Renegade (25 page)

“You’re okay with this?”

“You know it.” And he did know it. Robert would support him, just as he had supported Robert when they were younger. So he nodded, satisfied.

Mac was getting a little antsy, wondering if Becks was waiting up for him.
Hoping
she’d be waiting up for him. Wondering if she’d be wearing that robe again…

“You know what’s going to happen, don’t you?” Robert pinned Mac with a serious expression.

“When we quit?”

“When you show up at Baird’s Cove.”

Mac pretended not to understand, and Robert sighed. “When you show up at Baird’s Cove
with Becks
. After travelin’ with her on the
Polaris
. After telling everyone that you’re courtin’ her and then pretending to be engaged.” Mac took a deep breath, but Robert’s expression didn’t change. “You know what Holt’s going to do, don’t you?”

Slowly, Mac nodded. “Yeah. I do.”

He did. And for the first time in his life, he was okay with the idea.

Robert returned the nod. “All right then. Go on, find your ‘intended’.”

He did. Becks hadn’t locked her door, but when he pushed it opened, he found her room dark. She was curled up in the middle of her bed, hugging a pillow. He wished he could see her face.

He stood there for a while, staring down at her, wondering what the future would be like with her in his life. Knowing that it would be an adventure.

Finally, he unbuttoned his shirt and climbed in beside her. He’d left his pants on, since she was wearing a nightgown of some sort, but that didn’t stop him from curling around her. He pulled her closer, and she murmured in her sleep, pushing her rear end against him. He gritted his teeth and tried not to remember how good she tasted covered in salt water and sunshine.

Apparently his cock wasn’t completely satisfied yet.

It was another hour before he fell asleep, and he spent the time thinking about marriage.

Because over the last few days he’d realized that marriage wasn’t the death knell he’d always assumed. Marriage didn’t mean he’d lose his freedom; it meant he’d have someone to share it with. Her words this afternoon—it’d only been this afternoon?—about finding someplace to love had been true. He could love Beckett. He could be happy here, with her.

And if his brother reacted the way Mac suspected he would, he’d have the chance to find out.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Crying herself to sleep last night had been stupid, but Becks hadn’t seemed to be able to help herself. Maybe she was nearing her monthly, or maybe she was just more exhausted than she’d guessed. But after that beautiful day and that disastrous dinner and that staggering announcement, she was just drained.

The thought of pretending to marry Mac was just… cruel. She knew he’d never
really
marry her—he’d made his feelings on marriage perfectly clear—so this scheme was even harder to bear. To let her imagine what life would be like with him, seeing that smile every day, experiencing so many adventures together… and to know that it couldn’t ever happen…? Yes, that was just cruel.

So she’d cried herself to sleep, and now woke before the sun to a heavy warmth pressed against her back and a hand beneath her breasts.

He’d slept with her.

Yesterday—had it been only yesterday?—she’d woken disappointed to find that he’d left, and determined to seduce him to her bed again. It’d worked, and he’d done nothing…ungentlemanly. Which was funny, because Mac Baird was definitely
not
a gentleman.

Smiling, she slowly rolled over, careful not to jar him awake. She wanted to watch him.

She’d never seen a man sleeping. Some apparently snored or drooled, according to Pearl’s books, but not Mac. His features slack in sleep, he looked… completely unconcerned with the monumental mess he’d made of her emotions and home. And she couldn’t help but brush one set of fingertips across his perfect cheek, marveling at how much she could still love him despite the changes he’d forced on—

Shit
.

She was thinking it again; thinking the L-word.

She couldn’t love him. People don’t fall in love with one another after only a few days. It was probably just the way he made her—her body—feel that made her think the word
love
.

She did not love him
.

And then he opened those warm copper eyes and smiled sexily at her, and she began to doubt herself.

“Good morning, beautiful.” His voice was raspy and thick, like he was still half-asleep, and she loved the little shivers it sent down her skin.

