Project: Killer (Project Series Book 1) (4 page)

maggie

Today was yet
another bad day. Roger had ended up beating the shit out of Diesel in gym class, and somehow, I had known something was wrong once he didn’t show up to class. I excused myself to the restroom but headed straight to the boys locker room. There he stood leaning against the far wall of the bathroom his arms clenching his midsection. His eyes grew large as he took me in.

“You shouldn’t be in here, Maggie.” His voice was weak, he was sweating profusely, and he looked more exhausted than I had ever seen him.

“You didn’t show up to American Lit, so I assumed something was wrong. Looks like I was right.” I tried to keep my tone out of the smart-ass area, but it didn’t work. From the look on his face, he didn’t seem to find it funny either.

“I don’t need your help. How many fucking times do I have to tell you that?” He was as livid as he was most times I came running to his rescue. Honestly, I couldn’t tell you what it was that made me come back for more. Every time I helped him, it was like being stung by a bee. Every time I stuck my fingers into the warm honey, I would get stung. Eventually, the pain subsided and didn’t feel nearly as bad as going without the honey. I guess I looked at Diesel like that.

“Looks like you’re going to have to tell me one more time because I didn’t hear it the last thousand other times,” I joked, walking over to him. He stared at me a darkness settling into his eyes. This was the part where he would try to threaten me. Try to convince me how being friends was a weakness he couldn’t afford and if I didn’t stop, he would hurt me.

It was always a lie. I could call his bluff by now. Sometimes, I would think the tumor was finally getting to him, that he was actually losing parts of his mind only because he would tell me the same thing every single time I did something for him.

“Don’t,” he growled as I reached a hand out to steady him. His clothes clung to his sweaty body as a groan sounded from deep within his chest.

“Just let me help you,” I said ignoring his shoves. He was weaker than I was—that much I knew.

“I said no,” he yelled, his voice hurting my ears. His hand reached out and grabbed my arm gripping it in a manner that would’ve scared me—should’ve scared me.

“I said yes.” I gritted my teeth gripping him under the arm as I lead him to the bench. His grip on my arm slacked as I sat him down, his head leaning back against the tiled wall.

“Go back to class, Maggie. We go through this every fucking day. Every. Fucking. Day. You tell me I need you, I tell you I don’t. When are you going to understand this infatuation you have with me is going to get you hurt?”

Infatuation? What was he talking about?

“Infatuation? Are you kidding me? I help you because it’s the right thing to do and because regardless of how the others treat you, I know you deserve more than just to be picked on and beaten. I mean, look at you now…”

“Fucking Christ, Mags, just leave. Leave while you still can. I’m dying. Hell, I should already be dead. I’m losing my mind, my memories, and my thoughts every single day. Every breath I take, every morning I wake up, I’m that much closer to death. So please cut the shit and walk away. It’s been years, and I’m barely hanging on by a thread. A fucking thread, Maggie. A. THREAD!!!” he bellowed. His face was red in frustration as I took a step away from him, my back hitting the lockers. I had seen him angry. I had seen him cry, but I had never seen his hate turned on me.

“I just wanted to help you,” I mumbled. It was the plan the whole time—to be a friend to him when he needed one most.

“Don’t. Stop helping. Stop caring. Stop it all. Because if you don’t stop, I will force you to stop.” He stood, breathing heavily.

I wasn’t sure I could handle a day without Diesel. Maybe that was the problem he was getting at. I was using helping him as an excuse to hide the fact I was already attached to him. He never wanted me to get attached to him because you can’t attach yourself to death. He wasn’t trying to hurt me. He was trying to protect me.

I jolted awake, a sheen of sweat covering me. Fuck, another memory. Another nightmare. I felt as if I would be plagued by them for the rest of my life. As if not knowing what happened to him was my own personal hell.

He died, Maggie. He fucking died, and there was nothing you or anyone else could do.

Tears threatened to spring from my eyes. I loved Diesel with every piece of myself. I just wish I would have been strong enough to tell him how I felt much sooner than I did. That way, we could have spent more time loving one another, showing each other in every aspect how deep that love ran. Suddenly, my cell phone started to ring. My mind was a boggled mess as I searched the bedsheets for it.

