Replace Me (17 page)

That moment brought so much into perspective for me.

My mind went to Lacey and what I could have had with her. I imagined her getting the sonogram while I held her hand, knowing they were my children. Realizing that she wasn’t mine set a new plan into affect. I wanted this life with Lacey and I was going to do whatever it took to get her back.

I had something that Joey didn’t.

I still had her heart.

Lacey

Joey had taken me to new heights, surprising me each time the two of us came together. He touched me like I was fragile and precious, not like he’d shown me how he touched other women. While in the shower, I closed my eyes and thought of the countless times he’d given me pleasure already. My skin vibrated as I brushed the washcloth over my tender pussy. It had been throbbing since our last encounter, hours ago. Joey was like a sex machine, and he never gave up until I was ready to pass out.

I let the rag drop and touched my bare fingers to my clit, moving them around in a circular motion. I lathered up my tits with my free hand and watched myself pinching my left nipple. I leaned back against the wall and moved my hand faster, pressing hard as my fingers teased my eager clit. Soon, my legs were buckling and I was silently crying out in bliss.

I stepped out after finally rinsing off, gently drying my still trembling body. Joey was on the couch, in only a pair of boxers. He smiled when I walked in, wrapped in only a towel. “I think we should do somethin’ today.”

I climbed on top of him, looking him right in those light hazel-brown eyes. “We are doing something.”

He patted on my legs after accepting a short kiss. “I meant go out. Let me take you out to dinner, on a real date.”

I was shocked, after hearing so many horror stories about Joey not doing anything but screwing random women. “You really want to take me out?”

He rubbed my arms and smiled. “Yes. Why are you sayin’ it like that?”

I shrugged and smiled awkwardly. I don’t know. Everyone says you don’t ever do that. I just can’t understand why you feel like doing it with me. You’ve already gotten me in bed, several times. Aren’t I breaking every one of your rules?”

He tugged down the towel and massaged my tits while he looked at them. “Rules are made to be broken, especially when they’re with someone like you, Lacey. You made me fuckin’ crazy when you wouldn’t talk to me. I’ve never had to chase pussy before. Not ever.”

Our lips met and I teased him with my tongue. “So, was I worth the chase?”

He cocked his eyebrow, while pinching my nipple and biting down on his lip. “I can’t get enough of you. Does that answer your question?”

I should have been satisfied, but for some reason, I wasn’t. Joey was amazing and also mysterious. There was so much I didn’t know about him. “It answers that one, but you still haven’t said what you want from me. Is this just sex? Are we friends with casual benefits? Forgive me for being blunt, I just need to know what I’m getting myself into. After Shayne, I can’t be in the dark about anything.”

Joey pulled me close, cuddling with me on the couch. He grabbed the remote that he still kept behind his head instead of an end table, and turned the volume down. “I reckon you deserve answers then. Lacey, I’m not real sure what this is between us. I’m not the kind of guy that goes lookin’ for women. I have understandin’s and nobody complains. You’re not like them. I get that you want some kind of label, because that’s all you’ve ever known. I’m just not sure I can make promises without breakin’ them. Do you understand?”

I really didn’t. “You say I’m different, but not different enough to just want to see me?”

“Don’t put words in my mouth. I never said that. I’ve never had to answer to a woman. My life’s been too busy to settle down. Things have changed and perhaps bein’ with you could turn into somethin’ more. It feels right, but I don’t know how long it will last, so I don’t want to lie about it. It’s all new. I might just wake up one day and decide I need to be single. Do you understand?”

I was annoyed, but for some reason, I did understand. “I appreciate that you’re being honest about it. Most guys would tell me what I wanted to hear to shut me up.”

He brushed the hair away from my face. “I’m not most guys.”

“No, you’re not.” I smiled and tried to think about being happy where we were at. It had only been a few times that we’d been together. Obviously, it was too soon for anyone to put labels on it, but I felt weary, like everything could change in an instant. The more I fell for Joey, the scarier it was going to be to allow myself feelings that would in turn break my heart again.

