People of the Fire (39 page)

 
          
 
He swallowed and forced his attention off to
the east, out over the huge basin where Heavy Beaver now controlled the Short
Buffalo People. "Yes," he replied dully. "A long time." And
Hungry Bull lived alone, probably more alone than he did. Would it be so
terrible? Would it be a betrayal of the dead if he slept with Rattling Hooves,
who smiled warmly and had laughter dancing in her gentle eyes?

 
          
 
"You look unhappy."

 
          
 
He shook his head, still wondering what he
felt. "I don't know. No, not unhappy. Just . . . lost. Like I don't
understand anything anymore. So much is happening and I'm . . ."

 
          
 
"Confused?"

 
          
 
He nodded, glancing at her. "Every time I
start to feel like I know where I am, it all changes again."

 
          
 
She stared at him, a slight frown on her face.
"Can I help?"

 
          
 
"I don't know." Then sourly:
"You may not want to. I seem to bring trouble wherever I go. Do you know
the story of my real mother, Clear Water?"

 
          
 
She gasped, staring at him with wide eyes.
"That's who you are? The story's told among the Red Hand. That she had the
baby and was killed. That Two Smokes was crippled and the child died. That
White Calf came too late and only Two Smokes was alive."

 
          
 
"Well, that's not what they tell me. And
no one tells me who my father really was." He propped his chin.
"That's funny, don't you think?"

 
          
 
She bit her lip, staring off into the distance
as the evening rushed toward them. "You don't know? Really?"

 
          
 
"No. Two Smokes wouldn't tell me."

 
          
 
"Blood Bear."

 
          
 
He stiffened. "Blood Bear? My ..."
He shook his at the impossibility of it. "No. That can't be.
Impossible."

 
          
 
She avoided his eyes, turning her attention to
her suddenly nervous hands. "I don't know. He was married to Clear Water.
Something about a Dream of hers. Then she left the Red Hand with Two Smokes.
Blood Bear killed his father-in-law. Cut Feather."

           
 
"Who White Calf had been married
to." His understanding drifted away again, leaving him frustrated and
uncertain. "I don't. . . Why isn't this simple? Why does it always seem to
be caught up in circles without ending?" He swallowed hard, soul tracing
the pattern, understanding White Calf's words.

 
          
 
''What's wrong? You've gone pale."

 
          
 
"Blood and dung," he whispered
hoarsely. "It never stops, does it?"

 
          
 
"I don't understand." She shook his
hand, the touch warm against his. "Little Dancer? Are you all right? Look
at me."

 
          
 
Absently, he turned his head, seeing the anxious
light in her eyes. Her hand tightened on his. He smiled weakly.

 
          
 
"It's all right. Really, it is." But
his soul drifted like smoke, twisting and without form, homeless, to blow here
and there on the wind.

 
          
 
"You feel cold," she told him,
snuggling closer.

 
          
 
A sick feeling formed in the pit of his
stomach. Was that part of the Power? That he constantly be upset, left reeling
and off balance? Of course, he didn't know for a fact that Blood Bear really
was his father. Two Smokes would know— if he'd tell. Or else it all might
remain hidden, another layer, another circle within a circle to spring at him
when least expected.

 
          
 
Desperate, he hugged Elk Charm close, laying
his cheek on her head, enjoying the reality of her physical presence. The
fragrance of her hair filled his nostrils. A new stirring rose within him, one
associated only with Dreams.

 
          
 
He pushed her back so he could stare into her
worried eyes. She studied him anxiously.

 
          
 
"I don't know myself anymore."

 
          
 
She nodded slightly. "Could I help?"

 
          
 
Something about love and coupling under the
robes that lessens the way Power works within you. A man and woman joining like
that, it dilutes the call of the Power. Makes you less susceptible to the
thirst for Dreaming.

 
          
 
He stared into her kind eyes. "Have you
ever ..."

 
          
 
She smiled inquisitively. "Go on."

 
          
 
"You're a woman."

 
          
 
"You want to couple with me?" She
looked away into the distance, a slight flush rising in her cheeks. "If
your father marries my mother ..." She swallowed hard. "What would
... I mean, is that incest?"

 
          
 
He gave her a sober stare. "Hungry Bull
isn't my father. My mother was Clear Water. You say my father was . . . was
Blood Bear."

