Rites of Passage (19 page)

“Thanks. For meeting me, for trying to help.”

“It's nothing. I chickened out. But someone's got to be the first female cadet, right? If I can help you get there, maybe me being too scared to come will pay off somehow.” She glances at her watch again. “I'll email you soon, okay?”

“Okay.” I take a step away. I don't want to leave her. The feeling that I've got someone on the outside I can talk to, someone who may not understand but who's in my corner, helps me breathe just a little bit easier.

 

“Lunchtime. Be back in thirty minutes,” the cadet in charge of marching tours barks when we near the cafeteria again.

Thank God
. Three hours of marching down, two hours to go today. Same schedule tomorrow.

The three other guys marching with me—Evers, Huff, and another cadet who got caught with tobacco—scatter. Sauder, our drill sergeant for the day, waits to take my rifle and lock it in the guard shack. I hand it over. “Sir, thank you, sir.”

He grunts but doesn't respond, so I turn and head toward the mail room. I'd kill for my cell phone but it's against regs so Mom has it at home. I pull my phone card from my pocket and punch in the numbers. Her voice mail picks up right away. “Hey, Mom. It's me. Just calling to see how you are. . . . I wish you were here.” I hang up quickly so she can't hear the shaking in my voice. Then I dial Jonathan's cell phone number before I lose my nerve.

“Colonel McKenna.” There are voices in the background, and the clink of dishes or something.

“Hey, I need to talk to you. You want to have dinner tonight after I'm done marching tours? Maybe get a pizza?” My voice is a bit more demanding than it should be, talking to the cadet colonel and all, but he's my brother first, and he set me up with the KB. I deserve an explanation.

“Why are you calling me? Where are you?” His voice is a low growl. “I'll be right back, guys.” The phone is muffled and then I hear the sound of cars passing by as he steps outside. “You're supposed to be marching tours. Now's not really a good time, Sam.”

“Oh, really? Then when would be a good time to talk about how you totally rigged that inspection?”

“I didn't rig anything.” His words are like knives. One thing he definitely got from Dad is the military man temper. “But you want to talk? Fine. Tell me what happened with you and Matthews.”

My throat swells up. “What?” I can barely manage to get the word out.

“With you and Matthews. What happened? He came to me today to file a complaint.”

“A complaint? I don't understand.” I put my hand against the wall. This does not sound good.

“He says you're hitting on him, looking for a way to get ahead. That you won't leave him alone.”

I'm flabbergasted. “No way. You can't believe him.”

“These are serious charges, Sam. First of all, it's against the rules of the academy for cadets to date.”

I ignore pointing out that the whole stinking military has fraternization rules and that I've heard about them since I was old enough to understand. Not to mention, if I
were
going to be stupid enough to do something here, it certainly wouldn't be with Matthews. “I'm not dating Matthews. I have no interest in him whatsoever.”

“So you didn't follow him the other night when your company was on an MM? I've got five upperclassmen that saw you.”

“Of course not!” My face burns. I didn't follow him exactly. . . .

“He's saying you've been throwing yourself at him since Hell Week. That your roommate is on the verge of leaving because she can't stand constantly getting in trouble for you trying to date cadre. He says she'll corroborate his story.”

Katie would never turn on me. Would she? I try to remember any time where we haven't gotten along. Sure I yelled at her the other night, and told her she needs to pull her weight . . . but without someone forcing her to turn on me, I can't believe she actually would. “Jonathan, she's been in the infirmary since day one. She doesn't know anything. I swear he's lying. I would never—”

“Stop right there, Sam. You can't go around accusing people of lying. That's serious shit here. And besides, you don't have any proof.”

“Does he?”

Jonathan is silent.

“So you'd believe him over me? Even though
he
doesn't have any proof either? Listen, something's going on, okay?” I lower my voice. “I heard Matthews and his dad on the PG after the parade yesterday. He's setting me up. He's trying to get me kicked out.”

