“You had to take time off work?”
“Yeah, three days. Kayla took Monday for me, so I could at least get a little work done. But unless Lily was sleeping, she was attached to me. It’s gonna take me a week to just get caught up. I love her, but man, I was ready for a break.”
I giggled. “I get it. My nieces are the same way with my brothers-in-law. Something about little girls and their daddies.”
“And you? Were you a daddy’s girl?”
“Oh, hell, yes. When I was sick, all I wanted was my dad.” I smiled. “He used to give me M&Ms and tell me they were magical medicine.”
“I haven’t tried that.”
“It worked every time, until I figured out that if I “played” sick, I’d get M&Ms. Mom shut that down pretty quick.”
Alex laughed. “Fuckin’ A, the emotional blackmail girls can dish out.”
“Quit paying the ransom and maybe we’ll stop.”
“Never gonna happen.” He linked his fingers with mine. “It’s way too much fun.”
I grinned, my heart light as we drove into Portland. “Did you ever visit Booker?”
“Not at his place, no.”
“But you know where he lives.”
“Yeah, babe.”
“Are you guys friends outside of the club?” I asked.
He let out a weird sound. Chuckle? No, maybe snort. Chortle? Yes, it was definitely a chortle.
I squeezed his hand. “What?”
“Booker was one of the kids my parents’ took in to foster. He and I have a complicated past.”
“I didn’t realize he was a foster child,” I said sadly.
“He had a shit life, baby. It’s why he works so hard to make his current one good.”
“Why is your relationship complicated? Are you not friends?”
“We’re gettin’ there,” Alex said. “My dad molested most of the girls who came through our house. I didn’t know about it until Annie. She made a formal complaint through CPS, but it got lost or buried, or something. Not sure. Booker hacked into the computers and found it. It set in motion a series of events that sent my dad to prison for a very long time.”
“And you blame Booker for that?”
“Fuck, no. I hated my dad, but as a kid, I didn’t know just how much of a bastard he was. He used to smack my mom around and me too, ’til I got big enough to defend myself, but I still didn’t know the depths of evil in him. Booker nailed him to the wall. I was thankful for it.”
“So, why the tension?”
“The issue came when Annie got pregnant by some douchebag in high school and had an abortion that went bad. Booker thought I’d knocked her up, so he’s hated me for years. We’re cool now, but can’t say we’re gonna share our feelings anytime soon.”
I smiled. “No, that’ll probably take some time.”
“Where am I parking?”
I looked out the windshield to see we were almost at our destination. “I have Macey’s code, so we can park in her extra space.”
He nodded and guided the truck into the underground parking structure and I directed him to the space. I pulled out my phone. “I just have to check with Macey and make sure she’s comfortable with you coming up.”
“I don’t bite.”
“No, I know. It’s not that.” I wasn’t sure what to say at this point. It’s not as though Macey’s life was a secret, but I also didn’t want to drag her shit out onto the street so to speak.
He sighed. “It’s fine, babe. I’m a lot to take.”
“She was raped.”
“Fuck,” he rasped.
I grimaced. “It’s been almost three years since it happened and for the most part, it’s done, but she gets nervous around men she doesn’t know and it’s why we rally around her when Dallas is gone. Usually Bailey or I stay with her so she doesn’t have to be alone. The guy broke into her old apartment, so she doesn’t always feel safe when she’s by herself.”
“Understandable.”
I nodded.
“I don’t have to come up, Payton. I can wait in the lobby, or here in the truck. Whatever she feels comfortable with. I can even hang at Booker’s place until you’re ready.”
“Thank you. I’ll see how she feels and go from there.” I texted Macey to let her know what was happening and she responded immediately. “She said that Dani and Booker are already there, so she’s fine with you coming up.”
“It’s a party, apparently.”
I giggled. “I wouldn’t be surprised if Bailey and Brock are also there already. I’m usually late, so Brock said he’d take Bailey.” I checked my phone. “I’m only twenty-two minutes late tonight, and I probably would have been on time if a certain badass biker dude didn’t delay me.”
Alex laughed. “Next time I’ll make the wait a little more enjoyable.”
“Good lord, the thought of you ever making anything more enjoyable might kill me.”
Having released his seatbelt, he leaned forward and kissed me. I was still locked in, but not for long. Still holding my lips hostage, he freed me from my belt and pulled me onto his lap. I slipped my fingers into his hair and slid my tongue into his mouth, deepening the kiss.