My hand landed on it as I pulled it out from under my pillow. Kandace. Fudge sickles. I hit the answer key and waited for the bitching to ensue.

“Don’t tell me you were taking a nap…” she yelled into the phone.

“I…”

“Actually, you better have been taking a nap. You’re pulling an all-nighter.” She interrupted me not even giving me a chance to speak.

“Thanks for telling me what I’m doing tonight,” I said in a smartass tone.

“No problem. You best be ready in T-minus thirty minutes. I will be at your apartment to pick you up then.” Thirty minutes? She had to be kidding.

“Really, I just wanted to stay in and—”

“Read a fucking book. I know, I know.” She finished my sentence for me. I needed to come up with better excuses.

“Whatever. I’ll be ready,” I said giving up. There wasn’t any point. I had no other excuses. It was time for me to socialize a bit, to step out of my comfort zone.

“Good,” was all she said before hanging up on me. I slithered from my bed and walked to the bathroom, pulling on a pair of skinny jeans along the way. It was only eight. I had slept for three hours… crashing the moment I had walked into my loft apartment.

Finding a sparkly blouse, I slipped it on and then pulled my black boots on. I tamed my dark brown hair by putting it in a braid and applied a small amount of makeup. My brown eyes reflected back at me, and I felt as if I didn’t know myself.

The more and more I thought about what had happened with Roger, and what Kandace had said, the more it dawned on me that maybe I wasn’t really doing the right thing. There were other ways to help find a cure for something. You didn’t have to go into a highly secretive corporation, get into their labs, and find out what it was they were doing that no one else was.

Was it actually worth it to endanger my life, my future of getting an answer for something like this? Then again, what were they hiding? People didn’t just threaten others without an intention of protecting something.

A pounding sounded on the door just as I walked from the bathroom to the nightstand to grab my phone. Wow, for the first time ever, Kandace is early. Walking to the door, I pulled it open.

Kandace stood before me decked out in one of the sexiest outfits I had ever seen her wear. Her blonde hair was curled in banana curls, long ringlets falling down her back. She was wearing a black corsage top with red lace embodied through it. Paired with it were a denim mini skirt and a pair of killer black heels. She looked far from the clubbing kind of gal.

“Are you done judging me?” She smirked, her voice holding a tone of amusement. It astonished me how I had become such good friends with her. We were polar opposites in every single way.

“Never. You’re going to hell just for wearing that little piece of clothing right there,” I joked pointing at her top. Her tits were all but falling out of the top. Yeah, she was getting lucky tonight.

“As long as there are hot as fuck men there, I’m okay with it.” She smirked.

“Oh, they’ll be something hot there. I don’t know that it’ll be men though.” I giggled. I felt like I had already had an entire bottle of liquor. It had to be the nap.

“Well, you act like you’re getting summoned to heaven, child. Do you ever show your body off?” She was teasing me in a bitch kind of way. It didn’t matter to me what Kandace thought. I would wear whatever I wanted, how I wanted.

“Yes, Sister Kandace. Now, let’s get the hell out of here.” I ushered her out the door grabbing all my shit along the way. Tonight was going to be stellar. All I had to do was push the thoughts of him to the back of my mind.

***

Music blasted from the speakers of the club so hard I could feel the beat of the music in my bones. Strobe lights covered the dance floor in every color imaginable as we made our way over to the bar. My eyes caught on everything in the dim lighting. It was as if I was under a spell. I had been missing a lot.

“What do you want to drink?” Kandace yelled into my ear over the music. I wasn’t sure what I wanted to drink. I hadn’t been out drinking in a long ass time. The closest I got to enjoying alcohol was a glass of wine every now and then, and this place—yeah, it didn’t look like it served wine.

Instead, I shrugged my shoulders unsure of what to get. As I gazed around the room at all the people dancing and talking, I forgot about my drink.

“Here, slut.” Kandace shoved a glass into my hands. It looked like murky ocean water, and I was unsure if I even wanted to bring my nose near it let alone my lips.

“What the hell is this?” I asked still looking at the glass sideways.

“It’s called LA Water. Some of the bitches at the end of the bar were drinking it. I didn’t know what to get you so I just went with it.” She shrugged taking a sip from her glass, which looked somewhat appetizing.

