Radiant Shadows (17 page)

Ani didn’t steer; at the speeds they traveled back to Hunts- dale, it would be impossible for her to try to direct her steed. Barry was currently in the form of a GT by Citroën; one beauty of being able to shift form at will was that the steed could be a car that wasn’t even in production. She knew that Barry had plucked the image from her mind to make her smile, but even the joy of rocketing across the country in a matte-black version of the gorgeous concept car didn’t cheer her.

The weight of the situation felt like it had settled atop Ani’s lungs, making breathing more difficult than it should be. Faerie was dissolving, and Devlin could be caught in that. Ani wasn’t sure if she could go to Faerie. Sorcha had ordered Ani’s death; Devlin had disobeyed her.
Would she kill me if I went there? Would it be worse for him?
Ani couldn’t figure out whether she would be a help or hindrance if she went.

Being in Huntsdale where Bananach was didn’t sound particularly appealing either. She’d fled to avoid War’s attention, but the only faeries she knew who were strong enough to stand against Bananach were in Huntsdale.

If I’m going to die either way, I’d rather stay with him.
She was pretty certain
that
wasn’t a line of argument that would be useful in discussion with anyone. She glanced at Devlin. His eyes were closed, and his face was expressionless, but she felt his fear and anger. He wasn’t hiding his feelings.

“Why does Seth matter to Sorcha?” Ani asked. “I get that she made him a faery and all, but… what’s the big deal about him?”

“That’s a question I intend to ask the High Queen.” He reached out and laid his hand atop hers, entwining their fingers. “What I know right now is only what Rae told me.”

“And you’re not telling me everything, are you?”

“No. I’m not,” he admitted. Devlin pulled his hand away rather than hide his emotions. “The queen’s secrets aren’t mine to share, but… I can say that I need to bring Seth to her.”

“There are secrets about the queen and Seth?” she asked.

“Yes.”

They traveled in silence for a few moments until Devlin finally said, “She has Seth. Perhaps she will not oppose my being solitary.”

Ani stilled. “Could you do that?”

“Many faeries do so.” That wasn’t a real answer though: Devlin wasn’t most faeries.

Neither am I.

The idea of Sorcha letting him walk away seemed ludicrous. He was hers as much as Gabriel belonged to the Dark King.

Could I convince her to let me come and go in Faerie?

What happened next was dependent on so many things beyond their control and so many answers they didn’t know.

Like why she wanted me dead.

She reached out and took Devlin’s hand again.

He turned his head and opened his eyes. “I’m sorry I can’t set this aside, but after—”

“Duty isn’t something to apologize for.” She held his gaze. “I’m glad you aren’t afraid of me. I’m glad you found me, and”—she smiled—“didn’t kill me.”

His emotions vanished as he asked, “Which time?”

“Any of them.”

“And I am glad you didn’t kill me”—his emotional guard slipped only long enough for her to glimpse how worried he was—“and that you kissed me.”

She brushed her lips over his. “Which time?”

“All of them.”

They went back to silence as the landscape blurred around them.

With her free hand, Ani dialed Tish—and was dumped into voice mail instantly.

“Call me,” she said.

She was about to call Pins and Needles when the phone rang. home was on the caller ID. “Hey.”

It wasn’t Tish or Rabbit. Irial was calling from the shop number. “I need to you to come home,” he said.

Her hand tightened on her cell at his emotionless tone. “On the way already.”

“With Devlin?” Irial prompted.

“Yeah.” She glanced at Devlin. “He’s here. Did you need to talk to him?”

“Not yet,” Irial said. “Stay with him until you get here. Promise.”

“What’s going on? Iri?” Ani felt her hands start to sweat. “Talk to me.”

“I will. I’ll meet you
here
… at the studio.” His voice was gentle, but there was no doubt as to his lack of malleability. “Come home, Ani.”

“Is everything okay? Where are Tish and Rabbit? Are they with you?”

Irial’s pause was almost too long. “Rabbit’s here, and Tish is at my house.”

She disconnected and told her steed,
Barry, I need you to go faster. Can you?

Maybe a little.
Barry had already covered almost all of the distance they’d crossed, but holding two passengers and traveling at its fastest pace wasn’t easy.

Nothing in this world can move as fast as you
, she told the steed.

In this world or in Faerie, Ani,
Barry added.
I would be even faster there.

If I go—

If
we
go,
Barry corrected.
I am your steed, Ani. We will always be together… even though it means putting up with him.

After Barry’s voice faded away, Ani was left with nothing to do but break the silence with music or conversation. Strangely for her, loud music seemed unappealing, and conversation felt futile. Everything felt tenuous.

Devlin reached out for her hand again, and they sat in the dark of the car, silent and holding on to each other for several hours.

At some point, she fell asleep, and the next thing she heard was Devlin saying, “Wake up, Ani.”

