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Breathing out those words to him is a weight lifted off my shoulders. My heart doesn’t break like it normally does when I think or talk about Evan, instead my heart is beating for Mason and his strength. He’s so strong: physically, emotionally and psychologically. When I think about us, together, my own feelings mattered. I didn’t think about how he feels or consider his own hesitations. Our hearts are trying to find a way to be together, without the guilt or concerns of moving on, and yet we struggle with bumps along the way. Maybe that’s life telling us we can make it because no one gives you more than you can handle. At first denying my feelings for Mason is what I did and now I don’t want to do that anymore. I need to let him know he’s not fighting anyone for my heart, body and soul.

“You’re not fighting a ghost, Mason. I’m here with you. Completely and whole heartedly.”

Mason doesn’t say anything. Instead he looks at me and his lips curve into that sexy smile I love so much. Slowly getting up from his chair he leans down and kisses me. “You’re perfect,” he whispers on my lips.

“No you are.”

We enjoy the wine and appetizer before ordering our dinner. Instead of talking about how we feel I tell Mason about going back into teaching and since September is only around the corner I think it’s time to get my life back on track.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” he says and takes a bite of his lamb.

“Is there really a mole in the department?” I lower my voice and make sure it’s quiet enough so only he can hear me.

The mole, the rumor, hasn’t been a thought until now. I didn’t care about what was going on in the department, but the more I think about it the more I wonder if the “mole” has anything to do with the shooting.

“Care . . .”

“Please don’t hide anything from me, Mason.”

He looks around and puts down his fork and knife before talking. “When Rico died in our custody something didn’t feel right. Clarke looked at his death as nothing since Rico was a drug dealer and rapist. To him, in his eyes, it was a criminal off the streets, never to hurt anyone again. Something inside me told me to not let it go. I’ve been going through some things and investigating as much as I can. Scott and I are digging a little more. He’s looking up his own information because he feels the same as I do.” Mason lets out an exhausted sigh and takes another bite of his dinner. “Nothing. I come up with nothing. No one talks about it since Clarke doesn’t want to go by the words of a known criminal. Scott and I both know something’s going on.”

“Still your gut is telling you something.”

“Yeah it is. I told Scott last week to calm down with the investigation. Things are weird at the station and officers are getting gossipy.”

“Do you think it has anything to do with Evan’s death?”

“Honestly, I’m not sure, Care. There’s a lot going on and as much as I want to tell you I can’t and hope you can understand.”

“I do. Thanks for letting me in.”

“You’re welcome.”

Now something inside me is telling me Mason is keeping something hidden. Even if he is I can’t hold him at fault. I can’t blame him for holding information from me. As much as I want to push him and make him tell me I can’t. Being an officer means protecting and serving. He’s protecting the privacy of the cases and victims. He’s protecting this community and he’s protecting me.

When we finish dinner and dessert, Mason pays for the check and talks to Stephanie for a few moments before we leave.

“I can’t wait to get home and relax with you.” Mason smiles and I realize we’re not going home. “Where else are we going?”

“You’ll see.”

Watching him drive and where he’s going I notice we’re on highway 490 and heading to Victor. Mason’s hand rests on my thigh again and the anticipation of what’ll happen builds inside me.

“Patience, baby.”

“Okay.”

“I need you to close your eyes and promise you won’t look. I’m trusting you. If you look then everything will be ruined and you’ll go back home and I’ll drive to my parents’ house. Understood?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Now close your eyes.”

I close my eyes and just enjoy the feel of the ride and after about ten minutes the car comes to a stop. I hear Mason’s door open and soon mine is too.

“Take my hand, Care.”

“Okay.” Taking his hand I feel his other hand on the small part of my back. “You still can’t tell me where we are?”

“No not yet. Almost there.”

There’s noise around me and then I hear a ding like an elevator. I think we’re at a hotel.

Hotel?

HOTEL!

Hotel.

Just the two of us.

Hotel.

Just the two of us and we’ll be alone.

Hotel.

Being alone means sex. He expects sex.

“Calm down,” he whispers in my ear and places a soft silky blindfold over my eyes. “You’re smart I know you know where we are and I know your discomfort. Don’t worry, okay?”

“Okay.”

His hands rest on my shoulders and it’s soft, sensual and all Mason. .

“Just feel me, Care. Feel me around you. Feel me touching you, whispering in your ear, and how I feel about you.” He pauses, lightly touching my shoulders, running his hands down my arms and back up. “Do you feel it?”

“Yes,” I shakily answer. “I feel you.”

The ding sounds and Mason guides me out. We take a few steps and stop. Mason does something and soon he’s guiding me again into a dark room. Light emerges and I turn around waiting for the blindfold to come off.

“Okay, okay,” he laughs and when the blindfold releases there are rose petals all over the hotel room floor and music lightly playing. The room is romantic, sensual and a piece of Heaven.

“Mason,” I gasp. “What’d you do?” Turning around again I head to the bathroom where the music is coming from and see two champagne glasses and chocolates on the sink counter. The tub is full with bubbles and when I look back, Mason’s leaning against the door frame with a smile on his face.

