Red Flags (33 page)

“Jason, last time I am going to tell you to
leave, before I call security… and all the fucking money in the
world won’t buy you out of this one. Now leave!” He shook his head,
but turned and stormed out of the apartment. My attention turned to
Mila, who was intentionally trying to keep her distance from me.
“You are the dirtiest kind of bitch,” I said through clinched
teeth, “I always knew you were a whore, and I should have listened
to my initial thoughts instead of trusting you.” Rage flared
throughout her face, and she stepped into my face, screaming some
obscenities that came across as nothing more than mumbles. Chelsea
jumped in between the two of us and pushed us away from each
other.

“I’m not breaking up any cat fights, so you
catty bitches need to take this somewhere else.” She scolded, and
glared back and forth between the two of us. I frantically worked
to slow my breathing -- the anger that had surged throughout my
body left me near hyperventilation.

Mila stepped away from both Chelsea and I and
as she stomped back to her room, she turned and yelled to me,
“You’re fucking crazy Cara. Get your shit together.”

Chelsea held me with one arm across my chest,
preventing me from running back to Mila’s room. I had never been in
a physical altercation in my life, but in this firestorm, I felt
like I could bring myself to a fight -- and win.

A few minutes passed and Mila came thundering
out of her room with bags in her hands, and I took the opportunity
to scream out to her, “Whose bed are you trying sleep in, Ryan’s or
Jason’s?” She looked back to me, her long, silky hair angrily
wrapping over her shoulders, and I continued, “Better make it
Jason’s because after I call Ryan, you’ll be toast there.” She
exhaled loudly, pursed her lips together, and then stalked out of
the apartment, slamming the door after her.

Chelsea looked to me and without even asking,
I knew she wanted an explanation. I resigned myself to finally fill
her in on what had happened as I left the athletic building. She
closed her eyes and winced, then pulled me into a hug and rubbed my
hair -- allowing me to cry.

After what felt like forever, I sluggishly
made my way to my bedroom and called Ryan. After the second ring,
he picked up and his cheerful tone sent me back into a sobbing
mess.

“What’s wrong Cara?” He asked, in an alarmed,
yet sympathetic tone.

After trying frantically to catch my breath,
I finally gathered myself enough to drop on him, “Your girlfriend
is the whore I always thought she was.” I regulated my breathing
after getting my main thought out in the open.

“What? What the hell Cara? I know you and
Mila have had your problems, but why would you go there?”

“Because Ryan, I’ve been seeing too much and
I am finally putting it together. Jason left for a week; no one
knows his whereabouts except for Mila. They text frequently…
apparently they talk just as much. In Vegas, did you know she left
with him?”

“What? No.” His voice was filled with
surprise.

“Yeah,” I continued, “they left together and
Chelsea and I confronted them, but they both denied any wrongdoing.
Then today, today was the final straw. I overheard them talking
about telling me and not being able to keep quiet anymore…”

“Are you sure it’s what you think it is?” His
voice was showing signs of fleeting optimism.

“Yes Ryan. Wake up! I know you like her and
all, but she is no good… and neither is Jason.” There was a long
moment of awkward silence, before Ryan sighed heavily.

“This is so shitty, but thanks Cara. Who are
you home with?”

“Chelsea,” I answered quickly.

‘Ok good. Please don’t let her go anywhere,
stay with someone tonight, please? I can come down if you’d like,”
he offered, but I quickly shot down the invitation. “Alright. I’m
going to call Mila. Hey, chin up sis. I love you!”

“I love you too.” I answered back, and fell
back on my bed, ending the call. I shut my phone down, and placed
it at the end of my bed and fell asleep, fully clothed, eyes red,
heavy and burning, and emotionally drained.

Chapter 16

The night was a blur. I spent so much time in
and out of crying fits, blowing my nose, letting Chelsea rub my
head, and ignoring phone calls, that by the time I actually fell
asleep, I felt like it was time get up. After a quick glance at my
phone, I realized that Jason had ridiculously called my phone every
five minutes for at least six hours. I couldn’t stand the sight of
his name, and I certainly didn’t want to see his face. Mila was
basically in the same boat; for all I cared, they could have each
other.