But his words made her frown slightly, and he reached up to trace the corners of her lips.
God,
he felt so good. “What’s this? Not in a good mood?”

“I’m not beautiful. Pearl is.”

He smiled, slow and sexy and
what was wrong with her
? Was she just going to be attracted to every damn thing the man did? “You’re wrong, honey. Your sister’s beautiful, but you’re…” That fingertip curved up her cheek, and she closed her eyes on another shiver. “You’re wild and free and untamed. And you
know
I think
that’s
beautiful.”

She couldn’t help herself. She sighed and sort of melted against him, and that’s when he kissed her. It was… well, she still hadn’t quite forgiven him for the way he’d dragged her into this mess with Creel last night, but apparently her body was willing to let bygones be bygones. His arm tightened around her middle, and she pressed against him, and she felt the proof of
his
attraction pressing against her thigh. She made a little noise in the back of her throat and rubbed against him, delighting in the warmth that sprang between her legs when he stroked her tongue with his.

With a growl, he became the aggressor, pushing her backwards on her pillows until he was suspended over her, kissing and fondling, and Becks began to wiggle her nightgown up past her knees, almost trembling in anticipation.

But then he pulled away with a little groan and dropped his forehead to hers. His stiffness was pushing against the cotton-covered warm, wet spot. She wanted him, and her thighs seemed to spread on their own accord. “Becks, honey…” He groaned, and she smiled slightly, to hear how far she could undo him. “I think it’s fairly obvious how badly I want you.” He took a deep shuddering breath. “But we’ll never make the tide if I do everything I want to do to you.”

She liked the sound of that, and her wiggle made him wince. But he just sighed, and rolled off of her, pulling her upright with one hand. “I’ll meet you down at the landing twenty minutes after dawn.”

She sighed slightly, remembering their ruse and the adventure she was about to go on. But then he surprised her again when he dropped a quick kiss to her lips. Pulling away, he smiled wickedly. “And I
swear
I’ll make up for this morning.” She raised a brow in question, and he kissed her again. “Making love in a hammock is like nothing you can imagine.”

And then he was gone, leaving her to scramble to throw some clothing in a valise. The eastern sky was already lightening, so she’d have to hurry if she wanted to grab some breakfast before they set sail. If Pearl was still asleep, she’d have to forgo saying goodbye to her sister, but it wouldn’t be for long. She was going on a ship, on a real voyage! It was only a day to Charleston, but they’d always gone by wagon before, and she was suddenly excited about the adventure.

But while getting dressed, she couldn’t make her mind focus on what she’d need… she kept cycling back to his promise.

A hammock
?

She was like a kid on Christmas morning, and Mac couldn’t stop smiling at her antics. Becks scampered up the rope ladder Ironto lowered for her, and then perched up by the bow to oversee everything. She watched them use the dinghy to pull the ship out of the creek into the Edisto River—he caught her eying the beach where they’d spent yesterday afternoon and hoped she was remembering their time pleasantly—and then raise the sails on their way out to the Sound. It wasn’t until the initial burst of activity was over, and Ironto was perched capably at Robert’s usual place at the rudder, that Mac joined her to watch the sun climbing the eastern sky.

Her excitement was contagious, and he pulled her close enough to feel her heart beating against his chest. It felt so… so
right
to have her here, on his ship. On his home. He’d spent the last few days learning to love
her
home, and he wanted her to love the
Polaris
. “You have no idea how happy I am to have you here.”

“Really?” Her grin was impish. “Are you going to put me to work? Do you need an extra set of hands to pull on some ropes or whatever it is you do?”

“I’m sure I could think of something better for your hands to do…” He ran his palms up her sides and was gratified when she giggled and snuggled closer to him.

They stood in silence for a minute, watching the sun climbing in the sky off the bow, and reveling in the power of a ship under full sail. Or at least, he was. She was apparently still thinking about being put to work.

Clearing her throat, she said, “I noticed you’re down a man. Where’s Robert?”

