Remember Jamie Baker (31 page)

He grinned. “I thought seeing a familiar face might do the trick.”

It did. The more I thought back to the last time I’d seen Natalia, the more I remembered. I hadn’t remembered Natalia until I saw her, but then my short trip to the Visticorp lab had come flooding back to me, and from there I was able to sort of work my way backward. I couldn’t remember everything. There were obvious gaps in my memory, but maybe those would come with time.

Natalia broke me from my reverie. “Are you here to rescue us?”

Instant mood crusher. The lights in the room flickered. Swallowing back a lump of emotion, I crouched down to her level and gave her a soft smile, hoping she wouldn’t sense how much her question had just broken my heart. “Do you need to be rescued?”

She opened her mouth to answer, but quickly shut it again. Her eyes flicked over my shoulder at Donovan before she stared at her lap and bit her lip.

Yes.
I jumped when the fierce voice spoke in my head. The sensation was startling, but not shocking and not wholly unexpected since I knew that Betty was telepathic.
She, more than any of us, needs to be rescued.

When I shot Donovan a suspicious glare, he hunched down beside me and smiled at Natalia. “Sweetheart.” He spoke softly, kindly, but his sincerity rang false like it had with me earlier. It didn’t help that Natalia flinched when he came close. If he touched her at all, I might just fry him to a crisp, my memory be damned. “Are things not better here than they were before?” he asked her. “Don’t you have your own lovely house now? And don’t you get to stay with your family all the time?”

He waved a hand toward Betty, as if she were her family. I wasn’t sure when Natalia had been captured, but maybe the other subjects were the only family she knew.

“Isn’t that much nicer?” he continued. “Haven’t I apologized for not understanding your feelings before? Don’t I take good care of you now?”

Still gnawing on her bottom lip, Natalia slowly lifted her eyes to Donovan. She was wary and confused, but when she finally nodded to him, there was truth in it.

He flashed her a wide, toothy smile, pleased with her answer because he saw as much as I did that he was breaking her down and earning her trust, however slowly. His manipulation of such a young, vulnerable child was disgusting. It made me want to punch him in the face.

She can’t stay here. He is slowly killing her.

I glanced at Betty again, wondering if she could read my thoughts or just speak to me. If I tried to talk back to her, would she hear me? Because that would be super handy.

I can hear you. It’s easier if you try to focus. Send me a direct message instead of just letting me pick through scattered thoughts.

Like this?

Betty gave me a subtle nod.

We have friends coming for us.

She was obviously a smart woman, because she didn’t react to my statement at all.

Donovan jolted us out of our conversation when he rose to his feet and clapped his hands together. “Well, Jamie, I have some things to attend to, but I will be back shortly with Dr. Chen. I’m sure he’ll have questions for you concerning your memory, and then we can discuss your place here and your duties. In the meantime, the kitchen is stocked and I’m sure you’d like time to rest and get to know Betty and Natalia, and maybe catch up with Teodoro.”

Both my heart and my stomach leapt at once as relief and anger warred inside me. “Teddy’s here?” Somehow I’d thought he would be in the other residence quarters, with the soldiers and the evil scientists, as opposed to being one of the captives.

Donovan waved toward the far end of the room, where a long couch faced a gigantic television mounted to a wall. Someone was playing a rather violent video game without the sound on. I couldn’t see anyone lying on the couch playing the game save a pair of feet hanging over the arm, but it didn’t matter. I knew that game, and I knew whose feet those were.

My relief vanished, and all that was left was the anger and hurt I’d felt since I learned of his betrayal. I tried to hold back my anger for the little girl’s sake, I really did, but seeing him made something in me snap. The power blitzed with my surge of anger, making the lights flicker and the television screen across the room click off.

“Oh, come on!” Teddy sat up with a groan and ripped a pair of giant headphones off his head. “It’s bad enough that they’ve taken my Internet access! Can’t they at least invest in a decent generator in this freaking place?”

“Teodoro, look who’s here,” Natalia called just as Donovan said, “You can’t blame me for not trusting you with Internet access, and I believe the power outage is of your own doing.”

Teddy frowned at Donovan, but that quickly changed the look into a sardonic smirk when he saw me. “Well, well, well, look who’s here.”

