Promise Me Forever (11 page)

Margie and Elvin, wide eyed and scared to death, shook their heads.

Jon dished out his cell phone. “Guess we should call them.” He walked away from the others and talked to 911. Jon stood far enough away from the car so the responder didn’t hear the guy banging on the trunk for help. He didn’t need the cops come in with their guns ablaze.

Twenty minutes later the four stood by the RV as the cops let the man out of the trunk. One of the officers walked over to question the group. Abby handed him the diamonds then gripped her stomach. “I’m not sure where they belong, but they are stolen.”

“Abby you okay?” Jon asked, concerned. He noticed she held on to her stomach a few times while they waited for the police to show up.

She nodded. “Yeah, I think so. I’m afraid in the scuffle when he was trying to get the diamonds from me, he may have kicked me or hit me in the stomach a few times. I keep getting these nasty cramps. They come and go.”

Jon reached out and brushed his knuckles over her cheek. “Hey. I’m sorry he hurt you. I’m not sure fighting him like that was a good idea.” Jon tried to control his anger when he saw the man jerking her around. It was all he could do not to pound the guy in to the ground. He stopped because he was afraid he wouldn’t be able to. Abby cringed and grabbed her stomach. He noticed the drops of sweat at her temple.

“I’m sorry, I’m afraid it hurts bad.”

Jon didn’t hesitate but picked her up in his arms and took her to the car. “I need a direct line to the ER,” he told the cruiser blocking the car. “She may be hurt.” Jon put her in the front seat and jumped behind the wheel. The back up cruiser put on its lights and siren and led them out of the parking lot toward the highway. It wasn’t too far to the Fisherman’s Hospital but if she took a blow to the stomach she could have internal injuries.

“Ugh!” Abby cried. “Oh Jon, I feel something wet.”

“Don’t panic baby. I’ll take care of you.” He turned on the interior light and checked her face. She was pale and frightened, her eyes wide, filled with liquid that pooled there. He began to assess her from head to toe and then he noticed the spot between her legs. A large patch of blood soaked through her shorts.

“Fuck,” he whispered.

Chapter 9

Jon paced back and forth, back and forth, again and again. He knew there was not much to worry about and she would be fine in the hands of the physicians here but a fear so deep in his gut drove him on.

“Doctor Hatfield, you’ll wear a hole in the floor.” One of the nurse’s stood in the doorway of the waiting room. It was small and cozy, with a few seats and a sofa covered in cushions. A glass coffee pot sat in one corner, the smell stagnate after being left on the burner for so long. She walked over and flipped the switch. As she picked it up to empty the pot, she smiled at him. “She’ll be fine, she’s in good hands.”

A trickle of sweat slid down Jon’s temple. He nodded but didn’t want to talk to anyone right now. Not even his own brother. There was never a time when he couldn’t call Jake. But today he couldn’t because the fear of what he had to do overwhelmed his soul.

He sat down in front of the window and pushed his clenched fists in to his eye sockets.
A baby! She was going to have their baby! She doesn’t even know what happened, and he has to be the one to tell her. How was he going to tell her?

He went over the last few hours again and again. When the cop cruiser pulled up to the ER, Jon was right behind him. By the time he got her to the door, Abby passed out in his arms. She woke up from time to time as they took her to get an exam and ultrasound. Jon stayed right by her side the whole time. He knew in his gut what happened when he saw the blood. After the ultrasound, they rushed her in to surgery for a dilation and curettage procedure to remove the rest of the fetus left in her uterus.

She didn’t ask what was going on and he made the staff promise not to tell her, to let him be the bearer of bad news. She wanted a baby so bad. He realized in his heart, he did too. Jon got up and paced again. As a doctor he knew to be point blank and tell the truth. Patients expected him to be honest, but he wanted to lie to her and tell her it was internal bleeding.

Would his conscience let him get away with telling her a lie? Jon rubbed his jawline and stood at the window looking out in to the parking lot. He was desperate and a fool. She deserved the truth, but he was afraid it would do so much damage she would never get over this.

