Protecting My Hart (Protectors Series Book 1) (41 page)

“Hi, baby girl. I love you so, so much.” Lilly opens her eyes and looks at me.

“Look at her eyes, Tesoro.” His voice so soft but Lilly looks at him as he speaks and his words falter.

“Eyes like her Daddy. I love you, Slyde.”

“I love you too, Hartley.” He leans down and gives me a gentle kiss. “Do you feel up for some company?”

“Yes please!” I grin and Slyde sends a text. A few minutes later, Leia comes in with Ethan, Kash and Beamer behind her. Slyde goes to pick up Ethan and brings him to the bed and sets him down next to me, telling Ethan to be gentle.

“Ethan, meet your baby sister Lilly.” Slyde introduces them.

“Hi, my pretty Lilly. I’m your big brother Ethan. Daddy, she is so small.”

“Yeah, buddy, she’s gonna stay small for a long time.”

“Momma, she is pretty like you.” Ethan smiles at me.

“Thank you, sweetie, she is very pretty.”

“Beautiful is more like it.” Leia states and she leans down to give me a hug. I hand Lilly to Leia, and smile as Leia just coos to her. “I’m your Auntie Leia; I will make sure you always have fashionable boots.” I laugh along with Leia, who is fighting back tears.

I get hugs and congrats from the guys too. Kash is next to hold Lilly, followed by Beamer. I have to say I love watching as three big, tough, alphas fall completely in love with a little baby girl. Man, she’s only been in this world for an hour and she already has them all wrapped around her finger. Ethan watches her, standing next to each of the guys as they hold her. He is already so protective and I find it absolutely adorable.

I pull Slyde to me and he leans down for a kiss. “Thank you, Slyde, for giving me all of this. You ended my nightmares and made my dreams come true. I love you.” I whisper to him.

“I love you too, mi Tesoro. Eternamente. No more nightmares, Hartley, just happiness.” He steals another kiss, before we turn our attention back to our family. Family, something I never thought I’d have so much of, and now I don’t know what I would do without any of them. I watch them all as they continue to fall in love with my daughter.

Leia’s eyes are glued to Beamer who is holding Lilly again, and I can tell that she is fighting back more than just tears. She must feel me looking at her. She smiles and takes her niece back. Her whole demeanor has changed now, and I am more than curious. Her eyes meet mine again and I can see it. She has a secret. Time to find out what it is.

Hi!!!! It’s so nice to see you all again and if this is the first book of mine you have read welcome and thank you!!! I hope you enjoyed this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. These two characters are my favorite I think. They came out of nowhere and I fell in love with them so quickly. Their story is unlike any that I’ve told before and it took me places that I thought I would never go to as a writer. I hope you stay tuned, I’m currently working on Beamer’s book and I’m pretty sure we are going to get Cash’s story as well. If you turn the page you will find an excerpt for Protecting My Love (Beamer’s book) Along with and excerpt from Backdraft by Morgan Nicole!

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Black

The color of the midnight sky. So beautiful with the stars shining bright.

Black
.

The color of Darkness.

I was always afraid of the dark when I was a kid. The dark meant the monsters came out to play. Darkness meant you were no longer safe from the evil that came from it. I hated the dark. As I got older, I learned that monsters weren’t real and I had a mom, dad and brother who would keep me safe from the evil in the darkness.

Bright
.

I love the light of day, no evil, no monsters, or so I thought. Daylight brings stunning smiles and kind words that turn cruel and evil in the dark. Daylight brings a false sense of security that vanishes once the sun goes down.

Constant
.

Is the feeling of being watched but never knowing for sure.

Constant
.

Is the fear that you have been found again.

Constant
.

Is the knowing the truth, that you will never be safe again.

Brown
.

The color of warmth and security that I ache for with every part of my soul, but know that I will never have it. I don’t have the right to ask for it.

Black
.

The color of his soul. The color of his evil eyes.

Black
.

The color of Darkness. I hate the Dark.

Black
.

The color of my fear.

