Promise Of The Wolves (21 page)

“You need to trust me, BreLan,” Girl said. “This is part of who I am.”

Outside the old woman’s den, Ázzuen’s sniffing became more insistent. I hoped no one noticed. I heard another sound from above. Tlitoo was nearly upside down in the roof opening of the shelter, clutching the edges with his feet. I sighed. Just for once I would have liked to not have someone watching everything I did.

“Come to me, young chosen wolf,” the old woman said. I walked slowly back to the pile of furs, and lowered myself to my belly so that I met her at her level.

“You have been wondering, I think,” the old krianan said to me, “why you are different, why you are drawn to us. My granddaughter is drawn to you as well, you know.”

I looked at Girl. She was looking down at her furless feet, which she had covered in prey skins against the cold.
TaLi
, I thought, not just Girl. If she could try to use my name, I could use hers.

“There is a reason you are called. Will you not ask your friends to join us?”

Marra and Ázzuen didn’t await my invitation. They must have been sitting right at the entrance. At the old woman’s summons, they came quickly into the shelter. Ázzuen gave me a defiant look. They greeted the old woman respectfully. Marra lay by the fire and placed her face in her paws. Ázzuen greeted BreLan, who at last relaxed his guard and lowered his sharpstick so he could stroke Ázzuen’s back. He smiled the humans’ bared-tooth smile and sat with Ázzuen as if he had never been upset or threatening. Ázzuen sat beside him and placed his head on the boy’s feet.

“You are BreLan’s friend, I think,” the old woman said to Ázzuen. “And you are friend to these two,” she said to Marra. “I welcome you both to my home.”

The two of them looked at TaLi’s grandmother, rapt. Marra stood and stepped deferentially to the old woman, then sat down at her feet. TaLi and I sat a wolflength away, allowing Marra to inhale the old woman’s scent. Tlitoo abandoned his perch on the roof and flew down to stand beside the old woman on the pile of bearskins. She took seeds from a skin sack, and gave him some.

The ancient human watched us all, for such a long time that I began to feel uncomfortable.

“It is perhaps too soon to tell you this,” she said at last, speaking hesitantly, “but I think I have no choice. I will not live forever, and something must be done, and done soon.” She took a deep breath and when she spoke again her voice was strong.

“So hear this, young wolves. It is no accident that you have found my granddaughter and BreLan. Wolves and humans are meant to be together.”

I couldn’t hold back a whuff of surprise. After everything we’d been told about staying away from humans, about how it was one of our three unbreakable rules, I was shocked to hear the old woman claim with such certainty that the opposite was true.

“Many of my people no longer believe this to be so,” she continued, “and I would not be surprised if yours deny it as well. But it is true, and it is more important than you can imagine. If humans do not have contact with wolves, with the keepers of the wild, we forget that we are part of the world around us. It has happened before. And when it happens, humans begin to kill and to destroy, for we do not see that when we harm the world we harm ourselves. The one way—the only way—that humans can be stopped from killing countless other creatures, from devastating our world, is if we remain always in contact with the wolves, for only wolves can bring out in humans the knowledge that we are neither different nor apart. This bond goes back for as long as humans and wolves have lived in these lands.”

Ázzuen grunted and Marra stood as if to protest. My head buzzed with confusion. It went against everything we had been told, everything our pack believed. It went against the very reason the Wide Valley wolves lived.
You must stay forever away from them. You must shun their company,
Sky had said to Indru. And when the wolves failed to do so, the Ancients had nearly ended our lives.

I stared at the old woman. I had thought my feelings for TaLi were wrong and unnatural. Now this wise and ancient human was telling us that it was not so, and that so much of what we’d been told about the humans—and about our own history—was untrue. How could I believe her? And yet, more than I had wanted anything for as long as I could remember, I wanted to believe every word.

“Yet it is not as simple as that,” the old woman said. “For we cannot be together.” She took a deep, labored breath, as if telling us this exhausted her. TaLi left my side and went to sit beside her and the old woman ran her hands through the girl’s head fur.