Good idea,
Barry said.
We are here.

She blinked her eyes and tried to focus on the road in front of them. Now that they were in city limits, Barry had slowed to a normal speed and resumed his default appearance of a Barracuda.

I am exhausted, Ani.

“Rest,” she murmured. Gently, she stroked her hand over the dashboard. “No one has a better steed.”

“Agreed,” Devlin said.

They pulled around the back of the shop. Before the engine was off, Irial was standing at her door. He opened it and took her hand. “Come inside.”

Still sleepy, Ani let him pull her close to his side, but it
felt odd to be so near anyone but Devlin.

“What’s going on?” she asked.

“Inside first.” Irial looked over at Devlin, who’d immediately come to stand on the opposite side of her.

Ani stepped inside the studio. “You’re scaring me.”

The lights were all off, and the
CLOSED
sign was in the window. Through the glass, Ani could see several Hounds standing guard at both ends of the block. Devlin entered the studio, but positioned himself between her and the door, so anyone who managed to get past the Hounds outside would have to confront him. As nervous as she was, she didn’t object to being protected instead of standing beside him. He glanced at her, and then returned his attention to scanning the street, the shop, anywhere threats could lurk.

“Iri?” she asked.

“Sit down.” Irial tried to pull her over to a chair. “We can talk out here. Rabbit’s finally sleeping.”

“Rabbit’s
sleeping
?” She looked around, listened to the pervasive stillness in the studio, and felt her fears rise up. “Where’s Tish? Why is she at your house?”

“I’m sorry.” Irial had hold of her arm, keeping her still, trying to direct her to the chair.

“What’s going on?” She tugged her arm away. “Are they hurt? Who’s h—”

“I’m so sorry. I thought they were safe; I thought she…” Irial had tears in his eyes.

Ani felt panic rising. “Take me to Tish.”

She looked over at Devlin. He stepped closer to her.

Irial started, “Ani—”

“No! Where is she?” She pulled away from Irial and went toward the door that led from the shop into the living space of her home.

“Ani. She’s gone.” Irial pulled her hand away from the door, peeling each finger from the knob. “Bananach killed Tish. Tish is d—”

“No!” Ani shoved him. “She’s…
no
. Tish didn’t do anything. She didn’t have anything to do with Bananach. She’s…”

The floor seemed to come up to meet her as she slid down the wall. The world felt wrong. Her stomach twisted as everything that made sense in the world was suddenly gone.

“Tish is dead? My Tish gone?” Ani looked up at him. “When?”

“Last night.” Irial crouched down in front of her.

“How?” She pushed away every emotion, not by choice, but by necessity. Her feelings threatened to drown her. She shook from the intensity of the rage snarling inside her. Rage made sense, chased away the tears. Her skin stung like crawling things were all over her. It hurt too much to even let the anger well up.

Focus.

She took several breaths, caught Irial’s gaze, and asked, “How did she… did it happen?”

“It was quick,” Irial hedged. “Can we leave it at that for now?”

Ani stared at him. Her once-king, her protector all of
these years, was undoubtedly devastated too—and guilt- stricken.

“For the moment,” she whispered. There were tears inside, but letting them fall meant Tish was really gone.

She can’t be.

Ani stood. “I should go to Rabbit.”

“He’s fine. Your house is the safest place in the city tonight. I
promise
.” Irial reached out and brushed her hair back. “I’m sorry, Ani. We thought we had enough guards, and she hadn’t tried anything. There were Hounds here, and if Tish hadn’t…”

“Hadn’t what?”

“She slipped out.” Irial scowled; at himself or at Tish, Ani wasn’t sure. “You’d think they could keep track of her, and… I don’t know why she did it.”

“She didn’t like to be caged. She did better than I do, but after a few days, she was still Gabriel’s daughter, and…” Ani shuddered at the thought of telling her father. “Does he know?”

“He does. The Hunt all know.” Irial looked lost, like he wanted to say something that would make everything right, but there was nothing. “Ani…”

She looked at him, not wanting to comfort him, not wanting to hear his words, not wanting the conversation to continue.

“Go check on Rabbit, please? I need… I need…” Ani’s words faltered. She looked past Irial to Devlin.

He crossed the room to her side.

She folded her arms over her chest, but it didn’t stop the trembling.

“Bananach would have to kill me in order to touch Ani.” Devlin said the words evenly. “Anyone killing me is very unlikely.”

Irial looked from one to the other, and then he left.

The quiet in the room was so much worse than before. It was empty. Tish wouldn’t ever come running into the studio again. She wouldn’t be there arguing over the music they played. She wouldn’t scold Ani. She wouldn’t
anything.

Bananach had killed her.

Ani’s heart felt like it would stop, and for a moment she wished it would.
It should’ve been me.
Tish was gone, and Ani was left without her.

