Punished Into Submission (30 page)

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Authors: Holly Carter

BOOK: Punished Into Submission
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I watch as Angel bends down to pick up the glass without any fuss. She grabs the dustpan from under the counter, her eyes down the whole time. David’s hands shake as he picks up his bottle of Gin and drinks it straight from the bottle.

“How about that drink?”

When he speaks, Angel looks up and drops the brush. In five steps she is in front of me pointing her finger in the man’s face. His arms go up in defence but his obnoxious laugh fills the room and sends shivers down my spine.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Angel yells.

“Calm down, firecracker. I’ve come to have a drink in the best bar in town. But I have to say, the staff ain’t that friendly.” When he mentions staff he points to me standing stock-still.

“You leave my staff alone, Simon,” she yells.

The fuss makes the office door open and Hunter and Arrow look over in shock. Both men start walking towards the bar and Simon slides off his seat without turning around, like he knows what’s going to happen next.

“Can’t a man have a drink with his brother?” Simon asks, pointing in the direction of the approaching men. “And his father of course.” He points to David and I nearly faint. My legs get weak and my heart clenches tightly in my chest. I lean against the bar and bring my hand up, trying to calm the pain.

Simon’s eyes are on me when I look up. They narrow and darken before he turns in time to Hunter and Arrow.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Hunter yells, his fits balling by his sides.

“I’ve come to talk money.” Simon says, patting him on the shoulder.

“You have no business here, Simon and you know it.” Arrow says, stepping in between Hunter and Simon.

“I have just as much right to this place as you boys do, right Dad?” Simon looks over to David when he speaks.

I can’t believe I didn’t pick up on it before. David is Hunter and Arrow’s dad. I should have guessed. They all have the same smile and too similar eyes. David takes a large drink from his bottle and stands before making his way to the men. He sways a little but recovers, as he gets closer.

“It’s nice to see you, Simon.” David puts out his hand.

Simon looks to his father’s out reached hand then to Hunter and Arrow. He screws up his face and starts to walk away leaving David’s out reached hand untouched.

“I came to talk money, not have a family reunion.” Simon says, walking towards Hunter’s office. “Would you like to do this in private or shall we involve everyone?”

When Simon says “everyone,” his eyes dart to me quickly before looking back to the men standing in front of the bar. I jump when Angel’s hand touches my shoulder.

“Are you okay, Kat?” she asks, placing the back of her hand on my forehead.

“I’m, I’m...fine.” I swallow hard when I speak.

“You don’t look so well.”

“I don’t feel well, I might go upstairs if you’re going to be okay?” I fake a smile when I speak.

“Sure, honey. You go rest and hopefully you feel better by tonight.”

I nod and smile, unsure what to do next.

I round the bar and notice all eyes on me. I don’t know what they see in my face but Hunter frowns and steps towards me. I try to dodge his hand but he captures me and brings me close.

“Are you sick?” he says, doing the same thing Angel did two minutes earlier.

“I don’t know, I feel...” I struggle against the lump that’s formed.

Hunter turns towards the men and points to his office.

“I will be in soon; I’m just taking Kat up to bed.”

Hunter puts his arm around my shoulder and starts walking us out of the bar.

“Isn’t that sweet, my brother and his bitch.” Simon chuckles as he speaks.

His words cut me like a knife and I feel the bile rises in my throat. I hear Hunter start yelling but my legs are moving faster than my mind. I take the stairs two at a time and run towards my room. I make it to the bathroom just as the bile reaches the surface and I vomit into the toilet. My stomach aches as I continue to heave but nothing else comes up.

After five minutes I stand and wash my face. When I look in the mirror I’m pale. I touch my face and it’s cold. I don’t want to be alone in a room I can’t hide in. I run out of my room and into Hunter’s, locking the door and backing away from it. The fear of someone following me is strong. I fall onto his bed and crawl-up it backwards still watching the handle. It doesn’t move.

I settle under the thick sheet and pull it right up to my chin, taking calming, deep breaths. I close my eyes tight and count to ten before opening them again. I can’t hear anything but my own noises and the nerves finally start to settle. My body is tense as my mind relaxes one willing the other to do the same. I pray that when I wake, it’s all a bad dream and everything will okay.

“Never enough.” He whispers.

