Requiem (65 page)

'We don't want
no trouble, lady. Just be on your way. Take your words somewhere
else.'

'You don't
understand,' she pleaded.

The gun was
still firmly aimed at her. 'I understand enough,' he said.

Rumours spread
quickly. The small clusters of ragged looking people would run,
hide, and cower as Seline and Belameir approached.

'Two of the
Warlord's servants, helpers, slaves, whatever, we don't want that
bitch and her friend coming near us. Look at her eyes, that same
dull eyed, hopeless expression as the others. Look at the scars.
Self inflicted would be my guess. Sure. That's part of their ritual
process or somethin'. Shit! She's coming this way. Grab Lucy and
get behind that wall. Hand me the rifle. I'll aim it at her just to
scare her off. Don't want no trouble if I can avoid it.'

'I heard
there's Yurrick out there too.'

'Yeah, that's
what Jerry said. They'll be with her for sure. Probly jus
recruitin' people.'

'Recruitin 'em
for what?'

'Killin'. What
else? Wait. Shhh. She's close now. She's seen the gun. Good. She's
backing away. Good.'

'Ain't no place
for you here, bitch. Go on up the road. We know who you work for.
We know what you want. Ain't no place for you here.'

'She's tryna
say somethin'.'

'Don't wanna
hear ya preachin'. Get up the road 'for I blast a hole in yur
belly.'

'What she
doin'?'

'She stubborn.
She ain't movin' just yet.'

She turns and
walks up the road. Her feet look heavy. Her eyes look heavy. He
places the rifle against the wall.

'These goddamn
butchers. Drift through the streets with the wind. Pick off the
weak ones. The sick ones. Mercy they say. Angels of death they say.
They creep up behind ya when you're elbow deep in some trash pile
or rubble lookin' for food or, if you're lucky 'nuf not to be
hungry, just lookin' for something to pass the time. They got guns.
Actual, workin' guns. Where they get them? God knows. But they find
you and they judge you and they kill you and that's the last thing
you hear – their judgement – but it's different for ever'one.'

'How you
know?'

'I heard 'em
and seen 'em.'

'Where they get
their guns?'

'God knows.
Maybe raided some from NeoCorp.'

He checks the
food store. The rusted metal box beneath the floorboard.

'How much we
got?'

''Nuf for
another day or two. We'll go to market tomorra. Use up the last
that coin we found.'

'Then
what?'

'We go
searchin' again.'

'I don't think
Lucy can do much more searchin'. Her legs are thinner than ever.
Her belly's swollen up just like she's pregnant.'

Her eyes are
shut. There's a fly buzzing by her. It lands on her cheek and
crawls to her chin before being shooed away.

'We'll think
'bout it when the time comes. Ain't much use stayin' 'round here
though. There's nothin' left. Most folk've moved on. Further into
the city. We'll be doin' that too once we got the strength. Ain't
nothin' for it.'

The sun was low
in the sky, it shone upon her face and directly into her eyes. Her
lenses had tinted beneath the glare but she still raised her hand
to block the light. She walked with her head tilted down. Her skin
was a dark shade of pink. Her hands were sweating from the tight
fists they had been bundled into.

All of Sinn
seemed emptied of life. The road she walked was wide – four lanes –
lined either side by empty parking lots and multi-story buildings.
A mountain of charred heap of scrap metal and rubbish blocked the
road. Seline stepped onto the footpath and walked around, eyeing
the pile of rubbish, smouldering and stinking in the heat.

She walked down
the centre of the road, listening to the soft patting of her feet
against the faded strip of white paint on the tarmac. Belameir was
far behind. He was talking to someone but he wouldn't have any
luck.

What are you
even doing here?

'I don't know,'
Seline said to herself.

You think
you're some kind of saviour?

'I don't
know.'

Are you so
pretentious that you fabricate your own guilt to make it look like
you care?

'I don't
know.'

Do you even
care about these people? Why should you?

