Perfectly Scripted (14 page)

His shoulders rolled forward. “Yes, and that is my fault.”

The shock on my face was clearly evident, because Grady laughed.

“What? Don’t look at me that way. I can admit when I’m wrong.”

“Can you?” I asked sarcastically. “I didn’t think you remembered how.”

“I remember a kiss, which is what caused this tension between us.”

“Was there a kiss? I barely remember it.” I rolled my eyes.

“Recently, yes. There were a few.” He smiled. “All of them were very nice, but inappropriate.”

“Inappropriate is correct, and as long as we’re being honest, I shouldn’t have been such a willing participant at any time.”

He leaned his shoulder against the wall, his blue eyes twinkling. “Glad we agree on that.” He winked. “As far as the kiss goes, you’re always going to have a piece of my heart.”

“
Grady
,” I breathed softly. “More inappropriateness.”

“No, this is not my intention, I swear. Just an apology.” He moved from the wall to stand in front of me. “Look, you fascinate me,” he began, running his hand over the curve of his jaw. “You always have, but I think you know that. For so many reasons, you represent the ideal woman for me. You’re brave, incredibly strong, smart, and wildly sexy.”

“Grady, you—”

He held up his hands in surrender. “I promise I’m not trying to be a dick.”

My foot tapped against the marble floor, in an unhurried speed.

“Will you hear me out?”

“Fine.”

“Watching you overcome all of that pain and fear—well, let’s just say you inspired me every single day. We shared something special, and I tried to recapture that, but I couldn’t because it’s not what you wanted.
I
am not who you want.”

His words were both beautiful and sincere. Grady James was a man hard to forget, and he was one of the sexiest men I’d ever met. Beneath that playboy charm and mischievous grin, there was a true gentleman. He was more like Ronan than he would ever care to admit, I was sure. And that probably explained why he rivaled him or they rivaled each other. Both confident men radiated sex appeal, but only one man had all of me—mind, body, heart, and soul.

“And it didn’t hurt that I could stick it to Connolly for once.”

I laughed. “You almost had me convinced of your sincerity.” Pivoting on my heel, I walked away.

Before I could take two steps, though, Grady gently grabbed my arm, pulling me back.

“Wait,” he groaned. “I’m only kidding. Don’t go.”

“What do you want me to say? Were you only pursuing me to piss off Ronan? If that is true, it was a total dick move.”

He chuckled. “Sorry. That was a shitty thing to say, but no, that was not my reason. That night I saw you at the gala, it reminded me of a time in my life when I was in a good place. Everything was good: my life, my career, and having
you
.”

“This is all very nice, but, I’m confused, because you broke up with me, remember? And if things were so good, why would you ever want them to end?”

Placing his hands on my arms, he said, “Have you ever truly had too much of a good thing? That is how I felt about you all the time. ‘She is too good.’ ‘
This
is too good to be true.’”

A hundred thoughts flickered inside as I absorbed his admission. My mind carried me back to the night Grady had asked me to spend the night with him. We’d only been seeing each other about a month or so and hadn’t yet slept together. At that point, our relationship had been holding steady at second base. It had helped that my therapy had been going well, and I’d loved spending time with Grady. He was the first man I had been interested in having an intimate relationship with since the rape. The first man I’d thought about having sex with. A man I’d
wanted
to have sex with.

It had started innocently enough: coffee in the afternoon, happy hour cocktails after work, Sunday morning jogs through Central Park. But then one dinner had turned into two, and before I’d known it, I had been attending charity polo matches and red carpet events with him in a matter of weeks.

The warm night air danced across my skin as Grady led me out to his car, his firm touch pressed against the small of my back. Opening the passenger’s side door, he caught me by the shoulder. His fingers tugged at my chin.

“
I don’t want this night to end. Stay with me,” he said softly, his blue eyes pleading with me to say yes.

Sleep was my current nemesis. Mentally, I kept reminding myself over and over how dangerous it could be to stay all night with him. Anxiety attacks from flashbacks were happening less frequently, but nightmares were once a week if I was lucky. I was scared out of my mind that he would witness one of my breakdowns. It would send him running for the hills thinking I was batshit crazy.
My medication was just starting to help me manage my triggers. I felt ready to reclaim my sex life and stop feeling like a complete basket case.

As he pressed his tall frame against my body, I blinked up to see those impossibly beautiful baby blues searching my face. The solid length of his cock ground into my thigh. Before I could open my mouth to reply, though, his soft lips were on mine, and he was stroking my tongue with his. I moaned into his kisses, tugging at his hair, pulling him closer to me.

“
Grady…” I breathed.

His hands came up to hold my face. “So, can I take that as a yes?” A devilish smirk tugged the corners of his mouth.

“
Hmmm…
”
I mumbled,
slightly drunk from the kiss.

“
Holliday, let me have you. All of you.” He whispered the last three words.

My knees went weak at the warmth of his breath fanning across the shell of my ear and the beautiful request of his words. Then he lowered his mouth and sucked on my earlobe. A familiar hum of electricity wound its way through every inch of my body.

