Personal Demons 2 - Original Sin (18 page)

In a flash, Matt has Andrus up against the wall, his forearm across Andrus's throat. The smell of ozone is sharp in the heavy night air, and all the hair on Andrus's arms stands on end.

“Yes,” Matt says, his eyes slits and his face an inch from Andrus's.

Chax charges Matt, his fist glowing red, but I lunge forward and grab his arm as he raises it. I twist him into an armlock and throw him, facefirst, onto the floor.

“Go, Frannie!” I bark.

She and Lili skirt past Chax and out onto the sidewalk, dragging Taylor. And that's when I notice Rhenorian, standing under a burnt-out streetlight across the street.

“Damn,” I say under my breath.

Frannie glances back at me once they're outside. “Luc…?”

“Go!” I yell.

She hesitates just a second, but Lili keeps moving, so she follows.

I plant my knee in Chax's back, feeling his energy surge under me.

Andrus stares Matt down, his demon form flickering through his human shell. “I'm finding the company you're keeping these days to be distasteful, Lucifer.”

“Yeah, me too. But he comes in handy on occasion.”

I peer out the door. Frannie and the girls are nearly to the Shelby. I nod to Matt and we let the demons go, dropping back onto the sidewalk. Matt turns up the glow—a warning that I hope is too subtle for the mortals here to notice. Of course, if he actually starts throwing lightning bolts, that's going to be hard to miss. We back toward the car and I toss Frannie the keys.

Frannie and Lili load Taylor into the back of the Shelby; then Lili jogs with Matt to her truck across the street. I look back at the brownstone and see Rhenorian standing on the walk with Andrus and Chax, and I can hardly wait to find out what fresh Hell the three of them will dream up in retaliation.

Frannie and I dive into the car and close the doors. I hit the gas and we squeal away from the curb.

I glance at Frannie as she drops her face into her hands and sobs.

My heart is in my throat, because I know she blames herself. She doesn't even know the worst of it.

And I'm not about to tell her.

Matt

We get Taylor up to Luc's and he pulls me aside. “She can't know about Taylor,” he says to me with a warning glare, then glances at Frannie as she guides Taylor into the bathroom.

“She has to know. If she insists on trying to save her, she's only going to put herself in danger.”

“And you don't think she's going to try to ‘save' her if she knows Taylor's tagged? It'll be worse. She'll blame herself.”

“You have to tell her,” I say as Taylor retches over the toilet.

“Not yet.”

“Soon,” I say.

Lili comes up behind Luc. “Frannie's got Taylor.” She waves her hand in the direction of the bathroom, and her face scrunches. “And I don't do puke, so I'm outta here.”

“I'll walk you back,” I say.

She looks at me. “It's, like, thirty feet. I think I can make it.”

“I'm coming with you,” I insist as she turns for the door.

Luc scowls after me and heads for the bathroom.

I walk up the hall with Lili. “Did you see the guy? Was he there?”

She shakes her head as she turns her keys in the locks. “I wasn't really looking.”

“I want you to stay away from those guys. Give me your cell number.”

She looks down at her foot and scuffs her toe at a piece of gum stuck to linoleum. “Can't afford one.”

Tendrils of panic snake through me. They're not going to be happy about what happened tonight, and they're already stalking Lili. She's the weak link in the raiding party. A mortal already tagged for Hell. They'll come after her. “I want to know if they come anywhere near you—at work—anywhere.”

She glances down the hall before pushing through the door.

I follow. “This isn't the safest place you could live, you know.”

She spins around and looks at me. “It's all I can afford.”

“No one's helping you out?”

“I've been on my own for a while. And I've got to swing this college thing on my own. I've got some scholarships and financial aid to pay tuition, but my job at the KwikMart doesn't pay much, and that goes for rent and everything.”

I watch as she carefully twists all the deadbolts back into place and heads for the kitchen. She reaches into the fridge and comes out with two Cokes. I pop the top and settle into the couch. “What about your family?” I say.

She slides onto the couch and I feel hot electricity course through me when she curls in next to me. “There's no one I care about. I never knew my mom, and my father…” Her whole body clenches into a hard ball.

There's a tug at my core, like my insides are being ripped out. I want so much to help her, but I don't know what to do. I drape my arm around her shoulders and pull her tight to my side, stroking her hair.

When her tears start, I find myself wanting to kiss them away. But I don't. She buries her face in my shoulder and I let her cry. When her tears slow, I ask, “Would it help to talk about it?”

She pulls her head from my shoulder. “I don't think I could.”

“Well, if you want to—now or later—I have big ears and a small mouth.”

Her lips pull into an almost smile. “Your ears
are
a little big, but your mouth looks pretty perfect to me.” And when she leans in and her lips meet mine, I'd swear I was just hit with a blast of Hellfire. Heat rips through my human form.