I brought my nose to the edge of the glass to smell it. The aroma of liquor and sweet fruit hit my nostrils. She had to be fucking crazy if she thought I would drink this. You could smell the hangover on this thing.

“What are you drinking?” I questioned. Hers looked like a frozen margarita but better. I wondered if she would trade beverages with me.

“Mine is called a Cocksucker in honor of all the assholes I have to deal with at work.” She smiled around the straw in her mouth, and once she took notice of my not so drunk state, her look turned to a glare.

“Drink, Mags. It’s not that bad. If those bitches can handle it, then you know you can. I’ve seen you sling back whiskey shots… It’s not that bad.” I wanted to laugh. She was right. Back in the day, we had gotten into my parents alcohol, and eventually, I became one of the most notorious shot drinkers in high school.

“Ugh, fine, but if I’m drunk tomorrow… and it carries into Sunday, then you’re explaining to Roger why I’m not at work,” I growled bringing the cold beverage to my lips. The coolness was relief that was much needed.

As the first drop of alcohol touched my tongue, an explosion of flavor went off in my mouth. There was no strong taste, just a fruitiness that was almost addicting. Before I knew it, the whole thing had been downed.

“Slow down, Cowboy. I need you to leave this place on your feet, not on a stretcher.” Kandace halted me from ordering another drink. I wanted to pout. Was the drink already affecting me?

“Whatever. I’m a big girl, Kandace.” I walked around her and up the edge of the bar where the ‘bitches’ were sitting. Their attention was on a group of youngish looking men in the back booth.

I told the bartender what I wanted and then averted my attention back to the table. At it sat four gigantic men. Their faces were covered in shadows, but even from this distance, I could tell they were bigger dudes.

“Yeah, Jaxon always comes here… He fucked me once but then said he couldn’t anymore.” One of the girls said, sipping her drink, and eyeing him up like a piece of meat.

“What about his friend… Killer?” the blonde asked with a glint of curiosity in her eyes. I wanted to roll my own eyes at them and their apparent need to pick men up at the club.

“No clue. I mean, his name is Killer. That alone should scare you away. He doesn’t really say anything, and he doesn’t interact with any of the other ladies,” the brunette went on. The bartender handed me my drink, and I turned around to face the dance floor my eyes still lingering toward the booth of men. Why couldn’t I just go dance or something? Why did I feel the need to stare at them?

Taking a gulp from my drink while praying it would give me some type of liquid courage, I watched one of the men get up. His body reminded me of Hulk without the green. His hair was in a man bun, if that was even possible, and his eyes immediately met mine. My breath faltered, and my heart beat out of my chest. It couldn’t be. It had to be the lighting or my eyes playing tricks on me.

There was no fucking way Diesel could be standing across the room from me.

killer

I hated club
nights. Scouting for the piece of shit lab assistances and other workers of the Corporation. The music was loud, the chicks never shut the fuck up, and the booze did nothing to elevate the monster inside of my head.

“I need to take a leak,” I mumbled to Jaxon, who had chick number two on his lap. Greg told us going out in public wasn’t a good idea. He feared that if someone noticed us, someone from our past, it could cause problems. By problems, he meant they would have to be taken care of—which I had no problem with. If there was someone from my past who saw me and knew me, I would gladly take them out.

After all, if they truly loved me, then they wouldn’t have let me suffer. I got up from the booth, pushing past Savage and Yankee. I had just stepped out of the booth and onto the carpeted floor when I felt someone staring at me. Immediately, my eyes lifted to meet a very shocked, but slightly timid pair of dark brown eyes. I could practically hear her heart beating out of her chest.

She clutched the glass in her hand as if it were a lifeline to reality. I didn’t have time to figure out what she was staring at or what she wanted. Hell, she could just be someone who wanted to have a one-night stand with a beast. There were many of those crazy fucking people out there.

Yet, as I took a step away from her, I could feel my own heart rate spike. My palms began to sweat, and my eyes flickered around the room. What the fuck was wrong with me. Ignoring the tugging that I felt in my chest, I hustled to the bathroom. Pushing past a couple, who were all but fucking in the hallway, I made my way to the men’s bathroom.

