Protect Me: Oakville Series:Book Three (8 page)

Finally, he turns to face me with a small smirk on his face. Great. He’s gonna laugh his ass off at me. Just like I thought. “Do you know what it is I’ve always wanted to do?” he asks. Now he’s gonna put a guilt trip on me? I shake my head no and he continues. “If you laugh at me, I’ll punch you in the face,” he says sternly. “I’ve always wanted to open my own bar and grille. A cool place to hang out and see live bands. A place where I can play whenever I want. As long as we’re being honest, I hate L.A. I want to go back to Oakville. I really miss small town living.” That sounds nice. Perfect, actually. A small town that’s quiet and peaceful.

“Do you need a bartender? That sounds like the kind of place I’d like to work at.”

After talking for a few more minutes about his ideas for a bar, we decide to talk to Marcus and Angel. To everyone’s surprise, none of us want to sign that deal. We were all just doing it for each other.

“A small quiet town sounds like the perfect place to raise a family. I proposed to Taryn last night and we both want children soon. I’m up for getting the hell out of L.A.,” Marcus announces with a shy smile.
Wow.
I knew they were serious, but I never saw this coming so soon. It’s great, though. If he’s happy, then I’m happy for him. After we all congratulate Marcus on his engagement, everyone turns to Angel. I can’t see him ever leaving here. Especially not for some sleepy town in the middle of nowhere. He’d run out of women to sleep with in the first twenty-four hours. He’s worse than me when it comes to sleeping around, plus he’s not as picky.

“What the fuck are you all looking at? Like I’d stay here if you all left. Besides, I’ve gone through all of the available women in Los Angeles, along with some who weren’t technically available. A change of scenery might not be so bad,” Angel quips before heading off after his latest conquest. We watch him, all of us stunned silent. I’m not sure whether it’s his cockiness or the fact that he would go just to be with the three of us that has us so surprised. The four of us have grown close over the last year; it’s inevitable when you spend so much time together. Kyle and I have become the closest, though. Marcus opens up very little about himself or his past and when he does share, it’s never in great detail. Angel is very closed up. All we know is he was born and raised in L.A. and has no family. He’s never tried to open up to us and we’ve never pushed him. The four of us are all broken or damaged in one way or another. We all fight demons from our past every day, and some of us, like Marcus, deal with them better than the rest of us. We don’t need to pour our souls out to each other to know we have one another’s back, no matter what the situation. Kyle is the only one who has a good family, or any at all, left, so that is what we’ve become to each other — family. These guys are like brothers to me, and all of us wanting to go to Florida to help Kyle start his dream seems to have somehow strengthened that bond.

Three months later, our four-vehicle caravan is pulling into Oakville. Angel and I both traded in our classic muscle cars for large SUV’s, in order to haul all of our gear around. Marcus and Kyle traded their little crappy cars in for big four-door trucks. I always knew Kyle had a little cowboy in him because of those old cowboy boots he always wears, but Marcus buying a pick ‘em up truck was a surprise. At least with the bigger vehicles we had no problem bringing everything we needed with us.

Kyle wasn’t exaggerating when he said this was a very small town. I’ve only seen one stop light. Suddenly, Kyle hits his brakes and pulls into the parking lot of a restaurant. We all follow because we have no clue as to where we’re going. The place looks old and like it’s been closed for years. As soon as I come to a stop, I notice the “For Sale” sign in the front of the building with a “sold” sticker across it. This can’t be the place he bought. It looks like a shit hole. He said the place he bought needed a little fixing up. This place looks like it needs a bulldozer and a fresh start.

We all get out of our cars. Marcus, Angel, and I are just looking at each other with ‘what the fuck?’ looks on our faces as Kyle rushes to the front door. Shrugging my shoulders at the guys, I slowly follow. When Kyle turns around, I see a sparkle in his eyes I’ve never seen before. The excitement is pouring out of him so rapidly, I can’t help but be excited with him. He’s like a kid on Christmas morning showing off all of his new toys. Talking a mile a minute, he’s pointing out everything about this place that holds special memories for him. And now it all makes perfect sense. This is where he used to hang out with his girl. The one who crushed him. The one he’s still in love with. He’s still holding out hope that she’ll come back to him someday. I don’t see that happening, but who am I to say? I don’t know anything about this girl. There’s this little pain in my heart when I think about how much he must love her. I’m a little envious of the fact that I’ll never be able to feel that. Even if my heart were whole enough to allow it, my head certainly wouldn’t.

“So, what do you think?” Kyle questions, breaking me from my pity party. Luckily, I heard most of his ideas for renovations. I didn’t see it at first but after hearing him explain it, I do.

“It’s perfect. This place is going to be awesome,” I tell him as he smiles wide. This is truly making him happy, which makes me happy. I think we’re all going to like it here.