Black
.

I hate the color
Black
.

“Thanks, Beamer, but you know you didn’t have to follow me home just to carry him inside.”

“I know.” His voice holding that tone I love and hate. If a sound could be a smile, that tone would be it. It’s both sexy and annoying. That tone conveys so much, like the fact that he is going to do what he wants regardless of what I say, especially if he is being helpful or protective. I get it, like my brother and Slyde, he’s an alpha and all man. He would do whatever it took to protect his family and his friends. Like I said—sexy. Thing with Beamer is that he knows he’s sexy, again like I said, annoying. But, unlike my brother who is perpetual man whore, and knows he can get any girl he wants. Beamer is more reserved about it. He watches, studies and stalks his prey, once he decides on a girl then he attacks. However, he does put in the effort to have a relationship with a woman. I’ve seen it, but after a few months the women get frustrated with the job, and the fact that Beamer is more reserved. He doesn’t just open up, and I know this because I’m one of the few he has talked to, but even I know he hasn’t told me everything. I watch him as he bends down and lays Ethan in bed. His clothes fit perfectly to show off every single muscle he has, his strong legs and shoulders, his broad chest, his very, very, nice ass. He’s so gentle with Ethan, it’s really amazing how we have all come to love this little guy, and I love watching the tough men interact with him. It’s enough to melt any woman’s heart. I can tell by watching Beamer that he would make an amazing father one day.

“Do you think he’s Slydes?”

“Yep. I have no doubt, neither does he. I just hate that Hart does.”

“Yea, me too.” I sigh and walk out of the room. Beamer closes the door quietly and follow behind me. “I really hope she gets her happiness. After all that she has been through, I just pray that once all this is over that they find it. They both deserve it, and after spending all that time looking for her, I know Slyde won’t let her go again.”

“Nope, never.”

“She’s lucky in that sense. To have that, Slyde, I mean. I want that.” I finish quietly. I can hear my own voice and it’s sounding pathetic. I don’t have time for a pity party. Shaking my head, my eyes fall to Beamers face, he’s watching me closely. The look on his face makes my heart race. It’s soft, yet intense. His eyes, his rich chocolate brown eyes, hold me captive as he studies me. I’m finding it difficult to breathe and impossible to move. There is a peace I find in his eyes, a warmth and a safety that I long to have in my life. Snapping my brain away from thinking like that, I break our gaze. “Do you, um, would you like something to drink?” I ask, turning back toward the kitchen. I know I need something to calm my nerves after that moment.
Holy Shit.
Not waiting for his answer I grab the whiskey from my cabinet and two glasses. I barely pour one glass when I feel the heat of his body against my back. His arm wraps around me, his hand removing the bottle from my grasp and setting it on the counter. The chills racing up and down my spine, cause my body to shake softly. Taking a deep breath to calm myself, I inhale his scent—sweet, spicy and all man—which does nothing to calm my racing heart. Slowly I’m turned around, my chin caught in his hand raising my eyes to his. His hand disappears and my skin is left burning. Both his hands fall to my hips, he squeezes and lifts me to sit on the counter. They run up my sides, then back down my legs. he pulls them apart slowly and steps between them, never once breaking our gaze. His hand caresses the side of my face, his fingers sweeping into my hair, his lips lower to the side of my neck just below my ears, they press against my skin and I gasp. Soft, warm, yet firm lips move along my jaw before they capture my lips. He kisses me softly, gently, slowly nipping at my bottom lip. His tongue licks the seam of my lips, finally enticing mine to part. He slips his tongue past my lips and leisurely explores my mouth. His arm, wraps around my back, while his other hand stays in my hair. My body melts into his, my legs wrap around his waist, my arms around his neck, just holding on to him, to this moment, as it’s the only thing I can do. He kisses me deeper, harder, but still slowly as if he has all the time in the world to explore my mouth. I fucking pray that he does. He entices my tongue to dance with his and I melt further into him. It’s a good thing I’m not standing otherwise I’d be a melted pile of…hell I don’t even know or care. The way his body responds to mine has me wanting more, so much more from him. Suddenly his lips tear from mine. Opening my eyes, I find his watching me. His are filled with so many emotions that it’s hard for me to see them all clearly. He leans forward pressing his lips to my forehead and inhaling deeply. I do the same, trying to calm my breathing. I have never been kissed like that before, not one time has anyone been able to make me feel this way.