“When wolves and humans come together, appalling things can happen,” the old woman said. “My people have tried to make slaves of yours, and your people have killed our kind. We
must
be together, and yet we cannot be, for every time we have tried, war has come to us. That is the challenge—the paradox—and it is the great test of both wolf and humankind.”

I shook my head hard. I didn’t understand how it could be that wolves both must be with humans but also must not. I whined a little.

“Wolves lose themselves,” Ázzuen said, repeating Rissa’s words from so many moons ago. “They are no longer wolf and kill or are killed by humans.” His gaze, resting on the old woman, was thoughtful, almost as if something he already knew had been confirmed.

“Yes,” the krianan said, ignoring our surprised looks when we realized she had understood Ázzuen, “and many humans cannot see another creature without resenting its freedom and wishing to control it.” She reached across TaLi to place her hand on Marra’s chest, which was heaving in excitement and anxiety. “For a time, we had found a solution—a way humans and wolves could be together without causing a war. Some of us humans are better able to be with wolves than others. We are not so threatened by the power and wildness within you. We have no wish to control you, and because of that can be open to what you can teach us. The krianan wolves come to us—to those of us who are meant for the wolves—when we are very young. That is how I know of this. Mine came for me when I was younger than TaLi. You know these krianans; they are the wolves who watch over you.”

I remembered the scent of Greatwolves that surrounded the old woman’s shelter. They must be the krianan wolves she spoke of.

“That would mean we don’t have to give up the humans,” Marra said, her voice barely a whisper.

“I told you the Grumblewolves were keeping secrets,” Tlitoo quorked.

“We meet with the krianan wolves each time the moon is full in ceremonies we call Speakings,” the old woman said, “and the krianan wolves remind us we are part of this world. We, in turn, tell our people what we have learned from the wolves. This is the story that has been passed down by our people for generations. Each human krianan teaches the next, as I have been teaching TaLi.”

She paused and placed her hand upon TaLi’s cheek, and then spoke very softly. “But the Speakings have ceased working as they should, and there are many things the krianan wolves will not tell us. We don’t know why this challenge, this paradox, exists. We don’t know how it came to be that wolves must be with humans and that humans cannot be with or without wolves. And we do not know why the Speakings are no longer working. The krianan wolves know, but they think we humans are too stupid to understand. But I can see that we are failing. No krianan wolf has come to a human in many years, and I have known of no new ones to be born in my lifetime. Now the last of the krianan wolves grow old, and my people do not want to listen to them, or me, anymore—and I do not know what to do.” The ancient voice quavered and TaLi took the old woman’s hand in her own. The old woman held out her other hand to me.

“When I heard that you had come to TaLi, Silvermoon, I knew that something was changing. Perhaps you are what will replace the krianan wolves, and you and TaLi will be watchers together.”

I wanted to go to her, but I was rooted to the spot. I couldn’t just ignore everything my pack and my leaderwolves had told me. Rissa and Trevegg had taught me everything about being wolf—they had never lied to me. And even though the old krianan was TaLi’s family, she was a human. She was not pack. A frustrated grunt escaped me.

The old woman held out her hand to me once again, and I went to her. Marra stepped aside to give me room.

“I can see you do not believe me,” the old woman said. “Why should you?” She thought for a moment. “You must come to the Speaking, in two nights’ time when the moon is full,” she said. “TaLi will bring you. Just you, Silvermoon, not your friends. I think hiding the three of you would not be easy.” She gave me a tired smile, and I licked her hand to let her know I understood.

“Good,” she said. “I will expect you.”

The old woman looked at all of us and her smile broadened. “I refuse to believe that hope is gone,” she said. “I see you together and I know that something can be done.” She gave a deep sigh. “I am tired now, youngsters, and you must leave me. But we will speak again.”

Then the old woman closed her eyes and seemed to melt into the bearskins and her breath grew deep with near-sleep. TaLi and BreLan bent to press their lips to the old woman’s cheek and crept from the shelter. Ázzuen, Marra, and I each touched our noses to the old woman’s hand, and then followed our humans from the shelter, walking as quietly as we could.

