Return of the Last McKenna (Harlequin Romance) (16 page)

She buried her face in her hands. Her shoulders shook with her
tears, and Brody got to his feet, wrapped an arm around Kate and drew her to
him. She tensed, then finally leaned against him. She cried for a long time,
Brody doing nothing more than holding her and running a hand down her back and
whispering the same thing over and over again.
I’m
sorry.

He could have said it a thousand times and never felt like it
was enough. Finally, her tears eased, and so too did the stiffness in her body,
the tension in her features. She drew back, the dark green lakes of her eyes
still brimming. “Don’t you understand, Brody?” she said. “My brother did say
goodbye to me and did tell me he loved me. He did it through you.”

Perhaps. But had Brody done all he could have to ensure
Andrew’s final message had been delivered? “The only thing I could do afterwards
was fulfill his last wishes. It wasn’t enough, but it was all I had, and for a
friend like Andrew, I couldn’t let him down again. I wasn’t a very good
messenger. I should have…” he threw up his hands, “done more.”

“Sometimes you do all you can and you accept that it’s enough.
You said something like that to me just the other day. Remember?”

He could hear the band playing inside, music celebrating a new
beginning, a new life, while outside in the alley, he and Kate were discussing a
loss and trying like hell to move forward with their own lives.

“I’m a doctor,” he said. “I’m supposed to heal people. It’s in
the Hippocratic Oath, for God’s sake. Do no harm. And I did harm by treating him
in the middle of nowhere, in a place that didn’t have everything I needed. I did
him harm by not giving him the time to say goodbye.” He cursed and shook his
head. “I did my best, and I fell short. Maybe I’m not the doctor I thought I
was.”

“Let me ask you something.” She laid a hand on his. “What would
have happened to my brother if you hadn’t been there? If he’d been alone and
that bomb went off?”

“He’d have suffered. It would have been long and slow, and
painful.” A horrible, undeserved end for a hero like Andrew.

“And you eased that pain, didn’t you?” Kate asked.

“Yes. We had plenty of painkillers.”

“I meant you eased that pain by talking to him. By making him
forget what was happening. He didn’t suffer because he had you. A friend, when
he needed one most.” She held Brody’s hand tight in her own, her touch a
soothing balm for his tortured thoughts. “Thank you for being with him. Thank
you for taking care of him. Thank you for making it easier for him.”

The words came from Kate’s heart. She didn’t blame him. She’d
absolved him. “He cared about you deeply. I wish I could have brought him home
to you.”

Tears spilled from her eyes. “I do, too.”

His entire goal for the last few weeks had been to help her
move forward, to help her go after her dreams, and even if she never spoke to
him again after today, he wanted to know she was at least driving down that path
and he had done what Andrew asked of him. Then he could take satisfaction in
that. He told himself it would be enough. “You have to move forward, Kate. Rent
that building. Expand the business. The one thing Andrew wanted more than
anything was for you to be happy. For you to go after your dreams. We stood in
that shop in Weymouth and I could see in your eyes that you wanted to take that
chance, but in the end, you walked away. You’ve stood still for weeks, Kate,
instead of taking the leap.”

“I wasn’t the risk taker. That was Andrew. And without him—”
She shook her head. “I can’t do it. Nora’s Sweet Shop is doing just fine where
it is. I don’t need to expand.”

“Because you’re afraid of failure.”

“I’m done.” She turned away. “I didn’t come here for you to
tell me what I’m doing wrong with my life.”

“You’re just going to run away? Because the conversation got
tough?”

“I’m not doing that, Brody.” She pressed a finger into his
chest. “You are. Quit telling me how to change my life until you have the
courage to change your own.” She crossed to the door and jerked it open.

She was about to leave, and he knew, as well as he knew his own
name, that he would never see her again if he let her go now. He had done what
he always did—protect, worry, dispense advice and medicine—and had been too
afraid to do the same for himself.

Doctor, heal thyself,
she’d
joked.

How true that was.

If he didn’t change now, he’d lose everything that mattered.
Brody was tired of losing what was important to him. Not one more day, not one
more minute, would he live afraid of the risks ahead. Afraid of loss. Afraid of
being out of control.

