Rock Solid (14 page)

13

H
ANNAH
WAS
STILL
in her robe when she froze in front of an email from the editor who had been interested in her series of articles on street racing. She had written to tell Hannah that in light of recent events, they had to decline to publish her work. They were very sorry.

Sure, they were.

In other words, she’d lost all credibility after the fiasco that had hit a major gossip magazine website, exposing the truth about Brody’s fake retirement and their temporary marriage arrangement. After that, everything toppled like dominoes. Brody’s sponsor had dropped him flat, people were calling about the wedding and her blog traffic had gone wild, but for all the wrong reasons.

She’d barely gotten started on her new adventure, and she was already finished.

Hannah tried to tell herself it could be worse. The photo of her sliding Brody’s hand up under her skirt in the gazebo could have been a lot more damning, considering what had happened right after that. It made her want to curl up in a ball of humiliation to think that someone had watched them.

They’d had to take the phone off the hook, and Hannah had shut down the comments function on her blog after receiving many X-rated offers from male readers.

Brody had been so angry, so upset, after seeing the picture that he’d taken off in the Charger, and Reece had gone after him, unsure if Brody was on his way to punch that reporter’s lights out.

“Are you okay?” Abby asked, handing her a cup of coffee and getting one for herself.

“I think so. No, maybe not. I’m not sure,” Hannah said, feeling as though the world was spinning far too fast. “I don’t know what to think.”

“Well, you wanted excitement, and it looks as though you got it,” Abby said lightly, patting her shoulder comfortingly.

“I never imagined this. I’m so sorry... I don’t even know why you’re still talking to me. I should have told you, except I couldn’t, not without telling you why, and that was Brody’s secret. But it was so hard, hiding the truth, and then when you guys went to all that effort, all that expense last night... I feel like such a jerk.”

“Hey, stop that. You’re not a jerk, and neither is Brody. The party was fun, and we were glad to do it, no matter what. Though this is an awful situation. When you decide to throw caution to the wind, you really go for it, don’t you?”

“Yeah, and look how well that worked out.”

“Things
will
work out, Hannah. It sounds as if he was really pushed into this fake retirement fiasco. Clearly that was the sponsor’s idea, even if they deny it.”

“He loves racing so much. This must be killing him.”

Abby reached over, covering Hannah’s hand with her own.

“He’ll handle it. You will, too. You and Brody still have each other, and that’s the most important part. You can figure out the rest as you go.”

Hannah looked at her friend incredulously. “You did get the part where this marriage was a temporary arrangement, right? None of this was ever real.”

“I don’t believe that. You’ve acted out of character, that’s true, but the risks you took, they were because you love him. And it’s clear that he’s head over heels about you. And it’s not a risk if there aren’t any stakes, right?”

“Thank you. That’s very comforting,” Hannah said grumpily. “The thing is that the fake marriage idea, that really was
my
fault. If I hadn’t blurted out to that reporter that I was his fiancée in the first place, none of this would have happened at all.”

“Why
did
you do that?”

“It was...an impulse. She was there, with her overly sprayed blond hair and fancy suit, sticking that microphone in his face, and you know, I saw the kinds of women who were coming around, and they all just... They were—”

“You were jealous? You wanted to stake your claim?”

Hannah’s jaw dropped. “No! It wasn’t like that at all. Or maybe it was, to a degree. I don’t know what we were thinking.”

Abby smiled serenely, which was really starting to tick Hannah off.

“Love is like that. Turns you completely upside down. Makes you do some really stupid things. And these schemes you guys were involved in, they were kind of dumb, but you were trying to help each other. Because you really wanted to be together, underneath it all. The rest was all...complication.”

“You’re reading too much into it.”

“Really? I thought Brody might kill someone when he saw that photo. If he didn’t love you, he wouldn’t have gotten that angry, right? He wasn’t even that angry about the sponsor, or the flack
he
was getting. But when he saw what had been done to you... Whoa. It was pretty hot, actually,” Abby said with a grin.

