out where she
is.”

He chuckled. “Kid. You know things
don’t work that way. You really think us finding her is going to
put you in a better frame of mind?”

“
So you’re lying. You did
take her.”

“
Fuck no. Why would I lie?
But honestly, come to think of it … maybe we should find go and
find her, if only to make sure she stays away from you. You might
not think so, but I have principles. I wasn’t gonna mess with your
girl but since she’s already been messed with. Why not?”

“
Fuck you! Then I’m not
going to see Zhang.”

“
Fine. Then we take her
out. How’s that for incentive?”

“
You do that and you know
there’s no fucking way I’m ever doing anything for Zhang or any of
you assholes.”

There was a long pause. I could hear
clinking glasses … music … some kind of jazz … in the
background.

“
Okay. Then you listen to
me. Once we find her, you can forget about ever seeing her
again.”

My stomach imploded. “But
why?”

“
Because this is how we
make it work. If you do what I ask, I’ll guarantee she doesn’t get
hurt. How’s that sound?”

“
What?”

“
You do your job. We keep
her safe. But she’s out of your life. Forever.”

“
That’s bullshit. She
doesn’t even want to be alive. She wants to be a
Freesoul.”

“
We find her. We make sure
she doesn’t. But you never see her again.”

“
How will I know she’s
okay?”

“
We’ll show you. Pictures
or something. We’ll prove it to you. We’ll give her a good life. We
have places. Nice places to put people away but take care of
them.”

“
What the fuck?”

“
You want her alive or
not?”

I could not find any words.

“
Fine. Then we kill her.
Send her back to the Deeps.”

“
No!”

“
Then we have a
deal?”

My heart was thumping hard. I was
sweating like an Ebola victim.

“
Yeah. Go find her. Keep
her safe. Please. I’ll go see Zhang … as soon as I can.”

“
Deal!” He cleared his
throat. “So … uh … any idea where she might be?”

Chapter 23: Search
Party

When I hung up the phone I felt as my
vital organs had all been rearranged. I felt more discombobulated
now than when I had just woken up from my two day coma.

I couldn’t be sure that Wendell didn’t
already have Karla despite my visions. I couldn’t trust that the
glimpses of Karla I had garnered through the Liminality were even
real. And keeping her alive under Wendell’s care? She might
perceive that as a betrayal of her wishes. In her frame of mind of
late, forcing her to stay alive might be her worst conceivable
torture. But if she was miserable, would that not force her to the
Liminality where I had a better chance of finding her?

No path seemed right. No outcome
seemed favorable. But getting Wendell involved at least gave me
some assurance that I would actually learn what had happened to
her. Not knowing her fate was the worst part of all
this.

I felt so awful after that call that I
could almost feel the roots come swarming in the periphery of my
senses, ready to take me back. I guess that was the point of
Wendell’s manipulations.

But my soul wasn’t quite ready to
return to the Liminality. The little bit of hope that kept my soul
moored was that Karla might still be free of Wendell, roaming some
city on her own like the girl in my vision. How long could she stay
free? That was the question. Clearly, it was only a matter of time
before Wendell’s people found her and put her away.

***

The hospital released me the next
morning, but Renfrew remained stuck in the hospital. Jess brought
me home and I spent the afternoon sitting in the attic, staring out
the window. Helen had to beg me to come down for lunch. Needless to
say, my mood remained ripe for a visitation. The only thing that
kept me here was the urge to spite Wendell.

But what was the point of carrying on
here if I would never see Karla again on this side of life? I had
no doubt that Wendell had the capability to carry out his threat.
All he cared about was keeping me miserable.

My only hope was to go out and find
her myself, before Wendell’s people got her. It was a rather
hopeless hope but it was all I had left.

Helen finally managed to coax me down
the attic stairs for a snack. Spread on the table were cookies
dipped in chocolate, a bowl of fresh strawberries and a platter of
lemon tarts. I looked at these goodies as if it were a bunch of
sheep’s eyes and spoiled tripe. I did not partake.

“
Why so glum?” said Helen.
Jess caught my eye and held my gaze. Of all the ladies, she had the
clearest understanding of what was going on with me.

“
We can go find her
ourselves,” said Britt.

“
A road trip! Any idea
where she might have gone?” said Kitt.

“
It has to be the father,”
said Helen. “First Isobel, now her. Who else would take them
both?”

