Radiance (5 page)

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Authors: Shayne McClendon

Tags: #Gay & Lesbian, #Literature & Fiction, #Erotica, #Gay, #Romantic, #Romance, #Contemporary

BOOK: Radiance
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Chapter Four

 

Elijah stood at the window while Harper poured himself coffee.  He thought about the taste of Brie’s and smiled. 

“She’s a good person, Harper.” 

“I realize.  I’m not an ogre.”

Turning, Elijah placed his hands on the back of one of the dining chairs.  “The night of the building commemoration, I didn’t recognize her name.  She stayed in the background at the winery.  I only ever heard her referred to as Brie.”

“She looks nothing like she did when I glimpsed her several years ago.”  Harper shrugged.  “Isabella attended public events with her parents.  Gabriella did not.” 

“She was embarrassed.  Shy but…something else.”  Gripping the heavy wood, he added, “She’s
still
embarrassed.”  He didn’t look away from gray eyes that knew him well. 

“You talked to her.” 

“I couldn’t sleep.” 

Harper walked out of the kitchen and paused in front of him.  “You went to
see
her.”  Elijah didn’t respond.  “Tell me.”

“She fed me tamales and let me taste her coffee.”  A frown formed between his oldest friend’s eyes.  “I showed her my scars.”

“Why?”

“She told me she was self-conscious for different reasons than she used to be.  I assumed it was the accident.”  He shrugged.  “She could have
no
scars worse than mine.  I wanted to put her at ease.” 

Turning back to the window, he crossed his arms at his back.  “When I followed them from the party, I realized she hadn’t left the chair because she
couldn’t
on her own.  Unable to walk, she didn’t want her wheelchair or walker beside her.”

“Vanity perhaps.” 

“No.  She wanted to pretend for one night that she was better.  The exhaustion took her earlier than expected.”  He inhaled carefully.  “She begged Hudson to send her home and return to his celebration.  He refused as did Natalia.”  More to himself, he murmured, “She’s desperate to be well again.” 

“Elijah.”  He met silver eyes.  “Do you
love
her?” 

“I’ve never loved a woman.  I’m unsure.”  Facing the window again, he wondered.  “I meant to play for her but then she cried for me, hugged me, when she saw my scars.” 

“Gabriella
cried
for you?” 

He nodded.  “I hugged her back and held her until she went to sleep.  I made sure she was safely in her bed and locked the door before I returned here.” 

There was a long silence.  “You’d
play
for her?”  Elijah nodded again.  “You’ve
never
played for a woman.”  The silence drew out between them and he didn’t fill it.  “You
love
her.” 

“In the past two months, I’ve learned everything there is to know about Brie.  What I discovered surprised me, pleased me.  It didn’t prepare me for interacting with her face to face.”  He turned fully to face Harper.  “I love her.  You’ll love her.”

“I
refuse
, Elijah.” 

“Then you’re a fool.” 

Elijah walked around him to pick up his jacket.  Harper grabbed his upper arm roughly when they were side by side. 

It was a move they both recognized as dangerous. 

They stared at one another with
decades
of history, shared experiences, and loss between them. 

Harper hissed, “She’s just a
woman
.” 

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.  Brie has the capacity to save us, we have the capacity to destroy her.  I crave the former, I will protect her as well as I can from the latter.”  He pulled his arm free.  “Ready when you are.” 

Whipping his jacket off the chair, he shrugged it over his shoulder holster.  At the front door, he waited at attention for his boss to approach.  As Harper stood in front of him, he kept his gaze slightly over his shoulder as he’d been trained. 

“Elijah…” 

“You’ll be late for your first meeting if we don’t leave now.” 

He opened the door of the apartment and led the man he’d always sworn to protect through it.  He cleared the elevator, the lobby, the sidewalk, and nodded to the driver who was as well-armed, if not as well-trained, as Harper Delkin’s longtime head of security.

When they were inside the limo, Harper tried to return the conversation to Brie.  He shut it down.

