Rock Hard

Kate couldn’t
believe she was about to see Gage Stevens again.

After almost
five years, she would finally come face to face with the man who had once been
ready to give her the world.
His world
. Only this time, he was a
mega-successful rock star and she was some down-and-all-but-out columnist working
for a New York entertainment magazine.

Kate Preston
had been the stereotypical good girl. She had great aspirations for college and
beyond; dreams of becoming a world-renowned novelist. Funny how she had fallen
for the hip and cool rocker Gage Stevens without so much as a second thought.

They’d met
soon after she’d graduated. She’d been hanging with her friends at a local club
where Gage and his band had been playing. Gage was the gorgeous lead vocalist
who’d caught sight of Kate in the dancing crowd. After his performance, he’d
sought her out and asked for a date.

Back then
he’d just been one of those indie band types who performed at a few local shows
and bars every so often. He’d been charming and without question, he was the
most handsome man Kate had ever met. He pursued her with a relentless zeal that
had her succumbing in the end despite the fact that she’d never have imagined
them being compatible.

Kate had
never really met anyone quite like Gage. He swept into her world and tipped it completely
upside down. Well,
swept
was an understatement. He had crashed into her
life like a destructive wave determined to crush even the smallest rock on the
shore, consumed her very being, and before too long, he was all she could think
about.

He believed
that nothing was as important or worth worrying about except your dreams. He
was also very romantic; he surprised Kate constantly with unexpected dates and
heart-warming antics. It had been so easy to fall for him. Especially when he
was also such a thoughtful, generous and passionate lover. The nights she’d
known in Gage’s arms had been impossible to recreate with anyone else –
not that she’d dated that many after Gage in the past five years.

The truth was
that no man had ever come close to Gage since she’d left him all those years
ago.
For the last five years, Kate
had regretted breaking up with Gage Stevens – more so than ever in the
last few months, though she wasn’t quite sure why.

At the time
of their breakup she’d thought she was being realistic when she’d told him, all
those years ago, that his dreams of being a rock star would get him nowhere and
that he needed to get a ‘real’ job.

But now that
he was a rock god and her own career in journalism was stagnant, she didn’t
need a soothsayer to tell her how wrong she’d been.

And now for
the first time, Kate was attending one of his concerts.

Sold out,
Gage performed that night to hysterically screaming fans. His stagecraft had
been breath taking, his voice and music so powerful live as it was in studio
recorded music. He moved so naturally, thrilling the watching crowd to a fever
pitch. It was so easy getting caught up in the moment. The atmosphere in the
arena was incredible and Eva could understand now why Gage was the rock star he
was. Even though she’d known Gage years ago when he’d just been a struggling
rock act, she couldn’t help feeling star-struck. On the stage, above that
crowd, he came alive like no other performer she’d ever seen.

Song after
song seemed to send the crowd into more of a rock ‘n’ roll-induced fever. The
roaring crowd knew every line of every song as they sang along. Songs of
passion, desire, rebellion and heartbreak. Kate couldn’t deny, even to herself,
that she loved his music. What was there not to love?

The grinding
beat and the thrash of the guitars, the frenzied drums and then of course, Gage
singing in that deep, raspy voice that stirred the blood and left her heart
exploding in her chest.

Everything
was pulsing; kaleidoscopes of lights bursting around from the screens around the
stage. Such powerfully charged choreography and showmanship. Now Kate
understood what it really took to be a mega-star. It didn’t look so easy from
where she stood in the crowd. Gage Stevens more than earned his rock god status
and after four hours of high-powered performing, the live show was over.

Being made to
attend one of his concerts and meet him backstage for an exclusive interview
had been something Kate had been dreading for weeks. She’d done all she could
to get out of the assignment but her editor had insisted, especially when it
was known that Kate used to date Gage Stevens.

Kate had
mentioned it several months ago to a friend and co-worker – who obviously
hadn’t been able to keep the tidbit to herself. So when the chance came up to
get to interview him for their magazine, her employers had easily picked her.

In all the
past few years or so that Gage’s career had sky-rocketed, Kate had not attended
any of his concerts once. And now that it had been part of the assignment to do
so, she was glad the assignment was half over.

Now all she
had left to do was meet up with him for the interview, get it done as soon as
possible and then escape back to her ordinary life. If she was lucky,
everything would be wrapped up in an hour or less.

And if the fates
were on her side at all, he wouldn’t even remember who she was. He wouldn’t
recognize her and she could carry out her duty professionally and quickly. One
could only hope.

Now heading
backstage armed with her pass, Kate squeezed through the sea of eager female
groupies in their scanty get-ups, all hoping for a chance to get access to Gage
or any of his band who’d exited the stage finally just half an hour ago.

Hefty
security guards had their hands full keeping away the mob of beauties. Once
Kate was cleared, one of them let her through and led the way to Gage’s
dressing room.

Kate’s heart
started to beat faster as the time drew near to come face to face with Gage
again.

She went
through the maze of corridor after corridor following the muscle-bound security
guard, her head in a whirl. For days she’d racked her brain on how she could
handle this. Friendliness and humor, or professional charm and poise? 
They hadn’t exactly parted enemies but Kate couldn’t help having a wary feeling
Gage Stevens might still hold a grudge. After all, she’d dumped him just when
he was at his all-time low professionally.

