Rock Me Gently (7 page)

She shoved her plate away suddenly and searched around for the waitress.

“It was a joke, Lainey.” Well, he hoped it was a joke. He hadn’t exactly been the most responsible guy for the last ten years, so God only knew what he had running around out there. But no one had ever come forward to accuse him of being a deadbeat dad and, with his money and his past fame, anyone could have come forward and claimed anything just to get a payout or their own fifteen minutes of fame. And it wasn’t as if he were hiding. He was easy to find.

“Yeah, I know.”

“Okay, so, I’m a teacher, not a comedian.”

“I’m sorry, I’m not the best company these days. I think this was a mistake. I thought that I could sit here and play nice but I’m just not up for it. I’m sorry, Jason, I’d just like to call it a night.”

“No problem, another time.” Although he was disappointed he signaled the waitress who’d kept an eye on them all night.

Jason threw some bills on the table for a tip and paid the bill at the counter. Holding the door open for Lainey to exit the restaurant, he stuffed the receipt into his inside coat pocket.

They began the walk back to their cars.

“Are you going to call her?” Lainey asked, looking up the street and not at him.

“Who?”

“The waitress.”

“The waitress?” He frowned wondering what the hell she was talking about. It wasn’t because he’d given her any attention. “Why would I call her?”

Lainey reached over and pulled the corner of the receipt out of his pocket. She held up the piece of paper and turned it over. On the back in swoopy lettering it read ‘Candi’, the ‘i’ dotted with a heart, and a cellphone number under it.

Jason’s gaze met Lainey’s. “I didn’t even realize she’d done that. How did you?”

“Old habits die hard, I guess. Women were forever giving my husband their phone number in new and creative ways. It didn’t even matter if I was with him. Some women just have no respect. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to look or to pry into your personal business.”

He knew exactly what some women were capable of and at the time he’d taken complete advantage of what was offered. “Here, you take it. I don’t want to call her.”

“No, you keep it. You may change your mind. She was pretty. You probably should go out with her.”

Jason stopped in front of her and waited until she looked up at him. “I don’t want to go out with her. Actually, I don’t want to see anyone right now, but you.”

“Then you’re wasting your time, Mr Westlake. I’m not ready to see people, especially men that look like you. I’ve been there, done that. And I will never allow myself to be hurt in that way again.” After stepping around him, she then continued walking.

“So, what, are you just going to date hideous-looking men?”

“I have no intention to date at all, hideous or drop-dead gorgeous.”

“Ever?”

Extracting her keys from her bag, she hit the button on the key fob and it unlocked the driver’s door, as they pulled level with her car. Ignoring his question, she opened it. In an attempt to keep her from getting into the car, he placed his hand on her arm.

Her weary gaze met his.

“You don’t strike me as the kind of woman who could spend her life alone.” He gazed down at her, crowding her, his face close to hers.

It was then that he saw the fear coupled with desire in her eyes. She wanted him too, but she was afraid to allow herself to feel. She was a passionate woman. Of that he had no doubt. There was major sexual tension going on between them, just as he’d known from the moment she’d walked into his classroom. His heart pounded rapidly.

“You don’t know anything about me.”

“Maybe not, but I know what I’m feeling and you can’t deny that you’re feeling it too.”

“But I don’t want to feel anything.”

“Maybe not, but it’s happening anyway.” He leaned down, wanting to kiss her so bad—to taste her sweet lips. He wanted to steal her breath right out of her mouth, but her eyes darted around his face and her shoulders rose in a defensive shift. At the last minute he made a detour and kissed her cheek. Backing away from her, he took a step back and another, giving her room. “Have a good night, Lainey. Drive safe.”

Hoping he’d made an impact, he left her standing there, walked across the street to his own car and headed home, alone.

Chapter Four

Lainey sprayed the glass of the front display case then wiped it down with a paper towel but her mind was not on the task. Jason was the only thing on her mind and every time she thought of him that little simmer bubbled low in her stomach, sometimes sending little tingles of feeling even lower. Worse, every time the bell hanging from the door jingled she looked up in anticipation hoping to see him standing there. Then she would berate herself for it. She shouldn’t want to see him. She was just asking for trouble. He was an amazing man to look at. Maybe even more attractive than Thad. Viciously, she wiped that thought from her mind. There would be no comparing Thad to Jason in any way, shape or form. Lainey didn’t want there to be any similarities between them. She would prefer not to think of either of them at all. But thoughts of Jason kept occupying her mind, making her yearn for and think of things she had never thought to feel and do again. She never wanted to immerse herself so deeply in another person again.

Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on how she was thinking at any given minute, she didn’t think she would see Jason today. Not that she wanted to, she told herself. She’d made it perfectly clear that she wasn’t ready for anything. But every time she replayed last night in her mind, she was certain she came off sounding like a complete and total bitch. 

Why had she even brought up the waitress’s phone number? She should have just minded her own business. Nevertheless, she’d felt a pang of that old jealousy and had acted on it before she’d thought better of it. She had no right to feel anything. And she didn’t want to—especially jealousy. She hated that feeling. That loss of control, of being betrayed. It was something she wouldn’t wish on her worst enemy. Well, maybe Thad. He’d changed so much. Lainey didn’t even recognize him. She hated the Thad that he’d become and only felt grief for the man that she’d fallen in love with and lost. And he’d loved her too. Back when he had been a nobody—before fame and fortune had gone to his head. And maybe even the steroids. She wasn’t sure. There hadn’t been any proof. But what else could she attribute the sudden change in his behavior to? She could have handled it if he’d just fallen out of love with her. Yet the man she’d known would have had the balls to come out and tell her to her face that he didn’t want to be with her anymore. Lainey shook her head. She could drive herself crazy going around and around all the theories to explain the sudden and drastic changes in Thad.

