Authors: H. M. Ward
When Mari pulled back, Trystan
asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”
She shook her head. “Not really. I finally stopped crying and there’s only twenty minutes or so until the period is over. I’d rather just sit here like this. You make me feel so much better, I can’t even tell you.”
Trystan kissed her temple softly, pulling away slowly, like it pained him. “You make me feel better
,
too.”
She smiled. It wasn’t full wattage, but it was a start. After a second Mari said, “I’ve been banished from the theatre after school.”
He nodded, “I heard. You punched Brie in the face.” He couldn’t help it, a smile spread across his lips as he watched her.
“I didn’t mean to. It just happened. One minute she was threatening me and the next my fist was crushing her nose.” Mari spoke quickly, like she couldn’t believe she was telling him this. Panic laced her voice, but he didn’t know why. It was a hit, and from what he knew of Brie, she deserved it. “Anyway, Tucker banished me for the rest of the semester, so I won’t be able to see you until after.”
Smiling, Trystan
asked, “You want to see me after?”
Nodding, she said, “Yes. I was thinking about things—about what I posted on your Day Jones wall—and I’ve decided something.” Mari spoke slowly, her eyes drifted to the floor as she spoke.
Trystan’s stomach felt like it was in a free fall. Was she saying what he thought she was saying? He tried to stay coo
l and act like he didn’t know what she was talking about
. “
What’d you decide?”
Mari was silent for a moment as she looked at the floor,
with
those long dark lashes blinking slowl
y. When she looked up at him, Trystan
knew he’d give her anything she wanted. Her brown gaze was intent, focused on his face
, making Trystan’s
heart race faster. Suddenly
,
he was much more aware of her weight on his lap, the curve of her hips in his hands, and the way her chest swelled when she breathed.
Staring at her lips, he waited for her to say it.
“I want to be with you.”
Trystan’s mind erupted with conflicting
thoughts
, both warring to win. But the thing that came out of his mouth was Mari’s thoughts on the matter, not his, “But
,
you said you wanted to wait until you were married. I love you, Mari, but don’t change things for me. That’s part of who you are.”
She looked into his eyes, pinning
Trystan
in place, making him want to squirm. “I need you,” she said so softly that he barely heard it. When he didn’t answer, Mari rested her head on his shoulder and said, “Please, Trystan.”
The
please
and the way she said his name
made
Trystan
come undone. Before he could do something stupid, he kissed her cheek and slipped
Mari
off his lap. The look of horror on her face struck him like a bat.
Quickly, Trystan
said, “I can’t say no to you. I’ll do anything you want, be anything you need. I promise, but I’m not doing it in the school basement. You deserve more than that and if you keep sitting on my lap and talking about having sex with me, we won’t be talking about it anymore.” Mari’s face flushed and she looked away. Trystan put his fingers under her chin and pulled her gaze back toward him. “I love that about you. I love how
you can blush like that.
Actually,
I
uh…
wrote a song about it.” Before he knew what happened, Trystan grabbed the guitar and was tuning it, talking about one of the songs he wrote for her.
“You wrote a song about me blushing?”
Mari
asked, surprised.
Trystan looked up from below his brow and smiled at her. “Sort of. It’s about all the little things you do
; the things
that make me love you.”
Placing his fingers on the
strings to form the
cord, Trystan began to strum. It was a song that was Mari to the core. It revealed more of
Trystan’s
heart, but he didn’t care. He wanted her to smile
and he knew this would help. Trystan
sang, watch
ing Mari, as he slipped
his hand ac
ro
ss the neck of the instrument, allowing the notes to fill the air. As he played, her lips lifted into a smile and her brown eyes glittered just for him. Trystan couldn’t help but smile back at her.
Everything about
Mari
was magic. She touched him like nothing else could
,
and honestly, the thought of having sex with her was
equally
appealing and terrifying. If a look
from Mari
cou
ld produce that much emotion, Trystan
wondered what sex would do.
If
Mari
had her way, Trystan was going to find out. The song ended and Trystan remained where he was, across from her on a stool.
