Return (Lady of Toryn trilogy) (26 page)

"Ashlyn, come on out. I know that water's freezing by now." He hesitated. "The others are on their way. I…I told them what happened."

Oh, great. Way to go,
Skye, shout it to the masses
and
bring the rest of FLD to Toryn when they weren't even entirely sure of Kou's- Devlyn's- intentions. Ashlyn threw the remaining scrap of sanding stone down and wrapped her arms around herself, sinking nearly to her chin in crimson-tinged water. Maybe Skye would go away if she maintained her silence.

Another knock.
"Ashlyn, come on."

Maybe not.

Ashlyn took a deep breath before submerging herself entirely. She squeezed her eyes shut as the cold rushed up to meet her, every sound intensified, her entire world enveloped in an icy prison.

If she could just stay underwater and stare at the backs of her eyelids all day, maybe she could find a way to regain some frigging trust in the human race again. Or she could drown while she was thinking about it. Either option was more appealing than talking to
Skye right now.

Even with her eyes closed,
Ashlyn could feel them stinging. It wasn't from the soap she knew was lingering in the water- she felt like crying again, except that there was nothing left in her to cry. She was just a hollow shell, some sick, shriveled replica of a human. Her limbs were heavy, her eyes dry and scratchy, and she doubted there would be relief anytime soon.

She laid there, arms folded across her chest, feeling the water tickling air bubbles at the end of her nose, her drifting hair eventually settling across her arms and stomach like a shield from the world above. It would be so easy just to stay here, breathe like she was breathing air instead of water, let
herself go…

Let everything go…

Could she?

She remembered
Vargo, the expression on his face just before he had kissed her. His electric eyes alert, focused completely on her, his lips curving slightly as he leaned closer. Ashlyn recalled the way her heartbeat had quickened, even though he had been going exactly with her plan- even though she'd known that he would be kissing her and had steeled herself against it.

Then she remembered that she'd puked afterwards.

Reluctantly, she opened her eyes, exhaling slowly and watching the different hues of red shift above her. It was quiet, surreal- and quite like an old painting that she'd seen in the Eastern City mansion, flashes of crimson overlapped by jagged shards of burgundy, every color some variation of red, each one slightly different from the next, the darkest shades almost black. Ashlyn had been fascinated by the painting the moment she'd laid eyes on it, and often wondered if it was still there.

Now she was seeing the painting in her bathwater, which really did not bode well for her mental state.

Ashlyn sat up, slicking her hair back from her face and shivering as the cool air hit her skin. Even if the water hadn't been cold, she would have felt the chill. Autumn was slowly turning its back on the island, and winter seasons in Toryn were amazingly unpleasant, even for someone who had grown up there.

She rested her forehead against the side of the metal tub, miserably staring at nothing at all. Her whole body hurt, ached, far worse than the agony in her ruined ankle, and it wasn't like muscle pains- no, those she could handle. This pain was like her life force had been sucked from her with an inhuman strength, leaving her helpless, hollow and withering where she stood…or where she lay.
Whatever.

She took a deep breath, steeling herself against the emotion that racked her thou
ghts. This wasn't the way of a ninja. Self-pity was destructive in any situation, and this was no exception.

Another knock sounded at the door, and
Ashlyn groaned. "Skye," she yelled, and her voice must have bounced off the water because it seemed to echo back at her much louder, "can't you take a hint? Buzz off!"

"It's not
Skye, it's Tag," came the reply. "And I'm afraid you'll have to cut your bath short, Lady Li. Toryn is under attack."

Ashlyn
sprang out of the tub and scrambled into her kimono. "Under attack?" she demanded, flinging open the door as she belted the sash around her waist.

Tag stood there with his hand up as if he were just about to knock on the door again. He was human now, mercifully bearing no resemblance to the flesh-eating monster who had tried to attack
Ashlyn in her basement such a short time before.

Awkward much?
Ashlyn thought, a knee-jerk reaction because you just couldn't watch somebody shape-shift into a monster and then treat them perfectly normally afterwards.

(Unless, of course, that somebody was
Drake Lockhart.)

This wasn't
Drake. This was her brother.

In a heartbeat, all the pain and heaviness that
Ashlyn had been fighting for the past several hours came rushing back to hit her full-force. She almost staggered,
physically
staggered under the weight of her emotional burden. Tag's face, his eyes, so similar to her own and to her father's, danced before her like a mockery of all that she'd ever held dear.

This was her brother.
Her
brother
. Something deep inside of her told Ashlyn that this was a good thing, the knowledge that she wasn't alone, that someone could share the pressures of being the child of Lord Li. But instead the knowledge turned into a series of sharp edges, cutting her heart to pieces and telling her, over and over again,
You are impure. Elder Heir no longer. You are disgraced.

Ashlyn
blinked and shook her head. Now was not the time.

Behind Tag stood
Restlyn and Vargo, looking very out-of-place among the sparse furnishings in Ashlyn's house. Ashlyn noted briefly that Restlyn had pulled her hair back into a loose ponytail, combing her over-styled bangs out and looking a little more like herself again instead of a bad Jenn clone.

Vargo
, on the other hand, was making no secret of the fact that he was enjoying the not-so-modest way the kimono clung to Ashlyn's wet skin.

Scowling,
Ashlyn folded her arms across her chest, stupidly attempting to maintain some modicum of dignity while water dripped down her chin. "Under attack by whom?" she asked Tag stiffly.

Tag shifted his weight nervously from one foot to the other. "I
…do not know, my Lady. Kou will be able to tell you more. He requested that you meet him at the gates."