* * *

The last time
she’d seen him; he’d been broke and had been about to get kicked out of his
place. His band hadn’t found a paying gig in weeks and yet Gage had stayed
hopeful that things would get better – just later rather than sooner.

“I can’t go
on like this,” Kate had said with anguish as they’d sat in the half-filled
eatery having a breakfast she was going to pay for, again. Kate had been an
intern at a local newspaper and hadn’t minded having to stick the tab most of
the time, but she really wanted Gage to do more for himself.

He was so
smart, confident and good natured. He could be anything he put his mind to.
Instead, he held on to his musical dream with a band that couldn’t even seem to
keep itself in the studio time needed to make their first album “demo”.

“Babe, I know
what you’re thinking,” Gage had replied, his curvy lips slanted in that
gorgeously winning smile. “But you’ve got to have faith. If not in my music,
then in me. I’m not going to fail.”

“Maybe…maybe
if you put this same enthusiasm in some other endeavors,” Kate remembered
saying hesitantly as she tried not to make him feel too bad. “You told me you
were studying programming in college before you dropped out to focus on your
music. What if…what if you tried to complete your degree? Or get another job?
At least till this music thing can get off the ground.”

A frown had
marred Gage’s smooth, broad forehead. “Music thing? Kate, rock is my life. I
live and breathe it. Sure, I’m good with computers but I’ll never be happy
cooped in some cubicle for the rest of my life. When I play, and sing, that’s
when I feel the most alive. I’m not going to start slaving over a desk or a
bunch of computers just to get by. It takes passion to succeed and I can’t see
myself having passion for an IT career or whatever else you think I should be
doing.”

Kate noted
his irritation from the way he dumped his napkin on the table and pushed his
half-eaten plate away.

A shuddering
sigh escaped her. “You’re wrong, Gage. It takes more than passion to succeed.
It takes a sense of responsibility, of knowing when to grow up. I can’t be with
someone who doesn’t even want to see when it’s time to change the dream for
something real, and worthwhile. I’m thinking we should just…part as friends
before this gets any deeper and one of us gets hurt.”

Even now,
five years later, Kate could remember the bottomless, shadowed look that had
taken over Gage’s whole expression. He’d seemed shocked, dismayed, angry and
betrayed all at the same time.

“You’re
breaking it off, like this?” he asked, looking around at the surroundings with
its low buzz from the few other clients in the trendy food bar.

“Don’t make
it sound like that,” she said in a hushed voice. “If you could just…agree to at
least consider trying something else…”

“Then what,
you’ll give me a second chance?” he asked, suddenly smiling wryly. He took her
hand, pressed it warmly with his fingers. Kate felt warmth and still, an ache
at the same time. It was then she knew that though she still loved him, she
couldn’t continue to be with him.

“You know
your problem, Kate? All work and no play,” Gage admonished, thumb rubbing on
the sensitive curve between her thumb and index finger.

A rush of
sensual awareness shot up her arm at his caress, and she quickly pulled her arm
away. Gage might be the sexiest man she’d ever met; but there was more to life
than hot sex, a handsome face and a charming personality. Futures could not be
built on that.

“You on the
other hand, are the exact opposite,” she said calmly, gathering up her things.
“You’re
all
about play, aren’t you?” Kate sighed raggedly.

She’d always
been teased by him and his friends as being much too serious; a pessimistic who
hardly saw the bright side of things. Kate loved to have fun like everyone else
but she also knew what it was to not have a stable life. Her father had been so
much like Gage.

Kate’s father
had got on in life with his looks and personality for as long as he could. But
he’d been unable to cater for his family while sticking to his dead-end
vocation as a writer. Kate’s mother had ended up working two jobs and sometimes
three just to keep the family going. And now, Kate wasn’t about to make the
same mistake by falling for someone just like her father.
The Dreamer.
Dreams
didn’t pay bills and they certainly didn’t provide for the future. Kate felt
she deserved more than that.

That sunny
day, she’d risen from her chair to gaze down at Gage, her eyes filmy with
moisture even as her chin squared with resolve. “I’m sorry we weren’t good for
each other.”

And she’d
meant it. She was sorry that she couldn’t be the happy-go-lucky, rock
band-supporting carefree Kate Preston that Gage and his pals wanted her to be.
And she was sorry he couldn’t be the normal, everyday working guy ready to earn
a proper living the way she thought he should.

Gage’s eyes
had narrowed and she could see his hands clench on the tablecloth before he
stretched the palms flat as if to deliberately calm himself. At last, he said
quietly, “If you walk away from me now, I hope you know it’s for good? Because
there’ll be no going back. It’s over. But if you stay, and sit down and talk,
and work at this, then we still have a chance.”

Kate shook
her head, smiling as the glitter of tears finally faded and she could see
clearly. “That’s just it, Gage Stevens. We never stood a chance to begin with.”

She’d walked
away that day and didn’t regret it. Because she told herself that from the
start, Kate Preston and Gage Stevens should never have happened. They were too
different. People say that opposites attract, but in their case, Kate couldn’t
keep blinding herself to the truth. If they stayed together, they’d end up
hating each other. So it was best to break up before discontent on either side
poisoned them both.