Quest (Shifter Island Book 4) (3 page)

Luca had found himself unable to rest after he left the library. After gobbling down three slices of pizza from a place nearby, he’d slipped into a seldom-used parking garage, thinking he might find shelter there—as he’d done a few times during his Involvement—but the place was too damp, too dark.

From there he went to the park and sat on a bench, watching people walk past, some of them just wandering, some with an obvious destination in mind. That made him wish he had something in mind, some plan. Some magic spell that would locate Allison for him.

Maybe this whole journey was foolish. Aaron might be right; Allison might well be married now. She might be somewhere that he wouldn’t be able to find even if he spent the rest of his life searching.

No
, he told himself.

The gods had meant for them to be together. The gods would help him find her.

The park still had a working water fountain, so he spent a couple of minutes drinking his fill, trying to wash away the disappointment that had grown like a cluster of weeds inside his chest.

That was all it was, he told himself—just disappointment. Part of him had hoped that he would find her right away, that she’d be at the marina waiting for him, or that her name would be listed somewhere that was easy to find, and he was simply disappointed that that hadn’t happened.

As he stepped away from the fountain with water dripping from his chin, he thought of something his mother had told him many times.
Anything worth having is worth working for—and worth fighting to keep.

She was a wise female, his mother. Even now that he was grown, she still knew what to say to encourage and comfort him, to keep him going when he’d become confused and discouraged.

But when he’d told her that he needed to leave the island, she’d said nothing.

Maybe there was nothing to say.

He lifted a hand to wipe the water off his chin and almost stumbled as the wolf inside him surged against its walls. Normally, the animal would rest when Luca was tired. At this point in the afternoon, it should have been eager to sleep—but it wasn’t. It wanted its mate.

Wanted Luca to find her, claim her. It had waited long enough.

But how?

Among so many people? In a land as enormous as this?

On the island, it was never difficult to find another member of the pack. Yes, there were places to hide, but it was almost impossible to reach them without leaving a trail for the rest of the pack to follow. Luca and Aaron had tried many times as youngsters to find a hiding place that was truly a secret, that couldn’t be tracked down by their parents or their teachers or their playmates, but they’d never succeeded. They were young; they had always left clues.

Had Allison not left a single clue?

He walked around and around the park until people began to look at him with concern, and he supposed he had been muttering to himself. That wouldn’t do; it might prompt one of the humans to call the police.

He stopped long enough to pull a comb from his pack of supplies, then used his reflection in a window to comb his hair neatly and tidy his clothes. His Involvement had taught him how he should look and act to avoid attention, and he called on those lessons now. He needed to look like one of
them
. Someone who could fade into the crowd, at least until he decided what he should do next.

He was hungry again, so he found a quiet place at the base of a tree and ate some of the food his mother had packed for him, then returned to the fountain and drank a little more water.

The whole time, the wolf paced restlessly, whining from deep inside its chest.

Tonight he was sure the wolf would insist on coming out so that it could sit in the moonlight and howl, calling out to the rest of its kind how lost and in pain it was. Four years ago, it had tried its best to convince Luca to steal Allison away—to ignore what she said she wanted in favor of the bond they all felt growing between them.

Because it
was
a bond. It was their true nature telling them that they were meant to be together, no matter what they needed to give up.

But Luca had listened to Allison, not the wolf.

Now? The longer he stood here, the deeper and more agonizing the pain became. It was a fire deep inside his gut, threatening to burn him up and turn him to ash.

He was wasting time, the wolf told him.

He needed to
hunt
.

To track Allison down, the way he had once tracked down his brother.

Just as there had been no place on the island for Aaron to successfully hide from him, there was nowhere in this enormous land that he could fail to find his mate. How many other people there were didn’t matter, he told himself firmly. She was here somewhere—and he remembered her scent.

He would find her.

Yes,
the wolf told him.
Hunt. She isn’t far.

Are you sure?

Do you doubt me?

No. But…

She’s nearby. I sense her. It’s why I’ve brought you here now. She’s close. You can find her.

Still, he needed to steady himself. So much had happened over the past few weeks that he felt ill at ease, unsure, vulnerable. Micah had caught him completely unaware while he was roaming the woods thinking only of his displeasure with his brother, and then had nearly killed him. Then he’d had to watch his brother—his
younger
brother, by the gods—seal his bond with Abby. And he’d had to mend fences with Katrin, who said she had loved him since they were youngsters running through the woods.

He needed to set all that aside now, and listen to the call of the wolf.

Rather than stay in one place, he began to walk. He thought he might pick up a trail that way, if indeed Allison was somewhere nearby.

Years ago, she’d come frequently to the shops on this street, to the gardens on the east side of the park, to this bar, to that movie theater. He knew the routes she’d taken, which ways she preferred to walk because they were shorter, or safer.

He’d walked with her many times, and had always been disturbed by how frightened she became when something startled her after dark. No wolf was afraid of the dark, and he had longed to tell her he would always protect her—that nothing lurked in the dark that he could not defeat.

Except his own thoughts, he supposed.

Step by step, he followed the path she had most commonly taken, the one leading back to her home near the campus. From “downtown,” the place where all the shops were, it took only about twenty minutes to walk. He could have covered it in half that time, but he was tired and dismayed. He still was certain she no longer lived in that apartment, because it was meant only for students, but he thought seeing the house again might encourage him. Maybe, even after all this time, there was still a bit of her scent there, something he could follow.