“I should go.” He rasps out, still not releasing me from his hold.

“You don’t have to.” I murmur softly.

“Yeah, sweetheart, I do.” He pulls away completely and I’m left feeling empty. He lifts me off the counter, holding me until he’s satisfied I can stand on my own.

“Call me if you have any problems with the little man tonight.”

All I can do is nod at him and watch as he walks to the front door.

“Lock me out.” He states and I follow him to the door, he pauses in the open doorway, turns back to look at me, “Oh and, Love, you will find that happiness too, if for no other reason than you deserve it.” I catch his small soft smile as he turns away and walks to his car. I stare after him, he opens his car door and turns to look at my front door before he gets in. He freezes, and stares back at me. After a few seconds I realize he’s waiting for me to close the door before he leaves. With a smile, I think, I close the door and lock it. I turn the lights off on my way to bed trying to figure out what the hell just happened. He kissed me, and it felt just like I imagined it would. No it didn’t it was better, better than anything I have ever felt before. He kissed me. His kiss has me wanting so much more, more than I have the right to ask for, but more none the less. I don’t know exactly what happened here tonight but I do know one thing, I am going to dream about his lips against mine, I’m going to dream about his warm solid body and his intoxicating scent. I’m going to dream about those lips, and the way they tasted. I’m going to dream about that kiss.

I kissed her. What the fuck was I thinking? Collapsing onto my bed, I stare at the ceiling and try to clear my head but the only thing I can think about is Leia. The sadness in her eyes, in her voice made me feel desperate to make it go away. That look in her eyes never should have been there, should never be there again. I want to erase any pain she’s in; I want to protect her from anything bad she has to go through. I know that she is most likely sad about her breakup with that douche-fuck, but she seriously deserves so much better than him. She deserves so much better than me, but I hate to see her so sad and I just wanted to give her a small bit of happiness. Something to take her mind off the sadness. So I kissed her, and fuck it took all the strength I had to leave it at just a kiss. I knew she wanted more, I did too, but like I said, she deserves better; she would realize that fact after it happened. We would never be able to fix our relationship. She’s family, and so much more, I love her, care way too much for her to ever put her in that situation. Fuck, I’d do just about anything to put that gorgeous smile back on her face. Fuck, her smile is stunning and takes my breath away. I can still feel her warm curvy body pressed against me and her long sexy legs wrapped around my waist. Her lips--fuck, those lips. Soft and juicy. Sucking on them, nipping at them, pressing mine against them… Those perfect lips could sustain my life, I have no doubt. The soft little whimpers and moans that escaped her throat had my cock aching. Fuck, just thinking about them, about the way her body melted into mine has my dick hard and throbbing. Fuck, I need a shower, but even I know that won’t do me any good. I crave her, always have and now that I’ve had a taste, I’m addicted.

Here’s my theory. Philosophy? Life motto? Whatever you want to call it.

Everyone everywhere has had or will have something happen to them. Something tragic. Something that causes absolute devastation and wrecks their world. My tragic might be a walk in the park compared to your tragic. But it’s mine. I wear the scars. I embrace the pain.

Everyone everywhere has had or will have something happen to them. Something great. Something that causes immense joy. Something to balance out the tragic. Something to heal or something to hang onto in the worst of times. My joy might seem silly to you. But it’s mine. I’ve earned it. It fills my heart.

You don’t get to choose your tragic. Because let’s be honest…who would ever
choose
that?

But you do get to choose your great.

I also don’t think that your great is always really obvious. Sometimes it is, but sometimes you have to look for it. Fight for it. Go to war for it.