Ani looked at Devlin. “I want her dead for this.”

Devlin had no words for Ani as she stood there silently. He knew this was when comfort was to be offered. Logic insisted there should be something he could say. There really wasn’t. His sister had killed her sister.

Ani didn’t weep. She stared at him with dry eyes. “Help me? I need to fix… this.”

“It isn’t something you can fix.” Devlin wished there was more he could say, some word, some promise. He couldn’t. War destroyed lives, families, hope. If they didn’t find a way to nullify Bananach, this would be just the first member of Ani’s family to die.

Words weren’t of any use, so Devlin pulled her into his arms.

The tears she’d been refusing to let fall started to race down her cheeks. “I’d undo it all if I could. If you could’ve killed me, then Tish and Jillian would be okay and—”

“No. Neither of them would’ve wanted that.” Devlin
kissed her forehead and held her.

He wasn’t sure how long they stayed that way. Ani wept almost silently, her tears soaking his shirt and her cries muffled against his chest. Devlin knew it wasn’t even the edge of her grief, but her brother slept on the other side of the door. She wouldn’t wail now, not when it could upset Rabbit.

Devlin listened for the sounds of movement outside in the street or in the house, but heard only Ani and those who were there to care for her. Irial made a number of calls; the timbre of the former Dark King’s voice revealed none of the fury that Devlin knew lurked not far below the surface. Irial’s family had been stricken, and of all the courts, it was the Dark Court that held family as almost sacred.

Unlike the High Court…

Somehow, in the grief that was weighing on all of the house’s inhabitants, he needed to broach the reason for their return.

Irial opened the door. “He’s awake.”

Ani stretched up and brushed a kiss over Devlin’s lips. She didn’t speak as she went inside.

Irial and Devlin stood together for a moment. There was no way to ease into the discussion, and no way to postpone it. Seth needed to be taken to Sorcha. The timing was unpleasant, but the reality was what it was. Crises didn’t abide by schedules.

“We need to talk. Sorcha is unwell,” Devlin began.

Irial held up a hand. “Let me start the coffee first? I haven’t slept yet.”

Devlin nodded and followed the former Dark King into Ani’s home. Being there was disquieting. These tiny rooms attached to the tattooist’s studio were where she had healed from the consequences of what his sister had ordered, and now it was where she wept for the consequences of his other sister’s cruelty.

His sisters were the source of her pain. He walled his emotions up more tightly. He’d do what needed to be done, and he’d try to find a way to give her a better future.
Maybe I can return Jillian to her.

Ani stood in the hallway between the kitchen and what appeared to be the bedrooms. “Rab?”

“Ani.” Rabbit’s voice was raw with mourning. He stepped into the hall and grabbed Ani. “You’re safe. Gods, I was… You have to listen. You will do whatever it takes to stay safe from her. Tell me that. Tell me…. Promise.”

“Shhhh.” Ani wrapped her arms around her brother, holding him against the torrents of tears streaming down his cheeks. “I’m home. I’m sorry I wasn’t here. It’s my fault—”

“No,” Rabbit and Irial both answered.

Ani looked at them. “Yes.”

“No. Mortals are breakable,” Devlin said. “Even if you were here, she would’ve—”

Ani shoved past him back into the studio and then outside. The slam of the second door was accompanied by
the clatter of the bell that hung there—and Ani’s angry scream.

“Stay.” Irial put a hand Rabbit’s arm when the tattooist started to follow. He looked at Devlin pointedly.

As if I needed encouragement to follow her…

Seeing Ani like this was so outside his realm of experience. His own emotions were as locked up as they’d ever been, but it still ripped him apart inside. Ani was hurt.

Devlin went into the studio and paused. There were Hounds out there, and she stood just on the other side of the large front windows of the shop.
I could go through the window if she were in immediate danger.
The threat was too much.
I need to be beside her if there is an attack.
He took a deep breath before pushing the door open.

She refused to look in his direction. Instead, she stared resolutely at nothing.

He leaned against the wall beside her. “It wasn’t your fault. You must know that.”

Tears slid over her face, but she didn’t brush them away. They fell down her chin and cheeks, coursed down her neck, and dripped onto her shirt. Ani glanced sideways at him. “I don’t know anything right now.”

He sighed and tried again. “What do you need?”

“Rabbit made safe, and then your sister made dead.” Ani bared her teeth. “Breath for breath. She took my sister.”

“You can’t kill her.”

“Really?” Ani pushed off the building and spun so she
was standing facing him. Her feet were spread in a fighter’s stance. Her eyes were shimmering with the same sulfurous glow as the eyes of the Hounds’ steeds. “Tell me why.”

He’d told no one his sisters’ secrets. For eternity, he’d lived for them, but Faerie was coming unmade, and the mortal world would be devastated if Bananach brought about a true faery war. The time for protecting the twins’ secrets had ended.

