Recipe for Love (39 page)

AS ZOE PULLED
her dress over her head she accepted that she had to go to the party although she was in tatters. She desperately needed to see Gideon and talk to him even if he was still ready to kill her. As she saw it, she’d had no choice but to do what she did and it was for him as much as herself. But would he see it like that? Or would he say – and he would have a point – that while Cher still had the pictures they still could be blackmailed and she had spoilt her chances of winning for nothing?

She wanted all her armour though. She wanted to be the perfect, elegant girlfriend. And it was nice to be looking glamorous for a change. He hadn’t often seen her in a dress with proper make-up and good shoes. She couldn’t compete with Cher, of course, who, tanned and Botoxed, plucked and shaped, was model-beautiful, but she didn’t need to care about Cher any more. Did she?

By clever timing, she and Becca managed to get into the same cab. Cher was still titivating and Shadrach had gone straight from the movie theatre where they’d watched the programme to the venue. He was probably going to be at the party wearing his chef’s whites, only in his case the word ‘white’ was no longer quite appropriate.

Mike came up to them. ‘Becca! Zoe! You look amazing! Really lovely. Not that you didn’t always, but now you
look
sort of – groomed.’ He looked at Zoe particularly and she managed a smile.

‘I am groomed. Really, there’s not a hair out of place – anywhere!’

Mike laughed. ‘Not too much information please! Becca, can I borrow you for a moment?’

Zoe would have liked Becca to chat to. She suddenly felt shy. The party seemed to be full of people shouting at each other and no one was familiar. Her mother really would have hated it.

Then she spotted Gideon. He was way over the other side of the room. She didn’t want to be the one who went up to him but felt she should give him a chance to see her by moving nearer. She put on a purposeful expression as she ‘excuse-me’d her way through the crowd.

As she approached her target she spotted Sylvie who’d supported her through the restaurant challenge and went to talk to her, grateful not to be ‘Norma no mates’ any longer.

‘Hi, Sylvie! How are you?’

‘Zoe! Hi! What a shame you didn’t win! You would have done if you hadn’t oversalted the steak. That’s really not like you. I thought you had a good palate.’ Sylvie seemed to take Zoe’s failure to win personally.

Zoe shrugged apologetically. ‘Oh, you know how it is. I got nervous.’

Sylvie shook her head still disbelieving. ‘Your fish was perfect though, or looked it. I’m glad about that.’

‘You were so helpful,’ said Zoe. ‘I’ll always be grateful for what you taught me.’

‘You were a good pupil!’ Sylvie paused. ‘What did Gideon say to you about oversalting the steak?’

‘I haven’t seen him to talk to since I did it,’ said Zoe.

‘He’ll roast you alive,’ said Sylvie calmly. ‘He knows how good you can be. He’s been telling everyone.’

This was a bit of a shock. It had never occurred to her that he would talk about her skills as a chef with other people. It seemed a bit indiscreet in the circumstances. In a moment of panic she wondered if he’d been indiscreet about anything else but realised a moment later that of course he wouldn’t be. He wasn’t like that. But it took her heart a moment to catch up with her head and stop fluttering like a wild bird in a cage.

Zoe braced herself. ‘I’d better go and speak to him.’ If Sylvie, only knowing half the story, thought Gideon would be furious then he was likely to eat her alive.

‘I’ll be here with a brandy and a wet towel if you need them,’ said Sylvie. ‘But making such a basic mistake …’

Zoe was just gearing herself up to have a conversation she knew wasn’t going to be remotely pleasant when a very beautiful blonde woman approached Gideon from behind. Gideon, who was talking to someone, didn’t notice her but Zoe and Sylvie were well placed to see how she planned to surprise him. She put her arms round him from behind and kissed his cheek. Zoe saw Gideon turn round in surprise, and then a big smile lit up his face as he took her in his arms in a bear hug.

‘That’s his wife,’ muttered Sylvie beside her. ‘I Googled him – you know, after we talked about him – in a stalkerish way, and saw it was her.’

