Robin Lee Hatcher (3 page)

Dru’s voice was soft, almost inaudible, when she spoke again.

“Miss Harris, you must know one thing more. I’m not a well woman. I need someone who won’t mind caring for me as well as the children, when the need arises.”

As if searching for a proper reply, Emily Harris looked toward Gavin. Their gazes held for the breadth of a heartbeat, then she turned away.

“I’m not afraid, if that’s what you’re asking. I returned from my work in Washington because my sister and nephew were deathly ill. I nursed them back to health. I’ll do the same for you, as needs be.”

Rich, young, spoiled, and much too sure of herself. Emily Harris would be more trouble than help. Gavin had seen her type before. For now she would make promises, but she would do whatever she wanted when things got difficult. That’s how it was with women like her.

Dru was silent as she studied the other woman. Perhaps she shared Gavin’s reservations. Perhaps she could see the girl wasn’t suitable for the work she would be required to do.

At long last, Dru smiled, the tension gone from her face. “Tell me more about you and your family, Miss Harris.”

With a sinking feeling, Gavin realized his wife had made up her mind.

Emily walked toward her buggy, Gavin Blake at her side.

“We’ll want to get an early start in the morning,” he said. “Can you be here by eight?”

She had the distinct feeling he didn’t like her. “I will be here before you’re ready to leave.” She lifted the hem of her dress and stepped into the buggy, settling onto the seat before taking up the reins. “Good day to you, Mr. Blake.”

He stepped back from the buggy and Emily slapped the reins against the gelding’s rump. The horse jumped forward, quieting into a comfortable trot as they traversed Main Street.

It had been a strange interview, she thought. Not at all what she’d expected. Drucilla Blake had encouraged her to talk about herself — about Maggie and Tucker, about her nieces and nephews, about her experiences in Washington. The other woman had had many questions, but none of them seemed to have anything to do with Emily’s qualifications as a governess. Emily had wondered if the woman was only making polite conversation and would still not hire her. But it hadn’t happened that way. In the end, Emily was offered the position, and she’d accepted.

Maggie won’t like this.

She clucked her tongue in her cheek and slapped the reins against the gelding’s backside. The sooner she got home, the sooner she could convince her sister that she’d done the right thing.

“I’m afraid your wife is right, Mr. Blake.” The doctor closed the door to the bedroom. “We can minimize the pain with laudanum, but there’s little else we can do for her. There is no treatment that will spare or lengthen her life.”

“But she’s seemed better. Except for her lack of appetite, I thought — ”

“A cancer will often go into a period of remission. The tumor, for some reason we don’t understand, will simply stop growing. Patients may think they are cured when they are not.”

Gavin rubbed his forehead with his fingertips. “Maybe it will last a few more years? When the girls are older . . .” His words trailed into silence as he met the physician’s gaze.

“I wouldn’t pin my hopes on it.” The doctor picked up his hat from a nearby chair. “I’m sorry, sir. Very sorry.”

The snap of the closing door echoed in Gavin’s head. There was no denying the truth any longer. Dru wasn’t going to get better. No matter what he did for her, she would die. She’d long since accepted it. Now he must do the same.

Sinking into the chair by the door, he thought of Sabrina and Petula. What kind of father would he be to them without Dru’s wisdom and guidance? Would he fail? Would he turn to bitterness, like his own father? In most of his memories, the man who had sired him was lost in a drunken stupor. Mean and surly to boot. It had been a relief when he died. Gavin didn’t want to imagine Sabrina and Petula having that same feeling about him.

As for his mother . . . Well, Gavin tried never to think about her. Those memories left a sour taste in his mouth that was hard to get rid of.

Gavin had been on his own since he was fourteen and had little knowledge of what it meant to be a husband and father. What he did know about love, home, and family, he’d learned from Charlie Porter, Dru, Sabrina, and Petula. But things were changing. Again. Charlie had died over two years ago, gored by a bull not long after Dru lost the baby. Now she was dying too, leaving him to raise the girls.

How would he manage?

“Gavin?”

He looked up to find his wife standing in the bedroom doorway. A billowy white nightgown engulfed her bony frame.

“I want to stay in the basin as long as we can. Let Stubs and Jess take the cows to the Lucky Strike. A few more weeks won’t matter much.”

“It might matter, Dru. The weather’s unpredictable in the basin. Winter can come on mighty fast.”

“Please. I won’t ask for more than a few weeks.”

He rose from the chair and strode across the sitting room, stopping within arm’s reach of her.
I’m scared, Dru. I don’t know how to
raise the girls without you.

