Raven (8 page)

Before I
closed my eyes that night, I took one last look towards the forest
– I'd purposefully left the blinds open so I could see outside. But
there was nothing but pitch black all around, the only lights were
those coming from the sky above, where a million glittering stars
squinted brightly. The night sky in this part of the world was
amazing. But just as I admired them, the pitch black reminded me
once more about something Gabriel had said before, that black was
the colour of magic. I wondered then if there was, in fact, magic
around me as I dozed off to sleep.

I found myself back in the forest, surrounded by the sounds
of running water and hundreds of birds twittering away. I was
standing in the same spot where I had stood earlier and so I
decided to do a bit of investigating. I climbed down the smooth
rocks towards the water. It was icy blue and sparkling so bright
that I had to shield my eyes.

As I bent down to touch it, a
raven flew down and stood to my left, followed by another one to my
right. They pointed with their wings to the opposite side of the
river bank. I looked up and saw two cats – one pure black and one
pure white. Their eyes as black as the night. They sat and watched
my every move. Even when the ravens took to the sky, they didn't
take their eyes off me. I looked upwards and saw them flying high
above me, watching me from above and I felt as though I was being
pulled between the birds and the cats. I couldn't understand but it
was as though I needed to follow them... but did I cross the river
to be with the cats or did I go upwards to be with the ravens? I
looked up again and in a matter of seconds, I was up there with
them, flying in the sky looking down on the two majestic creatures
below. Again I felt a pull between them but for now the feeling of
freedom, of flying, was just too good and so I remained with my
two
friends
as we glided effortlessly above the
trees. As I swooped down towards the water
I saw three birds below. Three black ravens, graceful and serene.
Then I realised what I saw was a reflection in the water. I was a
bird. I was no longer a teenage girl. I had become a raven. The
shock of the realisation temporarily stunned me and I had no
control over my body. I fell towards the water.

I awoke
with a thud... I'd fallen out of bed.

“
Lilly... are you all right my dear?” said a concerned voice
as a light was flicked on and my grand-father rushed in towards
me.

“
I
heard you scream and then there was a bang,” he said
worryingly.

I
explained I'd just had a strange dream and it had made me fall out
of bed. “I'm fine. No need to worry,” I said. But I couldn't help
but notice that he looked a little preoccupied.

“
A
strange dream?” he'd asked.

“
Just
a dream, Gabriel. People have strange dreams all the time,” I
laughed. “It's okay, I'm fine, go back to bed. I'll see you in the
morning.”

He said
nothing more, except to wish me a goodnight and he switched the
light back off as he left me to think about the ravens and the cats
and that exhilarating feeling of flying.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

A few
days had passed since Oliver's party and the Tulugaq family had
made me feel like I was part of their clan. I truly felt like I was
one of them, even though I often thought about my parents. I had
also started school. And although it was excruciatingly
embarrassing having to stand in front of my new classmates as I was
introduced, strangely enough I was welcomed with open arms by
everybody.

I did
have a feeling that being Jo's cousin had a lot to do with it.
That, and the fact that I have 'such a cute English accent,' they
said.

The most
surprising part about my going back to school was that I discovered
that my love of reading had stood me in good stead and I was more
advanced than everybody else in my year so I had managed to skip a
year... which had taken me by complete surprise.

During a
few lunchtimes with Jo I noticed she was the focus of many admiring
glances, from boys and girls alike. She was one of the most popular
girls in school and it wasn't just because she was beautiful or
because she had an aura about her. It was because she was caring
and friendly and was just really well liked by all... teachers and
students alike.

As we
sat and ate our sandwiches, Jo introduced me to some of her friends
but none of them stayed to eat with us. She said she had something
important to discuss with me alone and so her many friends happily
went and sat elsewhere.

“
Gabriel called me this morning Lilly, and told me you had a
strange dream the other night. Do you want to talk about
it?”

She
wanted to talk about a dream? I was surprised that such a big deal
would be made from a bunch of way-out thoughts that were going
through my head in my sleep.

“
Dreams are our unconscious mind trying to tell us
something. It could be something important. It could be a memory
from childhood that you're blocking, maybe...?”

I
laughed, “I don't think so, somehow, Jo. I dreamed I was flying. If
I was ever able to fly, I'm sure I'd remember.”

She
laughed too and we continued to eat in silence for a moment, but I
could sense there was something she wasn't saying.

“
How
come Gabriel is asking you about this, anyway?”

“
I
guess he thinks I'm the best person to speak to you about
anything... and everything. He can see we're becoming close and I
guess he wants to take advantage,” she laughed again.

“
So
you're like his spy or something?” I laughed.

“
Yeah,
I guess you could say that. But don't worry, I won't tell him
anything you don't want me to tell him.”

Why was
it such an issue? They were just dreams. Dreams weren't important.
Not to me anyway.

“
Well,
if you really need to know – and I don't mind you telling him – in
that dream, I turned into a raven. I doubt that's an early
repressed childhood memory though,” I said smiling, as I suddenly
recalled another dream I'd had. “Remember when I went into the
woods alone and fell asleep by the river? Well I dreamed of a woman
and a raven then too. There's something about these ravens here,
isn't there?” I laughed.