Teddy reeked of so much
bitterness I could practically taste it. “So you finally felt bad enough for getting me captured that you decided to stop by?”

So, so,
so
the wrong thing to say
. The last thread of my temper snapped, and I flipped into what Ryan called Danger Mode. “I got
you
captured? Excuse me? Who set the trap for whom? You’re the reason I went to Las Vegas. You’re the reason I have no memory!”

Donovan chuckled, though whether he was laughing at my barely contained rage or Teddy’s uh-oh-I’m-in-deep-crap expression, I couldn’t be sure. Maybe it was the situation in general that amused him. Jerk.

Teddy stumbled a few steps forward, holding up his hands as if to calm me. “Hold on, Jamie; I can explain.”

It was the first time he’d ever called me by my real name. For some reason, that hurt just as much as all the lies he’d told me. I stepped a safe distance from Natalia, because I couldn’t control the electricity roaring inside me. It rose to the surface of my skin, making my eyes start to glow and my hair whip about my head. “Explain why you betrayed me the first time? Or why you lied to me about everything? Or maybe you want to explain why you kept my true identity from me?”

“You would have gone to your family. You would have given yourself up, putting them and yourself in danger. I was
protecting
you. You know that, don’t you? You know I only ever wanted to help you.”

I was so angry. I wanted to bring a freaking lightning storm down on his stupid head. But there was something in his voice, something in the words he spoke, that I couldn’t argue with. Teddy
did
care about me, loved me, even.

“I was protecting you, Jamie. I was doing my best. I shouldn’t have lied to you about your identity. I know that now. I made a mistake, but I was only ever trying to keep you safe. I love you.”

My body sagged as my anger faded. I took a deep breath and sunk down into the nearest chair at the small table where Natalia had been coloring when I entered the room. I noticed the drawing she’d been working on, and my chest tightened. It was a picture of her family. I could easily recognize all of us. Abiodun and Betty were on the ends, Tyson and Natalia next to Betty, and Teddy and me beside Abiodun. She’d drawn Teddy and me holding hands, and there was a heart between us. It was cute and heartbreaking all at the same time. He must have been lying to Natalia and Betty, too.

“I know, Teddy.” I sighed heavily. “I know you didn’t mean to hurt me, but you did. You betrayed me.” I clenched my jaw against a sudden pain in my chest, and when I met his gaze, there were tears in my eyes. “You broke my heart.”

Teddy dropped to his knees in front of me. “Jamie,” he whispered as he took one of my hands in his.

I shook my head against the regret in his voice. “You lied to me, Teddy. About
everything
. I was vulnerable, and you took advantage of that, of
me
. I’m not sure I can forgive that. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to trust you again.”

Teddy swallowed. “Yes, you will. I’m sorry, Jamie. I love you so much. I know you know that. And I know you care about me, too. Don’t you?”

He waited for an answer, but it took me a while to give him one. Did I still care about him? I hadn’t thought so. I’d been so angry. I’d hated him. But looking into his deep brown eyes, feeling his hands holding mine, hearing him ask me if I cared about him, I couldn’t say no. My brain simply wouldn’t let me. “Yes, Teddy. I do care about you.”

He glanced up at Donovan, who hadn’t left as he’d said he needed to, then smiled softly at me. “Good. And do you think you can forgive me? Do you understand that I made a mistake, and that I feel sorry for hurting you?”

Again, I needed a long time to think about my answer. My emotions were all over the place, and my thoughts so scattered that I was getting a headache as I tried to figure out how I felt about him. Eventually, everything settled into one clear answer. “Yes,” I admitted, albeit with a hefty amount of defeat. “Yes, Teddy, I can forgive you. I know you’re sorry, and I know you won’t ever do something like that to me again. You care about me.”

“That’s right. I care about you. I
love
you, Jamie.”

I flinched, as if my brain had short-circuited for a brief second. There was something about his declaration that didn’t feel right.

“And you love me, too. Right?”

He prompted me to nod, and I followed his lead almost mindlessly. Of course I loved him. He was my family. I depended on him. Needed him. We were the same. “Of course, Teddy. I—” It was on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn’t say it. Why couldn’t I say it?