There was a knock on the door and Chelsea
bounded to it. Her excitement faded when she saw Chase on the other
side.

“Oh. Hi Chase.”

“Whoa. Hi to you too Chelsea.” He said
sarcastically, and smiled apologetically. I stood in the foyer,
hands crossed over my shoulders, thankful that Jason wasn’t
standing at the entrance of my apartment.

“Sorry, I thought you’d be Hunter, he’s
late,” Chelsea whined, and turned to head back into her bedroom. I
led Chase into the living room; he took a seat on the couch, and I
plopped down on the opposite end, looking every bit as exhausted as
I felt.

“I just haven’t seen you since you guys got
back. I wanted to come tell you myself how proud I am of you and
that I’m sorry things turned out the way they did.” I managed a
genuine smile, which was something that had been terribly difficult
for me lately.

“I appreciate it Chase. It was a rough
day.”

“And you look like you’re still having a
rough day, three days later.”

“Why thank you,” I retorted, full of sarcasm.
“It’s been a rough couple of days.”

“Let me guess. Your wonderful, fantabulous,
boyfriend?” The look I shot in his direction was enough to confirm
every thought on Chase’s mind. “What happened?”

“I don’t really want to talk about it.” I
managed to strangle out. The mere thought of having to rehash that
very painful conversation again rushed tears to my eyes.

“Okay, I won’t pry.” He shook his head in a
show of disapproval, but didn’t continue with the conversation.

After another hour of watching TV, we left
for classes. I stopped by Professor Velez’s office to let him know
that I wouldn’t be in class the next evening. He thanked me for my
proactive move and offered the study guide for the final exam. The
truth of the matter was I couldn’t imagine being in the same
classroom as Jason and being able to function, so rather than sit
in class with him, where I was sure he would pester me, I took the
chance to study and prepare on my own. The compassion in Professor
Velez’s eyes was a clear indication that my breakup was written all
over my face, and I wasn’t taking it well

The night was a lazy one; Chelsea was off
with Hunter, and Mila still hadn’t come home. Apparently, Ryan
didn’t see the significance in the information that I’d given him,
or maybe she was with Jason. The thought made my skin crawl, so I
shoved it out of my mind and started on my note cards. It wasn’t
long before I was off to sleep, with books and index cards strewn
all across my bed.

<>

The sweet aroma of coffee woke me around
seven fifteen in the morning. I stepped out into the hallway to
find Chase and Chelsea sitting at the table talking. They both
looked at me at the same time, and Chase held up a cup, inviting me
over to join them. He said he had tried to call, but my phone went
straight to voicemail, and I remembered that while I was studying
the night before, I turned my phone off after having to
continuously ignore Jason’s phone calls. I apologized for my phone
being shut off, and ran to retrieve it, hoping that I hadn’t missed
anything from my parents.

“Cara. What are we doing for your birthday
this weekend?” Chelsea yelled.

“I don’t know… I don’t really feel like
celebrating.” I replied, dryly.

“Well, that’s too bad, because I do. It’s
another year of life that you are my best friend, so we’re going
out. What do you think Chase?”

“Hell yeah! We’re taking you out Cara,
whether you like it or not.” He said, grinning and sipping his
coffee.

I tried hard to stifle a smile but failed
miserably. Chelsea and Chase were right; I had every reason to
celebrate and I refused to allow Jason to trample on that
happiness.

I went to my classes and made it through
final exam prep after final exam prep. Without softball, my days
just seemed so empty, but Chase and Chelsea had promised me a night
of fun set for Friday night, so I tried hard to focus my mind on
them, instead of thinking about every angry, bitter thought that
kept creeping its way into my head.

As seven pm struck, thoughts of Jason sitting
in his seat, awaiting me for Professor Velez’s class entered my
head. I tried to picture his look of anticipation which slowly
faded to disappointment as the minutes passed by. I would be lying
if I said the thoughts didn’t bring smiles to my face, but on the
same token, my heart ached at the thought of me having to avoid the
one guy who had stolen it.