Alex held me close, but I couldn’t get close enough and groaned in frustration as I cupped his face.
“Baby,” he said between kisses, “I’m not fuckin’ you in the truck in a parking garage. You need to quit with those noises.”
I leaned back and frowned. “What noises?”
Alex cocked his head. “You don’t know?”
“I groaned because I was frustrated… obviously not helping the situation,” I said.
“No, babe, before that. Never mind.”
“What?” I said and gripped his shoulders. “Tell me.”
He chuckled. “I just thought you were gonna come.”
I slapped his arm. “I do
not
sound like I’m going to come when I’m kissing someone, Hawk. That’s disgusting.”
He cupped my bottom and gave it a gentle squeeze. “You do when you’re kissin’ me.”
“I do not.” My face flamed. “Let me go.”
“No.”
“Hawk,” I warned, and tried to shift off his lap.
“Payton, settle,” he said. “Don’t be embarrassed baby. Nothin’ about what we’re doin’ should embarrass you.
“You just said I sound like I’m having an orgasm while I’m kissing someone. Now I’m thinking back to all of the other men I’ve kissed and wondered how many times I’ve done that without knowing.”
Alex’s body stiffened. “How many guys have you kissed?”
“Several.”
“Fuck me, Payton.”
“Well, you asked! I’ve kissed a lot of guys, Hawk. But I’ve only slept with two. And they were two men I loved very much once upon a time, and with whom I’m still friends. Neither of them mentioned noises when I kissed them… I barely made noises when we had sex, so I’m sorry if this is taking me a bit by surprise.”
He looked at me like I was an alien. “You didn’t make noise when you came? Ever?”
I pushed at his shoulders again. “I’m not having this conversation with you.”
“Babe, tell me.”
“No. I don’t kiss and tell, Hawk. I like to keep my past my past.”
“Payton?”
“What?”
“Did they make you come?”
I gasped. “What? That’s none of your business.”
He frowned. “They didn’t make you come.”
“I’m not taking the bait, Hawk. It’s none of your business.”
“Okay, baby, we’ll leave it there for now.”
“Forever,” I said.
“For now.” He patted my bottom. “How do I get Alex back?”
“Stop being such a jerk.” My phone buzzed but I ignored it.
“Okay, baby.” He smiled, and honestly I had no idea why he was so smug. “I’ll stop being a jerk.”
“What are you up to?” I asked, narrowing my eyes at him.
He laughed. “God, you’re gorgeous, Payton.”
My phone buzzed again. “Stop being sweet and tell me what you’re up to.”
“I’m not up to anything, babe. Promise.” He picked up my phone that was sitting on the seat beside us. “We should get upstairs.”
Just to drive home his point, my phone buzzed again. I snatched it from him and checked my texts, still sitting in his lap, mind you. I liked sitting here. Gah! I was insane.
“Let’s go,” I said, still looking at my phone, but he held firm. “What?”
“Hey,” he whispered. “Look at me.”
I met his eyes and bit my lip.
“I like everything about you, baby, yeah? Don’t ever feel self-conscious or embarrassed about your responses to me. We’re new. We’re figurin’ shit out.” He stroked my cheek. “You’re beautiful, Payton.”
I sighed. “And you’re back to being sweet.”
Alex chuckled. “Come here.”
He drew my head down for another delicious kiss, but this time I made sure I didn’t make any noise whatsoever.
“Don’t like that, baby,” he said, and broke the kiss.
I scowled. “Now I’m not kissing right?”
“You’re kissin’s fine, baby. It’s you all locked up and stiff.”
“You could tell?”
“Yeah, Payton I could tell.” He smiled. “I want you to let go. Just let it happen, yeah?”
“I’ll think about it. But right now, we have to get upstairs.” I scooted off his lap and was relieved when he let me.
I
CLIMBED OUT of the truck before he could make it to my side and waited for him to grab my stuff from the back. Once he had my bag, he took my hand and we headed to the elevator and up to the lobby.
There was a new doorman, apparently, so we went through the normal process of signing in and getting permission to ride up to Macey’s floor, but we did it without the friendly banter that I normally had with the other doormen. I was glad, however, this new person was as diligent as the others.
