Pushing the Envelope: A Prequel from "The Barter System" World (4 page)

December 2006

Tawny walked into the O’Connell house a few feet behind Riya.  The windows were shuttered and all the lights were off. 

They could hear Maggie’s voice down the hall, speaking soothingly.  Following the sound, they found her in the master bathroom with Archer. 

She held a cold washcloth to his head as he vomited violently into the toilet.  Both of them knelt on the floor.

The strong smell of hard liquor was undeniable. 

Glancing up, Maggie tried to smile and ended up shaking her head.  She looked more exhausted than Tawny had ever seen her. 

“Give me a few minutes, girls.” 

Backing from the room, Riya stared through the doorway at the broken man her father had become since Dalia’s death. 

“I don’t know how to help him.” 

Saying nothing, Tawny led the way to the kitchen. 

She started pulling cold cuts from the fridge.  She wanted to lighten the mood, talk about anything but the slow downward spiral of a man both of them loved. 

“Riya, are you going to tell me what happened with the rocket scientist?”

A strange shiver worked its way through her.  “We will
not
speak of him.”

Pausing with the knife in her hand, she asked, “I need to cut a bitch or what?”

“Nothing like that…he was so strange about sex, Tawny.”  The frown between her eyes smoothed.  “I think he has a thing for his sister or something.”

One blink.  “You’re right.  Let’s not speak of him.  No need for me to puke up my guts before dinner.”  She sliced tomatoes and onions.  She felt Riya’s presence more than heard her approach.

“Tawny…?”

“Yes?”

“Why won’t you talk to me about what’s going on?” 

Turning her head, she looked at Riya. 

“I know something isn’t right.  It hasn’t been right for a long time.”  She shrugged her shoulder.  “You do so much for me…I’m your best friend.  I want to help you if you need me.”

“What do you think is going on?” she asked carefully.

For a long moment, they stared at each other without speaking.  She watched as Riya inhaled deeply. 

“I think you went through something…something bad.”  Her voice broke. 

“Why would you think that?”

“You’re different, more intense.  I won’t pry because I know you like to keep things private.  I just…I know you feel like losing Mom takes priority and there’s no doubt it broke my heart but you matter to me.  You’re
here
, Tawny.  I love you.” 

Putting down the knife and wiping her hands, she held Riya’s shoulders.  “Something happened.  It was bad.  It was less than two years after Dalia died.  You were under so much stress.  I got through it, I’m okay.” 

Tears tracked down her best friend’s cheeks.  “You can’t do that.  You can’t choose to only share the
good
things.  I have a right to be there for you, through the good and the bad, just like you are for me.”

“I didn’t want you to worry and I didn’t want Mom to lose her shit.  The last three years have been rough on all of us.”  She shook her friend gently.  “If I hadn’t been
sure
I could get through it, I would have talked to you.”

“What do you really do for a living?”

Schooling her features, she asked, “What do you mean?”

Riya rolling her eyes remained one of the funniest things ever.  “Give me a break.  Web design?”

“I am
awesome
at web design, bitch.”

“Agreed.  However, I’m pretty sure you’re not getting fucked up on the regular from setting up your latest health food website.” 

She started to deny it but Riya wasn’t having it.  “You do
not
get bruises from your keyboard and pretending I’m dumb will get your ass kicked.”

Sighing heavily, she said, “I do Civil War reenactments.”

“Liar.”

“No seriously, you should see me with a bayonet.  I’m one of the best they have.”

“Tawny. 
Tell me.
”

“I’m a hacker.”

“That rings of truth.  What else?”

“Sometimes, I have hands-on assignments.”

“Are you in danger?”

“Only if I suck at my job.”

The silence drew out between them and Riya never broke eye contact.  “Are you doing something good?”  Tawny nodded slowly.  “Will you tell me if you need help?” 

“I will.” 

“Anything happens to you and I’ll die.  I have a feeling I could have already lost you once already.  That’s terrifying.  Do you understand?  I won’t survive losing you.  You’re my other half.” 

Hugging her tightly, Riya added, “Do your thing, make the world a better place, but always pick up the phone when I call so I know you’re okay.”

She hugged her back hard enough to bruise.  “Thanks.”

“Is there a man involved?”

“Yes, but it isn’t what you think.”

Pulling back far enough to look at her, she asked, “No sex?  You’re friends with a guy and no sex?”

“Oh no.  Duh.  There’s definitely sex.  Like, a lot of it.  It just isn’t emotional for either of us.”