It wasn’t until I was done and washing my hands that a piercing pain in my head hit me.

Brown hair. Brown eyes. A dazzling smile. She was a breath of fresh air on a hot summer day.
I shook my head fiercely, willing more to slip from my mind. How could it do this to me? How could I only remember bits and pieces of my life? I clenched the soap dispenser and didn’t release it until I heard the snapping of plastic.

Deep-rooted chaos was going off inside of my head. It felt like an atomic bomb was about to go off, and I couldn’t hold on any longer. Opening the bathroom door, I pushed through the masses of people. I came to a stop when I felt a small form run head-on into me. I clenched my fists forcing myself not to reach out and touch them. I was feeling violent. There was no saying it would just be a simple removal—maybe of their heart or intestines.

“Oh, I’m so, so—” The young woman’s voice cut off as she looked up at me. Up close, I could really see her. It was the woman looking at me before I ran off to the bathroom. Was she following me? My blood boiled, and my body begged for some elevation of the hate. Calmly as I could, I reached out and grabbed her by the shoulder slamming her into the nearby wall.

“Why’re you following me?” My voice wasn’t my own. Then again, I didn’t know what I used to sound like. Her eyes grew wide, full of shock and fear. I could practically see the lie forming in her mind. I wanted to smile, but instead, I wrapped my hand around her throat. Leaning into her body, I caught her scent. She smelt delicious, like chocolate and strawberries.

“Listen really carefully to what I’m about to say to you…” I whispered in her ear taking notice of the way her body responded to my own. Her heart rate accelerated telling me she was scared, but there was something else there.

“I wasn’t following you, I swear. I was—”

“Shhhh…” I gripped her around the throat tighter. I had killed women. Not that I had wanted too, but in the moment of rage, I did what I had to. Most of them deserved it.

“You’re lying. I can tell. I can hear the spike in your pulse, the way your eyes rolled around as if you were searching your mind for an explanation. The fact it took you a moment to answer me when it was a simple yes or no question.” I lifted my head to look into her eyes.

My hand wanted to grip her harder. To bring the lies to the surface without asking questions. Yet, I couldn’t allow it. Something held me back, and that just made me even more fucking angry.

“I… I thought I recognized you.” She stuttered over her words. My eyes drifted down to her red glossy lips. She was beautiful. Almost as beautiful as
her.
The girl in my memories. Fuck, I needed to stop.
Stop thinking about it.
I told myself.

“You think you know me? Who the fuck is it that you work for?” I growled, my fingers digging into her throat. She reached up, her small hands prying at my fingers to stop. She was begging me with her eyes because she couldn’t do so with her words. Forcing myself to ease off, I allowed a breath of oxygen to enter her lungs.

“I work for no one. I just thought I knew you. Obviously, I don’t.” She struggled to get out. Her eyes told me she was lying, but her words—her words made me think differently. Releasing her, I shoved from the wall, not even a backward glance going her way. I needed to forget about her. About the brown-eyed girl who caused me to live in hell.

“Wait… What’s your name?” The girl called out running after me. Did she have a fucking death wish? I stopped dead in my tracks turning around to face her.

She stayed where she was standing, probably sensing if she came any closer, it would be the end of her life.

“No.”

“What do you mean no?” Her voice held confusion.

“Killer.”

“Killer? That’s not a name.”

“You’re right, it’s a job. A thing.” I took a step forward, and then another, eventually coming face to face with her. She had balls of steel. I could rip her apart right here, right now.

“A thing?” She was questioning every word that came out of my mouth. Aside from the anger and rage I was feeling, I was slightly amused by her reaction.

“It’s what I am. A killer, and it is what you will be if you don’t walk away from me right now,” I whispered for her ears only.

“A killer?”

“No—killed.” A shudder worked its way through her body as she looked at me as if I were fucking crazy. I couldn’t blame her, but the truth was—I
was
crazy. I was so fucking crazy it wasn’t even funny.

“You can’t just kill people,” she kind of said to herself. I laughed… my body shaking with humor. Did one of the guys set her up to this? To see if I could handle not losing my temper out in public? If so, they were about to make some money.