I don't know what to do. God knows I've wanted this. I'm completely torn between pulling her closer and pushing her away. But I can't push her away. I can't make myself do it. So I kiss her back. I'm feeling just short of terrified, but as I melt into her, the fire spreading under my skin settles into a warm glow. I deepen our kiss, needing to feel closer, wanting this—my first kiss with my first girlfriend—to last forever.

When she pulls back, I wait for a second, expecting avengers to appear and strip my wings. When they don't, I breathe a sigh of relief and realize Lili is staring at me, her eyes looking as scared as I feel.

“Sorry,” she says. “I thought—”

I stop her with a finger on her warm, moist lips. “You thought right,” I whisper and lean in again.

A thrill races through me at her touch. All my desires flare—everything I want but can't have.

Could I? With Lili? If it's love and not lust, would I lose my wings? Because I
do
love her. I've loved her from the second I first saw her.

I cup her cheek in my hand and bring her face to mine again. Now that the fear is lessening, I can focus on her and how it feels to touch her like this. And as we kiss, what I feel…it's unlike anything I've ever experienced. I feel emotions swell inside me, and before I even realize I've opened my mouth, I hear myself say, “I love you, Lili.”

She leaps off the couch, her eyes wide. “What?”

My heart, if I had one, would be in my throat. “I'm sorry. I didn't mean…”

“You didn't mean it. I know,” she says, lowering her lashes.

I pull myself slowly from the cushions and stand here, not sure what the right reply is. But I can't lie. “I
did
mean it. I'm just sorry if I shouldn't have
said
it.”

She looks even more stunned and backs away a few steps. We stand here, staring at each other for what feels like an eternity, before she turns and runs for the bathroom.

Needing to do something to help her, I follow, but as she reaches the door, she holds up her hand, warning me off. “Just give me a sec, okay?”

I settle back into the couch as she closes the door. I come so close to passing through that wall, invisible, to check on her, but she asked for privacy, so I glue myself to the cushions.

When she comes back from the bathroom, she curls up next to me on the couch. A tear courses a crooked path down her cheek. I wipe it away and kiss her again. “Are you okay?”

“I've just never been with someone who…No one's ever loved me before.”

“I love you,” I repeat, and pull her closer.

She settles into my side and I hold her. And I know this is where I'm supposed to be.

Frannie

Taylor's in the shower, and I have to keep poking my head in the door to make sure she's upright. I brought her to my house last night when she was with it enough to call her mom, and she stayed over. I helped her to the bathroom twice in the middle of the night so she could heave into the toilet, and spent the rest of the night curled around her in the bed while she shook.

I towel off my wet hair and toss the damp towel at Matt, where he lounges across my bed. I pull my robe tighter. “You think Taylor's gonna be okay?”

I'd almost swear anger flashes in his eyes before they turn sad. “I don't know.”

“She's just so…messed up. I think that demon did something to her—I mean other than…you know.” My stomach twists into a hard ball as the image from the party surfaces.

“You'll have to ask your boyfriend about that,” he says, his voice suddenly acid.

My eyes shoot to him. “What would Luc know about it?”

“Everything. He's one of them.”

“Stop it, Matt,” I snap.

His eyes narrow and his voice becomes a growl. “He lies to you, Frannie.”

“He doesn't! But, speaking of lying, he thinks there's something going on with you and Lili.”

Matt doesn't answer. He just lies there, staring.

“So…is there?”

He doesn't look at me. I can see him struggling to get the word
no
out of his mouth, but he can't lie.

I feel myself soften as a flicker of hope tickles my brain. “So, how would that work, exactly? Could you…I don't know…”

He lifts his head and looks dead at me with a rueful half smile. “No.”

“Why not? Luc is with me.” I hear the hope in my voice and I know it's selfish. Is it wrong to hope he can have a life?

“It doesn't work that way. Even if I wanted it—”

“Why not? It's not fair.”

He jumps off the bed, and his glare burns through me. The hair on my arms stands on end as his power surges, and ozone fills the room. His voice is a low growl. “Don't talk to me about fair. That demon gets everything and I get nothing.”

His eyes spread wide and his face pulls into a mask of shock as my stomach drops to my knees. I can't believe Matt just said that. Not only
what
he said, but how he said it. And, from the look on his face, neither can he.

“I…,” he starts, but trails off, shocked speechless. He drops his forehead into his hand and rubs.

“Matt…I'm…” What? Sorry? I lower my lashes and inspect my hands. “It shouldn't have been this way.”

He sits back on the bed. “Well, it is,” he says, sounding really tired.

