C
HAPTER
38
Shanice
I
was praying the entire flight to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. I had to look on a map to even find out where it was. It was by Texas and Kansas in the middle of nowhere. I wouldn't have gotten on the plane if I didn't really like Jabril.
I told Adrienne I needed time off to take care of some modeling stuff. I was really going to see my boy. I don't think she will miss me that much. The club has got so much bad press that it hasn't been real crowded like it used to be.
I landed in Oklahoma and then took a twenty-minute cab ride downtown to a hotel called the Colcord. It was a really nice place. The gentleman at the door insisted on carrying my luggage even though I said no several times. I didn't have to sign anything at the front desk because they were expecting me. The clerk handed me the room key and told me to have a good day. The man carrying my luggage showed me to the elevator and my room. I thanked him, he slipped the key into the slot, and the key lock kept turning yellow. He knocked on the door and Jabril answered.
“Hey, you made it. I didn't think you would be here already,” he said.
I walked in the room to see that Jabril had this Asian chick in short red booty shorts already lying on the bed. From her facial expression I could tell she wasn't happy to see me, either. I know I'm a freak, I always will be. I'll even fuck two dudes together, but bitches, that's just not my thing. I had flown all these miles to see Jabril, and I needed all of him to myself.
I was a little mad at him for having this other girl here. She got off the bed swishing all around the room like she owned it and wanted me to see her little perfect shape. I took a seat on the bed and sighed really loud.
“I'm hungry, Jabril. What are we going to eat?” she complained.
“All right, chill, yo. We can all go get something to eat.” He finally noticed I had an attitude.
“What's up, Shanice, are you okay?” He looked over at me, trying to check my temperature.
“I'm fine,” I lied. I wanted to leave, but I didn't know what time the next flight was. I really had thought Jabril was different. He just saw me as a freak, too. Did he think I was going to fuck him and her together? Why else would he bring me here when he already had a girl with him? Jabril kept looking over at me. It was obvious I wasn't with this whole situation. He came over to me and pulled me over near the bathroom.
“Are you sure you are okay, Shani? I feel like something is bothering you.”
“Not really, but I'm here to see you, not her.”
“So, should I make her leave?” I wanted to scream, “hell, fucking yeah,” but I just remained quiet. He then answered his own question and said, “Okay, no problem. It's done. I'll make her leave.” He walked back over to where she was sitting and said, “Hey, sweetheart, I'm going to call you.” She looked at me, rolled her eyes, and then packed up and left.
I couldn't control my anger. I was so upset with Jabril that I blurted out, “Next time don't have anyone else here when I come to see you.”
“I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything by it. That's just a chick I'm cool with that wanted to stop by and check me out. Sorry about that.” He held me down on the bed and snuck a hug so I would no longer be mad.
“So, what's up? What do you want to do?”
“You brought me out here. You tell me.”
“We can go get something to eat or something.”
“I'm not hungry.”
“What we should do is go to my house and chill. No one is there.”
“I am not going to your house.”
“No, my house is empty. My mom and my girl are on vacation. I sent them to the islands. My chick is pregnant, and I don't want her to do anything stressful, because our last baby died.”
“That's a shame.”
“It was. I was messed up about it for a long time. But we getting a second chance at it. Where is your family? What's your story? I know you are Shani Amore, but what did you do before the club and the videos?”
“I don't have a story. ”
“Everybody has a story, like, where is your parents and sisters and brothers?”
“I never met my dad, and my mom is in jail. I'm the only child.”
“Oh.”
“Yup, my aunt raised me and my cousin, and I was just figuring out life before all of this.”
“So your mom is in jail. What did she do?”
“She killed her boyfriend, and she is not getting out any time soon. I haven't seen her in over ten years. She doesn't write me or allow visits. That's why I want to do better for my daughter.”
“You got a kid?”
“Yeah, she is five. Her name is Raven.”
The conversation was getting too personal, so I asked him about himself. “So, you are from Camden.”
“Yup, and it is real rough. So, I know about hard times and people going to jail, so don't feel no type of way.”
“I don't. I just don't want to talk too much.”
His phone rang and he jumped up and said, “Hold up, that's my girl.” He spoke to her for a little while, then came back to the bed with me.
He took his T-shirt and hat off, and I was all over him, ready to take off my panties, but I couldn't get his full concentration because his phone kept ringing. She was getting on my nerves. He needed to relax with all the phone calls. She was annoying as fuck. He put her on the speakerphone and she would be rambling about the dumbest shit.
“So, what's up with your girl? Why does she keep calling you like that?”
“We had some issues before, and now we got back together and she feel like she got to call me all the time to make sure I'm not doing anything. Her friends are probably in her ear. She is a little insecure right now.” He showed me a picture of her and I was not impressed. I guess he could tell because he said, “She's not all fancy, but she is mine and she loves me for me. But that doesn't mean we can't have fun, you know, but she is the one who has my back. I'm supposed to have a ride or die in my corner.”
“So, you always cheat on her?” I questioned him.
“No, I love my girl, but honestly, she not nasty like you.”
“So, I'm nasty?”
“Yes, you are very nasty and I like it. Come back over here.” He playfully grabbed my waist.