The snow had stopped falling while we were in the krianan’s home and the sun warmed the ground. TaLi and BreLan led us a short distance away toward a grassy field.

“Do you believe her?” Marra asked as we followed a few steps behind the humans. “It’s completely different from what Rissa and Trevegg told us.”

“I don’t know what to believe,” I said. “I don’t know why Rissa and Trevegg would lie. But I don’t know why the old woman would, either.” I didn’t want her to be lying. I wanted it to be right for me to be with TaLi.

“She could just be wrong,” Marra ventured. “She didn’t know about the promise Indru made, or about the Ancients. Or about the long winter.”

“But don’t you see?” Ázzuen said excitedly, stopping and turning to face us. The three of us halted, letting the humans get ahead of us. “She has to be right. That’s why the legends never really made sense. It doesn’t make sense that the only thing we were supposed to do is to stay away from the humans. Why close off a whole valley just for that? Why didn’t Sky kill the wolves and humans like she said she would when wolves came together with the humans? And you saw how angry Rissa got when I asked her about it.” He was shaking with excitement. “It’s never made sense to me and now I know why. The Greatwolves are trying to keep something from us, from all the wolves in the valley. I think the old woman is telling the truth.” He looked over his shoulder at BreLan’s retreating form. “I know she is.”

The three of us stood silent for a moment, thinking of everything the old woman had said and watching our humans walk ahead of us. Thinking about what it would mean if she was right.

“We shouldn’t tell the pack about this,” Marra said. “Not until we know more.”

“No,” I agreed, “we shouldn’t.”

“We’ll help you get away from the pack and go to the Speaking,” Ázzuen said.

“And you can tell us what you learn,” Marra agreed. “Then we can decide what to do.”

“Yes,” I said, uneasy at drawing Marra and Ázzuen further into what could be trouble. “All right.”

TaLi and BreLan had found a patch of grass that was free of snow and not too damp. We slowly walked to join them. TaLi sat and reached out her arms to me. Shaking off as much of my worry as I could, I lay down beside her, suddenly craving her touch.

TaLi immediately rested her head against my back. Ázzuen and BreLan relaxed next to us, and Marra curled up between us. Tlitoo, who had stayed behind with the old woman for a few minutes, soared across the field to land beside me.

“I am going away,” he said. “I will be back as soon as I can. You must wait for me.”

“Where are you going?” I asked, startled. I had gotten used to having Tlitoo around.

“Away,” he said. “Outside the valley. Do not do anything stupid while I am gone.”

He raised his wings.

“Wait,” I protested.

“Just because you are stuck on the ground does not mean I must be, wolflet,” Tlitoo said irritably. “Your lack of wings is not my problem. I must go now.”

With that, Tlitoo leapt into the air and flew toward the mountains. Soon he was no more than a speck in the sky and then I saw him no more. I sighed. I knew better than to try to figure out what went on inside that raven brain of his. TaLi leaned harder up against me. I had an itch in my left ribs, but I didn’t want to move for fear of disturbing her. I liked having the warmth of her pressed against me, liked feeling her heartbeat and her breath.

“That’s why I cross the river, Wolf. Silvermoon,” TaLi said, shyly using her new name for me. It was close enough to the true meaning of my name that I liked it.

“I
am
afraid sometimes to cross it,” she admitted, “but I must. My grandmother’s too old to do so now. And she is the krianan, the spiritual leader of our tribe, and I am to take her place when I am grown.” I nosed TaLi in sympathy. Many of us were afraid to cross the river, but a hunter must go where the prey runs. I admired TaLi for overcoming her fear to do what she must.

“I should be living with her now,” she confided, “but HuLin, the leader of our tribe, does not want me to go to her. He says she is silly and does not understand how we need to live now. Krianans used to live with our tribes, but the tribe leaders don’t like having them around anymore. They say the krianans won’t let them hunt enough.”