He hid his wince, because he’d been expecting the question. Honestly, he was just glad she’d waited so long to ask it. Robert had rowed out to the
Polaris
last night to tell the others to make ready to weigh anchor in the morning, but had returned to Beckett right before Mac and Becks had left. He was going to load up the barrels and leave with Eugenia and Pearl after breakfast.

But Mac didn’t want to tell Becks and ruin this incredible mood. She’d find out soon enough, and she’d likely be angry he hadn’t mentioned her mother’s plans… but he wasn’t willing to make her angry
now
. So he didn’t quite lie when he said, “He decided to stay with your sister for a few days.”

Her blonde brows rose at that, and he resisted the temptation to kiss them both. “With Pearl? On
purpose
?” and Mac knew that she was thinking on the possibilities of her sister and Robert together. Yep, that was distracting, all right.

He gave in to his urge and dropped a kiss to her forehead. “I told him we’d be fine without him. You’re here to help, after all.”

That impish smile reappeared, and he wondered if she could look any prettier than she did right now, her blue eyes matching the cloudless sky above him, the sun bringing out the freckles across her cheeks, and the wind playing with those long strands of hair that had pulled from her braid.

He should’ve been paying more attention, because she suddenly pulled away from him and darted towards the main mast. “In that case,” she called over her shoulder to him, “you won’t mind if I practice climbing the rigging, will you?”

He laughed, chasing after her, and spent the next hour trying to keep her from losing her grip on the ropes. She sure was adventurous, but had the sense of balance of a drunken monkey. Of course, once he made the mistake of mentioning that to her, she decided she just
had
to climb most of the way up the mast. Mac was glad that he’d insisted she tie a line around her waist, because when she fell—and of course, she fell—he was able to lower her to the deck without issue.

His hands were shaking as he climbed down—Jeff was looking a little sickly, too—but Becks was laughing delightedly with Ironto, and that pretty much set the mood for the rest of the voyage. She was like a hurricane, sweeping through their order and habits, insisting everything be explained and examined. She wanted to know what every little line and cleat was for, what every tool did, what every nook and cranny held. And Mac couldn’t have been happier. She belonged here, with him. Making his heart light.

It was a gorgeous day for a sail, and they made wonderful time. He pointed out Wadmalaw and Johns Island in the afternoon, and they all passed the time by looking for landmarks she’d recognize. They pulled into the Harbor with a few hours of daylight left, and anchored near James Island, past the lighthouse at the ruins of Ft. Sumpter.

Ironto impressed Becks with his ability to cook a full meal in the schooner’s tiny galley, and Mac swore he saw the older man blush under his olive skin. They had a good time ribbing him about it, either way. After dinner, they stretched out on the deck to watch the stars come out, and listen to each other’s stories. Jeff kept them laughing all evening, and Ironto’s stories about his adventurous journeys were always just a little too fantastic to be believed.

Mac liked hearing about Becks the most, though. She seemed awe-struck by their adventures, but when he pressed her for hers, she had to admit that she hadn’t spent her life lazing around either. Sure, she might’ve spent all her time at Beckett, but she’d had enough escapades and experienced enough of life to make her a fun storyteller too. Why, the three men were all a rapt audience when she told them about stumbling across that alligator in the inland swamp and in tears from laughter when she described the time she’d done her best to learn to hunt wild turkey with a sling.

Yeah, she was a match for him, all right. He knew it, and he hoped she knew it, too.

And apparently, Ironto recognized it as well. After the last light had faded from the western sky—the lights of Charleston and the gently bobbing lanterns from other boats looked like stars themselves—he cleared his throat loudly and turned to Jeff. “Come, puppy. We go below to find our bunks.”

Jeff shrugged. “Not all of us get tired so easily, grandpa. I’ll take first watch.”

Mac hid his grin when Ironto glared significantly at the younger man. “Being tired is irrelevant. You are needed below.”