Mari stood with a sweet smile on her face and walked slowly toward him, her hips swaying
gently
as she came closer. “That was so incredible. The way you see things is so pure, so intense, and so
vulnerable
at the same time.” Stopping in front of him,
Mari
took the guitar from his hands
,
making Trystan’s pulse pound
harder in his ears.
He watched her, saying nothing as she set the guitar down and stood in front of him. A smile spread across
Mari’s
lips. “You think blushing is sexy?” She placed both hands on his thighs, splaying her fingers, leaning in close to his lips.
“I think everything you do is sexy.”
“Kiss me,” she commanded
, and he did.
Trystan’s
hands threaded in her hair and pulled her mouth down on his
,
tasting her sweet, hot kiss on his lips. Heart hammering in his chest, Trystan let the kiss grow stronger and hotter, tasting
Mari
when she opened her mouth,
and
stroking her
tongue
with his. They were both breathing hard when the bell rang and shattered the moment.
Mari stood and stepped away, her hands shaking slightly.
Grinning at him, she said, “You follow directions really good.”
Trystan laughed. He stood and rushed toward her, snatching her up by her waist and spinning her around until she shrieked. When he set her down, Mari looked up at him smiling like everything was all right.
After a second, Mari reached into her pocket and fished out a piece of paper and handed it to him.
“It
’s
my address and my cell. Come by later, okay?” Suddenly, she was shy again.
Trystan looked at the address, and confusion pinched his face. “I thought you didn’t want your parents to know?”
“They won’t. They’re working for the next four nights.”
Trystan felt his heart speed up. The way she looked at him said she had plans for all four nights.
CHAPTER
8
~MARI~
After school, Katie sat with me at the diner. We ate a bunch of fried food and topped it off with ice cream. I was so nervous. I’m not sure what person took over my brain and invited Trystan Scott into my bed, but she was gone now and I was left with moody Mari who fretted over everything.
“What’s with you?” Katie asked, dipping a fry in ice cream before popping it in her mouth. “You’ve been out of sorts for days.”
I shrugged, “PMS?”
She laughed, “Yeah, right. More like boy-on-the-brain. Don’t tell me that you’re still pining over Trystan.”
I shook my head
confidently
. That wasn’t a lie. I wasn’t pining over him at all. “No, of course not.”
“Then what is it?”
I debated telling her what had me on edge. The question was could I tell her and omit names? I didn’t know. And if Katie snooped, she’d see it was Trystan coming to my house later. I decided to risk it. I needed someone to talk to about it and I sure wasn’t asking my mom. “You know how I was going to wait to be with someone? Well, I changed my mind.”
Katie’s jaw dropped open and the ice cream slipped out. It splattered on the table in one big goopy slop. Neither of us said anything for a moment. As she wiped up the ice cream glob, she asked, “What
? Why?
”
I shrugged, “I don’t know. I thought it’d be romantic to wait for the guy who’d marry me, but now that just seems corny.”
Corny was the wrong word. The real reason was that I felt so alone and I thought that sex would make it better. I wanted to feel wanted.
Katie stared at me like I’d grown two heads. “Something’s not right here, but I have no clue what it is. Who are you and what have you done with Mari?”
“Stop it, Katie. I wanted to talk to you about it.” My voice was serious, pleading almost. I felt stupid for bringing it up.
Katie noticed and became serious. In a hushed voice she said, “Don’t do it. Having sex will bind you to tha
t guy for the rest of your life
. Be picky about who you’re with. Honestly, I used to laugh at you, but when I see
him
,” she couldn’t stand to say her first boyfriend
’
s name, “now, well, I think you had it right. I wish that I’d waited for someone that I wanted to be attached to forever.”
Katie’s eyes darted away from mine as she spoke, as if she were ashamed of what she did. “But it felt right at the time, didn’t it? How were you supposed to know he wasn’t
forever?
”
Katie laughed bitterly, “I knew, Mari. He wasn’t the one. I just didn’t bother waiting. Maybe it was stupid, but I didn’t think I’d get another chance. Now I’ve learned that there’s always another chance, another guy willing to do it. They’re not picky when it comes to sex, so I figure
I
have to be.”