“You sure know how to keep your mouth shut.”

“You blab enough for three people so…yeah.”

At that moment, Maggie entered the room.  She’d changed clothes.  When she was settled on the barstool, she said quietly, “We have to get him into rehab.  If we don’t, he’s going to die and I don’t know how to stop that from happening.” 

“What do I need to do?” Riya asked softly.

“Prepare yourself for battle because that’s what it’s going to take to make him go.  I can’t run the business alone.  I need him to dry out, to function enough to help me.  I was already taking care of Edward’s responsibilities.  Taking on Archer’s is getting to be too much.” 

“We’re home for six weeks before our last semester starts.  Let’s find a program.”

Tawny shook her head.  “You’ve got enough on your plate, Riya.  No way are you getting sidelined by this shit.” 

Focusing on Maggie, she said clearly, “Mom, you’ve done enough on all counts.  Hold down the fort at the company a little longer.  I’ll handle Archer.”

She wiped her hands on the dish towel and her mom asked nervously, “Honey…what do you have in mind?”

The two women she loved more than anything had eyes as big as saucers.  Apparently, she was a
wild card
.

Giving them a huge grin and pushing Riya onto a stool beside Maggie, she replied, “I’ve got this.  No matter what you hear, don’t get up.” 

With a wink, she walked down the hall to Archer’s bedroom and opened his door without knocking. 

He was in the process of pouring himself a drink. 

Slamming the heavy door with a bang startled him enough to spill the expensive whiskey and took him off guard.  It gave her the advantage in the war he didn’t know they were about to wage. 

Stepping closer, she took the bottle from him and put it back on the tray that held several more bottles.  Balancing it in one hand, she walked to the French doors, opened them, and threw the entire fucking liquor collection on the patio that extended along the back of the house as hard as she could. 

The sound of shattering glass was
spectacular
. 

She turned around to face him.  He was staring at the liquor seeping into the Mexican tile.  A slow frown formed between his eyes and he lifted his gaze to hers. 

She watched anger replace the disbelief, his face reddened, and as his lips parted to scream in fury, she slapped him across the face as hard as she could. 

He held his hand to his cheek in shock.

“That was from Dalia.  She told me to tell you to stop being a selfish dick and remember that you have people who love you, that are still fucking
here
, who would appreciate you not drinking yourself into oblivion immediately after they clean up your goddamn vomit.”

The man was beyond stunned.  While he processed her words, she walked around him and proceeded to search his bedroom, bathroom, and closet for alcohol. 

No one conducted a more thorough search than Tawny.  Nothing was off limits.  When she’d found several small bottles, she added them to the shattered pile on the patio, destroying them one by one. 

Nudging him into a chair, she gentled her voice.  “I’m not going to guilt you about Dalia because we all loved her and we all lost her.”

“
Dalia…
”

“However, I
will
tell you that this can’t continue,” she interrupted.  “You’re driving my mother toward a fucking nervous breakdown.  Your daughter worries day and night about you and blames
herself
for the downward spiral of her family.”

She put her hands on her hips.  “As for me, you’re the closest thing I’ve had to a dad since I was six years old and I’d consider it a personal favor if you’d seek help, get your shit together, and not try to drink yourself to death.  Your family, your business, and your life are circling the bowl, Archer.” 

In his closet, she yanked a heavy duffle bag from the top shelf and packed him enough clothes for a couple of weeks.  She dragged it to the bedroom door. 

Back in front of him, she asked carefully, “Will you be the man I love and respect and take the help being offered to you?” 

He rubbed his hands over his face and stared at her for a long time.  Finally, he nodded tiredly. 

“Excellent.  Let’s get to work.”

He followed her to the kitchen and the other two women could barely contain their panic.  Even Marta looked ready to run away. 

“Archer is going to rehab.  I know a good one.  They’ll get him in and it isn’t all preachy and shit.  Hug him goodbye and he’ll see you in a couple weeks when they allow visitors.” 



Driving back from the Palm Beach clinic just after dark, she made a phone call to New York. 

He picked up on the first ring.  “Hello, lover.”

“Don’t call me that, Hollow.  You know it’s creepy.” 

His laughter filled the line.  “Agreed.  When are you coming up?”  She could hear him typing rapidly. 

“Two days.  Thank you for finding the place for Archer.  It was as perfect as you said it would be.” 

“I’m curious.  Why did you wait so long to take him?”