“I can. I will. Not only that, but I do. Now run along, sweetie.” I narrowed my eyes at her, my eyes growing dark with a warning. It would be the last one she got.

I watched her body sway with fear as she took a step back. Her fists were clenched, and there was a burning anger right under the surface of her emotions. She wanted to lash out at me. To scream. Oh, I could make her scream.

“Maggie, is this guy fucking with you?” A blonde walked up to her hooking their arms together. I looked at her sideways. She had a disgusted look on her face as if I would approach her friend.

“No. No. We were just done talking,” the woman who now had a name said. Maggie. I racked my brain for a memory, anything that could connect me with this person. She said she recognized me, but she didn’t say from where.

“All right, then. Beat it, dude.” The blonde pushed her friend back as if I were going to attack her. I sneered, on the verge of ripping into this bitch.

“Why don’t you go back to wherever it was you came from?”

The blonde’s mouth had hung open for a moment before she snapped it closed, her eyes turning dark.

“I don’t know who the fuck you think you are, but—” The bitch stepped forward causing my blood to sing. I almost wanted to get my hands on her just to see what kind of fucked up shit I would do.

“Kandace, enough…” Maggie butted in, interrupting her. I glanced at the blonde, and then back to Maggie again.

“No, this fucker doesn’t talk to women like that,” she said to Maggie before directing her attention back to me. “Did your Momma not raise you with manners, asshole?”

“Kandace, it’s fine.” Maggie stepped in front of her, shielding her body from mine. As if removing me from her sight would get her to calm down. Maggie had balls, but at least with hers came a dose of common sense. The blonde was just fucking dumb.

“No, it’s not, men don’t talk to women like that. It’s the twenty-first century, asswipe,” the blonde yelled directly at me, her eyes narrowing in anger. Maggie was holding her arms back as she tried to push through her.

“Is it? I couldn’t tell. You’re complaining about me not respecting you or your friend, yet do you see what you’re wearing?” Nothing she could say to me would penetrate the ice covered tundra called my emotions.

“Did he just call me a slut?” the girl asked her friend, astonished. I was done with this shit show. Instead of responding, I turned around and walked back toward the table. What happened next, I never saw coming.

“Hey, asshole.” I heard the voice of the Kandace girl behind me and whirled around to face her. Her fist was raised and coming toward my face. The impact of her knuckles touching my skin didn’t hurt. There was no pain, only anger and rage that she had been dumb enough to think she could touch me.

I didn’t take notice of the prying eyes around us or that Maggie had grabbed her friend and pulled her away from me. Instead, all I saw was fire and hate. I was fueled and ready to go.

My hand shot out, gripping Maggie by the throat. If she wanted to take her friends place, then so be it. “You should have let me walk away the first time. You dragged your friend into our little mess and now you want to take her place. Huh? Is that it? You can’t save everybody. It’s time someone taught you that.”

My fingers dug into her delicate skin. I could feel the blood pumping through her veins and the screaming of bystanders as I gripped her tighter.

“Killer.” My name was being called, but I wasn’t releasing the girl. No way in fucking hell. I was going to finish this.

“Let her go.” Jaxon’s voice entered my ears, but I didn’t care. I just squeezed harder. A pain deep in my chest formed. It radiated down my arms and into my hands. I could hear her gasps for breath and see the flutter of her eyelashes as they closed. I could feel the slowing of the blood in her veins as her body began to shut down.

“People are watching, Killer.” Jaxon’s warning reminded me of the pain I could endure again. My hold on her went slack as I brought her into my body. She was breathing, barely, but she was. The crowd around us was watching intently to see my next move, to see if I would slaughter her.

I could practically hear their whispers.

“What have you done?” The blonde screamed, tears forming in her eyes. Why was she sad? She was the one who had done this.

“Give me the girl,” Jaxon ordered. So I did. I released my hand from her throat and gave her to him. Something in my chest was giving way to the person that I was. I could feel a fracturing of my coldness falling away.

Why?

Pain spilled through my head forcing another memory through.

“You were a good person, Diesel. You deserved the best in life. I know I never told you this… that I waited until it was too late, but I love you.”

No! No! She couldn’t love me. Who was Diesel? Why couldn’t I remember who I was?