We talked more about his uncle, his mom, and his family, and he asked me why I let Raven live with her grandmother.
“Because I was young and I didn't have my life together yet. I miss my daughter sometimes. Her grandmother doesn't have full custody. I do, but she makes it hard for me. It's just a lot.” I felt myself getting kind of emotional so I paused.
“We talking, Shani. Like I said, I understand. My dad died when I was young, and my uncle helped raise me.”
I felt tears streaming down my face. “I don't know. I just feel like my mom not being there was so crazy. I missed her. I know if my mom was around, I wouldn't have made all the mistakes I did. Like having a baby early. My aunt let us do whatever we wanted. She should have been the one who said, no, it's too late to go out, or no, you have to go to school, but she was always like our friend. My mom would have made sure I went to college and did something with my life.” I started crying. “I wish she would let me come up and see her. You probably think I'm crazy. Sorry for crying.”
“It's okay, Shanice. I mean, I don't judge you for anything that you do. You kept it real with me from the beginning. So, when are you going to get your daughter and move?”
“My goal is that by the time she is in the first grade, me and her are going to get our own house.”
“That's what's up, but listen to this. You seem cool. You know I have a situation, and if you play your part, then we can do us and I can make sure you and your daughter get a place now.”
“You will?”
“Yeah, the season over anyway. I'm coming back home, and I'll set you up somewhere in Philly.”
“Okay.”
The entire weekend he showed me a great time. We went shopping, and I went with him to the car dealership and helped him pick out a new car. He wasn't just all about busting all night. He held me and we talked. We made loveâwe didn't fuck.
C
HAPTER
39
Zakiya
T
urks and Caicos with Nichelle was a peaceful, well-deserved trip. My first trimester was over, and I felt like I had energy and could do things again. Claudette didn't even really bother me too much. She had her own room and made friends with other singles on the island. While we were away, I talked to Jabril five times a day. He acted like he couldn't function without us being home. He was so bored without us that he even went and bought a new carâa Bentley GT. I can't hate. It is a nice car, but then he said no one could drive but him. He is having it shipped, and we were going to fly home to Philly next week.
I am so glad the season is over. I'm going to spend time with my family and Jabril. We had a lot of packing to do before we left.
While we were gone, Omar decided to go home. He was suffering from the jitters. Christie sent me a long text thanking me for being there for her. She said Omar was acting like nothing ever happened and they were good again.
Omar went home just in time because a few days later Christie went into labor. We rushed down to the hospital to be by their side.
“Congratulations, man,” Jabril said as Omar gave us both a hug. He had a cigar in his mouth and let it hang out like an old-time gangster would. Whatever jitters he had, apparently he was over them. He walked us to a small waiting room on the Labor and Delivery floor. His friends and parents were all enthusiastic and waiting for the birth of his daughter. This was how all children should come into the world.
“Omar, how did you know it was time?” I asked.
“We were sitting watching television. Then she jumped up and said she thought her water broke. I was so scared. I just grabbed her bag and we came down.”
“Well, congrats. I'm happy for you.”
“Thanks. Let me get back there to see what's going on. They might need me to cut the cord or something.” We laughed with him and had a seat.
Ten minutes later, Omar came down the hall crying, his mother running after him. I looked at Jabril. I didn't know what to think. Jabril ran to catch up with him. My immediate thought was that something was wrong with their baby. Did her baby die like mine? Was she cheating on him and the baby was obviously not his? All these scenarios popped in my head. I just bust out crying because I knew whatever it was it couldn't be good.
“What's going on? What happened?”
Jabril came back, grabbed my arm, and said, “I told you that bitch was crazy and that we all needed to stay away from her.”
“What did she do? What's wrong with the baby? I don't want to leave her like this.”
Jabril yanked me down the hall toward the elevator. He pushed the DOWN button on the elevator and I think what whatever was going on affected him, too.
“Zakiya, she wasn't ever pregnant.”
“What do you mean, she wasn't ever pregnant?”
“She lied. There is no baby, she made it up! That sick, psycho chick made it up.”
“I don't understand. We saw her stomach and everything. She looked pregnant.”
“But she wasn't. The doctors said it. There's a name for that shit.”
In front of the hospital Omar was on his cell phone with tears falling from his eyes. I felt sorry for him. I couldn't believe she had gone through all of this and did not have a child. I began tearing up, seeing him so hurt and also knowing she had fooled me. Jabril approached Omar to try to talk to him, but he kept venting.
“She in the room smiling, saying she sorry. She sorry! I tried to leave that bitch. I tried! I wanted to do the right thing, but I knew I should have left her ass. I gave up everything for that crazy bitch. The doctor tried to explain the condition she had, a hysterical pregnancy some shit. But I can't listen to that mess right now. I don't want any counseling. I don't want anyone. I need to get out of here because the way I'm feeling, I might kill her. Tell my family I'm out.” Omar got in his car and sped off. I stood confused.
“But I don't get it. I saw her stomach! She was huge and I felt it,” I said, trying to make sense of it all.
“I told you, Zakiya. You have to stay out of other people's problems.” There was nothing I could say to Jabril. He was right and I was wrong. Christie had played us all.