I can tell by his hesitation that he knows. “This is ridiculous. If you have something concrete, I might be able to help you. Until then, my hands are tied. I'm hanging up.”

“Wait!” I yell into the phone.

“God, Sam. Not
everything
is about you, okay? Go march your freaking tours and get over yourself.” His voice is shaking. “I know it's hard here. If you can't cut it, just give everyone a break and quit.”

The line goes dead. My hands shake as I stare at the phone in my hand.

Outside, Sauder is yelling, calling us back together to continue our tours, but my legs refuse to follow the orders. I know I need to move. I need to go march the afternoon away, but I can't believe it's come to this. Even my own brother is choosing the Corps over me. How the hell am I going to survive now?

NINETEEN

SUNDAY EVENING, AFTER I'VE COMPLAINED TO REV ABOUT
the call with Jonathan and picked up my KB, and before we're back to acting like Worms, Bekah shows up in my room. Katie hasn't come back yet and I haven't heard anything from her, but Bekah's too involved with my story to care about our missing recruit sister.

“She called him Liam. Like he's got a first name.”

“Liam is a sexy name. He looks like a Liam, you know? God, I want to . . . I don't know . . .
eat
him or something.”

I throw my pillow at her. “He's our recruit brother and you are definitely not a zombie. Stop talking like that.”

She's grinning like the Cheshire cat, though, and I know she's hiding something.

“So, spill,” I say. “I told you about the meeting with the mysterious Jax. Now tell me about Matthews getting you early leave and you disappearing all weekend. What happened?”

But before she can spill, we're interrupted. “On the wall now, Worms!” Matthews barks.

I roll my eyes at Bekah and stand up to put my shoes on.

“What's this about?”

I've forgotten she's never had the privilege of being part of a moment like this. “Smoke show. This is about the time they all start.” We jog out of my room and onto the wall.

Before we're even standing at attention, Matthews is on us. “Too slow. Do it again. Now!” Matthews's voice makes us all jump to action.

I rush back into my room and Bekah follows. “This should be a fun evening.”

“Yeah, well, this is what we do every night while you're away team building with track.” I stand by the door, hand on the knob, and wait. It doesn't take long.

“Get out here now! On the wall! Let's go.”

Both of the corporals are yelling now and I rush to my position again.

“McKenna, it's come to my attention that you had the balls to call the cadet colonel on his personal cell phone over the weekend.”

How the hell did he find out about me calling Jonathan? I swallow hard before I speak. It doesn't matter right now that Jonathan is my brother, apparently. “Corporal Matthews, yes, Corporal Matthews,” I yell.

The smile on his face makes him look like a piranha about to pick his teeth with my bones. “And you, let me get this straight, invited him to
hang
with you and eat pizza?”

Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath. No matter what I say here, I'm dead. “Corporal Matthews, this recruit called this recruit's brother in hopes of spending some time together, Corporal Matthews.”

“Are you freaking kidding me?” He's so close to me, I can smell the burger he had for dinner. “He's not your brother anymore. He's your
colonel
! And please tell me that the rumors of you off campus in the middle of the night without signing out aren't true.”

I lose focus on the hallway, blinking hard. Everything's moving too fast. And then I remember the sound of footsteps on the walk. Someone overheard us. Someone connected to Matthews.

Matthews is having me followed.

He shakes his head, taking a step back and turning away from me, facing my recruit brothers. “If it had been any of you other Worms, you'd have been doing push-ups until graduation! But no, just because McKenna's brother is in charge of the Corps, she thinks she'll get away with it.” When he turns back to me, his eyes flashing, I know he's about to deal me a deathblow. “Let me see your KB, McKenna!”

“Corporal Matthews, excuse this recruit, Corporal Matthews?”

“Did I freaking stutter, McKenna? Your KB. Now!”

When I give it to him with a shaking hand, he holds it up, the small book of DMA history that is causing so much freaking trouble right now. “Take an eye!”