She'd stopped
walking. 'I don't know! I'm fucking confused, alright?! What am I
supposed to do? You tell me because I don't have a goddamn
clue.'

No
response.

'That's what I
thought.'

A gust of wind
swept past. She stopped. Her brain was aching, baking inside her
skull. She walked a little further to where the shadow from a wall
was cast onto the pavement. She sat down on the curb beneath the
shade and dropped her bag next to her. She pulled a bottle of water
from the bag and drank almost half of it. She poured some over her
head and let it run over her chest and down her back. She sat
huddled with her knees up and head resting on her forearms.

She'd joined
the ranks of the messiahs. The pariahs. She wondered; maybe they
were right – the messiahs. Maybe they knew something that she
didn't. How many of them had been successful? In the long term.
None. But then again... no. They just knew what it was to be
ignored. That's where the similarities ended.

There was a
scratching noise coming from further down the road. She looked out
the corner of her eye. A single figure was approaching through the
waves of heat.

She eyed the
stranger as he crossed her path. He was at least six feet tall.
Naked. Bald. Showered in sweat. There was a matting of scars across
the tanned flesh of his chest and stomach. The tattoo the scars now
covered was a mess of intelligible blank ink like a Rorschach
test.

Their eyes met.
The man stopped about two metres away, watching Seline carefully.
He might have been about twice Seline's age but it was hard to
tell. His front teeth were missing and a thick scar ran over his
scalp.

'What brand do
you smoke?' he asked.

'I don't,' said
Seline.

He raised his
hand, offering her a cigarette. 'You don't what?'

'I don't
smoke.'

He slowly
retracted the tattered carton.

'Are you
serious? What do you have a death wish or somethin'?'

'I don't like
the taste.'

'Nobody does!
But it's medicine so you take it anyways. Ain't nobody taught you
that lesson, missy?'

She shrugged
and looked off down the road. 'I guess not.'

'Even the
youngens know you gotta smoke. Yer a bad influence on 'em. You
probably think yer cool or somethin' don't you? Well you won't be
when you get cancer or leprosy, I'll tell you that for free.'

He walked off
muttering something else about cigarettes and only known cures.
Seline watched him until he disappeared behind a screen of
buildings.

She found
herself walking familiar streets. She could hear Belameir tracking
behind her, the dirt crunching beneath his feet. There was an itch
all through her body, just below the surface. She wanted to peel
off her skin, shed it like a snake, leave it behind to melt and
burn in the heat.

Seline
encountered a small band of children that splintered silently,
running from her as she approached. Others watched her cautiously,
their hands just out of view either ready to shoot or ready to
pretend to just so the stranger with the Warlord's scars wouldn't
come too close.

She walked down
the middle of the four lane road until she found what she was
looking for. Words smeared in red upon the concrete wall that ran
along the roadside. They were much clearer than she remembered. She
turned down the corner, off the Sick Heart River into an unnamed
street. She could see the spire of the church. There was still the
distant sound of gunfire and the choking screech of a motorbike
only a few blocks away. She walked towards the church, keeping her
eyes from the naked, sun scorched bodies littering the old
footpaths.

The church was
empty. The candles had been burned into melted strata atop the
altar. She was looking at the broken spire when she noticed, out of
the corner of her eye, a small girl appear from the thin alley that
ran down the side of the church. She was sitting with her arms
wrapped around knees, hiding her face from the light. Seline stood
for a moment looking at her. She realised she was crying. She
pulled her head up and looked at Seline. Seline walked towards her,
half expecting her to run, half expecting her to attack. Scraps of
paper and plastic rustled with the gentle wind that funnelled down
the alley. The girl buried her head in her arms again.

Seline stopped
about one pace away and knelt down. The girl had dark black hair,
lightly speckled with dandruff.

'What do you
want?' the little girl sneered. There were no tears on her
face.

'I just want to
help. Are you alright?'

'Got any
food?'

Seline reached
into her pocket. Took out a half eaten bar and handed it to the
girl.

