Rogue Countess (26 page)

“Do tell me what you have been up to since your return,” Olivia continued in syrupy-sweet tone, “and what possibly could have kept you from paying your respects to an old friend like me.”

It was too much.

Without a word, Anna stepped past Olivia. She kept her gaze trained forward as she headed for the open doors about twenty paces ahead of her that led out the terrace. She felt sick and feared she may vomit. In her mind, she could hear Jude explaining how he had been too busy trying to get an annulment out of his unwanted wife to visit his former love. Perhaps with her gone, they might even set up an appointment for a private and romantic rendezvous. Olivia had never been faithful in her marriage and there was certainly nothing preventing Jude from rekindling the old flame.

Passing through the doors, she was relieved to find the terrace empty. She continued until she found a spot along the stone rail nearly in shadow. The night air was cold on her bare shoulders, but she welcomed the chill that raced over her skin. It allowed her to feel something other than bone-aching jealousy.

She hadn’t expected to have such an overwhelming reaction to seeing the two of them together. She tried to resist the sadness that threatened to overcome her as she stood staring out at the darkness, still holding her champagne glass in cold and stiff fingers. Something precious had been within her grasp for one terrifying and electrifying moment only to be yanked away by the one person she had never been able to compete with.

Strangely, along with the sadness was anger. Anger at her sister for always needing to have the best of what everyone else had. Anger at Jude for not seeing the truth when it stood right in front of him.

The start of the evening had been a teasing glimpse of what life could have been like if she and Jude hadn’t had so many obstacles between them, if they hadn’t already reached an agreement to go their separate ways. Being on his arm had been far too lovely after the last weeks of quiet distance. She hadn’t wanted to admit it until now, but she had missed him. She had missed the way the corners of his eyes crinkled when his smile was genuine, how his teasing comments sometimes infuriated her, as well as the way a simple but striking glance from him could inflame her awareness to the point that her every sense focused upon him.

Deep down, she knew better than to build dreams on false hopes. Even if there had been a chance of something developing between them as a result of the physical attraction that was still strong and vibrant, it could be nothing more than a temporary arrangement. And though a part of her dreamed of his kisses and pulsed with the desire from his slightest glance, her heart very simply might not survive such intimacy with him.

No, in order to retain her sanity she needed to keep him at a distance.

Unless…

Unless, she fought for him as Leif had suggested.

If she managed to convince him of her innocence in the plot that forced their marriage, it might help him to see her differently. But what if his feelings for her were strictly sexual in nature with none of the more tender feelings that tormented Anna? What if he still wanted the annulment? The idea caused a cold fist of fear to wrap around her heart.

The declaration of her innocence may not have any particular influence on his decision, and then Anna would have put her business and future on the line for nothing. No, more than that, she would have traded it all for a freshly broken heart, as Jude would be put into a position to reject her yet again.

Chapter Twenty-One

A footstep sounded on the terrace behind her and Anna stiffened in irritation. Couldn’t she claim just a few moments alone to compose herself?

She forced her tumultuous thoughts aside as she turned to the intruder, prepared to utter a quick pleasantry before excusing herself. But the words stuck in her throat when she saw Jude standing a few paces away.

She peered past him, expecting to see Olivia tight at his heels.

But he was alone.

Her heart thudded and she quickly blinked away the moisture blurring her vision. She should say something light and flippant to distract from the dark emotions that burned inside her, but nothing came to mind.

After what was probably only a few seconds, though it felt like near to an eternity, Jude spoke in a warm and even tone. “I thought you were long past hiding, Anna.”

“I’m not hiding,” she denied. “Was it difficult seeing Olivia again?”

Jude arched a brow in surprise at the abrupt inquiry, but then shrugged. “Not in particular.”

“But you loved her once,” Anna insisted.

He dipped his chin and gave a light shake of his head. It was hard to tell by his expression whether he was irritated or amused by her intrusive curiosity.

“It was many years ago, but I certainly believed myself to be in love with her at the time.”

“Were you very devastated when you heard of her marriage to the Duke of Clavering?”

“No, I was not.” Jude’s smile twisted with a subtle hint of self-mockery. “Which was probably my first indication that my feelings for her were not of the enduring kind.” He tilted his head. “Why so much concern about Olivia?”

Anna waved her hand through the air in a gesture both dismissive and helpless as she glanced away from the intensity of his probing gaze.

“I…I would understand if you wanted to spend some time with her. Don’t feel like you must stay by my side. You likely have a lot to say to Olivia after so many years,” she finished.

Jude approached her slowly until he stood in front of her. His broad shoulders blocked out the light flooding from the ballroom. They were standing on a cliff at the edge of everything she had thought she needed to be happy and the one thing she had never expected to have.

She tipped her face to look up at him.

When she met his gaze, sensation flew through her body, as if she were waking up after a long numbing sleep. Every nerve suddenly tingled and her mind jumped back to the times when Jude had held her with passion and desire.

He no longer looked at her from the cold distance of distrust. His jeweled eyes burned hot with emotion as they peered past her shield of false indifference.

He shook his head slowly as his gaze swept over her defiant posture.

“Actually, I have nothing to say to her,” he replied in a low murmur, as if he were thinking out loud. “And for some reason, I find myself wanting to be alone with someone else entirely.”

Anna’s eyes widened in stunned astonishment as Jude lifted his hand to wrap around the back of her neck and cup the base of her skull. With gentle but insistent pressure, he urged her closer. Instinctively, she dropped her head back and tilted her face up to offer her lips. Before claiming her mouth, Jude looked deep into her eyes, searching and questioning.