I ease into my desk chair and look up at him cautiously. “And you're wrong about Luc,” I say, knowing this might not be the right time, but feeling like I need to say it anyway. “He's mortal now. Just like me.”

He heaves a huge sigh, but his eyes stay trained on the carpet. “He'll never be like you.”

“You're wrong. Luc loves me. He's human. He'd never do anything to hurt me.”

“Maybe,” Matt concedes. The corner of his mouth lifts in a weary half smile. “But he can't protect you either.”

“Well…maybe. But you'll lighten up? Cut him some slack?”

He blows out another sigh and looks me in the eye. “As he earns it. I just hope I don't regret it.”

I roll my eyes at him. “If you're gonna be any good at this guardian angel thing, you're gonna need to get a grasp on who the real enemy is. It's not Luc.”

“According to
you.
You're forgetting that I'm the professional. I think I have a little more insight into people's character than you do.”

I roll my eyes again, but I can't stop the smile. “Am I allowed to reassign you?”

Something flashes in his eyes, and for just a second he looks like he might say yes. He pulls himself off the bed. “No.”

“'Cause I really think Taylor needs you more than I do.”

Matt's eyes drop from mine, and he turns toward the window. “I need you to do something for me.” He turns back from the window, and there's something desperate and a little wild in his expression.

“Yeah?” I say cautiously.

He looks up sharply and disappears just before the door cracks open and Taylor drags herself through, wrapped in my bathrobe, her hair twisted into a towel. She still looks like death: tired and too thin, with big purple circles under her dull gray eyes, and skin the color of ash.

“You gonna make it?” I ask her, standing.

“Maybe.” Her voice is sour. She doesn't look at me.

I walk over and hug her, even though that's not really our thing. “I'm not gonna let him hurt you again.”

She pulls away and glares at me, then grabs her clothes off the floor. “Yeah, whatever.”

“You good to go home? You can spend the day here if you want.”

“I'm good.” She yanks her shirt over her head.

I'm not sure what the right thing to say is. I can tell she's not really “good,” but I don't know what to do to change that.

“You're sure you're okay?”

She spins on me and spits, “Just get out of my face, Frannie!” Her face is etched with hatred.

I just stand here staring at her, stunned.

“I'm so sick of you playing holier-than-thou, like you're so seriously perfect or something.”

“Tay, I just want to help.”

“Well, you can help by leaving me the hell alone.” She tugs on her skirt, nearly falling over. She jerks away from me as I try to steady her. “I'm outta here.”

“Tay…”

She turns and glares murder at me on her way out my door. “Get out of my face!”

And all of a sudden, I'm furious. “You have no idea what Luc and I risked getting you out of there.”

“I didn't ask you to. I didn't
want
you to.”

“You don't see what he is, Tay.”

Her eyes darken as her face pulls taut. “I see him just fine. Leave us alone.”

“No. I won't.”

She spins and moves as quickly as she can on shaky legs toward the stairs. “Just fuck off!” she says without turning.

“Fine! You know what? Go to hell!” I yell down the stairs after her.

My words trail into deafening silence as she slams her way out the front door. Mom appears at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at me with a question in her concerned eyes. I just shake my head and turn for my room, where I flop back on my bed and stare at the ceiling. Tears roll down my temples as I realize what an idiot I am. Taylor's not thinking straight. She needs my help.

God, I wish Gabe were here. He'd know what to do. And just as I think it, I smell summer snow and feel something feather soft brush against my cheek. There's an instant of shock and my heart feels like it stalls, but then it picks up double-time as I start to breathe again. I sit up slowly and look around.

“Gabe,” I whisper to the empty room, my eyes wide and heart pounding. But the sensation is gone as quickly as it came, and I'm left feeling more alone than ever.

I lie here forever, wishing for Gabe and trying to decide what to do. Finally, I drag myself off the bed and throw on my old jeans and a T-shirt.

“Mom, I'm going to Taylor's!” I yell on my way through the family room, and don't wait for a response.

I jog to Taylor's, but when I get there and knock on the door, it's Trevor who answers.

“Hey, Trev. Can I talk to Tay?”

“She's not here.”

My stomach drops. “She didn't come home?”

“She was here for like five minutes. Went right to her room. But then that guy with the hearse pulled up. She bolted out to his car and they took off.”

I pull out my phone and dial her number, but it goes to voice mail without ringing. “Shit.”

“What?”

“That guy is seriously bad news, Trev.” I feel bile rise in my throat as I think about what he did to her.

“I've never even seen him. He just pulls up and Taylor runs.”

I back down the stairs. “I've gotta find her. Call me if she comes home,” I yell over my shoulder as I turn and jog toward the sidewalk.

When I get back to the house, I jump in my car and head to Luc's.