After tossing the paper towel into the garbage she then tucked the glass cleaner back under the counter. No more Thad. No Jason, she vowed, but even just thinking his name sent another wave of excited little butterflies in her stomach. She gazed into the mirror. 

“What, are you fifteen again?” she asked her reflection. “Nope, certainly not. You are old and washed up. That’s what you are.” She examined herself disdainfully. As if a man like Jason Westlake would be interested in her. A wounded divorced single mom with baggage. Lots and lots of it.

Pulling her dark hair up, she secured it with one of the pretty new tortoise shell clips that she’d just consigned to the shop. She gave her hair another twist and held it with the identical clip on the other side. She always thought she seemed a little younger when her hair was up. Silly probably, but right now it made her feel better. After selecting a pair of elegant pearl drop earrings from the display tree Lainey slid them into her ears then stepped back to admire them.

It was nearly four. Another hour, she’d close up the shop and head home to her empty house. She hated it there now and was actually looking forward to the day it finally sold and they could leave it. The thought of Thad with other women in their house made her sick to her stomach. Apparently, he’d done it everywhere else too, but knowing he would be so blatant, so bold was just another slap. “I told you to stop that. He’s not worth it,” she warned herself then turned her back on the mirror.

Maybe she should just give in and let Thad close the shop too. Screw it all—him, the house, the store. Perhaps just give up everything and start over somewhere else. When Jilly started college she could just move with her. She’d give Jill her freedom, of course, to have the whole college experience, but Jilly would know that her mom would still be near if and when she needed her to be. The possibility of opening a new store wherever Jilly landed wasn’t out of the question. But it still burned all the same. Just as much of her hard-earned money had gone into the place as Thad’s. She’d worked her ass off at many different jobs while Thad had tried to make his way to the NFL. She’d supported them all for years. The shop, the concept, the location, everything else had been her idea from the beginning. Thad had put up half of the original start-up cost, when he signed his first contract. On opening day he’d shown up to promote the place then never given it another thought after that. He didn’t care about the business or the house. “
You came into this marriage with nothing, you’ll leave it the same way,
” he’d said to her. That was true. But when they’d married, he didn’t have anything either. And they were happy that way.

Lainey started to do the normal things she did to close up for the day. She removed some of the more expensive merchandise out of the front window, so that it wouldn’t attract any would-be thieves to smash and grab, and placed the items farther toward the rear of the store or in the back. After refolding the few things that customers had rearranged, she made sure the lights and radio were off, and locked the back door. At the front of the store, she pulled out the deposit slip and bag from under the counter and totaled up the money in the till. 

A little better day
, she thought. Three hundred was better than seventy. But it still wouldn’t cover the rent or the insurance, or the twenty or so vendors who were breathing down her neck demanding payment. Finally getting smart, she’d been giving them Thad’s lawyer’s name and siccing them on him. Let him explain why they weren’t being paid. If this was all his, as he claimed, then Thad could damn well pay them.

For the next half hour she did nothing but watch the clock, learning long ago not to fill out the deposit slip until she’d actually locked the door. Nothing made her more pissy than to fill it out and have a customer come in and having to redo. But it would be great if she did make another sale before she closed up.

At exactly five o’clock Lainey turned the sign to ‘Closed’ and finished filling out the slip. Popping the cash in the bag, she then locked up and walked down the block subsequently tossing the deposit into the bank box. Back at the car she hesitated before getting in, then looked across the street at the coffee shop and decided to run over and get something for supper so that she didn’t have to cook or, worse, warm up soup for one.

The place was busy. She almost turned around and left but the smell of food lured her in. She stood in line waiting her turn, when from behind her she heard, “Well, hello, Ms. Clarkson.” And the butterflies in her stomach doubled and tripled.

Unable to hide the pleasure from her face, she responded, “Hello, Mr Westlake. I’m not really surprised to see you here.”

“Oh, then I have become predictable. Not like me at all. And yes, I thought you’d be here before you ask. That’s not true actually, I hoped that maybe you’d come here before you headed home.”

“Well, that was a mouthful of an explanation. I didn’t mean to accuse you of anything.” 

Raising his gaze to the ceiling as if searching for divine help, he chewed quickly on the gum he had in his well-shaped mouth. “Wow, that came off cool, didn’t it?” He seemed a little thrown and she liked it.

“All right, Mr Westlake, let me rephrase. I’m not surprised to see you here, but I
am
glad to see you.”

Now distracted, she was suddenly fascinated by his lips. God, he was an amazing-looking man.

“Really.”

“Yes, I think I need to apologize for my behavior last evening.”

“No need. I think maybe I came on a little too strong after telling you that you could set the pace and the rules.”

Unsure of what to say, she bit her lip. She didn’t want to have to define anything. “I just wanted to have coffee, Mr Westlake,” she ended up saying softly.

“Well then, we are in the perfect place.”

“Can I help whoever’s next?” the counter attendant asked.

Lainey was so flustered by his nearness that she couldn’t remember what she wanted.

“Two large, double double,” Jason supplied holding up two fingers.

While the clerk filled the order, Lainey took the time to openly examine Jason. He was dressed down today, compared to the usual designer suits. Worn, broken-in jeans clung to his shapely ass and powerful-looking thighs, while his formidable torso was topped with a tight dark T-shirt. It was so faded that she couldn’t decipher whether it had been black or dark blue when new. The customary carefully coiffed hair was even a mess, as if he’d been running his hand through it repeatedly. It stood up here and there, especially at the front. It made him look younger. Cute and easy-going, as if he might be easier to approach and relate to. Not that he’d been stiff or unfriendly in the suit but he was off the chart rugged-looking, especially with the thin layer of stubble dusting his cheeks.