Hope stuttered in Hannah’s heart, but she couldn’t have any faith in it. Abby was only trying to comfort her.

“I’m not saying we don’t care about each other—we do. But we’re not in love.”

“
Then you really are lying to yourself,” Abby responded bluntly.

“Well, it doesn’t matter, does it?” Hannah said, sinking to a new low in her emotional well.

“Oh, I’d say it’s the only thing that matters.”

“Not when it’s one-sided.”

“You really believe that?”

Hannah nodded miserably. She knew Brody cared for her, but it was, effectively, her fault that his career had been lost. He might not see that yet, but it was only a matter of time.

She’d started this marriage rumor, and she was the one who had taken him out to the gazebo on that brilliant, daring exploit. Literally none of this would have happened if not for her, and he was bound to connect those dots as soon as he calmed down.

Even if they stayed together, when the racing season started and he wasn’t a part of it, he would only resent her for everything.

Hannah jumped when the beep signaling a text message on her phone sounded. She thought it might be Brody, but she quailed, seeing who it was from.

“Oh, no. It’s my mom. She wants me to call her right now. What do you think are the chances she knows?”

Abby sighed. “Well, you did give her that tablet for her birthday...”

“Great.”

“Listen, call her back and then we’re getting dressed and going out for some therapeutic shopping and lunch. And we should get pedicures.”

Hannah once again thought her friend had lost her mind.

“Abby, no. I can’t go out in public right now. It’s like walking around with a red letter on my forehead.”

Abby looked her straight in the eye as she stood. “You can, and we will. You have nothing to be ashamed of, Hannah, so stop acting like you do. I won’t have my baby’s godmother showing such an appalling lack of chutzpah
.
”

Hannah opened her mouth to argue again when her brain shut her up again, catching up with what Abby had said.

“Wait, what?
Baby
?”

Abby grinned so hard Hannah forgot everything else going on in that moment and jumped from her chair so fast she knocked it back on the floor.

“I can’t believe it! You’re pregnant?”

“I am. We wanted to be able to tell you in person, so we could all celebrate together.”

“That’s so amazing... I can’t believe it. I mean, I can, but...wow. You’re going to be a
mom
. And I’m going to be a godmother. Can he or she call me auntie, though? I mean, I know I’m not family, technically, but—”

“Absolutely,” Abby confirmed. “You
are
family, Hannah. You’ve always been like a sister to me. You know that. No matter what, we’ll always stick by each other, and that’s why we’re going out to celebrate today, okay? Don’t let the trolls get you down.”

“Okay, I guess.” Hannah gave in. Maybe Abby was right. Not everyone cared about gossip anyway. She would have to show her face in public sometime.

“Great. I’m going to run back to the room and get some things, and we can meet back here in, say, an hour?”

Hannah nodded.

She did as Abby said, calling her mom, who didn’t know anything about what had been going on, thankfully. Hannah really wanted her mother to hear it from her first. And hopefully her mother would never see that photo. She was so understanding as Hannah told her everything that Hannah ended up crying buckets while still on the phone.

“Mom, I’m sorry this cost you money to come down, and the party, and now you don’t need to, and that I lied, and that—”

“Hannah, stop. I’m glad to be here, and I want to be here for you and for Brody. Who knows what could happen by Saturday?”

Why did everyone around her seem to think this wedding was still on? Didn’t they get that this was
over
?

But she wasn’t going to argue with her mother on the phone, and Hannah couldn’t deny that she was glad to have her mom around. That definitely made things easier to handle. If the people they loved weren’t angry with them, then that was all that really mattered, right?

“Okay, Mom. Thanks. I’ll see you later today, I hope, but I can’t make any promises about Brody. Things are really a mess.”

“Don’t worry about me. You let me know what you need. It’s all going to be fine, honey, don’t worry.”

