Rising Dark (The Darkling Trilogy, Book 2) (42 page)

Her eyes were two large saucers in the
dimly lit room.

“
The manager is not here,
and the others, they would not tell him, so I do not have to
worry.”

“
But what about me? Can
you be sure I will not tell?”

“
You wouldn’t do that,”
she said calmly, her thoughts reflecting the certainty in her tone.
“You are unhappy, but I still see much kindness in your face. You
are not a cruel man.”

“
Stupid child. You see
this angelic face and build little fantasies around it about the
sort of man I am. You may have guessed a little, but you know
nothing about what I am, or what I am capable of doing. In that way
we are similar.”

I reached over and grasped her chin in
a hard grip. Although she was shocked, she didn’t try to move
away.

“
The staff here, they see
the way you work hard in order to provide for your sick mother. How
they admire you. But they do not know that you wished she was dead
so you would be free of her.”

Her eyes filled with tears as I let go
of her chin and sat back, taking another swallow of my wine. She
gazed at me for a few moments, not bothering to stop the tears that
coursed down her cheeks. The silence lengthened, punctuated only by
her sniffles, the fire crackling in the grate and the occasional
sound of footsteps in the hotel lobby. Finally she
spoke.

“
You are right. It was an
evil thought. But I have only ever thought it that once. Since you
know as much as you do, you must know I could never mean it.” She
struggled with her tears. “I love my mother. She is all I have. In
a few months she will be dead and I will be alone in the
world.”

She got to her feet, wiping away the
tears that continued to flow. “I am sorry to bother you. I
understand you are unhappy and only want to be left alone. I am
sorry.”

She turned and left the room, leaving
me staring at the doorway, guilt settling over me like the heavy
silence she left in her wake. I picked up the bottle of wine she
had brought me. It suddenly felt too heavy in the darkened room. In
a fit of rage and despair, I threw it into the fire. It smashed and
the flames surged and roared as they lapped up the alcohol, a
miniature of the furious rage burning within me at Luna’s
disappearance.

I sat staring at the fire until it
burned to nothing. I remained in the chair until the one within me
dwindled to ashes of despair. Then I returned to my room. I noticed
the mini bar was stocked with more than usual. There were plenty of
little extras I had not noticed in all the months I had been here,
little loving touches left by the little maid. It made me feel much
worse for my cruelty and all the more alone. Her words resonated
with me.

I will be alone in the
world.

There was still a chance of happiness
for her, whereas mine appeared to be lost forever.

As the sun began to rise,
I packed my things, paid the bill, and left the hotel for the last
time, leaving the little maid and the dreams she had built around
me behind
.

Two weeks passed by before I saw the
little maid again. I had settled into a new hotel and established
the same routine as before. In fact I had completely put her out of
my mind when I returned to my new hotel at dawn and saw her
standing outside, searching the street. I was too far away for her
to see me, and it would have been easy for me to quickly
materialise in my room, pack, and wait for her to leave before
vacating that hotel. There were so many things I could have done. I
could have made her forget me, or left France. But I didn’t do any
of those things, something that haunts me, because even then, a
part of me didn’t want to let go of her so easily.

Instead, I took a few moments to
admire the transformation I saw. Her dark brown curls were glossy
and hung down her back. She wore a brand new dress and an
expensive, stylish new coat. But the most heartening change was the
disappearance of the dark circles under her eyes, the colour in her
cheeks and how lifted she appeared to be. The little bird had
blossomed into a beautiful woman.

“
Henriette. What are you
doing here on your own at this hour?”

She spun around, and I couldn’t deny
the fact that the smile that lit up her face when she saw me warmed
my heart. She immediately ran toward me and grasped my
hands.

“
It was you, wasn’t it?
You were the one who did all this for us.”

She was referring to the anonymous
benefactor who had given them a large sum of money, effectively
securing her future. She was well rested now, as she no longer
needed to work at that hotel and had nurses to care for her mother.
They were in the process of moving out of the cramped one bedroom
home they had been in to a house in the country. It was a quiet,
peaceful place for her mother to spend her remaining few
months.

Henriette didn’t wait for me to
respond, but threw herself into my arms, her head against my
chest.

“
Thank you, so much. You
cannot know what this means to my mother. So much worry has been
lifted from her life and mine. She can die now knowing I will be
cared for.” She glanced up at me. “I know I am selfish, but
when
Monsieur
Durand came to us and told us someone had given us all that
money, I knew straight away it was you. And my heart was so full,
because it meant you cared. That you care for me.”

“
It means nothing,
Henriette. I will leave France soon. It means nothing. You have a
chance now, so go home and forget you ever knew me.”

The joy that had brought an infusion
of colour into her cheeks slowly drained away.

“
But...but...you do not
have to leave. I...I was hoping—”

“
I know what you are
hoping for, Henriette. Of what you have dreamt of ever since you
saw me. But I cannot stay in France. I am searching for someone. I
have been for years. I will be leaving to continue that
search.”

“
Another
woman?”

I nodded.

She was crying now, tears flowing
freely.

“
My mother will be gone
soon and I’ll be all alone. I don’t want to be alone.”

I moved closer and placed my hand
against the side of her head.

“
You don’t have to be
alone. You have so many admirers, quite a few at that hotel you
used to work at. You were just too unhappy to notice them. You will
soon find someone, get married and have a houseful of children who
won’t give you a moment’s peace.”