“You think I’ll regret it?” I asked, my voice nearly a whisper.
She nodded. “You sound disappointed. What did you think I would s
ay? You see the way I avoid my ex
. Whatever amount of fun I had wasn’t worth worrying about getting knocked-up or contracting something gross. It probably sounds funny, but you rubbed off on me. I’m waiting from now on. The guy has to prove he loves me and stick around for a while
before he gets into my pants.” Just then t
he waiter walked by and nearly tripped as he overheard Katie. She was blunt and
gorgeous
. Hearing her talk about sex made guys salivate.
My gaze fell to the table as I played with my napkin.
Katie asked,
“Are you going to tell me who he is?”
“Not yet.”
CHAPTER
9
~TRYSTAN~
Trystan looked at th
e piece of paper in his hands. Theatre p
ractice had dragged on, mainly because Brie refused to cooperate with her face looking the way it
did
, but it was finally over and he was on his way to see Mari
. The streetlights
cast
a yellow glow on the pavement.
The night air wasn’t as frigid as last evening.
Trystan walked past Mari’s house, not stopping in front. His heart
raced faster,
as his mind repeated the words she’d sai
d earlier. Lowering his gaze, Trystan
shoved his hands in his pockets and walked on. Circling the block, Trystan came up behind Mari’s house, cutting through the neighbor’s backyard to remain out of si
ght.
Although Mari didn’t ask him to sneak up to her house
, Trystan was too smart to be seen. No one wanted him around their daughter and Mari’s parents were probably worse. She was smart, like really smart. They probably wanted to send her off to some Ivy
League
school next year and he’d never see her again.
Trystan sighed, pushing through the spot where the fences met. Neighbors might have looked
cordial
in this neighborho
od, but they were cheap. That l
ast inch of
vinyl fence was an expense that
no one
wanted to pay,
since it was covered by tall shrubs and trees. Trystan twisted sideways and sucked in to press himself between the gap
s
in the fence. No one saw him do it.
Within seconds, he was standing on Mari’s back porch, looking up at the two story house, with his eyes fixated on the only bedroom with a light shining through the windows. Mari crossed the room, her hands stretched above her head
,
as she pulled her hair into a ponytail.
As if she sensed him, Mari stopped and turned toward the window. Slowly, she stepped to the sill and looked down. A smile slipped across her face. The window was already open and her curtains fluttered in the breeze.
Smiling down at him, she said, “You could have come to the front door.”
Mari had on a white cami and jeans. There was a patch of lace at the top
of the cami
, but the shirt was cut lower than anything she usually wore. It was the kind of tank
top that
Mari would have layered, but
tonight
she had
n’t. Her arms were bare, her hair pulled up, and that smile on her face made
Trystan
want to cli
mb up the side of the house to her
.
“I didn’t wa
nt to risk being seen. You
know, by nosy neighbors and all that.” Trystan had his hands in his pockets. He might have looked
suave
on the outside, but his pulse was pounding in his ears and the paper with Mari’s address on it was
getting
strangled in his pocket.
Mari leaned on the windowsill. Her breasts curved beautifully, swelling
,
as she leaned on her elbows. “Are you sure this didn’t have anything to do with, I don’t know, being you?”
Trystan
grinned
. “
What does that mean? B
eing me is pretty good, but you’ll have to be more specific.”
She laughed. It was that magical sound he loved. It reached deep into Trystan and he didn’t want it to end. “The Romeo and Juliet thing, this little seduction scene you’ve got going on here. It’s insanely romantic. If you showed up with your guitar
and sang from below my window
, I would have died.”
Trystan snapped his fingers. His palms were so damp from nerves that they nearly slipped past each other without making a sound. “Damn it. I knew I forgot something.”
Mari smiled down at him before straightening up.
“I’ll be down in a second. There’s a door by the kitchen,” s
he pointed the direction he needed to go
, “I’ll come down and open it up.”
“But I was going to scale the wall.”
“Don’t you dare!” she said, still laughing and disappeared from the window.