Teddy frowned, and after shooting another glance to Donovan, he looked down at my hands. Following his gaze, I realized I’d let go of him and was twisting a ring on my finger. An engagement ring. I sucked in a breath.

“Ryan.” The name fell from my lips like a feather in the wind. That was what was wrong with this moment. I didn’t love Teddy. Cared about him, yes, but I didn’t love him. I shook my head. “You’re my family, Teddy. But I love Ryan.”

Teddy’s entire countenance changed. His hands balled into fists, and he gave me that same hate-filled expression he’d given me when he told me to get out of his house. Ryan was apparently Teddy’s ugly trigger the same way he was Ryan’s. Forget Super Man and Lex Luthor; those guys had nothing on Teddy and Ryan. “Ryan?” he choked out. “You don’t even remember him, and you’re still choosing him over me?”

Derailed by his question, I asked one of my own. “What do you mean, I don’t remember him? Of course I remember him. I’ve got most of my memories back now.”

Teddy scoffed. “You got
most
of your memories back,” he said. “But not all.”

I really didn’t like the tone in his voice. Just what, exactly, was he getting at?

“Are you
sure
you remember your stupid boyfriend?”

I immediately threw myself into my memory. I started with my memory of saving the PACs at Visticorp. I could remember going to Las Vegas, remembered saving Carter. I remembered getting the phone call from Teddy, telling me that Carter was in trouble. But anything surrounding that call was a blank. I thought back to my month living in the desert safe house with Teddy. I remembered playing Chelsea’s Angel in order to pass the time. I remembered Donovan’s retrieval team showing up at my house and having to make a quick getaway. Remembered saying good-bye to my parents when I left. I remembered superkissing Teddy to escape the creeps at my dorm. I even remembered fighting Lorenz and breaking his knee. But where had Ryan been in all of that?

I knew from the stories Ryan told me that he’d been shot in that fight, but I couldn’t remember it. I’m sure we must have had a painful good-bye when I left with Teddy, but again, that memory wasn’t there. Ryan had proposed to me at the Grand Canyon the night of the Visticorp explosion, but now that I thought about it, I was still taking his word on that. I couldn’t remember it for myself.

Teddy’s glare turned into a downright evil smirk when I finally put the pieces together. “You didn’t!” But even as I told myself it was impossible, I knew it was the truth.

I backed away from Donovan, horrified. When I met his gaze, my eyes brimmed over with tears. “You gave me everything except my memories of Ryan?” My voice broke, and I sucked in a breath as I fought back a sob. “Why would you do that?”

Why I felt betrayed, I had no clue. How could I feel betrayed when I’d not trusted him in the first place? I’d known there would be a catch somehow, but
this?
This wasn’t strategic; it was cruel.

Donovan, surprisingly, let out a wary sigh and sat down in the chair across from mine. He looked genuinely regretful as he said, “I didn’t want to. I want you to trust me, Jamie. I want you to see that I’m not a monster.”

“Then how could you be so cruel? Don’t give me all my memories, fine; I can understand you needing leverage in our bargain, but why keep the one thing I love more than anything from me? Why take that from me?”

Tears began to spill from my eyes.

“He didn’t have a choice,” Teddy said. My control on my powers slipped at hearing the self-satisfaction in his voice. He leaned against the back of the couch, arms and ankles crossed in front of him. There was as much cruelty in his face as there had been in his voice. “After you fried my nanobots the first time, he needed me to make a new batch that could withstand your energy.”

“
Your
nanobots?” I gasped.

“Of course they’re mine.” Teddy scoffed, insulted by my surprise. “Who else in the world could create something so sophisticated? It’s impossible technology. For anyone except me. I agreed to work for Donovan years ago in order to gain access to his computer systems. It was a small price to pay to be able to plan my escape with Blake. And Donovan can’t recreate them himself, though he’s spent the last few years trying.”

Teddy’s sardonic smile shot to Donovan, making the older man’s face flush red. Donovan didn’t lose his composure often. It must have driven him mad that Teddy, his
test
subject
that was barely even human in his eyes, was smarter than his entire staff. That he was at Teddy’s mercy.