“We’re outside the confines of secure space.  You have several meetings today; in places I’ve never cleared.  Place your additional commentary about Gabriella on hold until we’re once again in secure space.  I have a job to do.” 

“We’re not done.  Know that, Elijah.” 

* * *

Harper stared at the man he knew as well as he knew himself. 

In all the years they’d known one another, all the women they’d shared between them, Elijah hadn’t loved any of them. 

He involved himself physically but never emotionally. 

Looking back, he wondered if he’d joined Harper in ménage pursuits out of loyalty, duty, rather than independent will.

Gabriella Hernandez was the first woman to affect him.  She made Elijah think differently.  She had him rattled, twisted up inside, and acting out of character. 

Harper didn’t like it. 

Elijah was careful to keep his gaze averted, in full bodyguard mode as they crossed Manhattan for meetings that would consume the entire day. 

For now, Harper allowed him the distance he required to do a job he’d never truly enjoyed, despite being the most highly trained and dangerous man in the world.

It was impossible to shake him when he was like this but in the end, Elijah would share his every thought to help convince him of Gabriella’s worth to their lives. 

Harper admitted his curiosity about Winters’ former paramour and his lust to experience what she had to offer.

Other than that, he
refused
to allow her under his skin.

Chapter Five

 

Beginning October 2014

More than a week after Elijah’s visit, he returned.  He wore track pants, a t-shirt, and running shoes. 

In his hand was his violin case.

It was only when she heard his soft knock on the door that Brie realized she’d been waiting, hoping for it.  Seeing him on the other side of the threshold made her smile happily. 

“Hi.” 

“Hello, Brie.  How are you?” 

“Good.  Come in.”  When he closed the door behind him, she led the way slowly to her kitchen.  “I bet you’re hungry.” 

“How do you know?” 

Winking, she quipped, “You’re
male
.  Have a seat.” 

He watched her in silence for almost a minute.  “You’re in pain.  You’re moving more slowly today.” 

“I started the next level of physical therapy.  I’ll be fine.” 

Walking around the bar, he lifted her in his arms and placed her on the padded stool.  “Tell me what to do.”

Unsure how to react, she told him to make a plate of seafood lasagna she’d prepared the day before for Riya and Tawny.

“You’re not allergic to seafood, are you?” 

“I have no allergies.” 

The way Elijah stated it made her think that if he’d discovered he had an allergy, he’d have found a way to crush the weakness.

Removing the warm plate, he joined her at the bar.  She watched him eat and smiled at his obvious enjoyment.  He quickly ate every bite and wiped the corners of his mouth. 

“You’re an incredible cook.” 

“Thank you, Elijah.”  Moving to get off the stool, she said, “I’ll get us some coffee.” 

Lightly, he tugged her back.  “Tell me how.” 

Nodding, she watched him wash what he’d used and follow her instructions exactly for coffee the way she liked it.  Sitting beside her again, he smiled as she took a sip and sighed. 

“What have you been doing since I saw you?” she asked with her chin in her hand.  “Anything interesting?” 

“Meetings.  A lot of meetings.” 

“Do they bore you?  I was barely able to stay awake during my business classes in college.”  Chuckling, she added, “I’m shocked I received my degree actually.” 

“I didn’t go to college.” 

“You might not have a
degree
but I bet you attended every class with Harper.  Am I right?” 

“How did you know?” 

“You’ve been in charge of his protection for what seems like most of your life.” 

“I was groomed for the task from birth.  I’m almost two years older.  Upon news that he’d be born to Hunter and Hope, my true training began.” 

Brie inhaled.  After a long silence, she reached out to hold his hand.  He’d subconsciously tightened it into a fist as he talked.  Opening his palm, he clasped her back hard. 

“I met Hunter and Hope when I was a teenager.”  She was cautious about her wording.  “Did they know about your training?” 

He shook his head once sharply.  “Only my…father.  He presented me to the Delkins upon my eighth birthday with a promise to continue my training.” 

“Presented you?” 

“Gave me to them to protect Harper when he started school.” 

Oh god.