Zoe felt herself sway and only just managed not to clutch on to Sylvie. She tried to force moisture into her mouth. She felt so sick and dizzy she wished she could faint to order. But she could hardly move. For some reason people were pressing nearer so she and Sylvie were crushed together. A discreet exit was out
of
the question. She looked at Gideon, willing him to glance in her direction and somehow make it all right. As she looked she saw the woman – his wife – pull him in closer. ‘Darling!’

Zoe didn’t know if she could hear the woman speak over the crowd or if she was just lip-reading but the woman’s body language was clear as day. This woman was very, very fond of Gideon. And he seemed just as fond of her. His arm was still tightly around her waist as she leant in to talk to him. He laughed at something she whispered in his ear. Zoe couldn’t bear to watch but nor could she move away. The press of people was just too much.

Then Gideon turned and saw Zoe. He smiled and beckoned her over. It was the jolt she needed to make her shift her paralysed limbs. He wanted to introduce her to his
wife
? How could he – how could anyone with any sort of heart do that?

‘Not a good moment to have a chat,’ she muttered to Sylvie. ‘And I need the loo. Catch up later.’ She started the process of escaping from the crowd but found herself looking at Gideon again.

He looked straight back at her, his expression bewildered.

He was unbelievable. Fighting tears she shook her head and began to push her way out through the crowd in earnest. She got out of the room and into the corridor. She was searching for the Ladies, wanting to be alone to get a hold of herself, when suddenly Gideon was in front of her.

He must have been far more forceful about getting through the throng than she had been. He looked confused – hurt even.

‘Zoe, what are you doing? Where are you going?’

‘Home!’ she said instinctively.

‘But we need to talk! I want to introduce you to—’

‘To
your wife
? You must be raving mad!’ She set off down the corridor as fast as her high heels would let her.

‘For God’s sake!’ He chased after her and caught her arm just as she reached the corner. ‘Zoe! You’re being ridiculous!’

She shook her head. ‘No I’m not. I’m being perfectly reasonable. You’re married. Your wife is here. You obviously love each other. Let’s not pretend it’s anything different. We had …’ She glanced up and down the corridor to make sure no one could overhear her. ‘… a fling. But I don’t want to break up your marriage. I’m just going to go home and carry on with the rest of my life.’

‘It’s not like that!’ Gideon looked down at her, frowning, his mouth compressed.

Zoe knew she was about to cry. She was tired, overwrought and very stressed. ‘Oh, find a new scriptwriter! That line’s very overused!’ she threw at him.

‘You’re being so unreasonable!’

‘Oh, am I? Well, I’m sorry I won’t join in with your cosy little “ménage à trois” but I’m just too old-fashioned!’

‘That’s not what I meant at all!’

‘It doesn’t matter. I’m breaking off whatever it was we had.’ Cruelly, her brain flicked back to their time at Somerby together when she thought they were a proper couple. She knew she wouldn’t hold the tears back much longer.

‘You can’t just walk out on us!’

‘Yes I can!’ She paused long enough to unhook her shoes from her feet. By a miracle she spotted a sign to the Ladies and ran towards it. She could hear footsteps behind her
and
broke out into a sweat. She had to reach the door before he reached her.

Assistance came from an unexpected source. An American voice called down the passage, ‘Gideon? Honey? There’s someone you really must meet …’

It made him pause and Zoe got through the door.

She leant against it until she was sure Gideon wasn’t following her in there and then took refuge in a cubicle.

She was splashing her face with water when Fenella and Glory came in.

‘Oh, Zoe! I am glad to see you. It’s such a crush in there I thought I’d never find you to say goodbye. I just want to change Glory’s nappy and then we’re off.’

‘Oh? So soon?’ Zoe suddenly felt as if her only friends in the world were emigrating, leaving her to live a long and lonely life on her own.

‘Yes. We want to get back. Glory doesn’t love being in the car. It’s easier if we travel at night.’ She put Glory down on the designated space and began unwrapping her. ‘What are your plans?’

‘Oh, I’ll go home too, I suppose. If that is a plan.’

‘Will your parents be disappointed that you didn’t win?’ Fen lifted up Glory’s legs and slid a fresh nappy under her.

‘Yes, but they won’t make me feel awful about it or anything.’