The tattoo gun is like a constant buzzing in my ear.

“Almost done.” The biker says, wiping at my skin.

I flinch when he does because it stings.

“Does it look okay?” I turn and ask him as he watches the ink sink into my skin.

“It’s perfect, just like you.” He winks at me and I melt a little.

I love this side of him. He’s so gentle and caring. He’s a passionate lover and man when he’s clean and not high. It’s only been two weeks, but I have high hopes for him. For us. The biker rubs the blood off my skin again before he drags the needle into my flesh a few more times. I grip the chair with my hands and dig my nails in.

“All done.” He says, clapping his hands and cheering.

This makes me laugh but I stop, when the last wipe on my skin leaves a stinging and burning on my skin.

“Can I see it?” I ask, sitting up and looking in the mirror.

“Numquam Satis.” I whisper, tracing the fresh ink with finger.

“Never enough.” He says, smiling as his eyes twinkle pride.

“Never enough.” I repeat, falling in love with danger.

I bolt upright in bed and rub my thigh. The burning feeling returns and I need the pain to stop. I jump out of bed and run to the door, unlocking it before pulling it open hard. The door hits the wall and I hear the crack but keep running. I run down the stairs two at a time in search of Hunter. I run into his office and find it empty, four chairs sit around the desk but no one is there. The mark burns again and my chest tightens.

“Are you feeling better, Kat?”

I turn to see Angel walking towards me. I look around the bar and see David’s seat empty as well.

“Where are the boys?” it comes out as a rugged breath.

“Hunter and David have gone out for a bit, and Arrow is in the gym,” she says, putting her arm on my shoulder.

I turn my body away, making her hand fall to her side.

“Kat, are you okay sweetie?” Angel looks worried, concerned...

“I need Hunter.” It’s a broken whisper but it’s there.

“He’s gone out, Arrow is here.” She points towards the gym.

“Where is Simon?” I dare not ask, but it happens.

I close my eyes as I wait for the answer

“He left when Hunter and David did.”

I open my eyes and let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding. I head towards the gym in a fast pace walk. Through the glass I see Arrow, covered in sweat slogging it out with the punching bag. His hair is damp and his clothes are drenched. He’s obviously been at it for a while. I barge through the door, causing the same reaction that happens to Hunter’s door. It hits the wall and I hear it break the plaster.

“Arrow.”

He hits the bag, left, right, left, before he turns. His chest is heaving and he’s breathless.

“Kat?” he pulls of his gloves and steps towards me.

“I need you to hurt me, and I need you to do it now.” It comes out as desperate as it sounds.

“What?” Arrow throws his gloves on the ground and wipes his face with the towel around his neck.

“Hurt me. I need it now.”

“I can’t, I’m too fucking mad to touch anyone.” Arrows rubs his face hard before dropping the towel.

“Arrow, please.” I scream, sucking back the tears.

He stares at me for long minutes before he walks over to me and grabs my shoulders. He opens his mouth to say something but stops.

“Make it stop; I need you to make it stop.” I sob, unable to control it.

“Okay.”

I look up and Arrow nods his head. He grabs my hand and drags me out of the gym and towards the stairs. He stops when we reach the door that goes down to the basement. He opens the door and I run down the stairs two at a time as I head for the room Arrow caught Martin and me in. I pull the door open and walk inside. I walk straight to the whips on the wall and pull the bullwhip off the hook. I hear the door creek and turn throwing the whip to Arrow.

I walk over to the stonewall, and turn around so I can’t see his face. I lift my shirt over my head so I’m standing in my only a bra on the top half of my body. I drop it on the floor next to my feet before I place my hands on either side of my face on the wall and wait. I hear the crack before I feel it hit my body. The sharp stinging pain radiates from shoulder to shoulder.

He hits me again, and the pain turns to a burn; I feel my skin welt instantly.

The third is just as hard, but the pain is further down. My knees try to buckle but I pull myself back up to standing.

The fourth feels like a knife, cutting through my skin.

The fifth is sharp and intense.

The sixth begins to numb the other pain I feel.

The seventh sends me into an island.

