People of the Earth (48 page)

 
          
 
She shook her head, watching the first
flickers of starlight in the eastern sky. "Then I realize it's all a
dream-something that's gone forever. The people I loved are dead. Their bodies
have been torn apart by coyotes and ravens by now. The bones are picked clean
and scattered in the sagebrush. The lodges are empty—if the Wolf People even
left them standing. Their laughter is gone from the world, Bad Belly. Only
silence remains."

           
He wound his fingers
into hers. The world changes. We're part of that. Humans aren't any different
than coyotes or wolves. Sometimes hunger kills the babies and the old ones.
Sometimes we're wounded during the hunt—or a sickness grows inside us. It's
just the way of the world. I don't understand it, but things happen that way.
Maybe the Creator knows why. Maybe this Thunderbird you Sun People talk about
knows. Maybe when you Dream, you can ask the Spirit Powers.

 
          
 
“If
IDream
. It's my
choice, Bad Belly. Singing Stones says I can refuse to use the Power. I'll have
to choose between . . . well, between illusion and the things of this world. Do
you know what that means?"

 
          
 
He shook his head morosely. "No."

 
          
 
"What if I choose not to use Power, not
to be their Dreamer?"

 
          
 
"Then that's what you choose."

 
          
 
"Will you ... I mean, you won't leave me?
Think that I've let you down?"

 
          
 
He smiled at her. "I'll always love you,
no matter what you decide. I'll do anything you want me to do. If you want to
run away and live in a cave in the land of the Antelope People, I'll go with
you. You don't have to do anything to please me. Be who you are . . . who you
want to be."

 
          
 
"Why are you so good to me?"

 
          
 
He shrugged and gazed out at the stars.
"Something happened that I never thought would. I've come to love you,
White Ash. It frightens me . . . scares me to death. I guess I just can't help
it. I'm making a mess of it again. If Bad Belly falls in love with a woman, it
will be with a beautiful and Powerful Dreamer who will probably toss lightning
between her fingers and Sing the weather and call the elk. If Bad Belly must
love, it will be a woman beyond his reach. Oh, no, you won't find Bad Belly
falling in love with some simple woman who would like nothing better than to sit
around the lodge and cook the meals and raise the children. Leave it for Bad
Belly to involve himself in the impossible."

 
          
 
She tilted her chin. "Why am I
impossible? Why am I beyond your reach?"

 
          
 
"Because Power calls you. Because you and
I could never live like normal people." He hung his head. "Because of
all the things behind us—the scars we bear—and what life has done to us. We are
who we are. I'll never be a brave hero worthy of a woman as beautiful and
Powerful as you will become."

 
          
 
She hugged him tightly, closing her eyes.
"You're brave enough for me, Bad Belly. Don't talk as if I were someone
special. I don't feel that way. I only feel confused, like a feather caught by
the wind. You're the one person in my life I can cling to."

 
          
 
"What about the man you said you
loved?"

 
          
 
A star appeared on the horizon. Did it line up
with any of the rocks? Absently she studied the star as she thought about Wind
Runner. What if he had survived? What if he came for her before the first snow?

 
          
 
"Wind Runner? He's young, handsome, a
cunning warrior. He saved me once from Brave Man when he would have raped me
and carried me off to the Broken Stones." She tightened her grip on Bad
Belly's fingers. "If Wind Runner survived, he ran off to join the Black Point.
He was my father's brother's son. The way the Sun People think, a mating
between us would be incestuous—no matter that I wasn't of White Clay blood. If
he ran off to the Black Point, challenged their best warrior and survived, he
could declare his clan and family dead. Then he could marry me without
shame."

 
          
 
Bad Belly had a curiously sad look on his
face. "He must love you a great deal to accept such a challenge."

 
          
 
She blinked. "Yes. I ... I told him I
loved him, that I'd marry him if he survived. He promised to come for me before
the first snowfall. After Three Bulls ... I don't know what I'd do. So much has
changed since I said good-bye to Wind Runner on that ridge top. Maybe the Wolf
People killed him before they attacked the White Clay. Maybe he died in challenge
with the Black Point. Maybe ..."

 
          
 
"He'll survive," Bad Belly said
resolutely. "He has to."

 
          
 
She cocked her head. "What makes you so
sure? Everything else that I loved has been taken away from me."

 
          
 
He chuckled, the sound humorless with resignation.
"He lives. He'll come. I can feel it, something about the Power. Call it a
hunch. Call it prophecy. I guess it just feels right ... like the pattern of
Power. You'll see Wind Runner again."

 
          
 
Her heart leaped, a sudden surge of hope mixed
with horror. "No, I can't. I couldn't bear the thought of him touching me.
Three Bulls killed that. I hope Wind Runner finds a woman among the Black
Point. She can give him strong sons and healthy daughters. After that, maybe
Power will let him live happily. If I could have any wish, it would be that he
forget I ever existed."