Frightened of what he sought and what he might see, Anna lowered her eyes until her lashes swept over her gaze like a veil.

Then his smooth and firm lips pressed to hers.

It was so very different than the other times he had kissed her. Those times had been an expression of passion and lust and underlying anger. This time, he seemed to be seeking something in the gentle pressure of his mouth over hers. He didn’t touch her anywhere else than with the hand that secured her. He moved his lips very carefully across the surface of her mouth before he attempted entrance with the decadent glide of his tongue against the seam of her lips. She parted on a sigh and her knees nearly buckled beneath her as her stomach erupted in a flutter of delicate sensation. He was patient and attentive with his mouth, tasting her in delicious sweeps and teasing darts of his tongue. He surprised her with a gentle and seductive clasp of his teeth over the fullness of her bottom lip. And he swallowed her gasp of pleasure as his mouth covered hers once again with warm possession.

They were both breathless and light-headed when he finally ended the slow, drugging kiss. Still holding her solely by his hand at the back of her neck, he smiled at her in a way that made her feel like she had entered some alternate dream world where love could exist without pain and despair. She had a thousand questions flying through her mind, but couldn’t bring herself to voice a single one. She was afraid the sound of her voice might break the strange and delicate threads that seemed to tie the two of them together in the intimate aftermath.

“Now it is my turn for a question,” he muttered in a smooth intonation that melted over her senses. “Why do you let your sister belittle you in such a manner?”

Anna tensed at the unexpected query. But Jude still held her with the hand behind her neck and he would not allow her to retreat.

She licked her lips before she replied. “It’s complicated.”

His eyes showed his disappointment in the evasiveness of her answer, but he did not press her for further explanation. Instead he lowered his head and met her eyes intently. “You have much to be proud of.”

Anna was too stunned by the compliment to reply. His father was the only other person who had ever deigned to say as much. And Jude was the last person on earth she would have expected to acknowledge her success.

As she stared at him with wide eyes, he chuckled, then brushed a gentle kiss across her parted lips.

He slowly released his grip at the back of her neck, then trailed the back of his hand down the side of her throat, across the softness of her bare shoulder and down the length of her slim arm until he lifted her gloved hand in his. He followed the path of his fingers with blue eyes that were dark and deep. Returning his gaze to her face, he smiled again with a half-cocked brow and a roguish gleam in his eye.

“Would you consider sharing a dance with your husband?” he asked.

“No,” she answered a bit too loudly. She was still too shaken by the kiss to hide the panic in her voice.

Jude eyed her with curiosity and teasing humor. “Why not? I thought we were going to give the gossips something to talk about tonight.”

Anna nearly choked on the nervous laugh that bubbled to her lips. “Trust me, a dance will most certainly give them something to talk about, though not in the way you intend.”

“Come now,” he urged, “what are you afraid of?”

She looked up at him with a pained expression. “I can’t dance.” Seeing the disbelief in his eyes, she continued. “No, I mean it. I never learned. When Olivia trained with her dance teacher, I wasn’t allowed to join. Father thought I would get in the way of her lessons.”

“But later,” Jude started to argue, then stopped as he must have recalled what she had said earlier about avoiding society. “You have never danced?” he asked incredulously.

Anna tried to shrug off her embarrassment over his reaction. “There was never any reason to—”

“Bullocks,” Jude interrupted with surprising forcefulness. “Come,” he said as he led her back toward the ballroom.

Anna resisted, but his grasp of her hand was strong and secure. “This is a terrible idea, Jude. Please don’t.”

He stopped just as they reached the threshold and turned to face her stubborn expression with one of stiff determination and slight humor. “Listen, Anna, it’s a waltz. I can guide you through the steps. All you have to do is trust me.”

Yes, but that’s an enormous request
, Anna thought as she allowed him to escort her to the dance floor. She kept her eyes focused forward with her head held high, refusing to look to either side. If he was going to force her to reveal herself as a clumsy clod, she was at least going to try to do it with as much dignity as she could manage.

He drew her to nearly the center of the ballroom then steered her around to face him. His curving lips and bright eyes displayed his pure delight in the moment, and Anna had to wonder if he was amused by her discomfort or if he just found a certain wicked satisfaction in placing her in impossible situations. She narrowed her eyes in a silent message that she would extract retribution if things did not go well.

He grinned wider and the corners of his eyes crinkled handsomely.

“Come now, love,” he murmured low so no one else could hear, “have a little faith. I promise I won’t let you fall.”

Far too late for that
, she thought with a conscious thump of her heart.

His hand slid around her waist to press against the inward curve of her lower back and he lifted her other hand in a gentle and elegant grip. Her free hand rose naturally to rest atop his strong shoulder. Their eyes met in a clash of pride, merriment, defiance and breathless expectancy.

With a devilish curl of his lips, Jude exerted pressure with his hand at her back and pulled her in toward his body, indecently close, until they stood with only a few scant inches between them. Warmth flooded her limbs and Anna’s lips parted as she drew in a deep breath to clear the sudden dizziness that hit her.

Then, before she could form another coherent thought, Jude swept her into the steps of the waltz. He must have known that by surprising her he wouldn’t leave her an opportunity to resist his direction through those initial movements. All she could manage in those first few turns was to hold on and keep up.

She had watched the dance performed enough to have some basic idea of the rhythm and pattern of steps, but the feeling of being whirled about in Jude’s arms was nothing like she could have expected. His strength surrounded her and the subtle messages conveyed through his hands and his eyes guided her movements as if she were nothing but a collection of feathers being manipulated by the wind.