“H
OLLY
!” R
AY
barks as he searches for me. His footsteps are getting closer and his voice angrier. My heart is beating so fucking hard, I’m afraid he’s gonna hear it and find my hiding place. When he’s like this, he won’t stop until he passes out or gets bored. The last time I locked myself in the bathroom, I figured he’d bang on the door for a while then go to bed. No such luck. It infuriated him more and he kicked and punched the door until he broke right through it.

A few weeks ago, I loosened the screws in the air conditioning vent along the wall in the hallway. I knew it would be easy for me to fit into and one place he wouldn’t think to look. It’s a trick I learned over my eighteen years of being tossed around from one foster home to another — the next always worse than the last. I learned quickly to never show how I was feeling about anything. No matter what was being done to me, I never gave them the satisfaction of knowing it affected me in anyway.

“You are going to be sorry when I find you. The more I have to search, the harder it’s going to be on you,” he hisses as he stops right in front of the vent. Through the slats in the vent, I can see Ray clenching his fists tightly. Silently, he stands there, waiting for me to make the slightest noise and clue him in on where to find me. He’ll get what he wants if I don’t get my damn breathing under control. My chest is tightening, making it even harder to calm down and control the fear and panic surging through me.

I should reveal myself. He’s right. My punishment will be worse when he does get a hold of me. Normally, I would take the beating without a single tear being shed. Waterworks, as he calls them, only infuriated him more. This time is different than all the other times he’s used me as his personal punching bag. For once, I have a reason to want to protect myself. For the first time in my life, I have the one thing I’ve always wanted. For someone to love me, no matter what, which is something I’ve yet to experience. For the longest time, I thought Ray was that person. But his true feelings became crystal clear the first time he introduced his fist to my face.

Oddly enough, telling Ray I’m pregnant is what caused his rage. Here I was thinking it would be happy news. How stupid of me to think my husband would be overjoyed, or at least excited, that he’s going to be a father.

How the hell did I get here? How did this man, who I once loved so fiercely, turn into the monster searching for me now? And when did I become the weak woman who hides? We weren’t always the people we are now. He was the sweetest, most romantic guy there was. I was a tough girl who wouldn’t take an ounce of shit from anyone. He wasn’t the type of guy who would beat on a woman and I sure as hell wasn’t the kind of woman to sit back and take it. This is not how I envisioned my life turning out.

But, really, what the hell did I know? We dated all through high school. He was the only real boyfriend I ever had. Every girl in school wanted to be with him. He had it all. Quarterback of the football team, looks, a well-to-do family, the sweetest personality…I felt so honored that he even looked my way. Never in a million years did I think I was good enough to be with someone like him. I realize now I must have had chump stamped on my forehead. He knew a girl like me would do anything to be with him. And with my low self-esteem issues, no family, and no money, I could easily be controlled. It’s just too bad I couldn’t read him as easily as he could me.

“I’m quickly running out of patience. You don’t really think this will be forgotten do you? Come out now and I’ll show some mercy. Keep hiding and I will hurt you so badly, you’ll be begging me to put you out of your misery.” The vicious tone in his voice causes my body to shake. The smallest of gasps slips past my lips before I can stop it. Suddenly, I can’t breathe. For the first time in six years, I can feel tears pooling in my eyes. When I see him turn around and start walking toward me, my entire body begins to shake uncontrollably.

He walks slowly, drawing my fate out for as long as he can, knowing it’s terrifying me. The small space that was my safe haven only minutes ago, feels as if it’s closing in on me. Abruptly, the vent cover is pulled away. Ray leans down and looks me in the eyes with such an evil expression on his face, I’m afraid I went too far. He might actually kill me this time.

I don’t have a chance to think about it because he grips my ankles and yanks them hard. The force slams me to my back as he pulls me from the vent. I gasp for the air knocked from my lungs. My head is spinning while the wheels are turning in his. He’s planning my punishment. My first offense was getting pregnant without permission. The second was running and hiding when he began to hit me. How can I stop him? He wouldn’t actually want to hurt his own child, would he?

“I’ve told you over and over again, Holly, I will not share you with anyone. That includes some needy baby. You would no longer have time to take care of me the way you should. That’s just not acceptable,” he explains as he snatches me off the hallway floor by my hair, sending a blinding pain through my head. I squeeze my eyes shut, praying I can keep the tears at bay as he drags me to our bedroom. Even though I’m probably going to make him even angrier, I have to try. My baby’s life may depend on it. I take a deep breath to try to calm myself as much as possible.

“Ray, please don’t hurt our baby. I swear, I didn’t do this on purpose,” I plead. Swiftly, he spins around and kicks me right in the face. The force snaps my head to the side so hard, my tooth flies across the room and lands just in front of the dresser. The coppery taste of blood fills my mouth, making me nauseous. I swallow it down, too afraid spitting it out will only anger him further. I pray it doesn’t come back up.