I knocked on my old apartment door and my brother pulled it open. “Nice of you to join us, sissy,” he said, and pulled me in for a hug.
“Shouldn’t you be gone by now?” I asked.
He chuckled. “Soon.”
I felt Alex’s hand on my lower back and pulled away from my brother. “Brock, this is Alex.”
My brother eyed him up and then shook his hand. “We’ve met.”
“You have?” I asked.
“Yeah, long story,” Alex said.
“Where have you been for the last twenty minutes?” Macey demanded as she walked into the living room. “You texted to say you were here like six days ago.”
I giggled. “You’re funny.”
She hugged me and then smiled at Alex. “Hey, Hawk.”
“Hey, babe.”
I introduced Alex to everyone he didn’t know, which was pretty much only Bailey. Alex got around it would seem. Dani, Kim, and Booker were already there, so Booker and Alex gravitated to one another while the rest of us reconnected. Dani looked gorgeous in her killer dark blue dress, knee-length and low-cut that showcased her very full chest… I’d die for boobs that big, alas, I was stuck with my B-cups… and a dark blue pair of peep toe boots that showed off her shapely calves.
Kim was new to me and she was gorgeous. I was sure she must be a model, because she was tall, probably five-foot-ten or eleven, with killer legs that went on for days. She had long dark hair, soft brown eyes, and full lips that seemed to be in a permanent smile. She wore a skin-tight tiny black dress that stopped just below her butt and stiletto boots that went up past her knees, emphasizing her long legs, and she was super sweet.
“Can I get you a beer?” Dallas asked Alex.
“Nah, I’m good.”
“Okay, honey, you can go,” Macey said.
“In a bit,” Dallas said. “Where are you going?”
“I was thinking
Blush
,” Dani said.
“Fuck me,” Booker said.
“Too soon?” she asked, and Kim started laughing.
“I’ll host you at
Blush
,” Booker said. “But another time when I can keep an eye on you.”
Dani giggled. “Killjoy.”
There was obviously a story there and I couldn’t wait to find out what it was.
“We’re going to Mississippi Studios,” Macey said. “Under Oaks and the City Suns are playing.”
“Then where?” Brock asked.
“You’re on assignment all night, honey. Or did you forget?” Bailey said, smiling up at him.
“So?” Brock countered.
Bailey rolled her eyes at me. “So, we’ll be fine.”
“Hey, big brother, we can take care of ourselves you know,” I said. “Hawk’s playing chauffeur tonight.”
“And I got Dani and Kim,” Booker said.
As the group talked logistics and my fellow girl posse objected to the sudden need for babysitters, I turned toward Alex and narrowed my eyes at him. He smiled, but he looked guilty.
Grabbing his arm, I faced the group and forced a smile. “Excuse us for a minute.” Before anyone could respond, I dragged him into the hallway and crossed my arms. “When did all of this come about?”
“What?”
“You know what.” I paced the hall, waving my finger at him. “I’m just curious… do you have to touch your magic rings together to physically become the Super Protecto Twins?”
“Babe.” Alex laughed. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“If you put on glasses, would I suddenly fail to recognize you?”
“Payton.”
He sounded a little peevish, but I was going for contrite.
“There is
one
thing I’ve always wondered, handsome.” I paused in my pacing and settled my hands on my hips. “Do y’all
have
to wear those tights? Are they government regulation, an aerodynamic thing… or just a lifestyle choice?”
“Fuck me,” he whispered as he dragged his hands through his hair.
“So, you didn’t offer to drive just because you were being sweet and wanted to make anything up to me, you are essentially a glorified bouncer.” Okay, now he was looking mildly contrite. “Right. No argument. Got it.”
“If I could speak, Payton, then I could explain.”
“Don’t bother. Go home, Hawk.” All manner of emotion flooded me. Irritation that he had ulterior motives to seeing me tonight, anger that he felt I needed to be watched and he’d obviously planned something with Booker… or worse yet, my brother… and then, just plain hurt. This last emotion deflated me somewhat. Partly because I didn’t want to feel hurt by someone I hardly knew. It brought to light that I’d once again misread the situation, something I didn’t do, and thought he felt the same way I did. At this point, I was resigned. If I continued on the path I was on, I’d get dizzy with wondering whether ‘he loves me, he loves me not.’ I had to cut him loose and move on or I’d be in a constant state of emotional nausea.
