Pickles The Parrot Returns: My Continued Adventures with a Bird Brain (9 page)

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Authors: Georgi Abbott

Tags: #pets, #funny, #stories, #humour, #birds, #parrot, #pet care, #african grey

BOOK: Pickles The Parrot Returns: My Continued Adventures with a Bird Brain
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He has a set of stainless steel measuring
cups – all with holes drilled into the handles and strung together
on a chain for hanging – which gives him great pleasure and makes
good punching bags. Whenever he’s angry about something, he beats
the hell out of them. Loud noise perfectly demonstrates his
frustration and nothing makes a louder noise than these.

Pickles doesn’t like puzzle toys. He used to
work at them and did well at it but now he can’t be bothered. It’s
just not worth the effort for him even though it may be one of the
easiest puzzle toys and his favorite treat inside. I guess we could
withhold his favorite treats just to get him foraging but we
haven’t tried it, as it just doesn’t seem necessary - although,
foraging is vital for a parrot.

The foraging opportunities we offer Pickles
are things like hanging veggie/fruit skewers, a hollowed out green
pepper with a hole cut in the side for him to stick his head in and
find pieces of grated carrot or other fruits and vegetables. We’ll
weave lettuce and other weavable food items through his cage bars.
The one thing that keeps him busiest, and also the messiest, is
ripping newspaper into small pieces and throwing it on the bottom
of his playstand over top of hidden snacks. His playstand is 2’ x
4’ so that’s a lot of paper to toss to the floor in search of
treasures. It’s fun to watch him chicken scratching among the paper
too. Sometimes we give him a large, empty potato chip bag with a
nut in it and it will take him awhile to rip it or crawl into it
for the snack.

I pick up cheap cotton gloves whenever I come
across them, put a little snack in each finger and a walnut in the
palm and tie up the top of each finger and wrist part of the glove
with raffia or leather strips. Or I’ll wrap a nut in a piece of
leather, lettuce or cornhusks. Almost anything will do. Pickles
likes small whiffle balls with snacks or beads squeezed into the
holes and it takes awhile to chew a hole large enough to get
them.

He never knows where we might have hidden a
snack so he often goes hunting and investigating, believing they’re
capable of sprouting anywhere.

Color doesn’t seem to matter whatsoever. He
ripped a toy to pieces one time and rather than stringing the same
bright colored beads and baubles back on, I strung plain wooden
ones. He proceeded to destroy it just the same. Let’s face it,
colored toys are meant to catch our eyes, not the bird’s. The same
as fancy colored lures attract fishermen, not fish. Catching
our
eye, clinches the sale. Colored toys
don’t usually scare him but sometimes a toy of some sort will.
Usually, it’s the shape or size or something that’s attached to it
that might be scary to him. If we think that might be so with a new
toy, we will play with it on the couch first and then he’ll want in
on the action. If I’m making a big toy and I think that it might
scare him, I put it all together on the couch – usually with him
helping with the small pieces – so when it’s put together, it was
gradual and he was part of the process as it grew into something
big.

He was helping mama make a toy on the couch
one day – testing bells, tangling rope and tossing toy parts – and
he dropped a piece between the wide gap between two cushions that
was caused from me sitting on one of them. At the time, it was a
great tunnel to dive in to retrieve the toy part – and he did – but
at the same moment, I stood up to fetch a piece that he had thrown
which caused the cushions to snap shut and trap him. I heard a
squawk and turned to see nothing but his little head sticking out.
I rescued him by sitting back down on the cushion to recreate the
cool tunnel and to allow space for him to jump back out.

Once out, he realized he still wanted the
piece that he left in the tunnel and completely forgetting that the
tunnel also doubled as a steel trap, he dove right back in to play
with it. I was feeling a little frisky so I stood up again, but
slower this time so as not to startle him as much as the first
time. He tried to jump back out as the walls were closing in but
didn’t quite make it and ended up pinched between the cushions
again. “Dadddeeee” he cried, ratting me out. I told him daddy
wasn’t home to rescue him. “Daddy be right back!” he threatened. I
lead him to believe his threat had convinced me to release him, and
release him I did by sitting back down on the cushion. He sprung
out of the tunnel, jumped on my knee, ran up my arm and shouted in
my ear, “You go home!” I don’t know where he thinks my ‘home’ is
but I just answered, “Sucks to be you, eh?”