“
I want you in my bed. In my mind, I’ve tasted you a thousand times, but now, I want the real thing.”

He pressed his lips against my neck, kissing his way down to my shoulder. His fingers caressed up and down my back. I was more than ready to commit public acts of indecency in order to cure the deep ache inside me, and it felt wonderful.

“
Okay…I think I’d really like that,” I said breathlessly.

“
Good answer.”

Sometime after midnight in a panic, Grady pulled me from his bed. I had begun kicking the sheets, crying hysterically, and incoherently babbling on about Derek.

“
Holliday, shhh…Baby, you’re okay.”

Everything was sort of hazy, and I felt like I was having an out-of-body experience. The sound of running water filled my ears. I hadn’t realized I had been holding my breath until a rush of hot water hit my skin.

“
There is no one here named Derek. Just me, Grady.”

I mumbled, “Grady?” Then I blinked up to find him cradling me in his arms on the tile floor of his large walk-in shower.

More calming words poured from his lips while he gently rocked me, stroking my hair back. The warm spray washed over us like a gentle spring rain. The tension left my body, and I curled into him, repeatedly apologizing for my ramblings.

“
There’s no need to apologize. It will all be okay. I’m here and you’re safe.”

After that little episode, I hadn’t been able to open up to him about my attack. Shortly thereafter, Grady had come to a therapy session, and I’d told him what had happened to me. As suspected, he’d admitted that he’d thought I might have been sexually assaulted. I’d learned that his sister had been raped at a college party by her boyfriend’s roommate. That was how Grady had known how to respond to my nightmare by taking me into the shower.

“Did you hear me, Holliday?”

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I nodded. “Did you think you didn’t deserve something good, or was it that you were afraid of how good you felt?”

He opened his mouth to speak, but I interrupted him.

“We probably shouldn’t even go down this road.” I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the answer.

A wide, bright smile crossed his face. “Holliday, you seem extremely happy. I wanted to tell you that I am sorry. Furthermore, I’m not going to take that away from you or cheapen it with selfish tactics.”

“I appreciate that, Grady. I am happy. For the record, having you in my life during that time…” My hand covered his giving it a light squeeze. “I’m glad I had
you
. Thank you.”

“Me too, and you never have to thank me.” He smiled shyly, and a faint tinge of red splashed across his neck and his cheeks. “Speaking of being happy, Heather is pretty amazing. I’m going to give us a shot.”

“What? Are you saying you might
date
her?” I teased. “What will the world do with Grady James officially off the market?”

“With any luck, it’ll keep spinning.”

I laughed. “Let’s hope.”

People began to spill out into the hallway. Over his shoulder, I saw Heather standing near the ballroom entrance. He followed my gaze then grinned at me, his eyes wide. Smiling inwardly, I hoped he wasn’t in too much trouble, although he might have deserved some scolding from Heather.

“It was good to see you, Holliday. Take care,” he said with certain finality.

“You too, Grady.”

I watched until he disappeared into the crowd.

Ronan

My day could not end fast enough. It was brutally cold, and I was less than thrilled to be shooting my scenes outside. Even though I’d had hand warmers providing warmth between takes, my fingers still stung with tremendous pain.
Whose brilliant idea was it to film outside in February?
All I wanted to do was wrap up the day and get home to Holliday.

My perfect night would be to curl up under a blanket with her and drink a bottle of red wine in front of a roaring fire. Well, if I was being totally honest, my perfect night would be having sex with her in front of a roaring fire.

After what felt like twenty takes of me snapping pictures of Heather eating a bagel, drinking coffee, and having a chat with friend in the park, the director, Sam, yelled, “Cut!” Relieved that it was over, I checked my phone for messages. A reminder appeared:
Training session with Gram 5:00 P.M.

I wanted to take up boxing for many reasons, mostly personal. Dean had put me in contact with his trainer, and tonight was my first workout. With a little over an hour before my appointment, instead of going home, I decided to shower and take a nap in my trailer. Glad to be out of the cold, I quickly made a cup of tea and flipped the television on. Before I was able to take a drink, someone knocked at my door—probably Desi with tomorrow’s call sheet. Tomorrow was the last day of filming before the break. In two days, I would be leaving for a three-week press tour for
A London Love Story
.

“Come on in.”

Not Desi, but Heather appeared the doorway.
Fuck!

“Hi,” she said softly. “Do you have a moment to talk?”

Since my conversation with Holliday about Heather and her possibly misreading my signals, I had managed to keep her at a distance. While on set, we hadn’t shared coffee in the mornings, tea in the afternoon, and absolutely no lunches at the same table or restaurant. I’d kept to light small talk and professional discussions.

“Not really. I have an appointment I need to keep, and I’ll be leaving shortly.”

“Please? I just need a few moments of your time.”

I rolled my eyes, and reluctantly agreed to the conversation, knowing she wouldn’t stop asking until she got her way.

“Fine,” I said, turning the television off. “What can I do for you?”