Trystan walked in the direction she pointed and came to a leaded glass door made from thick wood. His heart dropped into his shoes. Not only was she smarter than him, but she was
way
rich
er. H
e was poor. Suddenly a rush of cold ran through his stomach and he wanted to leave. This was a mistake. There was no way they’d have
enough
in common, coming from such diff
erent backgrounds, but before Trystan
could give it another thought, Mari threw open the door. She looked fantastic, her body all smooth curves and that bared neck was perfect for kissing. Trystan felt every inch of his body respond to her. If only his body listened to his brain.
“I’m glad you came,” she said
shyly
, tucking a stray curl behind her ear. “I started to think you weren’t going to show up.”
Trystan walke
d past her and into the kitchen, trying not to gape. The kitchen
looked like something that belonged in a showroom somewhere. His fingers found his pockets again and hid out in there to conceal the nervous twitch of his hands. “Practice ran late.” Turning toward Mari, he said, “I wouldn’t have missed this.”
“Goo
d.” She held out her hand and Trystan
reached for it, hoping she wouldn’t mind how warm it was. “I mean, I’m glad you came. Not seeing you after school was weird. We’re always together. Did you notice that before?”
His eyes slipped over
Mari’s
body and her face flamed red. “Of course I noticed. I noti
ce every inch of you
,
every day.” He tugged her hand, pulling her into his arms. This was where she belonged. He could feel it. Smiling that wicked smile of his, Trystan said, “For the longest time, I thought you knew, and that you were just playing me.”
“Ha!” she blurted out, and
wrapped her hands around Trystan’s waist. “I was playing you?
You made me so crazy that I couldn’t think straight. I had no clue you thought of me that way at all, I mean, why would you?”
“Are you kidding
?” Trystan
asked, his hands tangling in her hair
, as he tilted her face up to
m
e
et his gaze. “You have no idea what you do to me, how you make my heart hammer in my chest
,
until it feels like I can’t breathe another breath, how one look from those dark eyes sets my skin burning, longing for your touch, or how your smile sets me on edge and fills my dreams until I see you again. I thought you were doing it on purpose, but then I realized that you didn’t know—that you were just being you and I was the one with the problem.”
“The problem?”
“Yeah. I was hopelessly in love with you.” He ran his fingers through her hair as he spoke, brushing the back of his hand against her cheek. She looked up at him with such wide dark eyes, eyes that didn’t trust what they saw. She was afraid he’d hurt her, and Trystan felt exactly the same way.
After a moment, Mari looked down, breaking the intensity of the moment. “Come this way. I want to show you something.” Trystan followed her through the dark house, their fingers laced together. As they climbed the stairs, he knew where they were going, to her bedroom.
Stopping in front of the door, she turned to him. “I thought we could hang out and talk for a while, if that’s all right?”
“That sounds perfect.”
Mari pushed the door open and a smile leaked across Trystan’s face. She stepped into the room and turned to watch his reaction. He glanced around at the white moldings and thick trim around the door and window. There was a flat screen TV on one wall along with a
stereo
and iP
od
dock. A K
indle sat on her night stand, with a computer screen glowing softly o
n
the desk next to her bed. The bed made
Trystan
pause. It was larger than his—well, the one his dad threw away—and was covered in a white and purple bedspread that had a cascade of ruffles on the skirt.
Trystan
turned back to her, an eyebrow rising on his face in surprise, “Ruffles? Really?”
She shrugged, “What’s wrong with ruffles?”
“Nothing,” he said grinning, “it’s just more girlie than I would have thought you’d have. I thought you’d be practical, a solid colored comforter kind of girl.”
“I got it when I was twelve. Everything was purple, white, and unicorns. The bedspread was too expensive to toss, so the ruffle monster remains.”
Mari
folded her arms over her chest as she spoke, like she was embarrassed a little bit.
“It’s sweet. I can’t picture you at twelve, wearing ruffles.”
“I never wore ruffles. My mom
wouldn’t
let me. She said ruffles mad
e
me
look fat.” She shrugged like it didn’t matter, but Trystan could tell it was more than that. There was a rift between Mari and her
mom. He’d heard it before, the
way her voice sounded weary, like she’d given up
on her mom
.