“Kate, wait.” He let out a gust. She lingered at the door, half
here, half gone. “We’re two of a kind, aren’t we? Both in fields that require us
to take a chance every day, and both of us too scared to do that. You would
think I wouldn’t be, because I’ve seen risk and loss firsthand, felt it under my
hands, heard it in the slowing beep of a heart rate. But I am. I’m scared as
hell to lose a patient. And scared as hell to lose you.”

“Me? Why?”

“Because you’re the first woman I’ve ever met who has shown me
my faults and dared me to face them. You’re right about me. About my need to fix
everything. I think it’s part of why I do the medical missions. It wasn’t enough
to change lives here. I needed to do it in other towns, other countries. And I
thought I was doing just fine.” Now the words that he had always kept to
himself, the tight leash he had held on his emotions, uncoiled, and the
sentences spilled out in a fast waterfall. “Until I went to Afghanistan. There,
I was stuck in the middle of nowhere with a dying man and a roomful of wounded.
Not enough time, not enough supplies, not enough medicine in the world to save
everyone. Medicine couldn’t save him, and all I could do was watch him die.”
Brody ran a hand over his face. “I have been scared, all this time, of not
having control over the situation. Of exactly what happened with your brother.”
He took in Kate’s delicate features, her wide green eyes. In the past few weeks,
she had changed him in dozens of ways, by encouraging him to step out his normal
world. He wanted more of that. More of her. And that meant changing, right this
second. “I’m done being afraid of risk, Kate. It’s kept me from doing what truly
makes me happy.”

“Like what?”

“Like expanding the medical missions to be bigger, to take on
new challenges. Like doing more to change the lives of the people here in
Newton. And most of all,” he paused, “like falling in love.”

“Falling in love? You have?”

“A long time ago.” As he said the words, he realized they were
true. “I think I fell in love with you before I even met you.”

She shook her head. “That’s impossible. How could you do
that?”

“Andrew and I talked about you all the time. Whenever we were
between towns, or between shifts, we talked. He told me all about the shop and
your grandmother, and you.” Brody grinned. “He made you sound like Mother
Theresa and Santa Claus, all rolled into one.”

And finally, Kate laughed and Brody saw a bit of her fire
return. “I’m not that nice or that altruistic.”

“He thought you were. And the more he talked, the more I saw
you through his eyes. I saw you in the care packages you sent. In the notes you
wrote. In the memories he shared. And I thought, damn, what would it be like to
have someone love me that much?” He took her hands in his and held tight. “It
took me over a month to work up the courage to walk into your shop. I would walk
down there every day during my lunch break, and after I got done for the day,
and every time I would turn around. Partly because I was dreading telling you
who I was and why I was there, and partly because I was afraid I’d meet you and
you wouldn’t be what I imagined.”

“I wouldn’t live up to the hype?”

He smiled. “Something like that. But then I met you, and you
were all Andrew said, and more. You were kind and funny and smart and beautiful.
Very beautiful.” He closed the gap between them and took both her hands in his.
“More than I deserved. More than I ever hoped.”

“Brody—”

“You knocked me off my feet so badly that first day, I didn’t
even realize I picked out a sports basket for my grandmother, who is as far from
a sports fan as you can get. All I knew was that I wanted to talk to you, wanted
to get to know you. And…” He let out a breath, and faced the last bit of truth.
That for all these years, he had held back from love, protecting his own heart,
because of one failure. Which had cost him true happiness. No more. “I want more
of that, Kate. I want you. In my life now and for always.”

She shook her head and broke away from him. “Brody, I can’t do
this right now. I’m supposed to be at the wedding, and so are you, and—”

He reached for her again, this time cupping her face with his
hands. “Take a risk with me, Kate.”

Her eyes grew wide, and her cheeks flushed. “I…I can’t.” She
shook her head. “You need to quit believing in the impossible, Brody McKenna,
and look at the facts. We’re not meant to be together. We started out on a lie,
and you can’t build anything from that. Nothing except goodbye.”