“Riya and my mom, they’re gentle souls.  The situation had to get to a certain point for them, where I knew they wouldn’t be part of the problem.  I don’t have the best bedside manner…”

“Stop it!  You?”

“I’ll ignore that.  Before today, they’d have had a serious issue with my…methods.” 

“Diabolical bitch.”

“Damn right.  Anything interesting on the horizon?” 

“Many things that we will discuss after you’re naked, sweaty, and satiated in my bed.”

“I do adore a man with a plan.  I’ll see you day after tomorrow.  Keep an eye on Archer’s progress, will you?”

“Already on it.  See you soon, Red.”

Pulling into the driveway, Tawny turned off the engine and sat in the dark for several minutes in meditation.  It was necessary to maintain her presence in two very different worlds as two very different women. 

Reaching beneath the seat, she withdrew a loaded gun, clicked the safety in place, and put it in the bottom of her bag.  Then she got out, locked the car, and walked toward the brightly lit entrance of Riya’s home. 

She was thinking one word:
brownies
.

November 2008

“Bitch, how much education do you
need
?” 

“It makes sense to keep going for my PhD.  A master’s isn’t enough for my field.”

For almost a minute, she stared at Riya and wondered how many years of her life she planned to give to the conundrum of how her father dealt with his grief.

As if Tawny had mentally coordinated it, Archer’s latest beach bunny wandered into the kitchen, grabbed a bottle of water, and gave them a vacant smile. 

“Y’all wanna go swimmin’?  It’s so
pretty
here.  I just love the water at night.  Don’t y’all love the water?”

Riya blinked.  “Um, not right now.  Maybe tomorrow.”

“Okay, honey!  You’re just the cutest little thing
ever
!”

What made the statement outrageous was the fact that she was less than two years older than Archer’s daughter.

Tawny took a moment to center, to calm the little voice inside her that wanted to give the poor dumb thing a life lesson or a swift kick in the ass.

When…Sue?  Sam?  Stacy?  Whatever.  When she was gone, Riya rubbed her temples hard. 

“This one is quite a piece of work.  Not sure I can effectively communicate.”

“Keep glitter in your pocket.  You get stuck, throw some.  She’ll be so fascinated, she won’t remember what she asked you anyway.”

A runaway chuckle broke before she could rein it in.  “That’s horrible.  True but horrible.”  She went back to rolling strips of filo dough and dark chocolate that she’d bake the next morning. 

Tawny was irritated and dropped onto a stool.

Riya should be fucking writing her
books
…not trying to decode the male psyche or deal with talking blowup dolls.  Talk about a waste of time.  Most men needed food and sex.  What was so mysterious?

When she’d accidentally stumbled on Riya’s pen name during a random security upgrade of their systems, she didn’t say a word. 

Her best friend was far different online than she allowed herself to be in the real world.  The erotic novels she published anonymously, the blog under yet another name, and the topics she covered in both fascinated a woman who had known her all her life. 

In the virtual world, Riya was one dirty, dirty bitch.

Tawny didn’t want to ruin that freedom for her.  God knew she never had any fun.  It seemed the cat was about to claw its way out of the bag.

“I have an idea for my dissertation.” 

“This shit better not put me to sleep.  I can’t believe you’re committing to another four years for a piece of fucking paper.” 

Taking a deep breath, Riya said, “I don’t think it will put you to sleep.”

Then the brunette whose brain operated in two different arenas just like Tawny’s outlined her idea for a project that would translate to a non-fiction and several fiction books. 

“You write fiction?”  Blushing brightly, Riya nodded.  It made Tawny smile.  “What are they, like…dramas?”

“Uh, no.  Not exactly.  I mean, there’s drama in them but that isn’t the genre they’d be classed in exactly.”

Fucking with Riya was her favorite pastime.
  “You mean they’re like spy novels or something?”

There was a long silence and then Riya tilted her head and narrowed her eyes.  “You fucking already know.”

“What I know is that my best friend is a total slut who’s on the road to hell in a hand basket.” 

Then she busted up laughing.

“Oh my god, how the fuck do you keep so many secrets?”  Hands on her hips, she demanded, “How long have you known?”

“More than a year.  Tramp.”

With a big sigh, Riya sat on the stool beside her.  “I wish I could be more like you.”

“That’s a ridiculous statement.”

Shaking her head, she said, “No.  I mean it.  Your life interests me.” 

“My life would make a good book.  It’s shit for the emotional balance of a person.”