Frowning, she struggled to wrap her mind around what he was saying.  “Elijah, did
they
understand why you were with them?” 

He turned his face and she stared into beautiful light green eyes that she imagined had experienced more pain in more awful variations than anyone she’d ever met. 

“No.  They believed they were fostering me.  A task they were happy to assume to ensure I received the best education.” 

“But…you knew you were there for one purpose?”  He nodded.  “I can’t pretend to understand.  To hear these things makes me hurt badly for you.”

“I won’t speak of it.” 

“That’s not what I want.  I want you to feel comfortable talking to me.  Maybe it will help you heal from that time in your life.  Nothing you tell me will
ever
go beyond us.” 

“What about your friends?”  It wasn’t an accusation.  He seemed genuinely curious. 

She shook her head.  “No.  Hudson and Natalia know not to share any details about anything with me and they understand my need to keep things private.  There’s too much history.  It wouldn’t be right.”  Shrugging, she added, “I have to kind of stumble through on my own.” 

Elijah stood and wrapped his arms around her.  She hugged him back and loved the clean male scent of him. 

“If I admit the need to heal, I acknowledge my weakness.” 

“No,” she told him softly, “you just let it happen.  There’s nothing
weak
about you.  Even the toughest people experience pain and trauma.  No matter what happened, you made it to this moment as a man who’s strong, beautiful, and kind.  You could’ve turned cold or uncaring.  You didn’t.  You won.” 

Leaning back, his eyes roamed over her face.  A strong hand lifted and stroked through her hair.  He seemed fascinated by the texture, rubbing a thick strand between his fingers. 

“Could you love me, do you think?” 

“Yes, too easily,” she confessed without thought. 

“You’re honest without pause.  It places you at a distinct disadvantage.”  She shrugged.  “Could you love Harper?” 

“That’s a harder question to answer.” 

“Why?” 

“I’m drawn to you for reasons I can’t define yet.  I’m attracted to Harper but he clearly has no interest in more than a sexual relationship and that will probably carve out my insides.” 

“Is your attraction due to his similarities to Hudson?” 

Brie paused with a frown.  “No, though I admit it was interesting to me initially.  Kind of fascinating.  He’s similar in looks and mannerisms but very different in ways I don’t fully understand.  The
differences
entice me, even though it will be those that hurt me in the end.  Both of you are enigmas.” 

“You’re more astute than even I realized.”  The silence drew out between them.  “You offer us the possibility of love that asks for nothing in return.” 

“Love should be given freely, without condition.”

“I’d like to feel what that’s like, Brie.”  She didn’t know how to answer.  “I’ll protect you.” 

Inhaling deeply, she gave him a small smile.  “You won’t be able to, Elijah.  No matter how capable you are in the physical world, the emotional element is outside your comfort zone.” 

She watched him consider her words.  There was no doubt in her mind that much of what she said confused him. 

“You possess strong emotions.” 

“All my life, yes.” 

“You’ve been hurt.”  All she could do was stare at him.  “I promise to be careful with you.  I’ll try to temper Harper.” 

Smiling, she replied, “You’re only responsible for
yourself
.  Harper made his interest clear.  I proceed at my own risk.” 

He stroked his fingers from her temple to her jaw and her eyes drifted shut.  She
craved
his warmth. 

“You’re tactile like a cat.  I like that about you.” 

She needed a moment to think without looking into the eyes of a man who inspired powerful emotions already.  Since his first visit, she’d lain awake nights hoping he’d return.

When his lips touched hers, she gasped softly.  One hand wrapped around her as the other cupped her face. 

Elijah’s kiss was unlike
anything
she’d ever experienced.  It was a play to both sides of her nature. 

It called to the softness inside her that wanted to
give
love and
receive
love more than anything else.  She also understood that he was a man capable of snapping her neck.  He
wouldn’t
but his ability to do so was strangely stimulating. 

His focus was
incredible
.  The way his mouth worked over hers made her want it absolutely everywhere. 