Then she headed back inside. The door slammed shut with a loud
bang that echoed in the alley for a long, long time.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

T
HE
ruined cupcakes
sat on the
counter, mocking Kate. Distracted and out of sorts, she’d burned two batches
this morning. She’d thought coming in on a Sunday would allow her to get caught
up, but it had only put her further behind. When Joanne had come in to help,
Kate almost burst into tears with relief. “I hate to abandon you on your first
day back,” she said to Joanne, “but I really need to get some air. I think I’ll
go for a run.”

“Go, go. I’ll be fine. Besides, your grandmother is due to stop
by for her daily sugar fix. She’ll keep me company.”

Kate tossed her apron to the side and headed out to the front
of the store. Just as she did, Nora entered, making a beeline for the cupcake
display. She placed a small box on the counter beside her, then lifted the glass
dome. “Good morning, granddaughter.”

“Good morning.” She pressed a kiss to Nora’s cheek. “How are
you?”

“Just fine, just fine, or I will be when I get my daily
cupcake.” Nora’s hand hovered over the red devil, then the peanut butter banana,
then the chocolate cherry. “Off to see the cute doctor?”

“No. I’m just heading out for a run.”

“Well, before you go, maybe you should open this package. I
found it on the doorstep when I came in.” Nora settled on the chocolate cherry,
and replaced the glass dome. She leaned against the counter, peeled off the
paper wrapping and took a bite. “Amazing. As always.”

“That package is for me?” Kate grabbed a box cutter from under
the counter. Maybe she’d ordered something for the shop and forgotten. She
slipped the knife under the tape, and as she peeled it off, she realized the box
had no stamp, no delivery confirmation tag. And it was Sunday, a day no service
delivered. “You just found it out front?”

“Yup.” Nora took another bite, and smiled. “Delicious.
Sometimes the best and sweetest one is the one you missed, in your rush to make
a choice. Don’t you think?”

Kate peeled up one flap, then the other. She reached into the
cardboard container and pulled out a small black velvet box. A card had been
attached to the top, and she opened that first.

Sometimes all you need is a little luck
before you leap.

—Brody

“What do you have there?” Nora asked.

“I don’t know.” Kate pried open the hinged lid of the box, and
let out a gasp when she saw the contents. A four leaf clover, a real one,
encased in a glass dome, and attached to a heart shaped charm, dangling from a
wide silver ring. A keychain, waiting for keys.

“That man knows you well,” Nora said.

“He does. But—”

Nora laid a hand on Kate’s shoulder, cutting off her words.
“Before you go spouting off all the reasons why you shouldn’t love him, let me
ask you something. Did I ever tell you the story of who named the shop?”

Kate nodded. “Yeah, but tell it again. It’s my favorite.”

A soft smile stole across Nora’s face as she talked. “When we
were first married, your grandfather knew how much I wanted to open a little
shop like this, but I was young and had a child on the way and a husband going
off to war, and the whole idea just scared the pants off me. The day he left, I
woke up and found a spatula on my pillow. Tied up with a bow. He’d carved Nora’s
Sweet Shop into the handle. Did it by hand, with a pocketknife I gave him for
his birthday. He told me the sweetest thing I could ever do for him was to go
after my dreams. And I did. I never regretted it, not for a second. I’ve been so
proud to see you and Andrew take up the reins and carry that dream forward.”
Nora put a hand on Kate’s. “Now it’s your turn to run with the ball and carry it
the rest of the way. To take Nora’s to new heights.”

“I’m scared, Grandma.” Kate ran her hands over the silver ring.
“What if I fail?”

“Just by having the courage to go after your dreams, you’ve
already won, my dear.” She drew her granddaughter into a long, tight hug. “And
no matter what, I’ll be here to support you.”

Kate fingered the charm, then lifted her gaze to the newspaper
article on the wall. Andrew seemed to be smiling his support from across the
room. He would want her to do this. To move forward, and as Brody had said, quit
standing still. “Thanks, Grandma.”

“You’re welcome. Now go for that run, and clear your head. I’ll
stay here and,” she lifted the glass dome and snagged a peanut butter banana
cupcake this time, “guard the cupcakes.”

Kate laughed. She slipped the keychain into her pocket then
headed out the door. A few minutes later, she had stopped at her townhouse,
changed her clothes, and started toward the reservoir. The Sunday morning
sunshine warmed her, and she found herself slipping into the rhythm and peace of
running.

