Rock Bottom (7 page)

Chapter Fifteen

I stumbled away from the door just in time to avoid being hit with it as Elijah burst back into the room to catch me eavesdropping.

“Everything okay?” No use denying what I’d heard.

He sighed and handed me a cold carton of Chinese takeout. “Yeah, Andy can just be a dipshit sometimes. Do me a favor? Stay away from him.”

“Sure.” I cracked open the carton to find a crap ton of white rice.

“Sorry, that’s all there was in the fridge.”

“I’m normally not a rice person,” I admitted. “But this actually looks
delicious
.”

Elijah’s chest bounced with silent laughter. “I bet it does.”

He produced two forks and we sat together on the edge of his bed to dive in. I was right. That rice was just about the best damn thing I’d ever tasted in my life.

“So . . .” I chewed and swallowed my mouthful of rice, trying to maintain some level of decorum. “Are you some kind of photographer or something?”

His eyes scanned the walls, verifying my earlier assumption that he’d taken all of those pictures. “I like to take pictures.”

“They’re really good.”

“Thanks.” He tried to shrug it off like it was nothing, but I couldn’t let it go that easily.

“Seriously. You’re talented. Do you plan to be a photographer someday?”

“I don’t really plan anything.” He took another bite of rice, scraping the bottom of the container.
How could it be gone already?
“I just take each day as it comes.”

“But how do you know what decisions to make when you don’t have an ultimate goal to work toward?” I was fascinated.

“Simple. I do whatever makes me happy at the time.”

“Don’t you ever regret some of those decisions later, though?”

“Not really. I mean, yeah, occasionally things would be easier if I’d made different decisions in the past, but I try not to think about that. I try to live in the moment and be as happy in each individual moment as I can because you never know when everything will change and everything you’ve been sacrificing your happiness for all along, could just . . . disappear.”

That particular sentiment hit a little too close to home and I sucked in a sharp breath.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean you, Ry. Nothing has disappeared on you, okay? You don’t even know what you really want yet, but when you do? Princess, I promise, nothing will be out of reach.”

I’d tried his do-what-makes-you-happy-in-the-moment thing earlier and he’d turned me down flat. Obviously, what I wanted and what he wanted were two entirely separate things.

“Now what’s going through that head of yours to put that look on your face?”

“Nothing.” The mellowness of earlier had worn off and I was itching to move. “I should go.”

“You can’t.”             

“What do you mean I can’t? Sure I can.”

“Seriously, Ry. Neither of us are good to drive right now.”

Me, I understood, it was my first time feeling these effects. But him? “You can’t drive?”

“Okay, I probably can. But I’m not risking it with you in the car with me.” A warmth spread through me, making me smile at his care. “We wait. Besides, your eyes are ridiculously bloodshot and you probably smell like pot.”

Grabbing a handful of my shirt, I brought it to my nose and sniffed. Shit, he was right. I reeked of the stuff.

“Crap! What am I gonna do?”

“I have some eye drops in the medicine cabinet. You can grab a shower and you said you have a bag in your car?”

“Oh yeah.” Suddenly, I was a flipping
genius
.

“Stay put. I’ll go get it.”

“Okay.”

Elijah slipped out the door and I dropped back down on his bed, silently praying the shower water was better than that sludgy crap coming from the kitchen sink. I rolled onto my side and my keys dug into my hip. Shoot, Elijah would need those to get to the bag.

I hurried after him toward the front door, only to be brought up short when Andy stepped out of the kitchen. His bulky body blocked my way down the narrow hall.

“Hey there, sweet cheeks. What have you and that boy been doing back there all day?” He took a step closer and I took one back. “You want a real ride? I could show you a thing or two that boy can only dream of.”

The repulsive grin returned and I had to choke back the bile creeping up my throat.

“I-I don’t—” I was saved from figuring out where the hell that sentence was going when Elijah’s hand closed over his shoulder, dragging him away from me.

The guy was nearly twice Elijah’s size, but he planted him in the wall with ease. The beer on his breath might have had something to do with that.

“I told you to stay the fuck away from her.” I’d never heard a person growl before. I’d read about it plenty of times, but I’d never actually heard it for myself.

“Hey.” Andy raised his hands in mock surrender. “I was just offering the girl a good time. If you can’t please your woman, don’t take that out on me.”