Hannah shook her head in disbelief, hanging up the call. She had to get ready to meet Abby when she returned, though she was loath to leave the house. But things were out of her hands now, so she went and got dressed, unable to stop thinking about Brody, where he was and how he was doing. In spite of it all, and all the support from her friends and family, she craved his warmth and strength more than ever, but she wasn’t sure if that would be hers again.

Her computer chimed with another email, this time from the editor who had taken her first photos, the ones from the street race. He was backing out, saying they wouldn’t be running the photos, but they would still pay her a “kill fee.” He’d been happy to do Brody the favor of looking at her work, but she probably should send her photos elsewhere in the future.

He’d done Brody a favor?

Hannah’s mind reeled at the words.

They’d only taken her work in the first place because Brody had known the junior editor and had asked him to check out her blog.

Hannah had been so foolish.

None of this had been hers. Not really. Brody had set it up. No editor had looked at her blog and been dazzled by her photographic genius, she thought harshly. And Brody had never told her.

She felt like such a dupe, being so excited over her “success.”

Hannah thought she might be sick. Certainly he meant it to be helpful, or was it more that Brody thought she’d never succeed on her own?

When she thought about it, nothing she’d done on her own had gotten her any attention. She hadn’t seen it until this painfully clear moment. Why would a national magazine offer to publish her work out of the blue? Hannah had been kidding herself all along. About everything, it seemed.

Humiliated in more ways than she could keep track of, she knew she was letting Abby down, but she had to get away from all of this and think. Hannah couldn’t face her friend, strangers out in public or pretend that her heart wasn’t breaking into about a thousand little pieces, all of her dreams shattered.

As she was leaving, she stuck a quick note on the door, apologizing, and then got into her car and drove off. She had no idea where she was going, but as the distance increased between her and the ranch, and her friends—and Brody—so did the tears, until she couldn’t drive safely anymore.

When she pulled over, she found herself parked at the spot where she and Brody had made love in the back of her car.

She cursed as the tears became impossible to stop. She couldn’t go anywhere now without that memory riding along beside her. All of what she could have had.

Letting go, Hannah gave up the fight and cried for a very long time.

* * *

B
RODY
LOST
TRACK
of how long he’d driven for, the laps falling behind him as he looped the track over and over, desperate to find some clarity. Driving until he could think straight had always been his method of working through a problem. Focusing on the speed, controlling the car and not running into a wall pushed the garbage crowding his mind to the back, allowing only what was important to the surface. Today, that process yielded only one result.

Hannah.

When he’d seen that photo from the gazebo—or more specifically, Hannah’s face when she’d seen it—he’d been so angry he couldn’t even think straight.

It was his fault. Having dragged her into his mess, this PR stunt, getting married— What had he been thinking? Clearly, only of himself.

He’d encouraged her to take chances, to jump in and ask questions later, to be impulsive. She probably blamed him for all of this, and she’d be right to do so.

He still had to see her. If nothing else, to apologize. He’d been so furious in that moment, he’d had to leave when he should have stayed with her. What else was new? Brody Palmer had blown it again.

Pulling the car to a stop by the finish line—he was almost out of gas anyway—he saw Reece lying back in the seat of the Ferrari, looking as if he was napping. Reece had taken the new car on a few good laps, but then he’d become bored and let Brody run himself out.

“You finished?” Reece asked.

Brody nodded.

“Figure anything out?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

Brody opened the passenger-side door, and Reece put his hand out. “Nope. Not until you hit the shower.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“This is leather. Expensive leather.”

“My life is chaos, and that’s what you’re worrying about?”

Reece cocked an eyebrow at him, as if that was a stupid question.

“I’ll pay to clean the seats, Reece, but I need to get to Hannah.”

“Why’s that, exactly?”

Brody stilled, and then realized what was happening. Reece had been friends with Hannah long before he met Brody. He and Reece were close, but Brody had a feeling that his friend was not too happy with him for putting Hannah in this position. There was only one thing to say, and that was the truth.

“Because I love her.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”