Her mind drifted to Brody and she found herself looking for
him, hoping to see him running, too. The keychain bounced in her pocket, a
reminder of his gift. A little luck to encourage her to take a risk.

A risk like opening a second location?

A risk like…

Opening her heart?

She rounded the bend of the reservoir, startling a flock of
pigeons. They burst into flight, with a chatter of wings. The contingent of
pigeons circled away, opting for greener pastures, while several settled back
onto the ground in Kate’s wake. She watched the ones in flight, their squat
bodies becoming sleek gray missiles against the sunny fall sky.

Her steps slowed. She glanced to her right, and saw two paths.
One that led toward home. One that led another direction. The opposite from the
one she’d always taken. Kate drew in a breath and started running again.

* * *

The smell of braised beef filled the kitchen of Mary
McKenna’s Newton house. Finn, Ellie and Jiao stood in the sunroom and talked
with Mary, while Brody hung back in the library and pretended to look for a book
he had no intention of reading.

His attempt to show Kate he cared, that he supported her, had
gone bust. He’d dropped off the package early this morning, tempted to deliver
it in person, but not sure what kind of reception he’d get. After the way things
had ended yesterday, he wasn’t sure she ever wanted to see him again. Still, he
couldn’t get her out of his mind, no matter how hard he tried.

“Come join us, Brody,” Ellie said to her brother-in-law. “Your
grandmother’s about to open a bottle of that ’92 Merlot you like.” She rubbed a
hand over her stomach. “Though I’m sticking to apple juice for a while.”

Brody waved off the offer. “I’m not in a wine mood tonight.
I’ll be out shortly.”

Ellie sighed and leaned against the doorjamb. “You McKenna men
are all the same.” A soft smile stole across her face. “Stubborn, determined and
impossible.”

“Hey. How’s that supposed to make me feel better?”

“It’s not.” Ellie pushed off from the door and crossed to Finn.
Her pregnancy had just started to show, giving her a tiny bit of a curve to her
belly. “Those are the qualities I love the most in Finn. He’s like a bulldog,
only cuter.”

Brody laughed. “I don’t know about the cute part.”

“I heard what you did.” Ellie paused before him. She took the
book in his hands away and shoved it back on the bookshelf. “Both in Afghanistan
and with Kate. I think you did the right thing.”

He shook his head. “I lost her in the end. How is that the
right thing?”

“You were doing what all three of you do. Protecting her.
Taking care of her. She’ll realize that and come around.”

“I hope so.”

“She will.” Ellie laid a hand on Brody’s arm, the loving
support of a sister-in-law who had already become an indelible part of the
McKenna family tree. “And it’ll all work out. A wise man once told me that the
smart man lets the woman he loves go, so that when she returns, it’ll be because
she truly loves him.” She poked a finger at his chest. “That smart man was you.
That day in the coffee shop, remember?”

“I do.” He and Riley had dragged Finn down there and surprised
him with Ellie, all in hopes of spurring the two to work it out. Which, clearly,
they had. “Thank you, Ellie.”

“You’re welcome.”

“You’re a smart woman,” Brody said.

She laughed. “Well, be sure to tell Finn that.”

“I think he already knows.”

Ellie smiled, the same private smile that Brody had seen on
Riley, Stace and Finn. The smile of someone deeply in love and happy as
hell.

She gave his arm a gentle tug. “Come on, Brody, have a glass of
wine with your family and have a little faith that it will all be okay.”

He headed out of the library and into the hall with Ellie. “You
do know I’m a doctor, right? Faith is a hard commodity to come by in a world of
tests and logic.”

“I know. But you’re also an Irishman and if anyone trusts in
luck and faith, it should be you.” She gave him a grin, then stepped away and
waved toward the front door.

Brody turned. Kate stood in the doorway, wearing a T-shirt,
shorts and running shoes. A fine sheen of sweat glistened on her skin. To Brody,
she’d never looked more beautiful or desirable. He caught his breath.

“I’m sorry for just showing up, but…” she bit her lip and gave
him a tentative version of a smile, “does that offer for a family dinner still
stand?”