Jo
looked at me in a way she hadn't looked at me before. Almost as if
she was looking at someone else. “Jo?” I whispered.

Her
expression softened and she smiled and then the bell went,
signalling the end of lunch break. “Saved by the bell, eh Jo?” I
joked as she told me she'd see me later before I headed in the
opposite direction to my next class.

All
afternoon I couldn't shake the feeling that something strange was
about to happen. It was Jo's expression that had started it all
off. That feeling that she was looking at someone else even though
she was looking right at me.

When I
got back from school that afternoon, Meredith greeted
me.

“
Hi
sweetie! How was your day?” she asked, giving me a quick hug as I
dropped my bag on the kitchen floor and flopped down onto one of
Gabriel's handmade wooden chairs.

“
It
was okay, thanks. Where's Gabriel?” I asked, eager to sit down with
him and have a proper chat to find out, finally, just what was
going on.

“
I'm
afraid he's had to leave town for a day or two... which is why I'm
here. I'll be staying with you until he gets back.”

I tried
to hide my disappointment. I loved being with Meredith but I had
been hoping to finally get some answers. And why hadn't he told me
he was going away? Why was everything so secretive? Life seemed
even weirder all of a sudden. Instead of getting the answers I
craved, the questions were just piling up and I was becoming
increasingly frustrated.

Early
that evening, however, something happened to take my mind off
things. Oliver came round to see me. Yes... to see me!

Meredith
and I had just finished eating dinner, followed by a dessert
totally new to me: pumpkin pie. I'd only ever read that pumpkins
were for Halloween, after seeing pictures of them carved out to
make creepy lanterns. I'd no idea something so delicious could be
made from them. So there I was, totally stuffed with the top button
of my new black jeans undone, the jeans that Jo had given me when
she'd seen my wardrobe – or lack of it. So I was lazing on the sofa
when the doorbell rang. I assumed it would be for Meredith so I
stayed put, eagerly reading the first Harry Potter book which I had
found on the bookshelf, when in walked Oliver. Blood rushed to my
cheeks as I saw him standing there.

“
Hi
Lilly,” he said as I struggled to get up from the sofa and do up my
button at the same time.

“
Er...
Hi! What are you doing here?” I asked, hoping that I could make a
better impression this time.

“
Well... I was kind of in the area and thought I'd pop by
and say hello... so hello,” he laughed as he fidgeted with a pair
of gloves in his hands.

“
He..llo.” God I felt stupid. Why couldn't I utter more than
a few syllables to this boy?

He stood
and looked around awkwardly.

“
Er...
why don't you sit down.” He sat.

And then
silence again.

“
Can I
get you a drink?” I asked.

“
Sure.
A Coke would be great. Thanks.”

I rushed
into the kitchen, via my bedroom where I brushed my hair and put on
a little lip gloss (another gift donated by Jo), picked up two cans
of coke and walked back into the living room. He stood as I entered
the room and sat when I sat.

“
So...
Lilly. How are you settling in?”

“
Okay
I guess. Pretty well under the circumstances,” I said without even
thinking.

“
I'm
so sorry about your parents.”

“
I'm
sorry about yours too.”

“
Kindred spirits,” he said.

“
Sorry?”

“
I
guess we're like kindred spirits. You and me,” he said with a sad
smile.

I warmed
to him even more than before and all I could think was that I just
wanted to know everything about him.

“
I'm
sorry about the other day at your party. I didn't mean to be
rude.”

“
I
didn't think you were rude at all. I thought you were... kind of
cute, actually. Okay maybe a bit weird too,” he laughed.

He
thought I was cute!

“
I was
disappointed that you left so abruptly though. It would have been a
great party... if you'd stayed.”

“
Sorry,” I managed to mumble.

“
That's okay. I understand that being thrown into a party
after everything you've been through was probably a little tough.
All those people and stuff. I was very tempted to come after you
but I didn't want you to feel uncomfortable.”

“
Are
you always this quiet?” he asked as he turned to look me in the
eyes.

I looked
at him and shook my head, “No... not really. It must just be
you.”

“
Oh.”
He looked disappointed.

“
No...
I don't mean that in a bad sense. I mean, it's like at the party. I
just couldn't talk. I wanted to say so many things. I just
couldn't. And now, I don't know where to start.”

“
So
it's not because you don't like me, then,” he asked,
smiling.

“
Oh
no! Absolutely not. You're great. I guess I just get a little shy
around you.”

He
laughed.

“
Why
don't we start like this: I'll ask you some questions about
yourself and you answer?”

I
agreed. “So, do you miss England?”

“
That's a difficult one because if I say no, that's almost
like saying I don't miss my parents. But I honestly really don't
miss England. I never felt particularly alive there, if you know
what I mean. Here it's so different. I feel like I belong here. I
never felt that over there.”

“
I
don't think it means you don't miss your parents. Of course you
miss them. I still miss mine and they died a long time
ago.”

I smiled
sadly, “Ask me another.”

After a
few moments he asked, “What do you think of the Canadian
hospitality?”

I
laughed, “That's a funny question! But now that you ask, I never
realised people could be so nice. I haven't met a single person
here who has been unfriendly or rude. Everyone I've met – even just
briefly – has been wonderful. That's probably another reason why
I'm falling for Canada.”