Relentless (Relentless Soul Book 1) (18 page)

Brody

Stepping into the dressing room with Hunter, I have no idea what to expect. After last night nothing would surprise me. Looking around the small room I spot Jeremy on a chair leaning forward with his elbows resting on his legs and his head in his hands. As I close the door behind me, he glances up and gives me a tight smile.

"Hey, man."

"Hey, Jeremy." I feel my shoulders stiffen as he stands up and walks toward me.

"Look, I want to apologize to you for last night. I shouldn't have done that to you. You've been really good to Ava and she is really lucky to have you in her life." Fuck, there's that guilt again. Jeremy walks closer to me and pulls me to him for one of those man hugs.

"No hard feelings?"

Shaking my head I hug him back, I may as well stab him in the back with a fucking knife while I'm at it. "No. No hard feelings."

Smiling as he pulls away, Jeremy says "Good. Now, let's go fucking rock this joint!"

We did rock the joint and the noise of the crowd is still buzzing in my ears hours after the show has ended. We're all on the band bus having celebratory drinks, but I've noticed Jeremy is pacing himself tonight. Ava is sitting beside him on the couch and his arm is around her shoulders. She looks as uncomfortable as I feel and I wonder if she knows about what happened in the dressing room last night. I doubt that Jeremy would have been forthcoming about the events leading up to the show. But I think Tori and Emma may have heard more than they were letting on. Judging by the daggers that Tori is sending Jeremy's way, I think she definitely knows more.

"Man. I can't believe we head home tomorrow." Hunter's voice breaks my train of thought and I look over at him to see Tori rubbing his thigh.

Jeremy agrees. "I know, dude. It's kind of bittersweet. It's been cool being on the road and playing all of these shows, but I'm kind of looking forward to things going back to normal too."

Ava stands up suddenly announcing that she is feeling tired and she's going to head back to her bus to get an early night. Jeremy asks if she wants him to come too, but she just shakes her head and tells him she has a headache and just needs to rest. I know I shouldn't feel relief at that statement, but I can't help myself. I sit there for the rest of the night wondering what is going on in that head of hers right now.

***

We arrived back in L.A on the thirty first of May and it's now the third of June and our final show of the tour is tonight. I'm in my apartment feeling lonely and deep down missing Ava. It's so fucking quiet. I don't know what to do with myself. I catch up on some laundry and do some cleaning, not that the place is messy; I just need to keep myself busy so I'm not sitting around thinking of Ava. The last eight weeks have just been one huge rollercoaster of emotions and I just feel tired. I thought it might be different when I arrived home, but I was wrong. The last few days have been torture. I miss her already. Picking up my phone I sit down on the couch and stare at it. What the fuck am I doing? I need to back the fuck off, but I just can't. Locating her number in the contact list I send her a quick text.

Me:
Hey, whatcha doin?

Her reply is instant and makes me smile.

Ava:
Just doing some cleaning
.
What are you doing?

Me:
Nothing much. Kind of missing everyone already.

Ava:
Already? I was just thinking how nice it has been to finally have some time alone. Tori and Emma were great and I love them, but geez, Tori is a bit high maintenance.

Laughing to myself I reply with a grin.

Me
: Yeah, I know what you mean. Jeremy can be a bit like that at times.

Ava:
Yeah. Tell me about it! Listen, I'd better go. I need to put some finishing touches on my last article for the tour. Jennifer wants to go over it all with me tomorrow, so I need to get it done before the show tonight.

Me
: Okay, see you tonight.

Ava

Standing on the side of the stage I look out at the crowd and I am amazed by how full the arena is. The tickets sold out within the first two days of being on sale. Looking out over the sea of people they are shuffling around and talking excitedly. This last show is going to be amazing. I stroll back down to the dressing room open the door. There is some tension in the air and I'm not too sure if is nerves or disappointment that tonight is the final show.

"Hey, how are my rock stars doing?"

"Honestly I'm feeling a bit sad that it's all ending."

Walking over to Jeremy I place my hand on his shoulders "This is just the start Jer. This will be the first of many tours. Before you go out can I get one last picture of you all for the magazine?"

The boys all arrange themselves for the photo

"Girls you all need to be in this photo too."