As if she understood his thoughts, she reached up and touched his cheek. “You’re going to do fine by them. And Miss Harris will help. You’ll see.”

“You just met her. She may be worthless as a governess.”

“I have a feeling about her, Gavin. Please give her a chance. I asked God to send the right woman, and I’m sure that he did.”

He took her in his arms and pressed her cheek against his chest. “All right, Dru. I’ll give her a chance.”

Dru stood at the open window, her left shoulder leaned against the frame, enjoying the kiss of the evening breeze against her skin. Somewhere on the street below, Gavin was walking. Walking and worrying, as he did far too often. If only she could help him release his worries to God. If only he could accept that the God of the universe had it all in control.

Lord, I pray that I made the right choice today. I pray that Miss
Harris was the one you sent to me. I think she is. I saw something in her
eyes. I don’t know what exactly, but something. I believe she’ ll be good
for the girls. And maybe, if it be your will, good for Gavin too.

She closed her eyes and envisioned the beautiful summer range, cattle grazing in belly-high grass, her daughters running and playing and laughing. Oh, her beautiful daughters. God had been so good to allow her to be their mother for a time. It would be so hard to say good-bye to them, but say good-bye she must.

Please, Lord. Help me instill in them a strong belief and trust in
you. Protect their hearts and minds so that the enemy of their souls cannot
turn their sorrow over losing me into anger toward you. You have
provided them with a good man to be their father, to love and to guide
them. Thank you for Gavin. Help them to remain a strong family.

Once again she looked down at the street below. The gloaming had brushed the town with varying shades of gray. In the distance, she heard laughter and voices talking. Perhaps people on their way home from supper in one of the restaurants. Perhaps businessmen who had worked late into the evening.

Father, open Gavin’s heart to love. He needs your love. He needs
the love of Brina and Pet. And he needs a woman’s love too.

She pictured Emily Harris. Beautiful, fair, intelligent. Something told Dru that Emily had a great capacity for love — both to give and to receive.

If it be your will, Lord. If it be your will.

“You can’t mean to go through with this.”

Emily turned from her packing to face her sister. “I do mean to go through with it.”

“But you don’t know these people. They’re strangers to us.”

“Mrs. Blake is an acquaintance of Reverend Cook. He can vouch for the family.”

“You’ll be so far away. It will be harder to reach you in Challis than it was in Washington. Especially during the winter months. What if you get injured or fall ill? What if — ”

“Maggie, I’m not six anymore. I don’t need you to mother me.” She sighed, recognizing how harsh her words must sound. “I’m sorry. I know you only want what’s best. But my heart tells me to do this. I can’t explain why. I just believe it’s true.”

“I shall do nothing but worry about you. This won’t be the same as living and working in Washington. You were with your friend and her family. You enjoyed every comfort. You’re too young to — ”

“You weren’t even eighteen when we came west. You didn’t know anyone on the wagon train. You had to trust Mrs. Foster when she said we could travel with them. You didn’t know where we were going. Not really. You just did what you believed was for the best.”

Maggie’s face registered defeat. “But I don’t
want
you to go.”

In unison, they moved forward to embrace each other.

“I know,” Emily whispered. “I’ll miss you too. Honest, I will. And Tucker and the children and Fiona and my other friends. I’ll miss you all. But it’s only until May or June. That isn’t so very long. And I’ll write. Mrs. Blake told me the post goes up to Challis every week, even in winter.”

Maggie sniffed as she pulled back. “I don’t understand why you feel the need to do this.”

“I’ll be all right.”

Her sister was silent for a long while. Finally, she leaned forward and kissed Emily’s forehead. “Then God go with you, kitten.”

Tears sprang to Emily’s eyes. It had been a long time since her sister called her by her pet name. It brought back a rush of memories, all of them filled with Maggie’s image.

“We’ll take you into town in the morning,” Maggie said, tears glittering in her eyes too. “But I still think you’re making a mistake.”

Three

Tightly held emotions burned the back of Emily’s throat as she looked at the gathering of family and friends waiting outside the Overland. Maggie must have sent messages with several of the Branigan ranch hands to all of Emily’s friends yesterday afternoon, telling them that she was leaving in the morning.

Each one of her well-wishers hugged and kissed her in turn. She managed not to cry until almost the end. The trouble began when her best friend, Fiona Whittier — Tucker’s younger sister — embraced her. Fiona was entering her ninth month of pregnancy, and her belly was so large the two young women found it hard to draw each other close. They laughed about it, even as their tears fell.