Lifting away slightly, he whispered, “You’re an unknown to me, Brie.  I
want
to know you.” 

Deep inside, her heart tripped, felt as if it stopped, and then resumed beating.  As it did, it felt fuller.

There was a
new inhabitant
as he returned to kissing her. 

Pressing her palm to her chest caused him break it.  He stared at her hand for a long moment before raising his eyes to hers.  She didn’t realize she was crying until he stroked a tear away with the pad of his thumb.  The smile he gave her lit up his face, his eyes, his entire
being

Brie was
stunned
by it. 

Without a word, he gathered her carefully in his arms and carried her to the living room.  Placing her on the couch, he knelt at her side and reclaimed her mouth. 

She wanted to climb inside his body with him. 

The strength of her emotions in regards to him seemed irrational but her heart was on its’ own timeline.

Resting his forehead against hers, he gently massaged the back of her neck.  He whispered, “I want to play for you.” 

Holding his broad wrists, she nodded but wasn’t able to speak.  He walked to the kitchen and returned with his case, setting it on the coffee table and removing his violin. 

Then Elijah Eklund, a bodyguard known to many as the most dangerous man in the world, began to play.

Within ten seconds, Brie felt as if she was in a trance. 

Based on references to his childhood, she knew without asking that he’d never received lessons.  Like all child prodigies, he’d probably picked up someone else’s violin one day and the instrument showed him what to do. 

The notes flowed over her and Elijah clearly
loved
the way the music made him feel.  As he played, his entire body relaxed. 

It wasn’t until she was forced to inhale that she realized she’d been holding her breath.  The first song drifted away and he lowered the violin to stare at her. 

“I-I’ve never heard
anything
so beautiful, Elijah.”  Her words were barely audible.  “Please don’t stop yet.” 

Bending, he brushed his knuckles along her cheek and kissed her forehead.  “You like it.” 

Pulling him closer, she hugged his neck tightly.  “More than I can explain.  Your playing fills me with hope.” 

He planted a kiss on her neck and murmured, “Your heart is racing.”  She nodded against him.  “I’m glad you like it.” 

Kissing his way along her jaw, he claimed her mouth and she was breathless from everything about him.  He put the instrument down long enough to retrieve a blanket from her bedroom. 

“I want you to be comfortable, Brie.” 

“It soothes me,” she told him as he encouraged her to recline and covered her with the cashmere throw.  “I don’t want to fall asleep.  I don’t want to miss a single note.” 

Positioning the violin on his shoulder, he gifted her with another brilliant smile.  “You should rest.  I’m honored to help you do that.  Hope is a good emotion to carry you to sleep.” 

One song to the next, Elijah played.  Every note settled him deeper in a heart that had been painfully lonely. 

She watched him, listened to him, opened herself to loving him, and didn’t realize when she slipped into deep sleep. 

* * *

After carrying a sleeping Brie to her bed and leaving her another note, Elijah turned off the lights, folded the blanket he’d covered her with, and ensured the auto-lock was engaged.

Pulling the door closed, he met Harper’s eyes.  He leaned against the outer wall of her apartment.

“She sleeps?”  Elijah nodded.  “This will break you if you allow her too close.” 

“I want her
closer
.  I believe she already loves me.” 

Frowning, his lifelong friend said, “Impossible.” 

“Only you would suggest such a thing in regards to her.” 

Straightening from the wall, Harper faced him.  “She’ll poison you against me, Elijah.”

Stepping closer to the man he would willingly give his life to protect, he whispered, “She fears what you represent to her heart but will knowingly sacrifice her wellbeing for your needs.  She wants you despite understanding that you seek nothing more than sex from her.  I think she senses your dislike.” 

“I don’t dislike her.” 

“You went to such
lengths
to secure her yet have nothing positive to say in regards to her.”  Inhaling deeply, he handed Harper his violin case.  “It’s
you
who’ll break
her
.  It’s
your
fear that will poison what she could mean to us.  You’ll not lay those sins at her door.” 

Walking to the stairwell, Elijah descended to the lobby and went for a run. 

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