“Go near her again and I’ll break your face.” Elijah turned, taking my arm and dragging me back toward his bedroom.

“Didn’t I tell you to stay put?”

“I thought you might need these.” I held up the keys in all their triumph.

To which Elijah held up my bag. “You didn’t lock it.”

Dammit
. He always won.

“Come on. Let’s get you looking presentable.”

He escorted me across the hall and showed me where he kept the eye drops, even going as far as helping me squeeze them in my eyes when I couldn’t do it myself. Then, he left me to shower.

There were two different bottles of shampoo. I opened them both and sniffed until I found the one that smelled like Elijah—cinnamon and spice—and used that one. I did the same with the body wash.

Wrapping a towel around my body, I opened the door and nearly collided with his back. “What are you doing?”

“Waiting for you. Just in case Andy got any ideas.” He used his arms and body to shield me from any potential view from the living room as we crossed the hall.

I rooted through my bag, pulling out a pair of jeans and an old, faded tee—I’d packed in a hurry—and turned around just in time to catch Elijah checking out my bare legs. Maybe what I wanted and what he wanted wasn’t so different, after all.

Clearing his throat, he turned his back and folded his arms across his chest as I dressed. “You alright to drive now?”

I considered how I felt for a moment and realized the shower had sobered me up. Almost immediately, the worry crept back in. It was late. I had no idea what time, but it was dark out. There was little hope that I’d be able to sneak back in. My parents were no doubt waiting up for me—and livid. It was going to be a very long night. I already missed the uncaring haze that had helped me decompress all afternoon.

“Can we do this again sometime?”

“Hang out or smoke?”

“Both?”

Elijah chuckled. Peeking over his shoulder to find me fully clothed, he turned to face me. “I think that could be arranged. So . . .” He stepped closer and ran a hand through my damp hair. “You’re sober now.” His minty breath washed over my face. “And I’m sober now.”

I wasn't sure that was one hundred percent accurate, but I wasn't about to argue. He bent his head until his lips barely brushed mine, waiting for what I had no idea. Permission? He had it. He
definitely
had it. Pushing up onto my toes, my lips met his. And then they moved. Gripping my head and angling it so he could get the best access, his tongue traced over my lower lip. When I gasped, he dove inside. Hot damn, he tasted as good as he smelled.

I lost track of time wrapped up in his arms and lips and hands. Those hands roamed everywhere, and so did our feet, apparently, because somehow we ended up back on the bed. When we finally broke apart, I took a ragged breath and found myself chewing a piece of gum I definitely hadn’t been chewing before. Elijah winked at me and I damn near died.

Chapter Sixteen

Surprise, surprise. The parental units were exactly where I knew they’d be when I got home. Mom sitting on the sofa and dad working in his office, waiting for her to sound the alarm so he could pounce. Maybe the whole ‘predictable’ thing was genetic.

“Where have you been?”

“I—”

“She’s home!” And there went the alarm. I didn’t even get a chance to finish my answer when Dad barged into the living room.

“Where the hell have you been? Do you have any idea how worried your mother has been all day? Do you have any respect for us at all?”

With the barrage of questions coming my way, I didn’t know which to answer first, or if I was even meant to answer any of them. My answers wouldn’t matter anyway. Not to them.

“What the hell is wrong with you? What happened to the girl we raised?”

“She realized this was
her
life! Not yours!” I took a deep breath and tried to calm down. Yelling wasn’t going to get me anywhere. “I can’t keep doing things just because they make
you
happy.
I
need to be happy, too.”

“You were happy.” My mother looked distraught sitting on the sofa. Dark circles ringed her eyes and guilt gnawed at my stomach. I really hadn’t meant to make her worry.

“I’m sorry I ran out earlier. I wasn’t trying to hurt you. I was happy before because I was making you happy, but that’s not enough anymore. I need to do what I want to do, go to school where I want to go, study what I want to study.”

“You’re going to Harvard to study pre-med.” My father said it as though it were a foregone conclusion. “If you can still manage to get in by some miracle.”

“What if that’s not what I want?”

“It
is
what you want. It’s what you’ve always wanted!”

“It’s what
you’ve
always wanted!”