 
          
 
She chewed her lip for a moment before she
burst into happy laughter. "Of course! And he's not even of my clan! We're
free, Little Dancer. I've been worried about it for days, but we're free!"

 
          
 
"Then you'll let me?"

 
          
 
"According to my people, a man is made
when he kills his first big game. You killed buffalo."

 
          
 
He nodded, wishing his heart hadn't started to
pound again.

 
          
 
"You've never coupled with a woman
before?"

 
          
 
He shook his head.

 
          
 
"White Calf didn't want me around you.
She thought I might affect your Power."

 
          
 
"I know."

 
          
 
"Is that why you want to couple with
me?"

 
          
 
He grinned nervously. "Maybe a little.
Then, too, I Dreamed of you in the night—of what it's like."

 
          
 
"And we've coupled?"

 
          
 
He nodded.

 
          
 
"And planted seed?"

 
          
 
He nodded again.

 
          
 
She smiled to herself. "Among our
cousins, the White Crane People, it's said that a Dream like that twines souls
together. That if the people involved don't couple in life, it makes the soul
sick with longing, and eventually you'll die."

 
          
 
"I get this warm feeling inside every
time I look at you."

 
          
 
She giggled, pulling him to his feet.
"Come on. Let's go down in the trees. I think I'm ready to be a woman in
all ways. And I certainly don't want to take the chance of your soul
sickening."

 
          
 
She didn't let go of his hand as they
clambered off the rock and made their way into the limber pine.

           
 
Tanager enjoyed being right. She stepped out
in the trail, blocking Snaps Horn. "Quite a pack. You going on a
hunt?"

 
          
 
He started, lifting his arms in frustration.
"You know, one of these days you're going to scare someone and they're
going to drive a dart right through you."

 
          
 
"Want to bet?" She crossed her arms
and grinned. "You couldn't hit me with a dart if you wanted to. I may not
be as strong as you, but I'm quicker."

 
          
 
He worked his mouth, shaking his head.
"Maybe. All right, I'm going on a hunt."

 
          
 
She narrowed her eyes at the grim look he got.

 
          
 
"And now let me by. What I'm doing is
none of your business."

 
          
 
She nodded, a flutter of worry building.
"It's Elk Charm, isn't it? You're going after her."

 
          
 
"Maybe."

 
          
 
"It's not like you, answering short like
that. You're planning something else, too."

 
          
 
"What if I am?"

 
          
 
"You're in love with Elk Charm?"

 
          
 
He kicked at the dirt in the trail. "What
if I am?"

 
          
 
Tanager studied him curiously. "You've
been angry ever since you got back. You and Blood Bear."

 
          
 
"Leave him out of this."

 
          
 
"That's who you remind me of. Is that how
you want to be? Like him?"

 
          
 
Anger burst. "Look! You're always poking
around in my affairs. I put up with it because we're friends. But no more. I'm
going to go get Elk Charm away from that Short Buffalo boy and that's it! You
hear? Now get out of here!"

 
          
 
He shouldered by her, trembling with rage.

 
          
 
Tanager stared at his broad back as he left at
a trot. Short
Buffalo
boy? The one who lived with the witch?

 
          
 
Tanager squinted after him, pulling at her
hair. She nodded to herself. A burning anger she'd never seen before had been
goading him, something dangerous and deadly. If Snaps Horn caught the Short
Buffalo boy, he'd kill him. Elk Charm might be widowed before she got married.

 
          
 
* * *

           
 
Two Smokes watched from where he sat in the
shade. They had stretched out every hide they had under the limber pine. Now
Hungry Bull, Three Toes, and Black Crow whacked the branches with long poles,
flailing. From the shivering limbs, a wealth of pine nuts and needles cascaded
onto the hides.

 
          
 
"Does that look like all of it?"
Hungry Bull called out to Rattling Hooves.

 
          
 
"Enough for this one," she called
back, scrambling on hands and knees over the hides, checking the size and quality
of the harvest.

 
          
 
How many winters had passed since he'd heard
that spirit in Hungry Bull's voice? How long since he'd seen the light of
laughter in those pained brown eyes?

 
          
 
"Two Smokes?"

 
          
 
He craned his neck to find Little Dancer
picking his way down the rocks from where he and Elk Charm had been hunting for
packrat
middens
in the
rimrock
above.