Matt

Until yesterday, I hadn't really thought about it since Frannie brought it up a few weeks back. But after what happened with Lili, it's been playing in the back of my mind all day: Frannie's Sway is the only way. If she could use it, maybe I could have Lili—have
everything.

She changed the demon. Why not me?

I can already feel myself changing. I feel things I didn't even know were possible when I'm with Lili.

I glance at Frannie as she drives. She's scowling straight out the windshield, lost in her own thoughts.

I clear my throat, slump deeper into my seat, and start the script I've practiced. “Do you remember when you told me you wanted to make me mortal?”

She glances at me, and her scowl disappears, replaced by caution. “Yeah.”

“I want you to.”

Her eyes widen, but then her face crumbles as tears threaten. “Oh, Matt…you know I want to, but I don't think I can.”

“Why not?” I hear the edge in my voice and hope Frannie doesn't.

“My Sway isn't anything. I thought it was, but…” She shakes her head and looks haunted. “It…I can't do it.”

It's out of pure desperation that I can't let it drop, even though I know I should. “You said you wanted to help me…to make up for what you did. This is your chance.” I feel my face lock in a grimace as sick disgust buries me. I can't look at her. I never intended to say that—play that card. I don't even know where that came from.

When I do look, she glances sideways at me, a tear trailing down her cheek. She scrubs it away with the back of her wrist. “What would I have to do?”

“Just want it, I guess. You know how it works better than me.”

A wounded sob escapes her throat. “But I've always wanted that, even before any of this…” She waves her hand at me. “I've always wanted you back.”

“Maybe that's why I ended up your guardian, but I think you have to want me more than ‘back.' I think you have to want me mortal—human.”

She shoots me an uncertain glance. “I…”

“Just think about it,” I say.

She'll do it. I know she will. I can feel her guilt, heavy and thick, like a blanket over her soul. And as sick as I feel inside, the throbbing ache isn't totally from disgust. Because I ache for Lili, and this is the only way I can have her. Frannie wants it this way. She was the one who brought it up in the first place. The knot in my core loosens as I realize I didn't do anything wrong, really—just encouraged her to do what she already wanted to do.

We pull into Luc's parking lot. She cuts the engine and sits for a long minute before turning to look at me. “I'll try,” she says.

I push out the door before she can see the elation on my face. I'm pretty sure I'm glowing.

She climbs out of the car, and I realize I'm shaking. I can't stop. I want this so much. I can see the picture clearly in my head: Lili in my arms, so soft and warm…touching me, kissing me…

A shudder rolls through me. We could leave Haden. Go someplace where no one knows us. Be together—
really
together. Everything in me explodes into a shower of sparks. Maybe I should cut the demon some slack. If this is how Frannie makes him feel…

I follow her up the stairs and she twists her key in Luc's lock. My soaring heart soars higher when I pass through the door and see Lili, sitting at the table in her gray sweats. Her hair is pulled off her face in a ponytail and she looks…beautiful. Like she's almost shining. Amazingly alive.

But then I see Luc sitting across from her, empty dishes on the table between them. They seem to be engrossed in some intense conversation, and any charity I was feeling toward him instantly vanishes.

I stride over and stand next to Lili. “What are you guys talking about?”

Luc takes a second to respond. His eyes shift from Lili to Frannie and back, and they narrow almost imperceptibly. “Nothing.”

He pulls himself out of the chair and wraps Frannie in a hug. “Lili and I made omelets. Want one?”

My hands grasp the back of Lili's chair so hard, I'm vaguely surprised the wood doesn't splinter. I bite my lips together and swallow the fury that's dying to spew from my mouth. How can Frannie be so blind? How can she not see that he's all over Lili?

I'm choking.

Can angels choke? I have to get out of here.

Lili stands. Her eyes shoot to me then away. “I've gotta get ready for work,” she says. “See you guys later.”

She rinses her dish in the sink and I walk with her to the door, fighting to keep my hands off her.

“I'm heading out too,” I say, waving over my shoulder. “I'll be back.”

Luc eyes me, but he doesn't say anything.

Once Lili and I are in the hall, I don't even pretend. I lace my fingers in hers and walk with her to her door. “Do you really have to work?”

“Not for a few hours.” Her eyes drop and she blushes. “But I was hoping if I left, you might come over.”

I smile as all my senses flare. “I'm over. So are you going to invite me in?”

She turns her key in the lock and pushes the door open. We step through, but before she can close it, her face is in my hands and my lips are moving with hers.

I pull back and gaze down into her amazing green eyes. “Sorry. I had to do that.”

She smiles up at me and closes the door. Then she takes my hand and leads me to the couch. I look for a spot to sit, but she doesn't seem to care that there are clothes all over it. She pushes me down and slides in next to me, pressing herself into me and kissing me again.