One of the best investments we ever made was
the stainless steel talon bucket. It came with a handle for hanging
but we were concerned that he might get stuck between the handle
and the bucket so we took it off and screwed it into the side of
the cage in front of his favorite perch. Each night we pick up
everything he dropped and put it back in the bucket and we change
it up every few days. It keeps him very busy at night before he
goes to bed and gives him something to do if he gets up in the
middle of the night.

Pickles’ quote, at the beginning of this
chapter, was funny to watch. I had found this cute little pink
rubber piggy flashlight key chain, removed the chain and tossed it
in the bucket for him to find later – he loves digging for
surprises. Later, when he climbed in his cage to go through his
treasures, I watched as he discovered it and said, “What’s THIS?”
and backed up to his perch to play with this delightful little
item. He chewed on it, rubbed it on his face and waved it in the
air with glee but at some point he chewed on the little button and
it flashed in his face! I hadn’t expected it to scare him, but it
did. It flew from his talon as he flew from his cage and he stood
on the top bars, head cocked, peering at the culprit lying on the
paper below. He wouldn’t go back in his cage until I removed it but
I still sneak it into his bucket now and then just to watch him
throw it out in disgust. It’s never scared him since the first time
but they are still mortal enemies.

He seldom empties the whole bucket of all the
toys because he likes to play with each and every one of them, and
there are dozens of things in there – anything from pieces of
leather, to beads and buttons and regular talon toys. But when he
does empty it, he likes to sit on the rim and use it as an echo
chamber.

One evening, it was as if he had decided that
was the only thing he wanted to do. He tossed the toys, helter
skelter, at record speed until the bucket was completely cleared
out. He sat on the edge and all I could see was his twinker up in
the air as he banged the sides with his beak and made any sound he
could think of that might make a good echo. This went on for quite
some time until he let go a loud scream – that African Grey
ear-piercing shriek. Immediately, he went completely still and
quiet – head still in the bucket, twinker still in the air. After I
moment I asked him if he was okay. “Huh?” he asked from inside.
“Did you break an ear drum Pickles?” I asked. “Huh?” came again,
from the bucket. Then I guess ‘huh’ started to make a good echo and
he just carried on saying it, “Huh? Huh. Huh? Huh. Huh? Huh.” -
either that, or he really was trying to hear himself through the
ringing in his ears.

I’m pretty good at strategically placing his
toys and perches so that neither gets pooped on much however, when
he plays with his bucket of toys, some of them get dropped below
and pooped on over night and in the morning, the poopy ones get
thrown in a nearby basket to clean once it’s full. At one point, I
got a little behind in washing them and the basket got full so I
was putting them in a plastic bag next to the basket. Pickles
decided he really wanted to inspect the bag so he climbed down from
his cage and headed over while Neil was watching TV. Neil didn’t
notice until Pickles started rustling around and told him to
get back up!
Pickles dropped it,
reluctantly, and headed back up his cage but the moment he noticed
Daddy was preoccupied; he headed back to the bag. Once again, the
rustling alerted Neil who told him again to
get
back up!
“Daddy bad” said Pickles as he fluffed up to pout
on top of his cage, but he stayed put after that.

After awhile, Neil went to the kitchen to
make coffee and when he returned to the livingroom, he found that
Pickles had dragged the bag to the middle of the floor and had the
toys scattered all over the carpet. “Pickles! No!” Neil told him
“Get back on your cage”. Pickles didn’t head for his cage this
time, instead, he ran after Neil’s hand as Neil was picking up the
toys and yelled “No. No. No.” at each toy that went back in the bag
and tried to grab them before Neil could. Neil’s yelling ‘No’ while
Pickles is yelling ‘No’ and they’re both fighting over the
toys.

Pickles finally resorted to grabbing the bag
and hanging on to the bottom of it while yelling at Daddy as
Daddy’s filling it up. Neil finishes inserting all the toys but
Pickles ain’t letting go of that bag and he ain’t gonna step up on
Neil’s hand. He just clung to the bag, refusing to relinquish, so
Neil plunked the bag down on the floor with Pickles beneath, upside
down. Still, Pickles clung to it.