Joy burst in his heart and he closed the distance between them
in a few short strides. “Yes, every Sunday. Two on the dot,” he said, then let
out a gust. “Oh, God, Kate, I wasn’t sure I’d see you again.”

“I got the package.” She reached in her pocket and held up the
keychain. It tick-tocked back and forth on her finger. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

She turned it over in her palm, and dropped her gaze to the
small green leaves. “When I got it, my first instinct was to do what I’ve always
done. To run from the risk and the fear. And I literally did just that.”

“I can tell.” He grinned. “But you still look sexy, even after
a run.”

“I thought running would help me forget,” she said, “but all I
did was look for you. At every turn, at every stop. I didn’t want to run around
the reservoir. I wanted to run to you, Brody. And so…”

“You did.” If happiness were a meter, Brody’s would shoot off
the charts. “I’m glad.”

“You were right. I was scared. When I was a kid, I was the one
who had to be the steady rudder for Andrew. And he worried about me. The two of
us, taking care of each other. Our parents fought all the time and it was
just…chaos. I didn’t want my little brother to worry or get scared, so I became
the practical, dependable one. I let him dream big, and I kept my feet firmly on
the ground. Then when he died, it shook me badly. So I did what I do best, and
kept those feet cemented in place. I thought if I did everything the same, no
surprises, no risks, I wouldn’t have to experience that kind of loss or pain
again. But I was wrong. Because in the end, it cost me you.”

“I’m still here, Kate.” He brushed a tendril of hair off her
forehead. “And I always will be.”

“When you told me you’d fallen in love with me, all I could see
was this big cliff and you standing beside it, asking me to jump with you. I got
scared and I ran, instead of doing what I should have done.”

“Which was…?”

She smiled and winnowed the gap between them, lifted her arms
to wrap around his neck and raised on her tiptoes. She pressed a kiss to his
lips, then drew back. “That.”

“Much better than walking away.” He tightened his hold on her,
then kissed her back. God, he loved this woman. Loved her smile. Loved her
smarts. Loved everything about her. “Much, much better.”

“I got scared, because I fell in love with you, too. I found a
hundred reasons not to be with you, because I couldn’t believe that a man like
you really existed. One who could light fireworks inside me and at the same time
understand my deepest needs.” She tangled her fingers in his hair and her eyes
shimmered with emotion. “A real hero.”

He glanced away. “That’s not me.”

“It is.” She drew his face around until he faced her again.
“You saved my brother. And you saved me. You put everyone else ahead of you and
you took the risks no one else wanted to take. That’s a hero to me.”

He still disagreed about the real hero here, but if the woman
he loved saw him as one, he wouldn’t argue. To Brody, Kate was the heroic one,
determined and smart, the one who had saved him from an empty life. He cupped
her jaw, and ran a thumb along her chin. “I love you, Kate Spencer.”

A smile burst across her face, bright as the sun. “I love you,
too, Brody. I think I fell for you the minute you brought that silly basket up
to the counter for your grandmother.”

He chuckled. “I was too distracted by you to make a smart
buying decision.”

“Good thing.” She grinned. She held up the key ring again. “You
know, there’s only one thing this ring needs now.”

“What?”

“Keys to a second location. As soon as I get home, I’m calling
that realtor. There will be a Nora’s in every town, or at least a lot of them.”
She laughed.

“And I’m thinking of taking on a partner for the practice, so I
can keep treating people here in Newton, but also step up my mission work.”

She smiled. “Both of us, taking risks.”

“Together. The best way to do it.”

She laid her head against his chest. “I agree, Brody. I
agree.”

“The best choice I ever made was that basket. And…you.” His
heart, no his entire world, were complete now with Kate in his arms. He could
see their future ahead, one where she brought smiles to people everywhere there
was a Nora’s Sweet Shop, and he healed the sick and wounded in far-flung places.
There would be some compromises ahead, making both her business and his mission
trips work, but Brody had no doubt they’d find a way because in the end, he and
Kate had the same core values. The same goals. To create a world full of heroes.
And he couldn’t wait another minute to start on that path. “I meant what I said.
I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me, Kate?”