He was torn in two. If he tells her the truth she may blame herself for losing the baby. He didn’t want that to happen. If he lied, she would find out sooner or later, and he was stupid to think he could look her in the face and lie to her. He knew truth won out every time. He didn’t know what he would do.

His back leaned against the cold window and his eyes drooped closed when a nurse called on the phone in the waiting room. “You can come back, she’s awake.” Jon ran to the double doors and pushed them open. He didn’t know how long he waited but it had been hours. He knew he looked like hell but didn’t care. All he wanted was to see Abby.

She was in a private room on the maternity ward. He walked down the hall and it felt as if he were so far away with each step he took and he needed to be near her now. A baby wailed inside one of the rooms as he walked by. Jon swallowed. He stared straight ahead, determined not to look at another baby again or try to think about a child right now.

“Hey.” She held her weak hand out to him. He clasped it in his own and bent down to place a kiss on her lips. They were warm and soft and he missed them in the short time she was away from him.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

“High. They gave me some great medication. I don’t feel a thing.”

Jon nodded. Perhaps it was good she couldn’t feel too much right now. He was about to upset her world and a sob almost escaped from his throat. It came up from his gut and tried to get out but he punched it back down. “I’m glad you’re okay.”

She cocked her head. “Jon, what is it? I can see in your eyes something is wrong. Look at me?” When he raised his eyes and looked in to hers, she gave him a smile so sweet he almost fell apart.

He was speechless. How the hell would he say the words that would tear her world apart? “Abby,” he whispered, his throat constricted, his voice husky and so low she lifted her head closer to his.

“Jon, please. I’m okay. I had some bleeding, but they fixed me up good. Guess that guy was meaner than I expected.”

Jon tore his eyes away from hers. He took a few steps back and took a deep breath. “Jon, what is this?” He turned back to her and sat on the edge of the bed. He closed his eyes and opened them, her eyes still on him, full of trust.

She believed in him, she trusted him with every ounce of flesh. It seemed easier to let her think she bled internally. She would never know the difference. But the trust in those eyes, they dropped him to the ground.

“Abby, I love you baby. I don’t know how to tell you this so I have to come right out with some bad news.”

She brushed a soft hand over his cheek and held it there. The warmth from her fingers seeped in to his being and he leaned in to her hand and closed his eyes. These words would forever be the hardest words he ever had to say.

“Tell me what’s wrong. Why are you so sad? I love you Jon.”

“Promise me what I have to tell you will not destroy you?”

He opened his eyes to see her puzzled look. She reached out her other hand and placed it on his shoulder. “Destroy me? What do you mean? Jeez Jon, I had some internal bleeding. It was almost like I had my period and oh! oh! no!” Her eyes widened in horror.

She shook her head. He grabbed her hands and held them. Her eyes got so wide when she looked at him. “It can’t be Jon. Please don’t tell me I had a miscarriage? I didn’t know! I didn’t know! Oh how could I not know!”

Jon held her hands as she sobbed and tried to talk at the same time. “It’s been so hellish these past few months I never realized I didn’t get my period. When I think back, it’s true. How many months? Jon, how many?”

He took her in his arms. “Three. It must have happened right after the tornado. When we got the hotel room and didn’t have protection.”

She shuddered in his arms and cried, soft, disturbing sobs that sounded as if she couldn’t get them out. She rocked back and forth, her eyes closed, her head in his chest until the effects of the surgery and exhaustion from crying wore her out.

He sat on the side of the bed as she laid back on to her pillow and stared at the ceiling. He tried to talk, but she ignored him. “Abby, please. Say something.”

She looked at him, her eyes empty. “It’s my fault,” she choked out. “I killed our child.”

Jon stood up and walked to the window. He knew from a doctor’s experience she was distraught and nothing he said made a difference. She would believe it was her fault until she could see reason but he still needed to try. He swung around and faced her. “It’s not your fault. You didn’t know.”