My father went rigid at the accusation in my voice, but I wouldn’t back down. Not on this. It was too important.

“I will not allow you to throw away a future we’ve all worked so hard for on some bullshit teenage rebellion crap. I thought we’d passed that by with you. I thought you had your head on straight. I don’t know where this newfound defiance has come from or what inspired your recent lazy streak, but it ends now. You will get yourself together and get back on track or, so help me, you will not like the consequences.” My father’s face was bright red and his entire body shook with suppressed anger. “Get to your room.
Now!
”

Part of me wanted to plant my feet and keep talking until I could make him hear me, but it wouldn’t happen. He’d never listen, no matter what I said. None of it would make a difference to him. The other part of me that just wanted to be as far away from him as humanly possible took the chance to escape and booked it to my room as fast as my feet could carry me.

With the way they looked when I bailed, I knew they’d both be up for a while still. I couldn’t risk calling Elijah and having my father overhear, so I pulled out my cell and shot him a quick text.

They never listen.

His reply came almost instantaneously.

Take it things didn’t go well?

Not exactly. Pretty sure I’m grounded for the rest of my natural born life.

But they let you keep your phone?

They’re new to this grounding thing. Let’s just hope they don’t figure it out.

House arrest hasn’t stopped us before. When can I see you again?

I craved his presence, his touch, the sound of his voice, his laugh, and even those damn dimples. I craved them like a drug. And the drug . . . I craved it, too. I longed not to care, not to keep hearing my father’s angry words echoing through my brain, not to feel them scrape away at my heart just a little bit more each time. Not to feel guilty, and hurt, and angry and alone. But . . .

I’ve probably tempted fate a little too much this weekend.

You’ll be at school tomorrow, right?

Of course I will.

Of course you will. I’ll see you there, then. Sweet dreams, Rylie.

Good night, Elijah. See you tomorrow.

I hated saying goodbye to him. It left me alone with my thoughts. Thoughts that plagued me through the night and straight into the break of day. When my alarm went off, my eyes were puffy and sore. I’d sworn to myself that I wouldn’t cry. Not for people who didn’t understand me, didn’t even try to understand me, and didn’t care. It hadn’t mattered. Sometime in the dark the thoughts and words of failure and disappointment overwhelmed me and I surrendered to them.

***

Worn out and weary, the last thing I wanted was to find Carrie and Angela staking out my locker like a pair of the Queen’s guards.

“I called you like a billion times. What happened? We had plans and you completely blew us off, Ry.” Carrie upset was a rare sight and it gnawed at my gut that I’d been hitting ignore on calls from both her and Angie all weekend, but I really hadn’t been up to talking to them.

“Your name isn’t on the schedule for the meet this weekend.” Angela’s tone rang with accusation.

“I know.”

“You know? What is going on with you, Rylie?” She flipped her golden hair over her shoulder and folded her arms. Angie wasn’t big enough to be intimidating physically, but the girl wore an air of self-importance that could make even full grown men want to cower.

“Nothing. I . . .” There was no use hiding it from them. They’d know soon enough anyway. Everyone would. “I’ve been benched.”

“
Benched?
” Evidently, everyone would know
now
seeing as my two so-called friends had teamed up to announce it to the entire student body.

Angela pressed her lips together and huffed, reestablishing her composure. “You’re the best runner on the team by far. Why on earth would Coach Stabler bench you?”

I wanted to dig a hole and bury myself in it. “He thinks I need to focus on academics.”

“Why does he think that?” Carrie’s perfectly plucked brows drew together in confusion.

“Because . . .”
Kill me now.
“I flunked a chemistry exam.”

“
What?
” Two pairs of eyes nearly bugged out of their sockets.

Surprised? Yeah, me, too.
I wanted to tell them the whole story—the whole truth—but I couldn’t. It was too humiliating.

“Guess that explains why Coach was looking for you this morning.” Carrie tugged on her hair and glanced around. She was never one for confrontation, but Angela had no problem making her displeasure known.

“I can’t believe you let this happen. The whole team’s going to suffer now. There goes our chance at regionals.”

I bit back the urge to lash out at her. To tell her that none of this was my fault. That I didn’t like this anymore than she did. To apologize for my life coming apart being such an inconvenience to her.

“I better go see Coach if he’s looking for me.”