“Babe.”
“Just go,” I whispered, and pushed past him to go back inside.
Macey was at my side immediately, wrapping an arm around me, and guiding me to her bedroom. “Are you okay?”
“Yep.”
“Then why are you crying?”
I gasped. “I’m not.”
She grinned and pointed to my face. “Okay, not totally, but you have a little wetness there.”
“Bite me, Macey!”
She giggled, which meant I did too. Gotta give it to my best friend, she knew how to get me out of my head.
“So, what happened?” she asked.
I sighed and flopped into the chair by the window. “He lied. No biggie.”
Macey smiled and sat in the matching chair next to mine. “How did he lie?”
“He told me he’d call me. He didn’t. Granted, Lily was sick, so I get why he couldn’t. And I thought he was being super sweet when he showed up on my porch, all romantic and crap, saying he missed me and that he wanted to make this week up to me. But now I find out this watchdog crap was all planned.
Planned
, Mase. His sweetness was all under the guise of backing up his “brother” to keep Dani and Kim safe.” I shook my head. “And my feelings are hurt. Damn it, Macey, I don’t get my feelings hurt this soon. Boys suck!”
“It had nothin’ to do with Dani and Kim, Payton,” Alex said. He was leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed, his face unreadable.
I squeaked. “Stop doing that!”
“I’ll give you a minute, hmm?” Macey said, and rose to her feet.
“No, it’s all good,” I countered, sinking further into the chair. “Hawk was just leaving.”
He smirked. “I’m not goin’ anywhere, Payton.”
Macey smiled down at me and I glared up at her. “If you leave this room, Macey Stone, I will kill you. Like as in dead, dead. Not figuratively,
literally
. Murder, Macey.
Murder
. I will commit it.”
“Okay, honey. I only ask you make it quick.” Macey grinned and started toward the door.
“I won’t. I’ll make you suffer.”
She slid past Alex and he closed the distance between us, sitting in the seat Macey had just vacated and settling his ankle on his knee.
“Don’t get comfortable, bub, you’re not staying.”
“Payton, you’re overreacting.”
“Don’t tell me I’m overreacting, Hawk. I get to feel how I feel.” I scowled at him. “Do you know
nothing
about women? God, you’re infuriating!”
He smiled at me. Smiled! Gah!
“Break it down for me, baby.”
“No.”
“Babe, you gotta work with me here, or this isn’t gonna work.”
I shrugged. “It’s
not
going to work. I’m calling it.”
Alex chuckled. “You’re callin’ nothin’, baby.”
“I am.” I stood and faced him. “We’re just too different, Alex. It’s okay. I’ve enjoyed getting to know you. I hope we can be friends.”
I watched his face as he stared up at me. His expression gave nothing away, but his eyes. God, his eyes. I bit my lip, hoping the pain would bring me to my senses. It didn’t. Then, he ran his fingers over his sexy moustache and I all I could do was imagine those same fingers on me, but I forced the thoughts aside and took a deep breath.
“Friends,” he said.
“Yes. Friends. You’ve heard of those right?” I crossed my arms. “I’m a pretty decent one, I’m told.”
He pushed out of the chair and moved toward me. I stepped back, grabbing for the edge of the bed when I tripped on the rug… not that I needed to. He caught me, which meant he also pulled me against him. The hand attached to the arm
not
holding me like a vice grip around my waist, slid to my neck and stroked my pulse, and he studied me, his eyes dropping to my mouth, which of course made them dry, so I just had to lick my lips. He smiled again. Damn it!
“What are you doing?” I demanded… okay, demand wasn’t the word, because there was nothing demand-y about my voice. It was shaky and breathy… and might I add, somewhat turned on? God, I was insane!
“Do friends cut off other friends so they can’t get a word in edgewise when trying to explain somethin’ to the other one?” he asked.
“I wasn’t—”
He raised an eyebrow. “Do friends jump to conclusions before askin’ questions in order to understand a situation fully?”
“I didn’t—”
“And tell me, Payton. What kind of friend is consumed twenty-four, seven with the desire to fuck the other one?”
Ohmigod!
“I—”
His mouth landed on mine and I was transported somewhere so far out of the friend zone, it might as well have been the moon and this pissed me off, so I pushed at his shoulders and broke the kiss. I laid my fingers against my lips trying to ignore the tingle.