The staring contest began. Each glaring at
the other; waiting for the other to concede. Pickles gave up first
but not without a fight. He jumped out from under the bag and right
on top of it. Finally, Neil had to get the snack bowl of pine nuts
to bribe him off and as Pickles went for the snacks, Neil picked up
the bag. After Pickles had a couple of snacks, Neil told him to
get back up
and at first, Pickles just
stood at Neil’s feet looking up, waaay up, wings splayed, glaring
at Neil but finally stomped over to his cage and climbed back up to
the top to pout again. “Neil” he said with disappointment and Neil
seemed to think he even shook his head slowly in disgust. I
wouldn’t doubt it.

Almost every toy comes with a warning about
not leaving birds unattended with them. Whether you buy or make a
toy, there are always risks with any of them. It’s a hard rule to
follow. I mean, why do we buy our birds toys? Because everything
we’ve learned is about the importance of playing, chewing for beak
conditioning, foraging, enrichment – everything to keep a bird from
getting bored and maintaining good mental health. And when are most
birds bored? They’re bored when they don’t have toys or stuff to
chew on, they’re not getting attention or we’re not around to
entertain them.

There’s almost always somebody home with
Pickles but what about people who work, or go out a lot? What if
you have to leave the room? Are we going to remove every single toy
each time? For us, that would be a major job both coming and going
– especially since Pickles is not caged when we leave. It just
can’t be done with us. We know the risks and try to make everything
as safe as possible – cutting off loose strings and threads, making
sure ropes and chains aren’t long enough to strangle himself, and
always checking chain links to make sure they’re tight enough so
they don’t catch a nail or beak tip. And still, sometimes things
can happen.

In nine years, Pickles has only once been in
danger with a toy. We were sitting on the couch when Pickles
started screaming and we immediately jumped up to see what was
wrong. It was difficult to tell because he was half holding on to
the bars at the top of his cage and half holding on to a hanging
toy. Neil put his hands in to cup him and keep him from flailing
around and ended up getting some nasty bites until he could manage
to unfasten the toy from the bars and pull them both out together.
By the time he got Pickles out, he and the toy had separated – if
in fact, they ever were stuck together. We don’t know what happened
but we tightened everything up anyway. I don’t know what would have
happened if we weren’t home; he might have been seriously injured,
or he may have got loose on his own. Maybe he wasn’t even stuck,
perhaps he was just playing and we mistook the screams for fright.
So yes, we are always aware and concerned but there’s only so much
you can do. Its like having kids – it’s impossible to protect them
at all times.

When it comes right down to it, toys aren’t
all that important to Pickles – other than his talon toys at night
and his bells – as he ages, his toy playing becomes more and more
infrequent. Nowadays, he prefers hanging out on ropes, swings,
boings or his fun factory.

Chapter 7
Just Hangin’ Around


When you get a new branch
on your playstand, make sure there's room for a Flap
& Flip all the way around it.  Otherwise it's just called
a Face Plant.”


When mommy leaves me
on the kitchen counter and says "Be right back", then she
should be right back.  If she isn't, she shouldn't be
surprised to find her yucky cookie in the soapy dish
water.”


I had to help mommy with
the laundry. Chores, chores, chores.  There was
a pile of dirty laundry on the table next to the chest freezer
where I was supervising.  When she had her back turned, I
sorted it for her and punctured nice little decorative holes in
some of the towels.  My work here is done.”


I was hanging upside down
on my perch and I thought whoa, what if the blood all rushed to my
head and poked a hole through the top and started oozing out. And
then when I stood up, the top of my head would be red like my tail.
And then mom would walk in and say 'hey,cool'.”


I love my boing, boing,
boing, boing.  The wall hates it when I swing on it though,
cuz it hits me when I go too crazy.  I think it's just
jealous.”


Daddy should save his beard
& mustache for me whenever he shaves it off.  I'm going to
market them as preening items for birds.  And then, we
can stick food in them, just like daddy does.”

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