Mila came roaring through the door, loud as
ever on her cell phone, but stopped talking as she noticed that I
was still at home. She didn’t say anything to me and proceeded to
her bedroom and quietly shut the door. The jealous side of me
wanted to go and stake out in front of her door, and spy on her
conversation, but I turned to sanity and decided to let it go. I
only had a couple more weeks at the apartment and I wanted to make
them as pleasant as possible. I walked to the kitchen to grab a
snack, when I heard her door open and saw her making her way
towards me. Not another fight.

“Chelsea tells me you’re going out tomorrow
night for your birthday.”

“Yup,” I replied, trying to keep my
conversation with her to a minimum.

“Any idea where you’re going?”

“Nope.”

She sighed, and ran her fingers through her
hair. “Cara, I’m not screwing Jason or whatever the hell you think
is going on, and I certainly don’t appreciate you telling your
brother that either.” I looked at her, refusing to blink, because I
wanted her to know that I wasn’t buying her bullshit. “So am I
invited to celebrate your birthday or what?”

“You can do whatever you want Mila.” And with
that, I stalked out of the kitchen and into the safe place of my
bedroom. I heard her get back on her cell phone, only this time, I
could care less who she was speaking to, or what she was speaking
about. I cranked up my music and started rummaging through my
closet to find the perfect outfit for my Friday night birthday
celebration. Technically, my birthday wasn’t until Sunday, but with
finals coming up, no one would be partying on a Sunday.

Friday morning came and astonishingly enough,
I’d managed to have a fulfilling night’s sleep, with no
restlessness. I woke up feeling rejuvenated, and quickly threw on
some clothes to go out for a run. It was as if I was a new woman.
My energy levels were back up, the melancholy sadness forever
looming over my head had disappeared, and I was ready to tackle the
day. I took the long route through campus, and as the sun beamed
down on me, the sweat was a welcome feeling of being alive. The
last few days I had never felt so far gone, and now, I felt like I
could tackle the world.

I entered back into an apartment that was
blaring music like we were in a nightclub. Chelsea and Mila were in
the kitchen blending smoothies and Chelsea tossed an apple my way
as I passed by the kitchen opening. I caught it and smiled, took a
huge bite and continued on my way back to the shower. I made quick
work of cleaning myself, and went back to the kitchen where a
smoothie had been set aside for me. Chelsea, with a smoothie
mustache on her face yelled out over the music, “we’re going to The
Spear tonight, nine o’clock.” I nodded my head, and continued
drinking.

<>

The Spear was a local college dive bar. The10
minute drive it took to get there was enough for me to call my
parents, let them know that everything was great with me, and hang
up. The inside of the bar had pictures of local musicians who had
gone on to become local celebrities, guitars, different labels of
beer, and of course – girls, plastered all over the walls. There
was a stage for live music in the back right corner, and luckily,
because it was Friday, a local band by the name of The SDs (short
for Smart Dummies) was playing tonight. We walked in and made a
beeline for the bar, which had no sitting room. Chelsea barged her
way to the front, flirting with the bartender, who sent extra shots
our way. Leave it to Chelsea to get these guys to do anything for
her.

Chase found us some empty seats near the
stage, and round after round came out. So far, Chelsea had ordered
three tequila shots, two Amaretto Sours, and a Cape Cod – all for
me. I never drank this recklessly, but I was warned that I would
unwind and have a good time or else, so I decided to heed the
warning, and let loose. We people watched for a while and Chelsea
spotted some people she knew from class and got up to mingle with
them. I kept pointing out girls that I thought would be a good
match for Chase, and he politely turned all of them down. The
alcohol fueled my frustrations with him and I couldn’t stop my
mouth from blurting out, “are you gay or something?”

He laughed loudly, and choked on his drink.
“Uh no! And what if I were?”

I shrugged, and laughed, “no problem with me,
just wondering. You’ve shaken off every hot girl I’ve pointed out…
every single one of them.” I continued to knock back the Cape
Cod.

“That’s because you haven’t pointed yourself
out to me,” he said, eyes locked on me, and now rubbing the top of
my hand. For a second, I thought I might have felt a small fickle
of a flame go off inside of me, but the SD’s started up and broke
that unwelcome feeling.