“
But how can anyone else
come close to you?”

“
I...I cannot be the man
you want me to be, Henriette. So go home and forget you ever saw
me.”

I kissed her briefly on the lips and
then walked away, knowing she was watching me get farther and
farther away, the tears streaming down her face.

***

I was sure Luna was dead, for I did
not believe she would disappear from my life for so long without
word. I held myself together during those years with nothing but
hope. But I had found nothing in all that time and the years were
beginning to weigh me down. I did not want to give in to the
desolation and Henriette offered me a way to beat it back. No one
could ever compare to Luna, but seeing Henriette’s tear-streaked
face and the innocent adoration she held for me had eased my pain
for the brief moment I was with her.

So it was on a clear, cool night that
I found myself at the little cottage by the sea I had bought for
the little maid. I convinced myself I was only there to check on
her and make sure they were settled in their new home.

I approached and stood outside where I
observed them through the eyes of one of three nurses who provided
twenty-four-hour care for the dying woman. She was resting in bed,
her breathing laboured, face sallow, dark circles prominent under
her eyes. Her thin grey hair hung down the sides of her head.
Henriette sat by the bed reading to her. The glow I saw that
morning at the hotel had diminished somewhat, but she was still
radiant, if a little thinner. She read aloud until her mother fell
asleep and then she sat and gazed at her, her expression sad and
melancholy.

Henriette
. She jumped when I spoke
her name in her mind, her eyes widening in shock and
bewilderment.
Come to the
window
.

She sat completely still for a moment,
and then placed the book on the bed. Her expression was still
startled, but she got to her feet, and a few seconds later appeared
at the window and peered outside.

A huge smile lit up her face when she
saw me standing outside in the dark. She darted out of sight. I
moved to the front door and it was thrown open a few moments later.
She ran into my arms.

“
Monsieur
Wentworth! It is so good to see you.”

I held her face in both hands and
kissed her briefly on the lips.

“
What are you doing here?”
she asked, holding tight to my hand when I was able to let her
go.

“
Will you come for a walk
with me?”

Staring into her soft brown eyes and
radiant face, I made a decision I have regretted over and over
again.

“
Just one second,
monsieur
.”

She ran back inside the house and
emerged moments later with a coat.

We went for a walk and I told her
everything. I told her what I was and how I was made. I told her
about those long, lonely years in the wilderness...and then I told
her about Luna. She listened, enthralled with my fantastical
stories.

I finished with the reason I had made
the journey to see her.

“
Like you, I do not want
to be alone. If you will have me, I would like to marry you.” I
hushed her as she made to speak. “I will be with you for the rest
of your life and I will always care for you. But if you choose to
marry me, it is on one condition. You can never ask me to make you
into what I am. It was a mistake to turn Luna into a vampire. I
will not do it to another.”

She was beaming, her eyes
shimmering with tears. “Oh,
Monsieur
Wentworth! Of course I will
marry you, but...” She frowned and looked away in anguish. “But
what will happen when she comes back?”

“
Henriette, Luna is not
going to come back. She...she must be dead, for she would not have
left me for so long.”

Henriette still appeared unsure, as if
she wanted to say more.

“
I am yours,” I said. “If
you will have me.”

Those words took her thoughts away
from her concerns and she threw herself into my arms.

“
Yes! Yes, I will marry
you. But I want us to be married straight away. Today!”

I laughed. “Whatever you want,
Henriette.”

It felt good to say those words, and I
envisioned many more years ahead when I could say those words and
give her everything she asked of me.

So it was with a light heart that we
walked back to the cottage. I still grieved for Luna, but some of
those dark clouds had finally been pushed away. I could only see
them getting further away, for it would be many years before the
inevitable.

That morning I dreamt of
Mama. I saw her as I had the day Luna returned to me. She did not
repeat the warning she gave me that day, but it was there in her
silence and the sorrow that marked her face
.

A few weeks later, I married for the
third time in a small ceremony in France. It was a bittersweet
occasion, and I was reminded of the day I made the same vows to
Julia and how different I was then. It was also difficult not to
think of Luna, and how we had longed to be married in a church and
be able to say those vows which our souls had pledged to one
another but the world denied us. But Henriette’s sweet, radiant
face helped me push those sombre thoughts away. She was my life now
and I meant to give myself to her completely.

Immediately after the ceremony we left
for England, as Henriette wanted to see the city where I’d spent my
mortal years. Luna had never expressed such an interest.

When we got to London, I left
Henriette at the house on Germen Street and went to meet my
solicitors to take care of some legal matters. We were supposed to
catch a train to the country, and spend a few days there for our
honeymoon before returning to France to be with her mother. It was
a cold day and rain threatened as I headed back to the house around
seven. I expected to find Henriette waiting for me in the drawing
room with our suitcases, but the house was quiet, cold and dark,
the downstairs rooms empty. There was also no sign of the
housekeeper.

I went upstairs in search of
Henriette.

“
Henriette, hurry or we’ll
miss our train,” I said as I pushed the bedroom door
open.

She was sitting in one of the chairs
in the dark, dressed in a long, pleated white dress which had a
belt tied just above her hips. She didn’t look up when I entered
and her gaze appeared to be fixed on something by the window. I
followed her gaze and at first I only saw a woman’s silhouette. But
the darkness could not conceal her from my vampiric vision, and
when I saw who it was, my soul soared.