The island is surrounded by crystal clear water. The sand is magical and white. It feels relaxing when I dig my toes into it and the sand falls through the gaps. I hear children giggling and when I look up, I see a family building a sandcastle together in the sand. I smile and wave when the children wave to me. I look out towards the ocean and see a man coming towards me. Like before, his body is wet and his board shorts hang low on his hips. His body is mesmerizing. He runs towards me like before, but I don’t move this time, I want to see his face.

As he approaches, I see his lips move. I can vaguely hear muffled noises when they do. The closer he gets his face starts to disappear and I stand instantly wanting to catch him.

“Kat.”

My legs feel like jelly, but I will them to support me.

“Fuck me, Kat.” I hear my name.

“What the fuck did you do?”

It’s Hunter.

I open my eyes and green pools look back at me. I’m on my side on the ground and for a moment I have no idea where I am or what happened. I see two other people and narrow my eyes to see them better. Reyner stands beside Arrow who holds a whip. I go to move and flinch, the moment I do, the feeling of razors digging into my flesh feels real.

“Let me help you up.” Hunter threads his arm through mine as he pulls me to my feet.

“I’m fine.” I say, shrugging Hunter off but feeling the bolting pain. “I just need a shower.”

I start towards the door but stop when I stand next to Arrow. His head is down and he shakes his head, disappointment written all over his face.

“Thank you.” I whisper, only loud enough for him to hear before walking out.

When I walk up the stairs I hear Reyner screaming at him, and instantly guilt tries to swallow me. I ignore the newfound pain and go straight to my room, needing a hot shower to ease the sting. As soon as I’m through my door, I start to take off my pants and bra. It’s a slow process but it’s doable.

I stand under the water for what seems like hours. The water runs cold but I just continued to stand under the flow and think about how I was going to fix the problem I had caused. After a few more minutes, I decided I need to go down and apologise to Reyner and Arrow before my actions cause more problems. While it helped me, his actions could destroy them.

I dry as best I can, before putting on a flowing sundress. I abandon the underwear as it’s too hard to put on and quite frankly, I don’t give a fuck right now. I walk out of the bathroom and see Hunter sitting on the bed with his head in his hands.

“Why did you do it?” he asks, his voice is broken.

“I needed it.” it’s the truth and when I say it, I feel dirty.

“No you didn’t.” he lifts his head, turns and looks at me.

“I did, you don’t understand.”

“Well tell me, Kat. Fucking tell me why you did that? Why you let him do that to you?” Hunter stands. His jaw tightens as his hands clench into tight fists.

“I needed to feel numb to stop me from feeling something I didn’t want to.” I shout.

“Feeling is something you experience in here." he presses his hand to my chest. “It doesn’t matter how it feels on the outside, it’s how it feels inside that makes us break. I didn’t want him to break you like that; I wanted to be the one who finally consumed you."

“You don’t understand, I wanted you, Hunter. I wanted you and you weren’t here.”

“You wanted me, so you go to Arrow? Is that how it works?” he spits, his hand shoots out and he smashes the vase of roses.

I feel cornered. I feel fucking violated and I’m in self-destruct mode. Hunter is in the exact same mood. His chest rises and falls furiously. Mine is just as bad. My hands ball into fists and I fight the urge to swing a left hook right into his cheek. A quick look at Hunter’s hands and they are in the same position and while I know he would never hit me, I fucking wish he would. I’m the first to snap of course.

“I fucking hate you; I hate you so fucking much.” I yell, or scream rather.

“Bullshit, you’re just angry because I pulled down your walls you built and you have feelings. Kat, you having fucking feelings and you hate that you can finally feel them again.”

“Do you know why I practically begged you to fuck me? I did it because I crave the emotional pain more than I do the physical; I wanted to feel it, if not for a moment when I was with you. It hurts so fucking much but I like it. I like the pain I get when I make myself feel. It’s you, Hunter, it’s fucking you that I hate. You make me feel things I don’t want to feel.” Unable to stop my rage, I smash the photo frames on the bedside table. One second it was a pretty crystal, the next it was tiny fragments on the floor.

“Hunter, you fucking consume me.” I yell. “You bring me on my fucking knees not because I fucking like it, but because I fucking want it. You have no idea how hard this is for me. I have ten days left and I’m fucking done giving into your little games. I will leave here the same fucking way I came, with dignity and fucking respect.”

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