 
          
 
Bad Belly rubbed his thumb tenderly along the
back of her hand. "Why would you have a man who loved you forget you? Love
is a wonderful thing. It comes too rarely in life."

 
          
 
She grunted. "Love is a curse ... an
illusion."

 
          
 
"You don't feel like an illusion to me.
And I've come to love you a great deal."

 
          
 
Her imagination ran wild with images of Wild
Runner coming to claim her. She could see his exuberant smile, the keen
anticipation in his eyes. She could hear his declaration of love. And when she
told him she couldn't accept? What then? Would he grab her, throw her down and
lift her dress like Three Bulls did? Would the soft love in his eyes change to
anger? Would he beat the resistance out of her?

 
          
 
"Wind Runner's not like that," she
whispered to herself, trying to make sense of the confused images. Three Bulls'
eyes mixed with Wind Runner's, the features of their faces merging, becoming
one.

 
          
 
"No, he's probably not." Bad Belly
took his hand from hers to rearrange the robe about her shoulders. "What
Three Bulls did to you will slowly heal. The scar will always be there, but
you'll come to see that men and women couple without horror and pain. If Wind
Runner is worthy of your love, he will understand and give you time to come to
terms with it."

 
          
 
She studied him from the corner of her eye.
"Why do you think so?"

 
          
 
He gave her a warm grin. "No matter that
you've been reborn, your soul hasn't changed. A man you loved would be worthy
of you. If Wind Runner's willing to risk all to win you, then he's worthy. Not
only that, I see the softness in your eyes when you speak of him. You think
he's worthy too; but what happened with Three Bulls has left you unsure,
frightened that perhaps you didn't understand everything."

 
          
 
She inhaled the night air and enjoyed the rich
smells of the cooling rocks and new vegetation. "Singing Stones says I can
never go back."

 
          
 
Bad Belly pulled her to him, running his
fingers through her hair. She closed her eyes and savored the feel of his
gentle touch. For the moment, she could ignore the worry.

 
          
 
"Everything will be new," Bad Belly
agreed. "If you go with Wind Runner, it will be as two new people living
new lives. He will be a Black Point warrior, with status and reputation. You
will go with him as a woman who has chosen the path of her life. I think you
will become a powerful woman, respected and looked up to among the Black
Point."

 
          
 
She shifted placing a hand on his chest.
"And you, Bad Belly? Will you come with me?"

 
          
 
He shook his head, a wistful smile on his
lips. "I—" He stopped short and laughed softly at himself. "I
guess I just broke my promise. When I said I would do anything you wanted me
to, I didn't think about Wind Runner. No, White Ash. I will wish you peace and
happiness and follow a different path."

 
          
 
"Now you sound sad."

 
          
 
"The only thing I would ask of life, or
Power, or Dreams, would be that you find happiness."

 
          
 
At that moment a bright streak lit the
darkening sky. Greenish-yellow fire—almost too bright to look at—angled across
the curve of the horizon, its trail glowing eerily. As quickly, it vanished
over the southern mountains, an afterglow fading in its wake.

 
          
 
"Blessed Thunderbird!" White Ash
whispered. The skin of her back prickled.

 
          
 
Bad Belly gasped. "I've seen the stars
Dancing and streaking the sky before—but never so brightly. And it burned
green, did you see?" He sniffed at the wind, scenting the air like a
worried elk.

           
 
“What are you smelling for?"

 
          
 
He sighed. "Smoke. It looked like it
burned. I know, it crossed the sky way up and over to the east, but it must
have burned something. Like the sun. I just always sniff for smoke—even when I
know it's too far away, and downwind at that."

 
          
 
She nestled against him. "Doesn't it
frighten you? Perhaps that was an evil Spirit throwing someone out of the
Star-web."

 
          
 
Bad Belly hugged her reassuringly. "Why
should I be afraid?"

 
          
 
"What if it was a sign of terrible things
to come?"

 
          
 
"What if it wasn't? A green light shot
across the sky. That's all we know. Maybe it was a sign of terrible things to
come. Maybe it was two Spirits playing a game with each other, throwing fire
around like little boys playing hoop and stick. In that case, it means nothing.
What if it was really a sign that a Dreamer had come to save all the people?
What good would it do me to fear it?"

 
          
 
"And if it was a sign of terrible things
coming and you didn't fear it?"

 
          
 
Bed Belly rubbed his chin on the top of her
head. "Then bad things will come anyway. What could I do to change them?
If I stood up and screamed, 'Bad things, go away!' at the top of my lungs,
would they?" He shook his head and laughed. "It seems to me that
there are plenty of things to fear without creating more because of lights in
the sky."

 
          
 
She shivered. "It frightened me."

 
          
 
He gave her hand a squeeze. "Come on.
Let's get back to Singing Stones. He probably has a feast ready for us. If you
stay up here, you'll worry and worry until you have horrible Dreams all night
long, and I'll get no sleep because I'll have to hold you and pat you and tell
you it's all right."