[Ravage MC 03.75] - Rattle Me (5 page)

“Back at ya, kid.” Tears well in my eyes, but I hold them back.

Harlow comes next, smile beaming, and hugs me tight. “Anything. I’m here. I don’t give a shit what happens. I’m here for you no matter what.”

I choke back more tears. This is what I needed before and I have no one to blame but myself for not telling them about Mia sooner.

“Same goes for you,” I whisper softly.

“How did you tell him?” Princess asks, pulling away.

“Oh, I gotta hear this.” Ma comes up behind me, anticipation written all over her face.

“I wrote ‘
Hi Daddy’
on my belly for Valentine’s Day.”

“Holy shit! You knew then and didn’t tell me!” Harlow clips and I roll my eyes.

“Then I laid her down and fucked the shit out of her!” GT calls from across the room, and laughter erupts from the guys.

“GT!” I chastise. Seriously. Does he not have a filter when others are around?

“What, babe, I speak the truth.” His grin is so wide that it’s hard to be mad at the man. I love seeing him this happy.

Cooper bursts into the room. “Why you skeeming?” He doesn’t ask anyone in particular, just the group.

Harlow bends down low. I love seeing how much she’s taken on the mom role with Coop. “Buddy, Casey and GT are gonna have a baby.”

“Can I play wit him?” Harlow smiles.

“When the baby gets a little bigger.” Every time I see Harlow with Cooper my heart warms.

He turns and looks up at me. “Aunt Casey, you need toys.” And just like that, his curiosity is over and he takes back off through the house. He is very right, though, we need a lot for the baby.

“We need to have a party!” Ma’s enthusiastic voice cuts through the laughter.

No. No. No. No. It’s too early for everyone in the club to know. I can’t. I just can’t.

“Can we wait until next month?” Ma stills, but listens to me as I talk. “Then I’ll be around three months and I’ll feel more comfortable.” My melancholy silences the room and I didn’t want that, but couldn’t stop myself.

“Oh, baby. Of course.” Ma’s gentle tone warms my heart. GT puts his arm around his mom, pulling her to his body. I release a deep breath that I didn’t know I was holding.

“Let’s eat!” GT roars and then we do just that.

The night is beautiful and so is the happiness surrounding us.

“You want me to do what?” Harlow screeches, putting a huge smile on my face. I love messing with her, but this time I actually mean it.

“Yoga. Doctor says it will help with my stress.” The last two weeks have been a whirlwind, my emotions sometimes keeping me up at night. I swear my body is one ball of live wires and at any given moment one can snap or surge making me crazy. It’s like being ten weeks pregnant has short circuited my brain.

“And you feel the need for
me
to do this, for what? I’m not stressed.” She grunts, looking at me like I’m nuts and I probably am. I don’t think this shit will work, but I told the doctor I’d do what she said, so I’m doing it. I refuse to be a quitter.

“Because you
love
me and you want to help me.” I bat my lashes at her in that cute
please
kind of way. I swear for a second I can see her left hook coming at me, but it is only a brief jolt. She’d never really hit me.

“You are so fucking lucky I do,” she grumbles. I try to hold back the laugh that wants to escape and barely manage.

I smile. “Come on. You can change into my clothes. I got one of those videos from Target so we can do it in the living room.”

“I sure as shit ain’t doing it in front of anyone.” Harlow changes quickly into a pair of workout capris and a tank. I pop the video in and watch as three very skinny women stand on these mat things, which I don’t have. Hopefully the floor will be all right.

I move the coffee table out of the way, making enough room for the both of us. The narrator of the video comes on and he speaks with a Middle Eastern accent. He tells us to lie on our backs and spread our legs out in front of us. Harlow looks at me as if she wants to kill me, but does as the video says.

This supposedly is to stretch my spine, but all I’m doing is lying down with my feet out. Seriously? He tells us to breathe in and out, placing our hands on our stomach. I’m still not buying it and the tension pulsating off Harlow is so thick it’s tangible.

We follow the man’s instructions, slowly pulling our legs up one at a time. His voice is so calming that I begin to feel the tension leave my body with each maneuver. We move our legs from side-to-side one at a time. He has us stand up and Harlow eyes me out of the corner of her eye, but she’s still doing it.

We lift our shoulders up and down, his voice telling us to breathe and feel each movement of our bodies. I allow my mind to focus only on the task and ignore Harlow, and surprisingly, the tension coming off of her has lessened quite a bit.

When we are told to sit back down, I actually welcome it. We stretch our bodies this way and that, nothing strenuous, but there is a slight burn in my muscles. He next instructs us to lie on our stomachs and place our hands behind our backs, grabbing our feet from behind.

Harlow’s head turns toward mine. Her laugh is utterly contagious as I follow her and fall to the floor. What in the hell is this move. This is the pretzel shit I was talking about with the doctor.

“That wasn’t that bad,” I say as I turn off the video; it was definitely enough for one day.

“It wasn’t. I thought we’d have to wind ourselves together, not just stretch. I can handle that.” Princess looks utterly relieved that it’s over.

I laugh. “This is for beginners. I’m sure they do after a while. I just wanted to see what it was about.”