Looking over at Brody I frown. "What do you mean?"

"You three girls are a part of this band as well."

Smiling at Brody, Emma, Tori and I go up and give him a big hug.

"Who's going to take it?"

Turning to Emma I smile "Selfie and timer."

Watching the band go on stage for the last time makes my stomach drop a bit. I don't know what's going to happen after tonight. I'm actually quite scared at the thought that this could be the last time we are all together, but if my relationship with Jeremy doesn't work out, that's a huge possibility.

Brody

The roar of the home crowd gives me goose bumps as we finish the first song of the set. I love standing on a stage and hearing the crowd go wild over our music. A lot of my heart and soul goes into the songs we play and it makes me feel good to know that people are connecting with and relating to our songs. People like Ava. The fact that she gets so emotional over my song writing and my lyrics just makes me love her even more. I feel like she understands me like no one ever has before. When I told her about my past and what happened to my brother she didn't look at me with pity, her beautiful golden eyes were full of compassion. Glancing to the side of the stage my eyes connect with hers and a smile lights up her whole face. Suddenly, I am oblivious to the heightened energy of the crowd as I watch her sway to the beat of the music and I struggle to drag my eyes from her throughout the entire show. I wonder what's going to happen with our friendship now that the tour is over. I need to find a way to make sure this girl is still in my life.

Before I know it the show's over and we are all heading backstage to one of the conference rooms for the end of tour after party. The tour has been a great success and there have been many people behind the scenes that have helped to make the ride smooth. Representatives from our record company, our publicist and manager were all present for the show and they are all sticking around for the after party, along with all of the roadies and crew and of course, some groupies. However, there is only one person I'm looking forward to spending time with tonight.

A couple of hours later, as I stand around listening to Luke, Hunter, Emma and Tori reminisce about the tour, my eyes find Ava's. She is standing beside Jeremy who is talking and laughing with Travis, our manager and looking bored out of her mind. Jeremy has definitely been making the most of the celebrations and is already on his way to being seriously plastered. Ava grins at me and I tilt my head toward the door signaling for her to follow me. She nods her head and turns and quietly says something to Jeremy before walking out of the room. A few seconds later as I make my toward the door, I turn to see Jeremy glaring at me from across the room. I realize he must have seen Ava leave through the same door, but at the moment I don't really care.

Closing the door behind me I see Ava leaning up against the opposite wall. She looks so beautiful tonight. Her black skinny jeans show off all of her curves and her low cut, chocolate brown, draped top is well fitted and displays just enough cleavage to be sexy but still classy and tasteful. Her hair falls in soft waves past her shoulders and I want to run my fingers through the beautiful dark waves. We stare at each other in silence for a few seconds as I slowly inch closer to her.

"Hey."

"Hey, yourself."

"You looked like you needed rescuing in there." Grinning at her I lean my shoulder up against the wall beside her and she turns to look at me.

"Oh. No, it was fine. Jeremy and Travis were talking business. I kind of zoned out for most of it."

"Did you enjoy the final show?"

Nodding, her smile widens and lights up her eyes as she stares up at me. "It was so cool. The crowd was wild and so into it. I swear you guys just keep getting better with every show. And there's no shortage of groupies in there tonight, so that just shows how popular you've all become."

Changing the subject I ask her how her tattoo is feeling.

"It's fine. It was a little sensitive for a few days, but it's all good now. Now that it's all healed up it looks heaps better." To prove her point she lifts her shirt and pulls her waistband down slightly for me to look at her tattoo. Bending down I catch a glimpse of the tattoo, but it's her soft golden skin that holds my attention. Reaching out I run my fingertips over the tattoo and hear her sharp intake of breath. Feeling my pulse thumping through my body I swallow my desire and look up into her eyes.

"It's beautiful."

Suddenly I hear an angry voice shout "What the fuck?"

Jeremy

Brody stands up straight as Ava lowers her top and they both just stare at me.

"What the fuck is going on?"

They glance at each other and then Ava steps toward me.

"I was just showing Brody how well my tattoo has healed."

Stepping past Ava I stop in front of Brody. His shoulders lift and he stares straight back at me.