I didn’t say a word about Wendell. In
fact, I did not say a word, period.

“
Glasgow,” said Helen.
“That’s where he and his lot were setting up his base of
operations. What a place for a bunch of super Catholics to end up.
Scotland, of all places. What were they thinking?”

“
Like the old Irish
missionaries. That’s what they’re thinking,” said Fiona. “That they
are one and the same.”

“
I bet the Scots don’t
fancy that,” said Helen. “Anyhow. Let’s go! I’ll pack some goodies
to take. It will be good to get out of town for a bit. It’s been
ages since I’ve been on a holiday.”

“
What about
Ren?”

“
Oh, he’ll be fine,” said
Helen. “This will force him to spend more time with his brother.
Our neighbor is looking after the goats.”

“
I’m not sure this is a
good idea,” I said. “I don’t want to put you all in harm’s way. I
mean, it’s dangerous.”

“
Dangerous?”

“
Karla’s father. He’s … a
threat. And … not just him.”

“
It’s true,” said Jess.
“These Sedevacantists. Izzie told me that they’re heavily armed.
They practically have their own militia.”

“
Not a problem,” said
Britt. “I served three years in the SAS. Helen can stay back with
Fiona. Us tough gals can help the lad.”

“
Tough gals?” said Fiona,
cocking an eyebrow.

“
You don’t think I’m tough
enough?” said Britt.

“
You, maybe. But
Jess?”

“
What? How am I not tough?”
said Jess, gaping in mock indignation.

“
You’re a girlie girl like
me,” said Fiona. “Yes, you worked on a goat farm but … I can’t see
you fighting anyone.”

“
Why should you two have
all the fun?” said Helen. “What are me and Fiona supposed to do?
Stay home and do needlework?”

“
I suppose we could close
the gallery for a week or two,” said Britt. “Declare a
holiday.”

“
That settles it, then. We
all go!” said Jess. “I’ll go online and book us some train tickets
to Glasgow.”

“
A search party!” said
Fiona. “This is going to be so much fun.”

“
Fiona! Please! Be
serious,” said Helen. “There may have been a
kidnapping.”

But Fiona could not hide her
excitement. She was practically buzzing with thrill. As for me, I
had serious doubts whether this was a good idea but I did not have
near the energy to blunt their momentum.

Chapter 24: Flying
Lessons

I dragged myself back up the attic
stairs and crawled back into my shell, curling up on the futon
while the ladies banged around downstairs, putting away pots and
pans, packing their stuff. I didn’t have much of my own stuff to
pack beyond a change of clothes and a tooth brush, so I just stayed
and wallowed in my little stupor.

When they called me down for tea, I
ignored them at first, pretending to be asleep. But after some
cajoling from Helen and a kick in the pants from Britt, I made my
way downstairs for some finger sandwiches and a salad with olives
and pickled artichokes. I didn’t think I was hungry but the first
bite proved me wrong. I polished off a bunch of the little
sandwiches and an extra helping of salad.

Helen squinted at me over her tea cup.
“You might want to shower before we go, hon. Your hair is sticking
up every which way.”

“
Sorry. I haven’t been
feeling well.”

“
Understandable. But now’s
the time to pull yourself together. Today we do something positive
about the situation!”

“
Hear, hear!” Britt raised
her mug and clinked it against Helen’s.

“
Wait … we’re going
today?”

“
You have exactly one hour
before we’re off to the station.”

I slid back my chair and made my way
back to the attic to get my shit together. I felt so damn heavy,
like a deep sea diver slogging down the middle of the Marianas
Trench. Even the simplest actions had become cruel ordeals. This
was not my usual brand of blues. This was something deeper. Was it
… grief?

I slammed the door to the bathroom and
peeled off my sour, slept-in clothes, and set the shower on
scald.

***

The hot shower helped my mood a bit. I
was still plenty sluggish and humorless but at least it got my
blood flowing.

We left the house to walk to the train
station. Helen carried an overnight bag slung over her shoulder,
Fiona and Britt their matching Jan Sport packs while Jess dragged a
purple and flowery carry-on with wheels. I carried a plastic Boots
sack with my last fresh pair of undies and a sweater. I decided to
leave my dirty clothes behind. After all, I still had that ivory
credit card burning a hole in my pocket.