“Come inside.” He held out his hand to Ani. It shook. The thought of her refusing him mattered more than anything should. He’d still be there if she grew cold to him, but it would ache the way few things ever could.

She looked at him with the monstrous green gaze of the Hunt. “Irial is inside. He won’t let me go after her.”

He nodded. “I know.”

“I am the Hunt. Tish is—
was
—my sister. She was a part of me, my best friend
. I cannot just accept this.
” Ani’s tears had stopped; rage hummed in her words and body. “No one kills the Hunt without vengeance. Gabriel might not have called her Pack, but
I do.
”

“Come inside with me.” He kept his hand outstretched and added, “Please?”

She took his hand in hers. “I want her blood, Devlin. I want her death. I want her to ache.”

He opened the door to the studio and motioned for her to precede him. “I understand.”

And he did. If anyone hurt Ani, he’d feel the same
way, but that didn’t change the impossibility of killing Bananach.

There is no return from this.
He wasn’t sure that a return had been possible for some time.

“I go where you go, Ani,” Devlin told her. “We need to talk first. I need to tell you and Irial”—he paused and considered the consequences of the trusts he was breaking— “truths that are not to be shared.”

She held his gaze. “I want her to hurt.”

He didn’t flinch. “I know, but I need you to listen.”

Mutely, she nodded.

He kept his fingers laced with hers as they went back to the kitchen.

“Rabbit’s… he’ll be back out in a minute.” Irial glanced at the doorway. “He’ll be better now that you’re here.”

Ani sat at the table, still holding Devlin’s hand in hers.

Devlin took the chair next to her. There was no delicate way to share what he had to say, nor was this the time for prevarications. He simply said, “If you kill Bananach, Sorcha will die. If Sorcha dies, we all die. The twins are balanced halves, the two energies that came first. Before them and after them, there is nothing. If you kill either of them, every faery will die. Maybe some of the halflings will live, but the rest… we all expire if she dies. Sorcha is essential. She is the source of all our magicks, our longevity, everything. If not, don’t you think Bananach would’ve killed her by now?”

Irial lowered himself to a chair.

Ani sat speechless for a moment, but then began trying to find the hole in his logic. She was irrepressible when she wanted something, and she very badly wanted Bananach’s blood. “How do you know? Maybe they just—”

“I know. They
made
me, Ani. I call them sisters, but before me, there were only two. The opposition, the balance. It’s what our whole people are based upon. Each court has its opposite. Too much imbalance will cause disaster. Sorcha… she adjusts what she must to assure stasis.”

Irial looked up, and Devlin caught his gaze.

“She will arrange against her wishes to assure the greater balance”—he did not look away from Irial as he made the admission—“even for that court which is her opposition, even as her counterbalance has abandoned Faerie to live among mortals. The Dark Court balances the High Court, but Sorcha requires
more
: since the start of forever her true counterbalance has been Bananach.”

“Well that just sucks, doesn’t it?” Ani leaned back, but she didn’t pull her hand away from his. “Bananach wants me to kill Seth and Niall—and oh yeah, she wants to kill me… and there’s not a damn thing we can do without killing
everyone
.”

No one spoke for several heartbeats: there was nothing to say.

Silently, Ani released his hand and left the room.

After Ani walked back down the hallway, Irial started, “Would Sorcha hide Ani?”

Devlin shook his head. “Sorcha ordered me to kill Ani years ago.”

Irial asked, “Because she saw that Ani would… what?”

“I was not privy to that information.” Devlin glanced at the hallway. “I can’t let Ani kill my sisters or let them kill her.”

Irial sighed and lowered his head again. “So we try to keep Ani, Rabbit, Seth, and Niall alive and hope War finds another amusement.”

Devlin felt a strange guilt at adding to the already complex situation. He weighed his words carefully and settled on, “I believe it would be… catastrophic should Seth be killed. In truth, it might be catastrophic if Seth doesn’t return to Faerie soon. Sorcha is asleep, mourning Seth’s absence apparently.”

“Well, that’s… not very orderly, is it?” Irial said.

“Something is wrong with my sister.” Devlin watched Irial pour several cups of coffee. To one cup, he added the cream and solitary sugar cube that Ani favored.

“We’ll figure something out.” Irial gave Devlin a knowing look that reminded him that he’d forgotten to cloak any of his feelings.

“I…” Devlin started. There weren’t words though, not ones he could speak. His envy over the way Irial knew Ani, his worry over her, his futile emotions—none were of the High Court. For a heartbeat, Devlin just stared at Irial, waiting for the mockery or chastisement or reminder that he wasn’t worthy of Ani.

Irial held out Ani’s coffee. “She needs you right now. Go.”

Devlin stood and took the cup—and paused at the roll of terror that told him that Gabriel had arrived.