“Snap!” In unison, all my recruit buddies snap their heads to Corporal Matthews, the word a signal to the cadre that we're all listening and moving as one. But I can't.

“I'm dead,” I whisper to Kelly.

“In my hand, I have your recruit sister's KB. A book she cared so little about that she left it on the side of House Mountain the night of your MM. A book she
defaced
with permanent marker!” He flips through the pages, making sure each of my recruit buddies get a good look at the black Xs. “Get it back!”

“Pop!” Again, in unison, my recruit buddies turn their heads, this time facing the wall in front of them.

“You filthy, disgusting Worms. I have never heard of anyone losing their KB before. Never in my two years at the DMA has anyone lost such a precious piece of our legacy. Never in my two years at the DMA has anyone had the balls to mark through
every single page
. But for that same person to treat the chain of command with such disrespect shows her lack of willingness to be part of the DMA, to be fully invested in what we are trying to do here.” He takes a breath before continuing. “You make me sick, McKenna, and now your recruit buddies are all going to see what happens when one of their own screws up.”

“Push-up position,” Corporal Julius demands.

We drop to our hands and knees, quickly getting into position.

“Hold there.” Matthews continues the order. “Alpha Company. You are only as strong as your weakest link, and right now your weakest link has long hair and tits. Down!”

I lower myself, nose almost on the floor, back straight, heart pounding.

“Hold there,” Corporal Julius barks. “Is she worth all this? The pain you know you're going to endure tonight? Is it worth it to have her here? Up!”

I lengthen my arms, wondering how long this barrage is going to continue. If someone in charge walked in, Matthews would get in a world of trouble. Where the hell is Drill? The adults?

“Right now, you're in second place for Company of the Year. Can you not join together as recruits of the finest company at the DMA and get rid of your weak link? Animals kill those among them who are weakest. If you can get her the hell out of here you've got a chance of being top dog again. Down!”

Near the ground again, I risk looking to my left. Kelly's eyes are wide, but he stares straight at the ground, not looking at me.

“By now you should know all your uniforms inside and out. What goes with each, how each one looks when it's up to military standards. You have two minutes. I want you in summer blues. Go!”

I push myself up and run to my room, throwing my wall locker doors open. Short-sleeved shirt, wool pants, shirt stays, black socks, black shoes, belt, name tag. My fingers slip on the buttons and I have to attach my shirt stays three times before they'll actually stay. My belt buckle is smudged with a fingerprint, but I make it out on the wall before any of my recruit buddies. The muscles at the corners of my mouth want to turn upward but I don't allow myself a victory—even one as small as this.

It takes another minute before the rest of the company is out and by the time the last one is against the wall, the corporals are yelling orders again.

“Battle dress! You have three minutes! Go!”

I run back in, ripping my shirt off so fast two of the buttons pop off. I'll deal with that later. Brown undershirt. Camo pants. Camo blouse. Combat boots. Cover. It's the easiest uniform we've got.

Kelly beats me out to the wall but I'm just seconds behind him. I stand at attention again, not able to catch my breath but still holding my own. Weakest link, my ass.

“Alpha Company! You've got two recruits who think it's fun to get out on the wall before the rest of the company. They're leaving you behind. Does that make you happy?”

“Corporal Matthews, no, Corporal Matthews!” The answer is muffled coming from each of the rooms.

“So stop where you are now and switch it up. Dress blues. Go!”

Kelly and I run back into our rooms. I tug the camo blouse up over my head and drop my pants to the floor. Back to wool pants, but this time I've got a long-sleeved woolen tunic to put on—something that takes someone else to zip and button closed.

I'm screwed.

I hear doors slamming as my recruit buddies make their way out to the wall. Straining, I try to do up the buttons, but there's no way—and Matthews knows it.

“Come on, McKenna! Everyone's waiting on you!”

I'm sure they are, Matthews, since you rigged the freaking deck on me. Never mind that I'm not the only female having this problem.

Bekah's obviously the focus of Matthews' little game.