'I got some!'
she yelled as she turned and ran back down the alley.

Seline stood up
and followed her. The alley continued all the way down the back of
the church to a dead end. A group of about five other children sat
huddled in a circle throwing small pebbles into a crudely drawn
circle on the pavement. Dirtied crates and makeshift bedding were
strewn out beneath a shredded tarpaulin that had been propped up
with sticks and rocks. The game was forgotten as the kids all
rushed towards the girl, shouting and cheering in triumph.

Seline walked
towards the group.

'Get out!' one
of the kids yelled. 'No adults allowed!'

Seline took
another step. 'I can get you more food if you want. A bath? Better
shelter maybe?'

The eldest boy
stepped up. 'Didn't you hear him, lady? He said no fuckin' adults,
now get lost.'

'You kids need
help. You need to get out of here.'

'
You
need to get out of here.'

The girl Seline
had given the food to picked up one of the rocks the other kids had
been playing with. She threw it at Seline but it fell short. Seline
stepped back. Another kid tossed a rock at her. Seline looked down
at it bouncing towards her feet. When she looked back up all the
kids had rocks and pebbles in their hands.

'Get out!' the
eldest boy yelled.

Seline took a
step back as if to leave but stopped herself. The rocks pelted the
pavement and back wall of the church.

'I can help
you!' Seline said over the cluttering noise and the jeering,
high-pitched squeals of the children.

'Get out,
bitch!'

'No one wants
you here!'

'You're not
welcome!'

A stone struck
her just above her eye. She could feel the warmth of the blood
trickling down her face. She stepped forward but the eldest kid
brandished a small knife.

'If you don't
leave this place you'll die. You have to believe me,' Seline
said.

'Don't threaten
us, lady.'

'It's not a
threat it's the truth.'

'Take another
step. I dare you.'

Seline stood
still for a moment. She didn't know how to break through. How to
make them feel what she felt, to see what she could see. She
noticed droplets of her own blood on the ground by her feet. She
turned and walked out of the alley back towards the street. Their
small voices continued to insult her from their pitiful citadel.
She looked over her shoulder to make sure they hadn't followed
her.

Coward
.

The boy had
been following the woman and the man almost since they first
arrived. They'd been struggling to get people's attention for some
reason but everyone ignored or threatened them. And yet the woman
with the metal arm and the man with the black, scruffy hair
continued to try to convince them of something; talking to them and
showing them. The boy could see the desperation, especially in the
woman's face. He witnessed it grow and cycle through frustration,
anger, and sorrow but had yet to venture close enough to hear her
quiet words.

Now she was
walking away from the church. The scruffy man was further back,
talking to an old man. That old man was deaf so he wouldn't get
very far. Donny looked at the woman. She was close now. Her face
was dirty. A trickle of blood stained the left side of her face.
She looked so tired but to him, she was the most beautiful thing
he'd ever seen. He walked behind her on the footpath while she
dragged her feet down the centre of the road. Her footsteps were
heavy. He had a sudden urge to help her but couldn't think of what
he should say. Something nice. A compliment.

He blurted the
words out without thinking.

'You remind me
of an angel.'

Seline stopped,
looked behind. Donny stood there, a few metres away, looking up at
her. Sooty, dirt coated hair, sticking to his forehead. He was
terribly thin with large, round, blue eyes.

'I'm sorry?'
said Seline.

He was still a
bit nervous and fiddling with his hands. 'I said that you remind me
of an angel. The one in my dream.'

Seline smiled
weakly, shaking her head slightly. 'I'm not an angel but thank
you.'

She turned and
continued walking down the road.

'A- are you
lonely?' he asked, following her.

'I don't know.
I guess you could say that.'

'Is that why
you look so sad?'

'No... well not
really.'

'What are you
doing?'

'Right now I'm
just walking.'

'Where are you
going?'

'I don't
know.'

'How come you
were talking to those people?'

'Which people
do you mean?'

'All of
them.'