“How’s your man friend?”

One shoulder lifted in a shrug.  “Still as damaged as I am.  Still hot and hung.  He’s a non-starter but I love the human being he is and how he walks through the world.”

“You aren’t in love with him after all this time?”

“Riya, Riya, Riya…not everyone gives a flying fuck about Prince Charming.  No, I’m not in love with him.  I like him.  I respect him.  I come buckets when I fuck him.”  She smiled carefully.  “I don’t think I’m capable of love.”

“That’s bullshit.  You’re more capable than most, I think.  You’re the crazy love type.  Once it hits you, you’ll kill to preserve it.”

“Ha!  Okay.  I’ll keep my eyes open should this miraculous event occur.  In the meantime, I’ll continue fucking my mystery man and call it good.”  She frowned.  “Speaking of fucking, how long has it been since you got laid?  Too long, I’m thinking.”

“I’m conducting an experiment.”

“Does it involve celibacy?”  She nodded. 

“You’ve only fucked two people and you’re in your early twenties.  Can’t you wait to do experiments that involve no sex when you’re old and wrinkled?”

Riya’s laughter was one of the best things in the world.

“I have an end-game in mind.  Right now, I’m in the initial stages.  Testing the waters and whatnot.”  Her eyes drifted shut.  “I’m going to buy that duplex on the beach I looked at last week.”

“I just closed on a condo a couple of miles away.” 

“Your secret-keeping ability is supernatural.”

“I’m done with school and I need privacy.  I don’t like scaring Maggie and I work weird hours.  The other businesses run themselves but my side work is pretty time-consuming.”  Considering, she asked, “The celibacy thing…is that about your dissertation?” 

“I need certain data.  This is a four-year span that has a lot of moving pieces.  There are some parts that aren’t solid in my mind yet.  It’s all going to be surveys and stuff so I need a real world test as well.  I’m using myself as the control subject.”  Then she added, “I need privacy to do everything without Dad looking over my shoulder.”

They talked for hours and Tawny wondered if Riya knew the scope of her idea as well as she thought. 

She figured it would keep her mind interested, give her more writing material for the dirty books she liked to write, and maybe she’d accidentally meet someone. Stranger things had happened.  No one deserved romantic love more than her closest friend.

Riya yawned.  “I’m crashing.  We can talk tomorrow.  I want to go running in the morning before the rain.” 

Leaning in her direction, Tawny gave her a smacking kiss on the cheek.  “Get your beauty sleep.  I, on the other hand, am naturally stunning and require little rest.”

“Working again?”

“Always.  I love it.  Go to bed.  Enjoy your
run
.”  She said the word as if referring to maggots, the grossest thing on the planet, in her opinion.  “Wake me up with that morning chipper shit and you get sliced.”

“I’ll bake early.  Food always wakes you up.”  A few seconds later, Riya disappeared down the hall.



Hollow kept her busy. 

He scoured the web for kidnappings, missing persons, unsolved murders, rapes, and domestic cases that meant an adult or child was in danger.

It seemed there was no end to the scumbags that populated the earth, breathing the same air as the rest of civilization.

They built their own investigations. 

Some of the work was the stuff of nightmares.  It didn’t make her love what she did, or the difference she made, any less.

Their team operated outside the law. 

The boundaries that prevented the police from making arrests and the district attorneys from getting convictions didn’t impede Hollow’s enterprise. 

She’d been working for him more than a year when he brought up her own night of violence.  He gave her the files on the men who’d killed Arnie and raped her. 

As she suspected, it hadn’t been their first taste of crime.  The only reason she hadn’t been killed as well was due to a nightclub across the street closing.  Within minutes, the street was flooded with milling patrons. 

She imagined that the men had been concerned with getting their clothes fastened and getting away from the scene.  Unconscious, she didn’t present much of a threat. 

Most of her day had been spent going through their arrest records and cross-referencing their victims. 

Finally, Hollow had rested his hands over hers, kissed her cheek, and whispered, “Enough.  Now you move on.  They took enough.”

He’d held her while she cried and then he’d kissed her until she was moaning in his arms. 

He took her to his bed.  For hours, he loved her body and soothed her spirit.  “Remember who you are, Tawny.  Remember who you are and then let it go.”

She had done as he told her and the slow-bleeding wound inside was finally able to scab over. 

Tawny owed Hollow for many things but, to her, the night he gave her back who she was symbolized the greatest of them.