“Take a bath. I’ll be back in to wash your back and we’ll share some champagne. Sound good?”

“You’re not going to take a bath with me?”

“No, Care. It’s all about you tonight.”

I nod because words don’t exist. I watch as Mason leaves and I’m not sure what to do. Tonight’s all about me. Standing in front of the mirror I pinch my face to make sure I’m not dreaming and slowly take a breath in and let my breath out.

“Tonight’s all about me,” I repeat a few times before taking off my dress, bra and panties. Standing before the mirror naked I take a few more breaths before climbing into the warm tub and sinking in. The warm water feels nice on my body and for a moment I let go . . . just let go.

“You look relaxed,” Mason says as he walks in wearing the same clothes as he did to dinner. “Turn around so your back is facing me.”

“Okay.”

I do as he says and feel Mason’s strong hands warm on my shoulders. The smell of lavender fills my senses and I place my head down and indulge in the massage he’s giving me. Rolling my head from right to left, a little moan escapes me and Mason’s grip gets a little stronger. I smile and lean more into his touch.

“Lean your head back and keep your eyes closed.” I do just that and Mason plays with my hair, working his way to my scalp and massages my head.

“Wow. You’re so good.”

I hear him laugh and he massages more. “I told you tonight’s all about you, baby. My mission is to make sure you’re completely comfortable and I’m giving you everything you need.”

“Just you being here is what I need. Everything you’re doing is a bonus.”

“Good to know, but I still want this night to be perfect for you.”

After Mason’s done massaging my body, he helps me up from the tub and wraps a towel around my body. He looks at me, but not like a horny teenager. He looks at me with admiration and tenderness. He’s studying me and getting to know me. Grabbing the champagne glasses we head out and Mason guides me to the bed.

“Cheers to a great night.”

“Cheers.”

Drinking the smooth champagne, while still in my towel, I get on my knees and place one hand on Mason’s knee.

“Thank you for tonight. I appreciate it.”

“I know you do.”

“So how was your date?” Tonya smiles and drinks her lemonade.

“Not expected,” I tell her. “No sex, just cuddling and him taking care of me.” Playing with the necklace Mason gave me I rest a little easier and smile remembering waking up and seeing him watch me. The moment I felt the necklace I saw the smile on his face-his happy and sweet smile.

“Wait? What?”

“Yeah, I know. Trust me. I don’t know what to think or how to feel. We shared some kisses, I mean hot kisses, but nothing else. It was like I don’t know. Maybe he was scared or something.”

“Mason Ryan? Scared? No I don’t think so. Did you seduce him or anything?”

“Not really,” I answer and drink the rest of my lemonade before pouring more.

“Have you guys talked about it?”

“No. He dropped me off and is doing a double shift so I won’t be able to talk to him until tomorrow morning. I don’t know, Tonya!”

I play last night in my head and I can’t figure out what’s going on. Maybe Mason’s respecting my space and understands having sex is a big step. If so then I guess I can’t be upset or anything. I appreciate his concern for me and love how he puts me first.

“Talk to him. But I gotta get going.” Tonya gets up and kisses the top of my head before leaving. “PS, I love that necklace.” She winks and lets herself out.

I don’t have much planned so instead of staying home and thinking I head to the one place I know will keep me busy . . . Target.

Parking my car I head inside with a cart and aimlessly walk around to see if I need anything or want anything. This place is called Target for a reason. It’s the place you can spend hours in and not realize what’s going on. This store is like an unhealthy habit you can’t get rid of. It lures you in and whispers
buy me. Touch me. Want me.
It’s a place you can go and plan on buying something small and walk out with a cart full of stuff.

I walk through the cleaning aisle and nothing catches my eye. There are enough cleaning products to last me all year. Then I head to the appliance aisle and see a few things I can possibly use: new Keurig machine, crockpot, rice steamer and a blender. This isn’t just an ordinary blender, it’s a Ninja and I remind myself to go onto Pinterest to look up smoothie ideas. Placing each item in my cart I feel my phone vibrate in my purse.

Tonya: Gym tomorrow morning?

Me: Actually yes. I’m buying a Ninja and gonna make yummy smoothies!

Tonya: With alcohol?

Me: Seriously?

Tonya: Do not judge me.

Me: Of course not. ;)

Tonya: Judger McGee!

Me: LOL you’re a trip.

Tonya: But you love me. <3

Me: I do. <3

I stay near the home goods area for a while and before I know it my cart is full of the appliances, new curtains, throw pillows, bed sheets, a comforter, blanket, pillow cases and some decorative pieces that will make the house look brighter. I’m about to check out when I notice decorative wine glasses that are calling my name.
Caroline come check us out and buy us. Bring us into your home and sip on us. Doooooo ittttttttt.

The staff at Target are so sweet and help me load my purchases into my SUV. Deciding I need to go home now I pull into my driveway and to my surprise Mason’s getting out of his squad car.