After we laid there talking for a while, I reached over and grabbed my phone. I needed to put some clothes on, or at least hang up the towel and walk around naked. It was damp and getting on the sofa fabric. Joey watched me as I looked at it. “I can’t believe that I haven’t gotten any phone calls today. I figured Sky would be blowing it up.”

Joey laughed. “It didn’t ring while you were in the shower.” I turned to look at him and he was staring at the television when he spoke. Deciding that it was a good time to change, I hurried into the bedroom to do so.

Like every time I’d gotten a shower here, Joey had set out a t-shirt of his for me to put on. The shirt he’d picked out had a lapel on it that would have scratched my chest, so I went into his dresser to find another one.

I did find a plain one, but that wasn’t all that was in his drawer. Over a dozen photos of naked girls, laying sprawled out on beds were in a pile. I glanced at them quickly and then put them back where they were. When Joey came in and saw the shirt, I could tell he knew that I knew. He sat down on the bed and patted the spot beside him. I was reluctant, but made my way there. Our eyes locked and he shot me a smile. “Ask away.”

How was I supposed to approach this without seeming jealous or disturbed when frankly, I was both. “There’s like a dozen different women in those pictures, Joey.”

He pointed to the dresser. “Go get them.” I couldn’t help but notice that he seemed unaffected, like it wasn’t a big deal at all.

I walked over and grabbed the pictures, then placed them in the palm of his waiting hand. “I wasn’t snooping. I just wanted a more comfortable shirt, I swear.”

He took the pictures and spread them out on his bed. Then he pointed to one. “Her name is Courtney. I met her in culinary school, first. We were teamed up to work on a project. Her boyfriend was also in the program and she loved him enough to sabotage our team, for his to do better.”

I wasn’t following. “I don’t understand how this naked picture has to do with culinary school.”

He smiled. “It’s simple. One night we had a few drinks. Getting her to come back to my room was easier than I expected. Once I got her naked, I took the picture. The next morning she woke up and begged me not to tell anyone. I waited a week before I showed her the picture and told her if she ever crossed me again, I had leverage against her.”

“You’re ruthless.”

“I was determined to make my dream come true. No little two-timing bitch was going to fuck it up.”

I pointed to the others. “What about these?”

He pointed to two others. “For two months I worked in Baltimore. The first week there I met these two crazy chicks that just wanted to have fun. Tawny and Sheena were their names. Those two I took for fun. Then I decided that I wanted a collection, so every woman that I hooked up with I took a picture. You may think I’m an asshole. Some people write in journals. I kept photos to remember them by.”

I grabbed all of the photos and put them back in his drawer, still not sure how I felt about them.

“They’re yours to keep. Thank you for being honest.”

“You think I take them out and look at them?”

“I don’t want to know.”

“Your picture ain’t goin’ in that drawer, Lace. Don’t even worry about it.”

“I wasn’t.” I felt hurt. Like I wasn’t good enough to be something he reminisced about. “Am I not good enough to be in your collection?”

He grabbed my hands and pulled me between his legs. “You’re different. I want you here, because I like being with you. Your picture belongs on nightstands and wallets, not hidden in drawers.”

I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him on the lips. “I really shouldn’t like you this much.”

He laughed and kissed me again. “I warned you.”

“You did.”

“I’m not the guy that everyone says I am, Lacey. I get that I did things that some people would frown upon, but I knew what I wanted and I went for it. Every woman that I’ve been with has understood that I couldn’t give them anything other than a good time.”

“Stop explaining. I don’t even care.” To an extent, I didn’t care. Joey made all of my problems disappear. With every kiss and every touch I was consumed by pleasure, leaving me needing more.

He said I was different. Whether that was a crock of shit, or really the truth, it was enough to make me come back. It was time for me to live in the day, instead of reaching for forever when it was too hard to grasp.

“I don’t want you to leave.”

I climbed on top of him, pinning him to the bed while holding on to his hands. Joey didn’t fight me. “If you want me to stay, then you need to lose the shorts. I want you naked.”

He flipped us around and ran his hands up my t-shirt. “That goes for you, too. Take off this shirt and show me that pussy.”