“How do you feel?” Concern laces her question, the strings on my heart pulling.

I think for a minute. “Good actually. I’m sure I’ll try it again.”

“I can’t say the same, but for you, I’ll do anything.” I smile up at her, loving every second of being with her. I missed her so much while she was locked up. I’m so glad she’s here.

Ever since the cops raided Ravage, they have been questioning all the guys. Most of the brothers were brought in just after Blaze’s shit went down. Lucky for me, I wasn’t there when they started asking questions. Unlucky for me, today is my day.

Cops brought me in this afternoon and I was not happy. Even more pissed off because the brown-eyed fucker that is glaring at me across the table is none other than Officer Lakin. He’s the asshole that ordered the cops to make their search of Ravage as thorough as possible. Fucking dick. I know he thinks that everyone associated with Ravage is a piece of shit, but I don’t give a fuck.

My lawyer showed up about twenty minutes ago and he’s out talking to cops. Since Lakin here can’t ask me questions because he pulled me in and I lawyered up immediately, we sit. He’s pissed, I’m pissed. What-the-fuck-ever. It seems like Burnzie is taking his sweet time getting his ass in here. I’m already hot for his ass that he took so long to get here after he was called.

When the door opens, Burnzie’s face is solemn. “Sorry, man, they found a warrant from three years ago from Sinapaw County. Says you failed to appear in court.”

“You have got to be fucking kidding me.” Shit. Lakin smirks and it takes everything inside of me to not leap over the table and beat his ass into the ground.

He shakes his head no instead of using words, probably feeling my anger coming off of me. “Sorry, I can’t get you out of here until we can get a bond hearing with the judge. I will fight it all fucking night if I have to.” He looks over at the cop. “You can go now. I need to speak to my client.” Fucker gives a small chuckle and leaves the room. Asshole better remember who the hell he’s dealing with. He’s already on Ravage’s and my shit list.

Burnzie sits down, his face grim. “Once I talk to the judge, I’ll get you out. It’s five and the courthouse is closed.” That right there pisses me off.

“So since you were late getting here I have to spend a fucking night in jail!” I fume. “Call his ass at home. I’m sure he owes us,” I growl, wanting to get home to Angel. She understands that I have club business, but I always get home to her at night. It may be four in the morning, but I get there.

“Tried, called him personally. He refused. Heard from a source, judge got busted a while back and has people up his ass. I’m guessing he’s watching his ass so close now, that he won’t risk a fuck up.” Burnzie stays standing but leans against the table.

Shit. I wipe my hands over my face, rubbing my eyes over and over. “Did you get me alone?” No way am I in the mood to fight off fuckers all night, but if I have to, I will. I’m sure we have some allies in here, too, but this precinct is pretty small. Hopefully there aren’t any enemies in with me.

“Yeah, but I wouldn’t sleep much if I were you,” Burnzie says, pissing me off more. Fucker.

“Call Pops, have him find out who’s here and make sure my ass is covered. Call Angel. Tell her that I’m fine and not to worry. I’m on club business and I’ll be home in the morning,” I order. Son of a bitch.

“Got it. I’m gonna step out and make the calls. I’m not leaving until they get you settled,” he says, moving to the door.

“Aww. How sweet.” Pissed doesn’t even come close to the anger bubbling inside me. I didn’t even know there was a court date let alone what the fuck it was for. Now this shit. I know I lied to Angel, but I can’t have her freaking out or stressing when I’ll be out tomorrow.

She’s been doing pretty well lately, keeping herself together, and I see her smile more than frown. I want to keep it that way.

An hour later, I am sitting in a cell, waiting for this to be over.

Club business. I sigh, eat a bit, and place the food I just made for dinner in the refrigerator then quickly clean the kitchen. Looks like a night alone. I rub my stomach and smile. Just knowing there is a small life inside of me squeezes my heart. “You stay in there, little one. You need to cook so you can come out.” Thoughts of Mia drift into my head along with my father and my stomach clenches, the pain cutting deep. I need to talk to them.

Grabbing my purse, I hop in my ’53 Chevy and head off into the evening. The trees pass by in a blur. Sometimes, I wonder why I do this to myself, but then always answer that I feel better after. I turn into the cemetery. It’s not the first time I’ve been back since Mia’s burial. It is the first time that I’m coming to talk about a new baby, though, which for some reason makes me incredibly nervous and guilty.

Stepping out onto the grass, I walk up to my father and baby, kneeling down on the soft ground. I brush the cut-up grass off the headstones along with all the other debris surrounding both. God, losing people sucks.

Hi, guys. Mia, I hope Grandpa is taking really good care of you, sweetheart. Who am I kidding; he’s probably spoiling you rotten.

Tears start rolling down my cheeks and my chest constricts.

Daddy, GT and I are going to have a baby.
My heart clutches.
I need you to help me out and keep an eye on this little one. I need you to help me keep the baby safe, like a guardian angel.

I breathe in deep.

Hey, baby. Mommy and Daddy think about you every single day. I have something to tell you.
I pause.
I’m pregnant and going to have a baby. That doesn’t mean that I will forget about you or not think about you, because nothing could stop that from happening. I love you so much and you will always be in my heart, in both of our hearts.