She stared at him. “I should’ve known. How can you look at me, your child’s murderer? I can never forgive myself Jon, never and you won’t be able to either. I don’t know what to do.” Tears fell down her cheeks. Jon watched her cry. He didn’t want to touch her because he was afraid she would fall apart and yet he needed to hold her close and keep her with him.

Jon tore himself away from the window and sat back down on the bed. He placed his hand under her chin and forced her to look at him. “I know you blame yourself but I’ll never think you were at fault. You didn’t now you were pregnant when you went after that man. What you did was brave. He was wrong to hit you. It is not your fault.”

She looked at him as if he talked nonsense. “I put myself in danger, like I always do. I’m no good for anyone. Don’t you see, I cause nothing but heartache, pain, death and destruction all around me. You better go Jon, please, go away. Stay far away from me.” Her words started so strong and then faded away as tears fell and she shook in his arms.

“I won’t let you go through this alone. Don’t ask me to leave again because I won’t,” he told her. “I love you Abby. Love don’t quit. I won’t quit.”

“Then you are a fool Jon Hatfield.” She turned her face away and sobbed in to the pillow. Jon sat there and watched her, let her know he wasn’t going anywhere. He held her hand and stroked her cheek. The tears came and went and hours later he still sat there by her side. Her eyes fluttered shut and Jon sighed with relief.

He moved to a chair by her bedside and continued to touch her hand as it lay by her side. He stroked her fair skin, circled the pulse at her wrist as it beat steady and slow while she slept.

“We can have other children. I promise baby.”

<><>

Jon still held her hand, his fingers entwined with her own, his now still but she could feel the warmth of his skin against hers. As if a huge burden lifted itself from her chest, she let out a breath of air and turned to him. He leaned back in the recliner, his head to one side, his chest rising and falling as he slept. He still wore his scrub coat from the urgent care center.

Abby studied his profile and pictured a little boy with a clump of dark hair like his. She sniffed because she blamed herself for losing their son. How would he ever forgive her, how would she forgive herself? As reality set in, Abby knew she should not have left the car without Penny, but when that man tried to hurt Margie, she forgot about rational thought and wanted to stop him. Why was she being punished for wanting to help someone weaker than her?

Was helping people putting the ones she loved in danger? Even if she didn’t realize it at all? The sad part was Abby realized she didn’t get her period the past two months. The first month she spotted some, but when she called her gynaecologist, the doctor said it could be stress from her recent loss and it may take months until she was back to normal. She told her to keep an eye out and call if things didn’t get back to normal. After that call, Abby forgot. She busied herself with life and tried to forget about Kevin.

Now she had a death on her hands and it was all her fault.

She pulled her hand away from Jon. It stirred him awake, and he opened his eyes. He tilted his head to see how she was doing but Abby didn’t want to talk to anyone. “I want to go home.”

Jon stared at her. He didn’t say a word but got up and left the room. A tear slipped out, and she swiped it away and took a deep breath. No more tears! She would never be so weak again.

She loved Jon with all her heart but she didn’t know how they would ever get through this.

A nurse came through the door. “We’ll release you to Doctor Hatfield today. I need to take out your IV and we’ll give you instructions for the next few days at home, okie dokie?”

Abby gave a nod. “Okie, dokie,” she whispered.

<><>

She knew they watched every move she made but still didn’t care. If she had to block every person she loved out of her life, she would do so if it meant she couldn’t hurt them ever again. They didn’t understand the burden she carried. Her Mom and Dad looked at her with pity as if they could fix her broken heart. She let them hug her and tell her how much they loved her but when it came down to it, they were better off if she stayed far away from them.

Jon treated her so delicately and tried to help her when he was home. She didn’t want his help, she wanted no one to need her or touch her right now. Abby kept a distance from him and he sighed and told her how much he loved her. She stared at him and didn’t say a word. What was there to say?