He sat up and I lifted the shirt to my abdomen, revealing my naked sex. Joey licked his lips and ran his hand over my smooth naked pussy. “I’m going to lick this pussy until you explode.”

I gasped and watched him scooting down.

It was going to be another long night.

Chapter 17

Shayne

Twins.

She was having fucking twins and I’d told my whole family they were mine.

I didn’t sleep much that next night, or the one after it. It didn’t help that I could hear Ashley crying her eyes out constantly. What kind of support would I be to her if I walked away now?

I woke the next morning with a pounding headache. I’d reach my limit of stress and I was about to explode. My emotions were through the roof and I hated myself for being such an idiot.

In the back of my mind, I continued to remind myself that I was doing this for my brother; that his future was worth protecting.

Still, hearing those heartbeats did something to me. They reiterated that these were two innocent children. I had to protect them.

Ash was going through her own set of emotions. She was crying constantly and comforting her was uncomfortable, since we weren’t really that close. It was necessary for us to make peace and move forward, if not for ourselves and the fact that we were living together, but for the sake of the unborn children that I’d committed to help raise, temporary or not.

I found Ashley in a ball on the couch. She had some movie playing, but her head was down against her knees. When I sat down beside her, she looked up with eyes full of tears. She sniffled through her words. “I’m fine.”

I put my arm around her. “You’re not fine, Ash. I get it. I know you’re scared.”

“It’s not just that. After hearing them, those heartbeats inside of me, it hit me. They’re little lives growing inside of me and I’ve been so awful. I don’t deserve to be a mother, Ford was right. How am I going to give them a good life?”

“Don’t say that.” I kept comforting her, rubbing her back for support. “Ash, you may not have expected to get pregnant that night, and yes it changed your life, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be a better person. Sure, you went a little crazy when it came to gettin’ Ford back, but you were desperate.”

“Don’t be nice to me about Joey, Shayne. I know you helped him get back with Lacey.”

“I’m not denyin’ it. They belong together, as weird as it sounds. I’m not meanin’ to be a prick and hurt your feelin’s, but it’s true. Ford loves Sky and she loves him back. Think about how broken he’s been since Harley died. Can you imagine how hard it was for him to feel again? She brought him back to life, and whether you want to believe it or not, it’s the truth.”

She got quiet and put her face down against her knees again. I pulled my hand away from her back and just sat there. She spoke without looking at me. “It hurts so much. I can’t stop lovin’ him. We were supposed to grow old together.”

I sighed and thought back when we were younger and had our whole lives ahead of us, not that we still didn’t, but the game plans had changed before our eyes. “You’re not alone, Ash. I’m not Ford and I know we’re not a couple, but I’m not goin’ to walk away.”

She finally sat back up and leaned her head against me. “Do you hate me?”

I brushed her hair away from my face, since it was itching. “No. I may not agree with things you’ve done, though.”

“I’m so scared.”

“Ash, regardless whether me or my brother claim these children as ours, it won’t matter. They’re a part of my family and my parents will love them. We all will. That’s what family does. We have each other’s backs. That’s also why Ford’s so pissed at me. He thinks I had your back and not his. It doesn’t matter if everything worked out. He’ll never trust me again.”

“Don’t remind me of the reasons we shouldn’t be friends. You must resent me, at least.”

“I get it. Right now, I’d love to beat the shit out of Joey, so I get it. I can see how jealousy makes people say and do crazy things.” I felt stupid talking to Ash about Lacey. Since she was Sky’s friend, she couldn’t let herself be amicable towards her. Lacey was just as much the enemy as Sky.

I don’t think Ash would have been rude if Lacey came over, but she certainly wouldn’t want to become her personal friend. Her heart ached for my cousin and I wondered if she’d ever be able to get past it.

Since I’d never been in love before, not the kind where I felt like I couldn’t live without that person, I couldn’t fully understand why she was holding on. All I could hope was that one-day I’d feel that way about someone. I thought, in time, I could feel that way for Lacey and be the man that she wanted me to be. The truth was, I didn’t know if I could. Still, getting her away from Joey was my main goal. I didn’t care how or when, but I knew I wanted it to happen. He didn’t deserve her affections and neither did I.