‘Do you feel awful about it?’ Fen looked curious. ‘You did so well!’

‘No. No, not really.’ Zoe felt so awful generally it was hard to tell how much she minded not winning when she knew if she hadn’t been blackmailed she could have done – or at least had a fighting chance.

‘So what will you do when you get home? Apart from having a rest?’

Zoe shrugged, really wondering if she’d ever have enough spirit to do anything again. ‘Slump for a bit and then start looking for jobs, I suppose.’

‘I don’t suppose you’d consider coming back with us? We’ve a big do on at the weekend and I could really use your help. It’s one of Sarah’s weddings.’

Zoe considered. In some ways she wanted to go home, to be cherished by her mother, who had comforted her through every disappointment in her life. But on the other hand, at Somerby she’d be busy. She wouldn’t have time to think about Gideon, or what might have been. ‘I’d have to ask my mum, make sure she doesn’t feel let down.’

‘Give her a ring.’

Zoe got out her phone. Her call was answered instantly. ‘Mum? Mum, I didn’t win. I’m not at all surprised. Becca, the girl who did win, was wonderful and she finally got her nerves under control.’

‘Ah, well, it was brilliant you got as far as you did,’ said her mother. ‘Were my coffee cups appreciated?’

‘Oh yes, and they’re coming back to you very soon. They’re being sent by special delivery.’

‘Aren’t you going to bring them?’

Zoe paused. ‘The thing is, I hope you don’t mind, but Fen has asked me if I’ll go back with them to Somerby. They’ve got a big do on and she needs help with the baby.’ She took a breath and played her trump card. ‘It would really take my mind off not winning.’

‘Then of course you must go to Somerby, darling!’ Her mother seemed relieved that Zoe had something nice lined up. ‘And you never know, there might be a job in it for you!’

‘Oh Mum, I won’t stay too long, I want to hug you so much! But I do feel it’s what I need to do just at the moment.’

*

‘I’m sorry to drag you away,’ Fenella apologised as they set off into the night. ‘Other people’s babies love their car seats and go to sleep instantly in them. Not our little Glory.’

‘That’s all right,’ said Zoe. ‘I’m glad to think I won’t be running into Cher by mistake. I feel a bit like I’m escaping.’ She hadn’t gone back to the party. She hoped people wouldn’t mind her not saying goodbye.

‘Oh?’ said Rupert, looking at Zoe in the driving mirror.

‘Oh you know,’ said Zoe, now hoping she hadn’t betrayed herself. ‘There’s been so much publicity and things. And Cher and I have never really got on.’

‘What about you and Gideon?’ asked Fenella. ‘Sorry to ask, but I couldn’t help noticing he seemed to be with someone else at the party.’

‘Yup,’ said Zoe baldly. ‘He’s married.’

‘Oh God, Zoe, I’m so sorry!’ said Fenella. ‘What a complete gobshite.’

Zoe nodded. ‘Yup. All men are bastards, present company excepted.’ She yawned loudly. ‘I might close my eyes actually. I’m a bit shattered.’

‘You do that,’ said Fenella. ‘I’m planning to do the same. We’ll plot Gideon’s ghastly death tomorrow.’

Zoe was tired but she wasn’t sleepy. However, pretending to be asleep would mean she didn’t have to talk.

The big Range Rover purred through the streets of London and on to the motorway, and in spite of her inner agonies, Zoe dozed off for real. When she woke up they were driving through the winding lanes of Herefordshire and nearly home.

Although it was summer, when they arrived back and Fenella had fed Glory, she insisted on giving Zoe a hot-water bottle and Rupert demanded she accept a stiff drink.
Taking
both with her, she went up to her allocated bedroom which, unfortunately, was the one where she had slept with Gideon. Fenella put a sympathetic hand on her arm. ‘I’m sorry, but the bed is made up and I don’t want you going in the cowshed. I think you should be in the house, with us.’

Apart from the inevitable poignancy of sleeping in the bed where she’d been so happy with Gideon, Zoe was glad she was in the house too. The hot-water bottle and the whisky, as well as an exhaustion natural after all she’d been through, meant she drifted off almost immediately.