There
.

Yes, that was the one: the white and blue house with the trees that flowered in the springtime. He was both exhilarated and heartbroken as he approached it, thinking of a younger Luca expecting to see her gazing out of that big window, welcoming him with a smile.

If only she could be there now, waiting for him, smiling—but there was no one in the window.

When he reached the house, he climbed the two low steps leading to the walkway and stood looking at the front door, remembering the patter of her footsteps coming down the inside stairs so she could fling open the door and throw herself into his arms.

He remembered the feel of her, the sudden warmth of her body against his, and how she had always demanded a kiss.

Inside him, the wolf cried out, almost in agony.

He wouldn’t be able to stay here if someone else lived here now. He wouldn’t be able to stand out here staring at the door, trying to will Allison to fling it open and run into his embrace. He would have to move on, and fairly soon.

But first, he would investigate a little.

Search for her.

He would have to…

His breath left him suddenly, as if it had been sucked out by a whirlwind, and the wolf became so frantic he thought it would explode out of his chest, a separate being once and for all. Or was that his heart that was suddenly so huge he thought he might die?

There
.

She was right there, perhaps a hundred steps away, looking at him.

Like a miracle come to life, she was right there.

He wanted to run to her, to seize her and sweep her around in a circle the way he had four years ago, their bodies hungry and demanding, the two of them sharing each other’s breath as they kissed, each other’s heartbeat. But he was so numb with shock that he couldn’t force himself to take even a single step, so he had to wait and watch as she came closer, praying that she was glad to see him and not displeased.

She didn’t seem displeased. Did she?

“Luca.”

She was only a few steps away now, at the edge of the property. Her mouth was open a little. She was surprised. Unsure what to think, how to react. But… pleased. Yes? She was, wasn’t she?

Gods who made our father the first wolf, let her be pleased.

“This is… I didn’t expect to see you here,” she said.

Slowly, carefully, he made his way back down the walkway to join her. He left a little bit of distance between them, a little more than arm’s reach. He would let her decide, he told the wolf. Even now, he would let her decide—even though he was sure it would kill him if she turned and walked away.

“I arrived this morning,” he murmured.

“Oh. Then you don’t live here any more, either? Did you go back to your island?”

Her tone was light. Very… what did the humans call it? Conversational. As if she were talking to an acquaintance, or a stranger. But he was no acquaintance. He knew how soft her skin was in her most private of places. Knew the full, heady scent of that place. Knew what her voice sounded like, whispering to him in the deep shadows of the night.

He couldn’t take his eyes off her.

“I wanted to see you again,” he said quietly. “I looked this morning, to see if I could find your address.”

“I moved out of state. A few months after graduation.” She waited, and when he didn’t respond, she went on. “I got a really good job offer. Like, the kind of offer you dream about. I didn’t really want to leave home, but I couldn’t turn it down. I mean, I thought about it, then I said, ‘If you don’t at least try this, you’re crazy.’ You know? You always wonder what would have happened.”

“Yes,” he said. “I do wonder that.”

“You look good, Luca.”

And Allison? She wasn’t quite the girl he had known. She seemed more… completed now, more fully an adult. She was wearing the same type of clothing she’d always preferred, jeans and a simple shirt, but her hair seemed to be a slightly richer, deeper red. Her fingernails weren’t ragged, as they’d sometimes been years ago. When she was nervous, she’d chewed them until her fingertips were raw—and he’d always licked them gently to soothe them, something she’d seemed to enjoy.

“Are you all right?” she asked. “You look a little stressed.”

“It’s been a… troublesome day.”

She looked around for a moment, then sat down on the top step and patted the concrete beside her. “Here, sit down. I’m sure whoever lives here won’t mind. If there’s even anybody living here right now.”

Then she smiled up at him, waiting for him to accept the invitation—and still acting as if they were nothing more than two people who occasionally crossed paths.

He heard his brother’s voice say,
She may not even want to see you.

But she did. She was here, asking him to sit beside her so they could talk. She hadn’t run away.

Not yet.

“Will you…” he started.

The wolf was struggling to break free, to howl its delight over having finally found its mate, and part of Luca was willing to let it do that. He would have howled himself, he thought, if he’d been on the island, surrounded by others who had known this same surge of pleasure. His brother, for instance, who was probably busy turning a plain, small cabin into a comfortable home for himself and his bride.

But here there was nothing but humans. He could see several of them from where he was standing: a man with a dog, a couple of young females carrying boxes out of a truck, a woman watering her garden with a hose. None of them would respond well to seeing a wolf break free in the middle of their neighborhood.

Nor would Allison.

Even now, Allison had no idea what he truly was.

For a moment, he wasn’t sure how to interpret the look on her face. There seemed to be layers to it, suggesting that she was feeling a dozen different things.

Slowly, he sat down beside her, still keeping that small distance between them, giving her room to escape if she thought she needed to.

“Will I what?” she asked.

His words seemed like solid, tangible things, clogging his throat like a handful of pebbles. He’d felt this same way four years ago, after she had told him she couldn’t go with him back to the island—that she cared for him very much, but she couldn’t walk away from her home, her family, her friends, her career…