Ashlyn
opened her mouth to reply, but Restlyn rushed forward suddenly. "What happened?" she exclaimed, falling to her knees in front of Ashlyn.

"What are you-"
Ashlyn broke off in a yelp and slapped her hands against the doorjamb to keep herself from falling as the dark-haired martial artist grabbed Ashlyn's left foot and yanked it forward. She swallowed hard when she saw her blood-streaked ankle and the gaping wound that had replaced her tattoo.

"
Ashlyn, this is down to the bone," Restlyn said, tucking an errant lock of hair behind her ear as she turned concerned eyes upward. "We need to have a doctor look at it or you could develop a serious infection."

"Not something we have time for right now,"
Vargo said. He stepped forward and stared down at the open wound, holding his cigarette up by his face as if shielding himself from the faint light that was streaming in through the open door. "That's a hell of a nasty scrape. What happened?"

For the first time in her life,
Ashlyn Li was truly at a loss for words. She bit her lip, rifling frantically for an excuse. "I…um…" She glanced up at Tag, who stared back at her with his jaw set.

She could see in his eyes that he knew. Any
Toryn would remember the clan traditions- it didn't take a genius to see what she had done. Ashlyn lifted her chin, unblinking, silently daring the younger ninja to defy her.

"Do you wish me
to send a healer, Lady Li?" he asked at length. His voice was low, emotionless.

"Yes,"
Restlyn said.

"
No
," Ashlyn snapped, irritated. "I'll have plenty of time to see a healer later. For now I need to find Kou."

"At the gates," Tag repeated, stepping aside for her to pass (as if she would actually walk outside in a wet
kimono
, of all things) and nodding towards the door.

"I'll meet him there as soon as I'm dressed,"
Ashlyn retorted. She gave Vargo and Tag an aggravated look and walked past them, pretending not to notice that she was leaving wet footprints across her wood floors. Thankfully, the two men took the not-so-subtle hint and left her house, sliding the door shut behind them.

Ashlyn
pawed through the contents of her drawers, wrinkling her nose at the musty smell that clung to her clothes. "I don't know what I expected," she said out loud, speaking as much to herself as to Restlyn. "You leave your wardrobe in a box for eight years and it's bound to smell a little rank."

"What happened to your ankle?"
Restlyn asked.

Her hands clenched over a handful of underwear.
"Nothing."

"Don't lie to me. You took off your clan tattoo. Why?
"

Ashlyn
glanced over at Restlyn, surprised at the venom in the other girl's voice, and saw that the dark-haired martial artist was leaning against the doorway to the bathroom. Beyond that sat the metal tub, which still held the blood-stained water Ashlyn had bathed in.

It was a bit incriminating, to say the least, and
Restlyn did not look happy.

Ashlyn
cleared her throat and resumed her search for decent clothing. It was unlikely that anything would still fit her after all these years, but she had nothing else.

"There are five
Toryn bloodlines that are still considered pure," she said, holding up a white tank top that had always been oversized for her. "Marriages, couplings and births have been carefully recorded for hundreds of years. Monitored. Supervised. The Li is- was- one of those bloodlines, and each Li heir, including my father, has been tattooed with the sign of our house. On the left ankle."

Restlyn's eyes narrowed. “You’re not telling me anything I don’t already know.
"

"I'm sure
Skye's told you. Tag and Kou are my brothers by blood," Ashlyn said, yanking out a pair of black shorts. She bunched the clothes together, only a little uncomfortable at having Restlyn watch her. "The line is no longer pure. The tattoo holds no significance except for the disgrace of my family."

"So you removed the tattoo, and with it all reminders of your father's indiscretions."
Restlyn's face was sad, sympathetic. Ashlyn hated how understanding she could be.

"Nothing could make me forget," she said, hobbling back into the bathroom and putting a hand on the doork
nob, "but I haven't been Li for a long time, anyway. This changes nothing, except for the shame my father has brought to his people."

"They're your people, too,"
Restlyn said gently, "And mine. Whether we want to admit it or not."

"I need to change,"
Ashlyn said. "Toryn
is
under attack, you know."

Restlyn
sighed and stepped aside so Ashlyn could close the door. "I'll bandage your ankle before we leave," she said. "You don't want to get any mud in that gash before the healer looks at it."

Ashlyn
quickly peeled off the wet kimono and hung it on the back of the door, hoping it would air-dry before she needed it again, and reluctantly pulled on the clothes she'd dug up. Everything was, of course, much too small, the bindings cutting unattractively across her breasts, her shorts stretched tight over her hips. She finger-combed her hair into a messy lump at the back of her head, picked up her shoes and pulled open the door again.

"Sit,"
Restlyn said, pointing at a mat in the corner. Ashlyn sat, and the dark-haired girl made quick work of a makeshift bandage over the wounded ankle, securing it tightly in place before Ashlyn pulled her sneakers on.

They slid the door shut behind them, and
Ashlyn made her way towards the front gates, noting immediately that there were no sounds of battle, no clashing of swords or hissing of magic. The rain had not let up, however, and she knew from experience that the noise of war could be lost even in a faint drizzle.

As she strode across the grass,
Restlyn beside her, Ashlyn couldn't help but notice that Toryn warriors were everywhere- against the walls, patrolling the bridges. Most of them were clustered together around Kou, who was standing on top of a large boulder, speaking. His words were indistinguishable from the surrounding noise. Ashlyn stopped in front of him and caught his gaze, feeling every eye in the city turn on her when Kou stepped down and came towards her.

She swallowed the words that sprang to her tongue when she saw Kou, forced her hatred into a manageable position at the back of her mind.
Toryn came first. Personal vendettas could be settled later.