"Look, I understand that you went with Ava when she got the tattoo, so obviously you saw more of her body than I would want you to see. But that doesn't mean you can ogle my girlfriend whenever you feel like it."

Brody stands up straighter and leans in toward me.

"I wasn't ogling her Jeremy."

Chuckling, I glance back at Ava to see her cross her arms and frown in my direction.

"Yeah? Why the fuck did you two sneak out here then?"

"We weren't sneaking. And maybe if you had been paying her a little more attention she wouldn't be out here with me."

Feeling my blood starting to boil I shake my head. I can't believe the fucking nerve of this guy.

"You've been sneaking around behind my back this whole fucking time, Brody. You're always there to save the fucking day and it's really starting to piss me off."

Brody looks past me and I glance behind me to see a bunch of people looking through the door, no doubt wondering what all the commotion is.

My attention snaps back to Brody as he softly says "Jeremy, you're drunk. You need to pull yourself together, bro."

He lifts his hand and places it on my shoulder but I push it away angrily. "Don't you call me ‘bro’. If you were my bro you wouldn't be in love with my fucking girl."

Brody's eyes look past me again and I turn to see Ava standing there with her mouth slightly open and her brows are raised in surprise.

Chuckling, I look at Ava in disbelief. "Don't pretend you didn't know, Dundee. It's so fucking obvious the way he's always watching you. And you two spend so much time together. Even Jo could see it."

I realize that I said the wrong thing as Ava closes her mouth and puts her hands on her hips.

"You talked to Jo about our relationship?"

"Yeah, I needed some advice."

"So you talk to the girl who is in love with you about our relationship?"

"Ava, she's my friend. And lately she seems to be the only friend that isn't going behind my back." I glare at Brody again.

"Tell me, Jeremy, what advice did she give you about
our
relationship?"

Shoving my hands in my pockets I shrug my shoulders. "Look, Dundee. I needed someone to talk to and I couldn't go to my best friend so she was the next option."

Ava shakes her head and looks at me with sad eyes. "You could have come to me, Jeremy. You could have talked to me. Or do you not consider me one of your friends? This is bullshit, Jeremy. If you don't trust me enough to talk to me, how is this relationship going to work?"

Fuck! Why the fuck did I bring Jo into this conversation? Stupid alcohol!

"Jeremy, I can't be with someone who doesn't trust me."

Is she fucking kidding me? What the fuck just happened? She turned it all back around on me.

"I can't deal with this shit." Shaking my head I storm off back into the conference room and head straight for the bar.

Ava

As I watch Jeremy walk away I can't believe he has been talking to Jo about our relationship. I would never go behind someone's back and cheat on them; I have more respect for myself than that. Turning around I walk as fast as my feet allow me. I need to get some fresh air. My breathing feels heavy and my chest is tightening. Hearing my name I start to run. Pushing on the door with so much force I almost fall through it I walk out into the cool night air and stare up at the stars. Why does everything good in my life always turn to shit? Breathing fast and shallow I try to calm down but I can't, my mind is scattered. Jeremy doesn't trust me. Of all the people for him to go to for advice, he goes to the girl who has been secretly in love with him for years. A gentle hand touches my shoulder and I turn around to see the face of the one person that seems to keep me calm.

"Ava?"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I couldn't Ava. You deserve better than me and he really likes you so I stepped back."

"I could have made that decision myself."

"I know but you don't deserve my baggage Ava my mind is fucked up. You don't deserve that. You deserve someone who is going to be there for you. Not someone who is too afraid to open their heart."

"You deserve that too Brody. You are a beautiful caring person and since we met, you are the only person who has always been there for me. You can't change what happened in your past, but you need to understand that it wasn't your fault and you need to move on with your life and be happy. Find someone who can make you happy."

Brody stares down into my eyes and inches closer to me. "I've already found her, Ava. But she doesn't belong to me." Looking up into his eyes I seem to lose sight of everything else. He leans down and kisses my forehead. My eyes close and his lips are so soft on my skin. After a few seconds he pulls back and I open my eyes.

"We better get back in there."

Walking beside Brody I'm so lost in my thoughts, I just focus on the sound of my heels clicking on the floor as I wonder what will happen when we get back inside.