“So you got caught, dragged here to be a
prisoner
again, and when I beat your stupid technology and Donovan asked for a new model, you struck a deal with him—new nanobots for my memories of Ryan?”

It was despicable. On so many levels. My disgust, my hatred for the boy I’d considered my family for the last six months, oozed out of me so strongly that Teddy cracked. “You
left
me!” he shouted. “I gave you
everything
, and you walked out on me!”

I jumped to my feet. The lights in the room flickered again. “You told me to leave! I never hurt you on purpose. I tried to love you, Teddy. I drove myself crazy with guilt that I couldn’t return your feelings for me. And you let me beat myself up over it. You let me believe that I’d once loved you when you knew all along that it was Ryan I loved! You’re
sick!
”

“Forget Ryan!” Teddy used his mind to throw the couch he’d been resting against across the room. It crashed into the television mounted on the wall, sending glass flying in all directions. “He is
nothing
. A stupid
jock!
You’re too good for him, Jamie! Too powerful. You belong with
me!
”

Oh. No. He. Didn’t. “You egomaniacal little creep! You’re the one who doesn’t deserve
me
. Ryan is so much more than a jock. He’s smart, and selfless, and passionate. He’s optimistic and kind—all things you aren’t.” I scoffed. “He’s a
man
. You’re just a selfish, immature
child
who throws tantrums when things don’t go your way. You don’t have the slightest clue what real love is. I wasn’t with Ryan for thirty seconds before I learned the difference between love and whatever it is you think you feel for me.”

I knew I shouldn’t stoke the flames of his temper, but again,
temperamental
was near the top of my personality list for a reason. It was one of my strongest attributes. A flaw it may be, but one that was a big part of me. I was angry now, and I wanted to hurt him back.

He’d nearly broken me, and I wanted him to feel what that was like, so I held up my ring finger, letting him get a good look at the diamond resting there. “I let Ryan put this back on my finger before I came here. I promised him I would marry him. He was able to do in less than a week what you’ll
never
be able to accomplish. He made me fall for him.”

Teddy’s face flushed so red he almost looked purple, and things started flying around the room again. A few dishes broke and books exploded from the shelves, slamming into walls.

“Teodoro!” Betty yelled, grabbing Natalia into her arms, protecting the child from the flying objects.

Donovan tried, too. “Teodoro, calm down or I will be forced to separate you from the rest of them. Do you want me to have to lock you up in the observation cell?”

Teddy ignored the threat, eyes focused solely on me. I refused to look away and drove the nail in as hard as I could. “I love him, Teddy. I love him more than anything. With or without my memories. You will never win.”

I knew instantly that I’d pushed him too far. The room stilled and Teddy suddenly went scarily calm. “Is that what you think?”

The surety in his voice was disturbing. Recognizing that he was a bomb seconds away from exploding, I kept my voice low and soft as I answered him. “You can’t make me love you.”

His eyes narrowed and he shook his head. “I can make you do anything I want.”

My stomach rolled, and I glanced toward Betty, wondering if she had any clue what he was talking about. She seemed as clueless as me. And scared. When I looked back at him, he smiled cruelly. “Kiss me, Jamie.”

“What?”

I scoffed, but even as I thought he was out of his mind, I walked over to him and pressed my lips to his.

Gasping, I tried to scramble back, but Teddy smirked and said, “I don’t think so. Kiss me again. A real kiss. With passion. Kiss me like you would kiss your precious Ryan.”

When I leaned in, my eyes snapped wide. “NO!”

I tried to fight the command, but my arms went around his neck and I pressed my mouth to his. I kissed him. I kissed him long and hard. His hands wrapped around my waist and he pulled me against him, answering my kiss with zeal. He acted as if I were kissing him for real, acting of my own volition. I hated it, but I let him do it. I couldn’t stop myself. He deepened the kiss and I wanted to vomit, but I allowed him to explore my mouth and even tangled my tongue with his. I let his hands drift over my body, and I raked my fingers through his hair, pulling him even closer to me.

He had complete control of me. He’d given me a command, and I was unable to deny him. I started to shake from both fear and rage. I tried to fight the compulsion, but no matter what I did I was forced to follow his lead. Forced to let him use my body as he pleased.